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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 260. page
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Hey /adv/, i am 17 living with my grandma. I don't go out much she says, also she says that i "have no idea what the real world is like" what is she talking about you think? I also have more questions regarding her.
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>>17677159
You do you - do you want to go out?

She just wants the best for you anon.
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>>17677159
I haven't been driving as hard as i could because all the places to work around me require me to be 18. My view of the situation is, once i turn 18 i will save my money and get a car. Getting my license soon on Halloween. I don't get it what is she trying to do
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>>17677177
I love the outdoors! But i don't have many friends and i honestly have no reason to go.

Last monday, I had a date with a cute 7/10 outdoorsy/climber girl. I met her on tinder and we went to shoot guns (she never did this before). Everything went smoothly and at the end of the day, we kissed a lot but she had to go. After that, she just ghosted me for a week and now replies with:

>Hey im sorry that wasnt my intention. I suffer from depression and this past week has not been kind to me. I just was unable to text you back......now you know my biggest fault.

Should I stick around or just leave her?
15 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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I would not even reply. I bet that's some bullshit. If you were Brad Pitt I bet she would forget she even had depression.
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I knew a girl like this, weirdly enough was another 7/10 climber and parkour type

Meh, you can do better, if you have options
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>>17677147
Not a lot of options. But she is cute and has an amazing ass. I just want to know if it's bullshit or a major red flag. After all, all women have somekind of issues. I bet some good dicking can cure all kinds of depressions

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I'm a deist.

What the fuck do I do?
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>>17677129
Get an education
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>>17677129
Look inside yourself and see how much it matters to you. If you're not okay with joining their church (if only in name) and for your kids to be raised in it, then you're fucked
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does it really matter
at least you're both not atheist

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So throughout my life I have only like the girls that everyone else likes. Like the prom/homecoming queen type (non-whore) and whatnot. I figured I might grow out of it but I'm 23 and it hasn't changed.

All my other friends around my age are either married or in a relationship, which doesn't bother me - I mention it because, well, I don't understand why they're content with the women they've chosen. I understand that love is in the eye of the beholder and whatnot, but I don't comprehend how they've committed to being with people...
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>>17677123
I think part of the problem is that you don't know what you want in a girl. As you say the prom queen types have it all, which makes them attractive to you. The reason you may think all of your friends "settle" for "boring" girls is because they don't have what you find attractive.
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>>17677272
>they don't have what you find attractive
Is it wrong that I respect that they find them attractive, and I'm happy for them for being with someone they apparently like, yet I cannot comprehend how they do find them attractive? At all? I feel like there's a part of my brain that didn't develop.
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>>17677301
Honestly in my experience that's fine. I have had plenty of friends with girlfriends I didn't see much in, and sometimes my friends couldn't comprehend what I saw in some girls.

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I am really sad. I am a disabled female and my husband and I just got married a month ago. We had our wedding a certain way so that I be able to do it with my disability his family did not support it, his sister and mom did and I am really happy about that but his father and rest of family did not. We decides to throw a party at our house with food and drinks before the wedding for them because we thought that even though they did not agree even though they know my disabilities that they come to the party and celebrate. They never came to the party. After we got married we got...
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Tell your husband you don't want to see them. He will understand.
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You'll have to give more details about what they didn't support.
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>>17677107
What was the specific way/what is your disability?

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>it is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all

Am I the only one who finds this to be bullshit? It's been four years and I still haven't moved on. If I never experienced it I wouldn't know what I was missing.
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>>17677034
Have you had a girlfriend since?
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You just need to get under someone else
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>>17677034
>If I never experienced it I wouldn't know what I was missing.

Well, at least you've had a gf at some point. Damn sight better than I have done

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this isnt highschool its university and this doesnt feel like flirting

I just exist and this always fucking happens
its not flirty at fucking all and its so confusing
they say shit like "no one likes you" "just leave" "I bet youll never get pussy" and etc etc
its happened multiple times and often its with girls I bearly even know
I dont even have a response other than maybe fuck off or I just continue what im doing

why is this happening and how do I make it stop
I just want to be happy and be liked by others
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Pic of yourself OP
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this is harassment and legally you can fuck her up the ass and profit !
i suggest you take advantage of this, casually voice record a couple of these incidents and lawyer up buddy, you can make $ from this
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>>17677059
im not unattractive
in fact I put a lot of effort into looking good

but obviously not in a gay way or whatever if thats what your thinking

guy who thought he got ghosted when she didnt reply for 2 weeks back here, she just replied with this. Im not fully relieved however, what should i answer with?
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You dont. Shes messaging you because shes bored and wants attention. Or do you really believe she was so busy she couldnt talk to you once in two whole weeks.
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Yeah, op. Don't respond. If you absolutely have to, just say "k."
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Do not answer until she show signs of actually wanting to catch up. All I see are excuses. Nobody is that busy they can't even fit in a snug or a fuck every once in a while.

If your text game isn't great, I'd say put her on hold and read up on how to improve, before you proceed.

At best, respond with one single text:
>as if. Maybe I'll hit you up when you've run out of excuses, haha

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>confident that I pass well
>I guess kind of attractive according to most people

But my problem is that no men I talk to stays commited to me after telling them i'm trans and it kind of sucks because the whole "men only seeing trans women as sex objects" is so true and I really find sexual favors tedious and I just rather be treated like a regular girl and not like a human fleshlight for once but I guess I can't because I haven't had SRS and don't really wanna get it anyways so...
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"Regular" girls are treated like human fleshlights.

You have to upgrade to a better type of man.
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>>17676933
Are the guys you usually talk to know you're trans or is it something they learn later on?
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>>17676933
put it this way op. if a guy wants a relationship with a women, why would he get with a trans women when he could have a real women?. i have never in life heard a guy say "yeah, i would date a trans girl" but they do often say they would fuck one.

Trans girl do get relationships but they are obviously going to be incredibly hard, especially if you dont look really good.

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GF of 2 years broke up with me yesterday.

I do not want constant reminders of her on Facebook or any social media site but I know I will succumb to the urge if I keep these active.

Should i delete my social media accounts? Anyone have any experience of this?
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Why not delete HER from your social media. Deleting your stuff suggests she her breaking up with you had that big an effect on your life and sends the wrong message. Just delete her or you will conflate the lack of interaction with others with her not being in your life and it will make ot harder to move on.
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I have.

First consider the chances that she might come crawling back to you (btw, is this something you want, or are you willing to let go of her completely? This is important)
The reason I ask, is because it might become an embarrassment for the both of you if you did delete her, and then a few weeks later, all your friends might see that "anon became friends with anonette. Again". There are probably ways to hide this, but anyway, it's easier to just hide her content from your news feed, and muster the power to stay away from typing her name into the...
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>>17676956
Succumb to stalking her profile every day.

I think deleting social media is the best.

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Am I wasting my time /ADV/? >Liked this girl for about 3 years
>Senior Year, so now or never
>Ask her to homecoming
>She actually said yes
>Never been this happy in my entire life
>Next day
>Eating lunch, reveling with my friends that I actually asked a girl out and she said yes
>Her friend approaches our table
>"Hey Anon, can I talk to you for a sec?"
>She tells me that the girl doesn't want to go with me and she wants to go with her "best friend"
>fuckingkillme.png
>Entire week before homecoming I'm depressed
>End up going with a girl who has no interest in me
>Really cool though. Says I can go slow dance with girl I asked originally (as I planned to)
>Slow dance song comes on... See her dancing with another guy
>SEETHINGRAGE.GIF
>I tell my "date" about it.
>She calms me down and slow dances with me out of pity
>After homecoming, angry but I still like her.
>And she's still single
It's been about 3 weeks, and I still want to try and ask her out. But be straight with me, is there no reason to keep trying? Thanks.
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Don't waste your time. I wouldn't
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>>17676915

>But be straight with me, is there no reason to keep trying?

I'm going to be straight with you. High school doesn't matter. None of it matters. Everything that happens in high school means absolutely nothing. You will forget about everything and everyone literally a year after you graduate.

By the time you turn 24 every time you think about high school you'll shudder at just how terrible it was.

Ask her out. Don't ask her out. Doesn't matter.
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Don't you have to be 18 to post here? Fuck off anyway, I'd an hero if I was as pathetic as you

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Hello, /adv/, I am new here and as the subject of my thread as well as picture shows, I am considering sudoku for myself, nevertheless I, well, could take some, well, advice. What's more painless? Painful yet quick? I could also talk about the reasons that brought me to this desire and feeling, but I guess that's... Moot. Heh.

Thanks beforehand.
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Just do it you pussy.
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>>17676905
Just go with whatever plan you have an idea of, or would you rather continue to live?
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>>17676905
donate ur brain

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Got a earring and piercing needle from amazon. I was wanting to change and went for it i guess. I wasn't feeling confident at the moment too. Now i do and not really keen as that time to do this but gonna do it.

So i wanna put two hoop rings at one side of my ear. I want them to be at left side but really from other people's view. Should i pierce my left ear or right?

My left earlobe is kind of thicker and there's a little lump so i thought it may not be a good idea to poke many holes there

Also do i take advil before piercing?
6 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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why aren't you getting a professional to do this
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>>17676871
4chan is 18+

if youre an actual adult, go have someone hygenic do it for you

otherwise advil will only help for soreness after the fact not the piercing initially. LOTS OF ICE on your ear just before so it goes numb and dont forget to sanitize the needle with a flame or alcohol.
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>>17676874
Thought i can do this desu
>>17676877
Yeah my friends were laughing at me for doing this alone
Is lighter flame enough?

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/adv/, how do I move on from a good friend ghosting me?

So some backstory: I had known this friend for over a year. We lived far away from each other so we were never able to hang out regularly, but we would text nearly everyday and visit each other occasionally.

My friend came to visit me one weekend in July, and we traveled to a nearby town together. She was happy when she first saw me, but I noticed that as the weekend went on she became more and more cold. She seemed better when we parted ways, but when I tried to text afterwards she never responded. I texted...
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sorry bud thats a pretty rough way of ghosting someone. really all you can do is move on
get it in your head that you're never going to speak to her again unless she comes back to you, which could very well happen, just be patient but with no expectations
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>>17676894
How exactly does one "move on" though? I honestly don't know how to stop thinking about this.
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>>17676898
you just keep going, meet new people and focus on whatever you do. you know that saying the best revenge is living well
you'll get over it after enough time has passed. you might not actually forget about it but you wont think about it as much or as often

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I'm looking for a bit of advice 4chan. Over the last 24 hours my girlfriend and I have had a massive fight. An end of relationship fight.

Prior to this we've had a rough couple of weeks. Things haven't been going well for us outside of the relationship and inside it. Work has been stressful and family and suchlike.

Just before this fight she had a friend from abroad visiting and ignored me throughout. I got to meet the friend for a few hours one afternoon and it felt like they we're both against me. I upset her friend by not respecting that...
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Back off for about a week, then apologize for being a jerk. Cut all communication for a day or two. Give her what she wants. After that, just text her simple "hi, I'm thinking about you" messages.

Above all else, listen, and I mean FUCKING LISTEN to what she's saying because she obviously feels like there's a fatal flaw somewhere.
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There are women out there who won't give you that kind of bullshit - if I were in your shoes, I'd stop trying to placate the gal you're with and set your sights on finding a woman who doesn't do shit like that.
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>>17676845
Should I let her come round tonight or should I just tell her to go home instead? Should I communicate that I need time to myself or just stop talking?

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I got drunk with a friend, and fingered her while we were both drunk, and the next morning was absolutely pissed at me. I feel awful. What do I do /adv/?
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>>17676820
Fuck her right in the pussy
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Did you force your fingers into her?
If not then stop being a pussy and letting her put the blame solely on you, typical female regret response is to shift blame onto anyone or anything else you were both drunk and you both let it happen.
If you did then lol you done fucked up, be nice to her and hope she doesnt file a sexual assault charge on you bruh
>>
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>>17676820
Well its not like you raped her or anything. Did she enjoy it while it was happening?

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Hi guys, I have a girl problem and I need some help in approaching this.

Basically I was in friendzone for about 6 months when things finally went wrong. She did love me and always gave me fake hope that there might be something some day, you know the story. We talked about it a lot. Like every now and then, and she'd always tell me that I'm the most amazing person she'd ever meet, that I made her calmer, that I knew her like noone has ever known her, but that she just doesn't feel 'that' way towards me and that she has no idea what she'll...
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self bump so it doesn't die til morning
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Out of the two, go for the first one. Better yet, don't talk about defining the relationship, and don't talk about feelings. If you know how to enjoy yourself, continue doing that. Be fun, pleasant, all that jazz, and when you've established proper, daily contact, THEN you start building attraction with her. Don't tell her your planning to, or planning not to, or whatever. Don't ever mention friendzoning, just do what you need to do in order to avoid it.
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>>17677145
What if she brings it up? It is very likely she will cause we talked completely honestly about our feelings all the time.

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How do I strike up conversation with people?
Not just like, "how 2 approach and speakles to a woman?", although that's definitely a part of it.

I mean just in general. I have literally no friends unless I already knew them from another friend. I don't feel uncomfortable with approaching new people or anything, it's just I never do because I have nothing to say.
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You just go up to someone and ask them a question.

People like to talk about themselves, just ask a question and you'll open them up.
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>>17676760
not this anon but i want to add that if people dont open up to you they are buttfrustrated assholes. You may feel like it's you that can't hold a conversation but it's very often them, a lot of people are just jerks who don't want to hold a conversation and they can get fucked. Remember that you are the better person for at least being open to a conversation.
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>>17676763
Person this post is replying to: Yes, I absolutely wholeheartedly agree.

Okay so bit of backstory;

>I'm her first serious relationship (as in, her past relationships only lasted like 2 weeks, we been together for 5 months)
>I'm actually her first kiss, and first everything else
>Got along really well always hugging holding hands all that jazz
>she maybe bi-polar, some daddy issues? (doesn't see her dad)

So anyway, I swear it's like the 10th time now. But I find that once in a while, she...
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>>17676740

Everything after the 2nd time is your fault. All of this is your fault. I didn't even read your post because I know with 100% certainty that everything going on in your life right now is entirely your fault.

If you want to stop breaking up, stop getting back together you fucking idiot.
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>>17676740
>She's 16, I'm 19
Found your problem.
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>>17676752
i agree. shes not mature

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My boyfriend is a racist Jew.

Specifically against black people the most. We live in Chicago and have been dating for almost a year.

I'm very liberal and he's conservative. He's a non-religious secular jew who was born and raised mostly in Israel but he does not match the liberal jew stereotype other than that.

Everyday all I hear is " nigger this nigger that" "that Chick is a mudshark", it's very annoying and offensive and I find it so ironic and stupid since he is from a persecuted group himself. I've never...
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I can't wait for /pol/ to see this
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he is from an apartheid state, what the fuck did you expect
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>>17676695
Well In that case I would understand/expect a hatred for Muslims but not black people..

He doesn't like them either, but it's on a whole different level with blacks, he even dated a Muslim chick.

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Why do we keep coming here?

It's very evident this is a hostile and violent social space, but somehow I can't stop coming here. I've done many things with my life but I'm always constantly bashed by waves of loneliness and sadness, and no matter how much I crave help, I can't help feeling miserable constantly. I'm a walking dead, I'm shut inside myself. I've a job, I've friends, I go to college, I date girls, I have sex, I eat, I sleep, I do everything a normal person does to keep functioning, but I'm always unsatisfied...
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>>17676628
>Why do we keep coming here?
>It's very evident this is a hostile and violent social space


Because that is exactly what you need.... Or this is exactly what you must let go of.... Either way, you need something... You are not a walking dead, you are so full of character and flaws you come to 4chan just like I come to 4chan as Universe Pie to sort you out. We all need all kinds of sorting out.... Always... faggot
>>
I find it oddly cosy.
>>
In real life you need to be polite and caring.
Here you don't need to be, it's refreshing.

I'm 23, just graduated, have a great high paying job, nice apartment in a nice town. I'm a smart guy, decent looking (I hope) though not "manly" so to speak.

My LDR girlfriend of 4 years left me and I'm feeling suicidal and constantly depressed. I feel like my future has been ripped from me, because she was my future. She was my entire life because I had no other friends and have always been a loner/loser. I wasn't "anon" I was "her boyfriend" in my mind and now I am nothing. I have no identity anymore, just misery

I...
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>>17676614
Forever alone :(
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>>17676614
Just saw a great quote that describes me well fml:

http://thoughtcatalog.com/johanna-mort/2015/10/read-this-if-you-feel-like-youre-going-to-be-single-forever/

>You feel as if Life has moved on without you and as more and more time passes you have less and less of an idea of where you’re even supposed to start.
>>
>>17676614
What do I do

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Hi /adv/
how can I stop viewing women as inferior? I dont even want that, and I also have some good female friends, but I just cannot really have double standards.
I mean I know women are supposed to be more emotional and all that, but I instinctively hold them to the same standards as i do with my guy friends, which means when they show their feminine traits I look down upon them.
Also I cant fucking stand them playing dumb to look cute, I know some men like that, but it just makes me want to slap them.
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They are inferior. You'd be lying to yourself if you thought otherwise.
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Do you even sex women?
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>>17676806
Come on

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I'm 18 and a Virgin. I intend to stay a Virgin until I've met a the right girl.

But its hard. I am horny 3-4x a day and need to masturbate otherwise my head is fogged up and I can not focus.

Porn doesn't really get me off. I'm craving to lose my virginity. I feel like I HAVE to.
But I don't want to just yet.

How can I control my sex drive? Its so frustrating.
11 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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It would help if you jerked it only a few times a week. Too much masturbation just makes you hornier. That and go find a way to expend your energy.
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>>17676599
How can I go about masturbating less often?
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>>17676605
Self control?

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Hey, I'm a Swedish first year university student studying physics. And I hate it. I hate my country, my education and myself.

I wanna do something different. After 19 years here I want to leave and do something else than school. Then I could come back and get a degree or whatever in something I'm interested in.

What can I do? I would like to just go to a warm country and live in a tent on the beach and surf or go live in the alps and ski every day and work in a restaurant in the evenings and nights or something. Or just go live in London and work as...
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Does anyone have any ideas on how to easily get away from my country and sustain myself somehow?
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>>17676588
> I would like to just go to a warm country and live in a tent on the beach and surf or go live in the alps and ski every day and work in a restaurant in the evenings and nights or something. Or just go live in London and work as a dishwasher in a shitty pub.

All of these aren't too realistic. If you stay in Europe these things will be very expensive - and you won't be able to comfortably live in London (or any Major Euro City) on a shitty job.

How long do you...
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>>17676637
The issue is that you will most likely have a hard time getting any sort of income no matter where you go.

If you want to do some traveling and make "experiences" you could do some backpacking - though that could be rough on just 2k.

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Is it better to say "lets do X" but in advance of it like planning it

Or to spontaneously say "lets do X right now you down"


Yes this is a continuation of that possible Christian girl thread

She just got back today and honestly its kinda late to try to do anything
Should I ask her if she's down for stuff tomorrow or just text her tomorrow and be like "lets roll"
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"Hey, I was thinking of doing X, would you like to join me?"

Note that none of these options make it obvious it's a date and could just be seen as two friends hanging out
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>>17676603
How do you make it obvious that it is a date?
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>>17676619

"Want to go to X?"

"Sure/yes/whatever"

"Cool, it's a date then"

Works more often than not, honestly

File: 2011sky [2560x1600].jpg (2 MB, 2560x1600) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Hey /adv/

I landed this sort of chill job recently at IT Support for SAP mainly. Although it seems as though I can just sit around doing nothing all day.

A few tickets get in and some calls here and there, however I can simply redirect the calls to whoever has been asked for and I am not allowed to work on tickets independently yet.

This job seems to have a lot of free time, even after being able to work on tickets myself officially. Their Internet Connection is monitored. I do have a smartphone with mobile data though.

What could you do to kill some...
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>read or listen to (audio)books
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>>17676578
i already read 4chan and forums just like back when I was a NEET. I have my smartphone next to my keyboard on low brightness and nightmode. the reflection of the light of the window makes it appear as though the screen is off.

If someone comes closer I can simply turn off the screen with the thumb from the hand rested on the mouse.

I was thinking about getting an ebookreader, that would be to obvious though I am afraid.
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>>17676566
Study something in the meantime

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>Girl flirts with me constantly, seems pretty interested in me
>Text her many hours ago that I'll join her in the cafeteria for dinner

I end up with no response and eat dinner alone. Why? How do I even confront her after this?
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>Text her many hours ago that I'll join her in the cafeteria for dinner
What were your exact words? What was the conversation leading up to that?
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>>17676541
She asked me if I was still interested in some girl, I said no, I ask who told her I asked said girl out, she said she wouldn't tell me. I then said that "I'd join her for dinner" and that she should "let me know when she's going." I assume she went without me.
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Should I call her to ask what's up? Text her? Ignore and forget about her?

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23, kissless virgin here

I spend my days playing video games, listening to music and browsing funny meme sites. Sometimes i got drunk with my normie friends. I like my life. I know it's not super exciting but i like it. I will finish my uni and get a degree at the beginning of 2017 and i will search for a job. For now, life is good.

However, friends and family are asking questions more and more often. "Is there any girl that you like?", "Will you bring a girl home someday?". And i have never had a girlfriend, i have never been in love with...
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How do you view sex and virginity? Both for men and women
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>>17676537
Damn, i don't really understand your post, engrishs not my mother language. I'm only interested in women.
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>>17676532

If you're just looking for some strange, then get /fit/ then Tinder/Grindr, whatever, or hit bars/clubs with your mates.

That said, if you're happy with your life (which, props, dude) then either:

a) stop giving a fuck about what they think and keep doing you
b) lie to them, say you've been on a few dates that didn't work out (or had a one night stand with some girl if you're talking to your cousin)

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I was so emotionally invested in someone and eventually realized they were an emotionally unstable narcissist who never truly cared about me unless they needed my attention. I'm angry with myself for ignoring so many red flags, but I don't intend to let that happen again.

But when will this sinking feeling in my chest go away? When will I stop wishing it was real? When will I stop reminiscing about the good times? This was my first experience of this kind and I've learned my lesson, it's been two days but I want to go on with my life.. How on earth do I stop grieving?
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>>17676518
>how on earth do I stop grieving?
dont push it away rejecting these feelings with make them last longer , accept what is .
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>>17676518
Red flags like what OP?
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go to the gym, jerk off, drink with your buddies but not by yourself and not too much, if youre sad allow yourself to be sad and sit in it for however long it takes to go away


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