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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 116. page
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>average woman can go on tinder for a quick gangbang any time she wants
>I can't even get as far as holding a girl's hand
Fuck me I just can't take this anymore. Why did I have to be born male? It's so unfair.
25 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>tfw tinder whores
>tfw not a faggot looking for love
>>
>>17774482

It's not about being male, it's about being undesirable. Look at the things you may be lacking and put in the work to improve them. Also, don't look for girls on tinder if you want something more than a hookup
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>>17774482
you also could get dick easily if you want to

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how do I get a gf
I'd date literally any girl that doesn't have intelligence-related disabilities
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hard seeing as they're WOMEN

HAHAAA ZOOOM
>>
By getting out of the basement and talking to girls.
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>>17774468
you expose yourself to an environment with girl. listen about or go up to girl of interest. introduce yourself, find out about her.

"hi, i'm OP, mind telling me more about yourself? hobbies? likes, dislikes?"

then she might say, "and you?"

and you say yours and then ask questions relating to her hobbies and then keep messaging her or talking to her and then in 4 months time on the 12th day of the 4th month (i'm specific for a reason) ASK HER OUT that way you have...
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tl;dr: How much control should your bf/gf/wife/husband have over your fashion choices or things you do with your body?

I'm freshly single. I've always wanted to try shaving my head, and about a week ago I was pretty heavily drunk, and it gave me the courage to just hack all my hair off. It was very impulsive, but I've always wished I had the courage to just do it. Literally the moment my bf saw it, he blew up on me, saying how ridiculous it is that I'd do that without even checking with him. I had hair down to my mid back, and now it's barely...
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He probably thinks you joined a cult or started browsing /pol/
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>>17774455
It's your choice to do whatever you want with your body. It's his choice to leave you if you do something disgusting with it.
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>>17774455
I have a friend with a shaved head who's dating a pretty chick who also shaved her head. Dude sounds depressed when talking to me. He cheats on her semi regularly though, apparently she doesn't know though it should be obvious why.

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I am 26 years old, but I somehow managed to get a 19 year old girls number through a friend. She is super hot and very very innocent and nice. I was wondering what is the best way to "get" her? She is very naive and oblivious to stuff. I feel like I have to play/manipulate her through text. I am an ugly, virgin so I can't see any reason why she would like physically.
10 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Being confident and manipulative will get you far.
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>>17774425
>very very innocent and nice
>very naive and oblivious to stuff.
Is this what you believe?
or is this what you know?
>>
>>17774425
Get off 4chan would be the first step.

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Im not sure if anyone relates to this, but when I have to speak in public or attend an interview, I use to think slow in the sense that I get stuck with words, and cant come up with ideas. After the event, I think about what could I have said and I come with brilliant replicas, lines etc. Whats going on? What can I do?
9 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17774417
you need to find a way to be more comfortable speaking with strangers/random people

I would assume you get stuck with words because you're a bit too anxious and that starts to affect your ability to to speak deliberately and concisely

or you could just be an autist, like the rest of us on 4chan, in which case you're out of luck and have to find some alternative to speaking face-to-face with people
>>
>>17774417
Get some self-respect, standards, courage, a conscious and a lot of quality literature books.

Most people who talk slowly are usually standardless, hypocritical, compulsive liars, prone to sudden rage because they actively lower their own thinking rate so they stop thinking about all the problems and what a shit person they are.
Not like you'd be one, but you're also not doing what's right in order to improve.
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>>17774682
>quality literature books

Which do you recommend

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how the fuck do I get a friend?
I'm 25 years old and don't have a single one
no acquaintances, nothing.
I just want someone to talk to or something I'm starting to go insane
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>>17774392
Be useful, and be prevalent. Friendship is made through two things: proximity and utility. Not nessasarily one or the other, and not nessasarily both.

Be around people. Make sure you're well groomed. Get a hobby. Get a job with people you'd like to work with. Thus, proximity.

Utility works more if you are in a position of power. Think having a car in highschool before anyone else. Sure, you're getting used for rides at first--but that's how you make connections. Utility gets harder...
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Slap them with your penis to mark them
>>
25 too and in a similar boat, how did things get this bad man?

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Gf told me that our relationship is boring. Anyone got any advice to help me
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>>17774325

If she has been distant, she might be gently trying to tell you it's over.
If she's still being affectionate towards you then she wants you to step up your game.
Spontaneous day trips, little surprises on special occasions.
Things that remind her you are happy to have her in your life. Love notes, couples games, use your imagination.

Though it seems unfair, alot of women still expect men to keep up the romancing angle long after the relationship has become routine. Keeping her excited...
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>>17774389
Thanks man, she haven't been distant but she's claiming that she's the reason why it's boring since she doesn't want to do anything?? That's how she described it. She has depression and has a social worker to talk to so I don't know if Its her or she isn't feeling herself
>>
I feel like I have the same problem. I was on a date and I couldn't help but feel she was bored, checking her phone multiple times, claiming to be tired etc
What can I do when the conversation stops and nothing is happening?

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What's a good way to deal with a nine-hour security shift?

I'm not allowed to bring a phone, or do anything fun. And I gotta leave in two hours. Damn it.

Sudoku maybe?
13 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17774322
what are you securing
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>>17774327
Airplane in the dessert.
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>>17774333
CIA?

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my dad die a year ago and my sister is the executor of the will and it say that we each get half but now she won't talk to me nor has she given any money to me also when i look at his bank account she is still paying for his phone tv internet and utility and she made a check in his name to make a payment on her house with it she also has his truck this hole time and has not given me anything for it and took 25k saving out of his bank and i don't even know where that is. so should i seek out a lawer do i even have a case and what type of lawer should i seek
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Yes....this is a big no no and she cannot do this.
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>>17774306
Get a personal estates lawyer. Take her to the ringer since it states clearly in the will that you get half.
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>>17774306
your sister is either a bitch

or

you're a useless neckbeard that doesn't deserve other peoples hard earned money

though my judgment not withstanding it is illegal
to ignore what's written in a will, even if it seems to be unreasonable

but before you can make a case out of it, you're going to need a copy of the will and some proof of it's authenticity

if there was only one will and she destroyed it, then, legally, it never existed. Usually a will would...
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Then she cancelled (without me seeing it, on Gchat) and once I got there she refused to see me.

She said she was sick, she said she was at work (until 6:30?) then... Asked me if we wanted to "go shopping" together.

I was fucking furious and I threatened to publish her sex tape.

My question - why did she ask to see me yesterday, eat Italian, and then cancel on me today? She has a boyfriend I was hoping she would cheat on with me, she did before once.

I spoke with her yesterday and told her all about what was going on in my life... I feel...
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>>17774273
ur an idiot. move on with your life.
>>
How far did u drive?
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I drove 1.5 hours

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Forgot to put back key @ work,
What should I do? I'm thinking of popping up before they open (they have more, but I don't want them to think I took them purposely)
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17774234
I should clear up, that it's the key for break room/office and that it only use is for that
>>
Just notify your manager it will be fine. I have done this countless times
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>>17774240
I called and left a voicemail
I just hope she actually gets in and answers
I'll still come in at opening & notify her in person

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What are the problems of having sex too soon in a relationship?
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There are no problems inherent with it. Usually this is just an excuse for immature cunts to pretend they aren't shit at relationships.
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>>17774239
What?

>there is nothing wrong with it so long as it is actually a relationship, and not manipulation with the intent of getting laid
>>
>>17774218
easy way to substitute physical intimacy for developing a deep emotional bond, thus making your blooming relationship into a shallow fuck-buddy situation where you both have just a little too many feels for each other to be comfortable fucking and leaving but not enough to be genuine with each other in the moment

>usually have pinup girls as my phone wallpaper
>tell the gf I especially like this one because it reminds me of her, send her pic related
>she has gone North Korean levels of ballistic

Why?
27 replies and 7 images submitted. Click here to view.
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women are literally fucking insane bro
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>>17774104
What is she saying exactly?
>>
>>17774104
Lots of women find porn gross, but don't say anything because they know 90% of guys won't accept it. And then even if they're more tolerant, they often still don't want to hear what you like. Makes them feel inadequate and that they have to compete.

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>>17774094
Get him help
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>>17774094
Because that's just how he is....
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>>17774101
I tried but refuses. His parents really disapprove and I'm scared they'll send him away. Although I in no way find him attractive he is still my friend.

I've given up on life. I blew my money on weed and lost my mental edge. Cigarettes, booze. I'm a fucking burnout at 22 years. My family is poor, we come from nothing. Neither of my parents went to college, so I'm trying it but of course it's not working out. I've just given up on everything. My soul is crushed, heartbroken. I don't care about anything anymore. If I end up homeless, I'll just let myself die of thirst. I can't kill myself until my father dies. Just letting myself die.

The only friends I had ditched me a year ago....
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It's not a bad thing to have not gone to college yet. There's plenty of people who have gone and chose the wrong field of study, and then end up regretting it afterwards. And if they didn't work during that time they might be worse off, as at least you have experience.

As far as meeting people, you have so many options with the internet. Chatrooms, gaming, meetup.com.
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>>17774123
U dumbass, this man is dealing with serious drug induced depression. Going bowling with eric isnt going to fix this.

Listen Op, you need to get your head together. First you need to make a committment to walk away from weed and booze completely. You yourself see that your overindulgence in them has only drained you of clarity and desire, but these things are not gone forever. They were easier to lose than theyll be to regain, but you CAN regain them with COMMITTMENT. i fucking swear this to you.

You...
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here you go man

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How to get over insecurity?

I get mad at my girlfriend for stupid things and i realise I'm wrong after.

In the moment of anger I can't convince myself that I'm in the wrong. I can't control the urge to confront her. What do i do?
7 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17774080
honestly think you should talk to a professional. you are exhibiting abusive behaviour. it's good that you are recognising it, but it is serious and isn't easy to change your behaviour at the drop of a hat. please seek help. for her sake.
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>>17774146
How is it abusive? I never hit her or insult her or anything. She holds up her end of all the arguments well enough
>>
>>17774080
>>17774186
you have to realize this when you get into an argument so you can walk away to cool off

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convince me not to get revenge on someone. particularly illegal revenge. i normally dont mind getting into details but i know that person goes on 4chan.
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If your a nobody loser will commit a murder suicide rampage and have your name, photos on CNN, Daily Mail published while top psychiatrists analyze your manifesto in various documentaries....Yeah.

If you wanna do the crime, at least make it interesting. Otherwise you'll be in the lowest place having done nothing in your life.
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>>17774067
Dont mind getting into details
-> says nothing
Fuck you go make ur AW somewhere else
>>
revenge doesn't fix anything

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My boyfriend lashes out at me and hangs up on me when we're meant to be having nice sleepover calls and I feel like the worst person in the world even when it's always because he's lied a lot or been an asshole and then somehow it's my fault

how can I stop myself crying and feeling useless
9 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17774065
dump his ass
Why contribute to the "girls only like assholes" maymay?
>>
sit him down and have a very serious conversation about it
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>>17774065
Do both!

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I'll get straight to it

Bleeding from the ass for over 4 years. Only had a handful of good movements since then (I know this because I genuinely feel happy when it happens). I do have lumps i my ass when I do have a BM but they do not hurt and sometimes come out during. Poop is often dark but I wouldn't call it black.

I also experience back pain in the lower region and recently also in my mid-upper back on my right side. Also tenderness on my right side of abdomen and a pain under my left rib cage.

Also getting frequent infections lately (mostly...
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>>17774045
Mother of God, man! Have you not gone to a doctor?
>>
>>17774053
>>17774053
I went once to talk about it all but after the first thing I showed him (I had a lump on my jawline, I thought I'd start from the head up...LOL) and he gave me a perscription for anti biotics and sort of rushed me before I could say anything else. it was a busy GP day.
>>
>>17774086
yeah, they don't usually expect people who don't go to GPs to come in with a list of shit. just go back and talk about that one thing.

I've been thinking all day but I still can not think of anything, unu
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>>17774027

Detroit
>>
>>17774027

Ferreton-shire-ville.

With the Duke of nooks, the earl of fuzz and the king of nibs.
>>
faggot town

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>sometimes life just gives you what you need not always what you want
>Keep getting fucked over all the time

haha okay very funny universe. You can stop playing tricks on me now
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>>17774006
Care to be a bit more specific?
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>>17774006
>haha okay very funny universe. You can stop playing tricks on me now
blaming the universe for your stupidity

pro tip:
If you want the universe to stop fucking with you, then understand the universe well enough to the point where you can start fucking with it

it's not rocket science

IT'S EVERY FIELD OF SCIENCE IN EXISTENCE

or math, that works too
>>
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>>17774039
people usually say the universe gives you what you need, not always what you want because of some hidden lesson or something or keep balance in the world or whatever.

But instead I just keep getting trampled on by people or situations, so I'm starting to think the universe and everything else is just a big joke with no meaning and emotions are just waves which come and go, ultimately meaning or resulting to nothing.

So here you go. Have your (you)

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I'm in my first actual relationship with a gril after 21 years of autism.

What are some beginner tips? I don't care how dumb or obvious it might sound. I don't know how2 romance/boyfriend/intimacy
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>>17773997
My advice? Start things slow. Figure out what works for you and your partner. Build from there.
>>
Don't try to not be autistic.

Seriously, embrace your autism (assuming you're actually autistic.) Be confident and don't try to compensate by doing the opposite of what you initially think to do.

I'm really good friends with someone with autism who you'd never think was otherwise until you say something sarcastic and he can't tell. Be honest and open about it but don't dwell on it. Don't make the relationship ABOUT the autism and you should do fine.
>>
>>17773997

Confidence, confidence, confidence.

Also, ask about her day. If she vents, just listen, don't try to solve all her problems no matter how tempting it seems. Grills don't want their conflicts resolved; they just want to talk about them. Just let her talk and then say you're sorry that happened, compliment her, and offer cuddles and ice cream.

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Hey /adv/. I've tried few drugs now and been experimenting with alchohol for a few years now. Just tried LSD tonight and it was fun but I'm considering wrapping it up for life, because i dont feel substances give you anything worth their time. What's /adv/'s stance on drinking/drugs?
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Alcohol is not 'experimenting'. I was done 'experimenting' with alcohol after I hit 16.

Practice le meditation meme if you want enlightenment without substances.
>>
hallucineogens can be fun ocassionsly with friends. depressants such as alcohol or harder drugs with potential for abuse are asking for trouble that could range from losing a year of your life to a decade or two to your entire life also affected the ones around you.
>>
>>17773932

With alcohol I dont really mean the getting drunk bit; i mean how i feel about it in a social context.

Before I had ever gone to clubs and house parties regularly I thought I was missing out on something, but now that I've done all that stuff I feel much more indifferent about it. I fail to understand why I'd go to such lengths to get such an anti climatic experience to be honest.

Don't get me wrong I've had good times drinking, but I could have had just as much fun sober.

The...
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My roommate has a really annoying habit of inhaling really sharply like they forgot to breathe or something and it's driving me insane. I know it's kind of ridiculous to ask them to stop breathing, but what can I do?
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>>17773923
HAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAAHAAHAHA THIS IS RIDICULOUS
>>
>>17773938
HAHAHHAHAHAHhhahahhahahahahha
>>
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Oh my FUCKING god, my sister does the same shit and it drives me up the FUCKING wall. She also has this habit of exhaling really loudly like she was holding her breath for fucking 20 minutes or something. I've mentioned it to her before, but she doesn't notice it.

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Why do girls who have expressed that they don't want to date you, or even be friends with you, always act so friendly and chipper towards you when you see each other in public? That just makes it seem like they're (still) interested in you.

If you don't want anything to do with that person, why go out of your way to be nice to them? Again, that just communicates romantic or platonic in that person. And signals the social cue that you want them to approach you, or you want to be closer to them.
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>>17773922

No it doesn't.
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>>17773927
Yes it does. If you're being friendly with someone, they're going to think you want some kind of relationship with them. Whether romantically or just friends, that's what it communicates. If you tried that with me, I'm going to assume you want something more.
>>
>>17773927
If someone interprets your actions as X, then that's what it communicates to them as.

Okay. So. Gotta find a way to die fast. Only have like $200 in my account so it can't be something too expensive. Preferably painless but if it does the job, cool.
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>>17773897
What led you to this OP? Let's talk this out
>>
>>17773901
You're kind but it really doesn't matter.

I've been depressed since I was like 8 and been trying to find good ways to kill myself for at least the past 8 years. Tired of this shit, tired of trying and failing, tired for being taken for granted for and treated like garbage.
Last straw just broke the camels back and I just want to fucking end it and maybe make the lives of the people around me a little better.
>>
>>17773897
Forgot to mention preferably something my family doesn't have to clean up.

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I have a psycho ass mother. If you slightly inconvenience her she'll retaliate with 90 times worse. I've had bleach poured on my clothes, she steals my stuff constantly, if she's denied using the bathroom for 2 minutes she'll keep you up 24/7 by blasting Christmas music. She's an extremely abusive, hypocritical, cunt. I fucking hate her so much. I've been trying to get a job for a year but since I had to drop out of school, plus not having a retail job before (I had an IT internship at the age of 16 but they say that doesn't qualify or some...
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I'm literally on the floor right now.
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>>17773878
go to a support group or shelter or SOMETHING first.

If you're a dude you can pose as a LGBTQ youth if you can't find anyone to help a straight dude. Suicide hotline? Start googling resources bud. I'm sorry you're in this....... I know it seems like no way out.

It'd feel much better to be successful and rub it in her face though. Drive HER to suicide. If what you say is true, you don't deserve that yourself.
>>
>>17773933
omg this is great..pose as LGBTQ youth lmfaoooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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Hi, my name's Amelia.. Maybe I can lend some advice, too?
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namaste
>>
>>17773871
If you could come back as one animal, which & why?
>>
>>17773900
Not OP but I would come back as a black hole

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My gf is going to her friend's (male) 21st birthday tonight while I'm out of state because of work
Why would she so this to me?
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Because this is real life and it will always kick u in ur idealistic nuts if ever u grow too hopeful of a ho.
99% of girls in general are garbage relationship-wise, and you in american culture bruh.
Listen to some gangster rape if ur still tripping about this obviously scandalous bitch. Call her a bitch internally
>bitch
>bitch
Yeah thats it anon, keep going
>BITCH
>FUCKIN SKETCHY ASS NON LOYAL ASS BOOTY AINT EVEN THAT GOOD ASS HO

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>>17773870
If it's her friend then she has a right to go...If you don't trust her then why are you still with her?
>>
Because he's her friend.
You paranoid fuck.
Unless you have any sort of grounding in reality for your suspicions, you're just thinking about it too much.

File: pFU7mou.jpg (128 KB, 1280x720) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
pFU7mou.jpg
128 KB,
Alright /adv/ I need some technical help. I might have gone to /g/ but I don't really wanna risk getting banned for making a request there. I just bought a NW-700 Condenser Microphone and a Logitech HD Pro C920 Webcam to make videos (interested in politics and am considering a youtube channel just as a pet project). I am having a hard time finding good software for recording (editing is no problem), and the one freeware program that I am using (free-screencast.com) is just giving me shitty quality. Fuzzy background noise from the microphone, and the video is being delivered...
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MODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
NAH JK THO
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>>17773855
thank you for the bump even if that isn't advice
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bumping for halp


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