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/adv/ what do you do about a friend that constantly ignores you and occasionally "forgets" to invite you to group meet ups?

it makes me really sad. i feel like a guy that's just there and not an essential dude to the group. I'm always a dude people just kinda feel whatever about. I don't get it. I'm nice, I'm friendly, I always try to bring something with me when I visit and be a good guest. Why do people not like me? :(
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>>17833811
sadly that person is NOT your "friend" and you just typed the reasons why

life your life ! find some things you like to do and go do them meet new people etc

meetup.com ??

you don't have to be the tag-along for some group of people
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>>17833825

But why? Why do they treat me like this? What did I do?

I don't know how to make other friends and that group is pretty much all I have.

All I want is a mixed group of people to drink and go to the club and dance with. Nothing complicated.

Like all I ask for is to get an invite it's so fucked up.

I'm very extroverted and social and often feel lonely due to my lack of friends.
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>>17833829
>But why?

i have no idea why that group of people doesn;t like you

find a new group of people to spend time with

get some feedback from somebody closer to you than some dweeb (me) on the internet

do you dress like a slob ? do you smell like a pig ? do you talk like a jerk ? are you a total boozer ?

idk !!

What the fuck do I do?

The caulking is totally fucked in my apartment's tub and I've neglected it for about 6 months and now its growing some black mold.

Anyone have any suggestions?

More pics to follow
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>>17833785
yuck

bleach kills mold dead but only need 50/50 water bleach mix

run the fan, that stuff will burn your nose, wear gloves, it will eat into your skin etc

then recaulk AFTER you clean it, or better just clean it then get apart mgr to fix it
>>
>>
>>17833794
I'd say your best bet is using some power tools. What usually works for me is using a cloth to dab bleach on the surface of the grimey areas and let it sit for like a minute.
Afterward I just use some good household ammonia and finish the solution by rubbing off all that mold and what not.
Dunno if it'll work for you

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Should I get help?

>Think about killing myself every single fucking day
>Always think of interesting situations that I could kill myself in
>Like standing at a intersection, and seeing a bus and the first thing that comes to mind is jumping in front of it
>Happens constantly, I don't even do it consciously anymore, just instantly pops into my head

I'm not particularly depressed, but I have wanted to die for the longest fucking...
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>>17833782
I'm in the same boat OP. Try and pin point where this feeling of wanting to die comes from. It might help. For example, I'm a lonely fucker who has no confidence and I don't see the situation improving soon. That is why I have these thoughts.

> I'm not particularly depressed
but
> I have wanted to die for the longest fucking time, and getting through life like this is fucking nightmare fuel
>This...
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>>17833799
Yeah, I guess they are signs of depression, but its hard to explain. I just don't feel depressed. Just want to die fucking bad. I really don't know where the urge comes from, but I started feeling like this when I was 19 (22 now), and nothing really triggered it. In fact that was the most un eventful year of my life.

Should I see a counselor or am I just fucked?
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>>17833817
>Should I see a counselor
Yes, obviously.
This is kinda why they exist, after all.

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Hey people, can you help me to make an important decision?

I am a 30 year old European guy who currently lives in South Eastern Asia. I have been working here for a year now, but it seems that my employer does not want to extend my contract so that I will be unemployed soon... However, usually I would say "alright, it has been a nice experience, but one year in Asia is enough, so now it is time to go home and see my family", but there is a catch and of course it has something to do with women:

I have a terribly cute and pretty Asian GF, she is absolutely...
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(4) Use the money to start a new life in another country (for example Thailand)
>>
(1)
>>
if its such a great relationship girl wouldnt want you to leave dumbo
or she would go with you and help you
obvious choice is going back home
5k is not much

Over the past some months, I've been experiencing hallucinations. At first they were mild enough that I wrote them off as my mind playing tricks. Errant shadows moving incorrectly against the light, voices muttering that could've been a television in another room or the neighbors talking.

Over the past few weeks they've become more... concrete. I still can't make out the words being said, but I often mistake audio hallucinations as someone talking to me and discover that no one's said a thing. And I now see full silhouettes of people often standing...
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>>17833774
>At what point....

yep you are past that point

please schedule semi-urgent appt with psychologist or psychiatrist NOT A THERAPIST

explain your symptoms get a diagnosis then get on the meds

poke around here

nami.org

and stop the drugs & booze these can cause trouble too

good luck
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>>17833795
I don't drink or do any form of drug, even cigarettes. Less because I have some ethical problem with them and more because I was poor growing up and by the time I could afford a habit I was old enough to know better.

Does every outcome of seeking treatment automatically end in medication though? As alarming as these hallucinations are, the idea of being drugged up or having a diagnosis that follows me for life is ten times moreso.
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>>17833810
dude if what you typed in op is accurate, ie. you're not trolling shit

then sorry to type this but your life is already fucked up, your brain has chemical problems and that's why your perception of reality is starting to fuckup

and getting on meds will make it better

again go to nami.org read the horror stories in their forums written by people like yourself who said - yeah i can deal with this myself & not take meds

or don't believe me i really don;t care too much

my...
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Does dating a girl make it easier when you are rejected?

I think knowing I have a girl will increase my confidence and make me less insecure
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>>17833659

Like, does it make it easier when you are rejected while having a girl? Might be missing something here.

In any case, if you have dated before, the future bullshits of relationships don't bother you as much. That is true for the most part, says I.
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>>17833672
I mean if you flirt with others girls while you have a girlfriend
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>>17833659

This is an incredibly stupid concept. It makes it harder to get a girl because you're with someone. Getting rejected is easier if you have a girl, but at the same time if she knows you're trolling for pussy it's going to make things worse.

tl;dr You're retarded.

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We used to hang out a lot, I asked her out like 3 times over the summer and we would always end up at mutual friends parties together. I never really made much of a move even though I liked her because I'm an inexperienced anxious mess. She started this whole thing by chasing me pretty hard, but eventually started hooking up with another guy. I stopped all contact. She hit me up to go to a party, made out with this guy in front of me, so I left and we didn't talk again for over a month.

Now she's back, and she seemed real interested at first. I asked her...
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>>17833657
>I asked her to hang out alone and we did drugs. I still didn't make a move.

Hey anon I want your dick
Hey anon I want your dick
Hey anon I really want your dick make a move

>No move

Why is she such a bitch? Ahhhh!
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>>17833674

Okay but she literally got my friends number and asked him to come over at 3am, which she has never done with me. Like one hour after we were hanging out. She asked a mutual friend for the number at 3am and opened my snapchat at 3:14am telling her to come over which I sent right before she showed up, then proceeded to fuck him.

That seems a little messed up, no? Am I just being salty?
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>>17833657
Congratulations, OP, you are now the gay friend.

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>Be compsci student
>While still in college I decided to help mom with a web system and remake it from scratch
>We're basically a super small company
>It's been 4 years since and the system has grown to support a ton of things with clients using it constantly
>Need to branch out and get a formal job

How do I put this experience in my resume? I'm just saying I have 4 years of experience, which is...
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>>17833656
was it a full time job to expand and maintain the system? if yes then put it down as 4 years of experience in a FAMILY business. this is different from working for someone else.

if no then specify it was over the course of 4 years but not a full time thing.
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>>17833664
No, I worked on it alongside my studies and I focused on achieving goals.

How, more specifically, do I specify it in the resume?
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>>17833679
>Work experience
>4 years - Casual - Company Name
>Over the course of 4 years alongside academic pursuits, built, maintained, expanded, whatever, this system for this company for this purpose

that's like, my initial draft anyway. you can word it how you want. i probably would change it slightly over the course of like an hour cos i'm like that.

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*TLDR* How can I stop exclusively reading books and do some adventurous cool shit? Do things "cool" and "interesting" men do.


Guys, I'm 23 and overly intellectual.

In high school I read the economist and scientific american cover to cover from 15-18 years old, I got straights As and didn't do anything but read. I was 300lbs, didnt dress well and rarely bathed. Today I am 220lbs, bathe daily, and dress well but all I do is physics for Uni (graduating with a masters this month) and read books on random historical topics. I enjoy...
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pick up a fun, active hobby. that's what i did anyway. i picked up skateboarding. cheap, easy to get into, can do it almost anywhere, and is a decent alternative mode of transport to walking or public transport. and also it's fun as fuck.
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>>17833653
try "contra dancing" do internet search for dances in your area - ezpz like coed walking aerobics, dont need a partner, caller tells everybody what to do, not specifically a pickup scene very fun activity

plus find some hobbies or activies you can do

meetup.com ?

it's your life you did all that stuff earlier why stop now ?
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>>17833653
Get a cool friend
He'd make you go out and do shit that he does like skydiving and getting you laid and then you can teach him books to improve his grades so he can stay on the football team

>friends with this girl
>we see each other a few times a week
>based on her touching me a lot (light pinches, squeezes, surprise hugs) im pretty sure shes into me too but maybe shes just super friendly so i don't think much of it
>this goes on for like a month
>we hang out alone for the first time a couple days ago and before i leave we hug
>as the hug ends i start to pull away but she...
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>>17833639
Alright famalam I'm going to help you. Don't cut her off entirely but now that she knows you have feelings for her what you need to do is make her WANT YOU. She knows you WANT her. I would try to make yourself more hard to be accessible that way overtime she desires to talk with you. Not having the physical contact you used to do is good, she will, overtime, want to do those things again if she ever gets feelings for you. Feel me?
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>>17833655
So talk but don't hang out?
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>>17833665
Not exactly, you can still talk to her but do it in a way when you text its meaningful and has the both of you wanting more instead of trivial talks. Of course I know you want more but she needs to have her chance to be the first one to initiate the conversation.

You can still hang out and have a good time but the hugging and pinching and squeezing will just not be there. I can't say exactly but you need to have an atmosphere around your being to make her want to do that.

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Basically there's this girl I've hung out with twice now and we get along extremely well, both into science, both kinda nerdy, she's always laughing at my jokes, the whole classic thing where it seems like we're a match, we're also both single

Right now she works, and is getting crushed by classes + finals, is self admittedly working + schooling from the time she gets up to the time she drops
Also turns out she has pretty bad depression


Anyways we just talked via facebook and she basically said she didn't feel like she could...
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Also this is the follow up the potential boyfriend vs just friends thread
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I also sent her a message saying "well i guess think about it is all i can say"

The next time she wont be busy 24/7 is sunday so that's when I'll hit her up again if she hasn't contacted me by then
>>
"i think you're a really nice guy but i just have so much personal stuff going on i just really know im not ready for that type of commitment you know?"

>"thats why I was saying once finals are done and stuff, like do you like me like that or is it just a time thing, like i dont mean funn on serious i mean like dates see what happens once we got time"

"I honestly haven't thought about it much. I definitely like you as a friend but i dont think i have developed the same feelings. I'm just under...
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>Boss has been fucking with my hours and money on my check
>Confront her about
>bitch says "Well, business is slowing down."
>we've had two benefits and three orders for galas in the past two weeks yet we're slowing down
>come in to work today
>within forty minutes of my shift boss lady's cuck tells me "lel Seth it's slow, you can go home."

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>I take a few bottles of wine for the road
Yes, you are in trouble. You were in the legal right up until this point. You've fucked yourself over
>>
You screwed up OP
Your first mistake was arguing with her assistant rather than her herself and to also call her assistant names.
Your second mistake was getting up close to him and shoving out of the way and stealing bottles of wine
>>
I can see why they're cutting your hours to get you out of there: you're retarded.

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Hey, there /adv/.
A couple of years ago, I had one of my testicles removed, and the surgeon put a silicon prothesis inside the sack so it doesn't looks like I miss a ball.
Thing is, some months later, the prothesis disappeared. Dunno what happened to it. My family told me that I shouldn't worry about it (worst advice possible).
Nothing happened, fortunately. But now I feel worried as fuck. Should I go to the urologist and have that problem checked out?
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>>17833597

YES
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I don't have to tell you, you know the answer
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>>17833597
Ask /x/ for advice on communing with the spirit of your removed ball, then ask it for help in locating your new ball. Prosthetic or not, balls understand balls op.

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I've never been to a nightclub before.

Tomorrow I'm going to one in Fortitude Valley, Brisbane for a concert. Alone.

I'm a skinny short weak looking Asian guy who looks eighteen. Plus, I'm a tourist, not a local.

Am I going to be in much danger? Anything to look out for? Are nightclubs always this seedy as they depict on tv? Will trouble pop up?
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>>17833580
if you don't already know what "kind" of people hang out at that concert then YES you are in trouble
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>>17833580
...
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>>17833580
To elaborate, I'm not there to drink or get girls or anything of the sort. I'm just there for the music.

>>17833584
What do you mean, 'kind' of people?

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Hey /adv/, looking for help.
I was really depressed in Highschool and so were my friends, naturally. Since coming to college I've done well, I have a girlfriend, I'm involved on campus, passing as a stem major in a co-op. But my friends seem to be stuck in a rut, and they are too down on themselves to help me dig them out of it. How do you help people who won't help themselves? I feel like I'm leaving them behind.
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>how do you help people who won't help themselves?

you don't. you can't. you can offer them support if ever they decide they want to change their lives, but you can't let them bring you down.

it's not your fault that they're depressed. you aren't leaving them behind. they aren't following you.
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>>17833581
I guess you're right. I really want to help them out of their situation though. Are there any jobs that pay relatively well with a low skill set? I've been trying to talk them into serving
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>>17833601
my m8 fled a country to avoid service obligations. he would have killed himself in the army, especially because they put a gun in your hands.

but um. if there are jobs that are relatively well paid with a low skill set, would you not think they would be at capacity for employees?

there isn't an easy solution.

my m8, the same one, is living with me. he is studying at uni right now, a course that should get him permanent residency when he graduates. he has so many issues though - very depressed...
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Is it weird for an 18yo chick be with someone who has a daughter the same age as her?
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Wait I'm confused that literally makes no sense op
>>
Yes kinda fucked up.
>>
Yes, that's incredibly weird.
Stop dating men twice your fucking age. It never ends well for anybody.

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Would it be difficult to get my doctor to prescribe me HGH? I'm fairly sure poor nutrition stunted my growth (mentally ill parent. I was never allowed to eat much, weighed 52 kilos or 114.64 pounds at 18, and i'm around 4 inches shorter than all of my cousins on both sides)
Would HGH even help? I'm 19 now and my economic situation is vastly different, I have plenty of money for food but i'm fairly sure my growth spurts have ended.
Australia btw, not sure if doctors here are more or less cautious about prescriptions here than in the US/EU.
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Ask >>>/fit/
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>>17833537

Medfag here. It super WOULDN'T help with your growth, since that's also determined by when your bones close their epiphisis due to testosterone, and as you said, that spurt train is long gone. However, it may help you gain weight if you have trouble with that, as well as fight some symptoms of lack of collagen later in life (say, late 50s and such).
>>
>>17833792
At 19 and 4 months do you think it would be worth getting an x-ray at least to check if they've finished sealing? Or do you think at this age its a done deal
I'd rather not walking reminder of what I had to go through growing up so if there's even the smallest chance i'd like to take it.

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Hi /adv/ just a quick question
So im 17, and 4 days ago i got ticketed for speeding. I was going 47 in a 35 which i thought was a 45, but i wasnt paying attention. I have to appear in court for something about insurance, and this is my first ever ticket. Am i still able to drive or will i have to wait until the ticket is done with? Im in IL
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>>17833430
You're fine to drive. What's gonna go down is you'll go to the courthouse, wait in like line a while, and talk to the judge. You're less than 15 over and it's your first ticket (presumably) so the judge will likely let you pay a fine and turn it into a parking ticket so your insurance won't have to go up.

At least, that's how it works in NY state. I imagine it's pretty similar in other states
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>>17833468
Thank you so much for the response man
>>
>>17833476
Np dude I wish someone had told me how this shit worked the first time around cause I fucked up and paid it in the mail, ended up getting points

Courthouse's are the way to go cause judges just want to get the money for those fines. Dress nice, be respectful and apologetic when you talk to the judge. EZ

/adv is anyone else alone? I'm feeling extremely alone right now, partially because of finals but for w/e reason I have this lust for love. I've never had a girlfriend (18 years old) and never really kissed a girl (I have just way before high school) and am a virgin. Like I just want a gf really really bad, the sex doesn't even matter I just want to be with an intelligent girl that would rather cuddle in bed than go to a party, am I the only one who feels this? Do these females even exist? I have trouble with girls because I don't have any experience with...
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>>17833428
Persue friendships, if you can invade social circles you can find women who you can potentially date that you will have something in common with.

What sort of things interest you, what do you like to do?
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>>17833459
Play video games is one of the big ones but I don't really want to become part of that circle. In general, academics are important to me but I can really get along with anything. I usually like to talk about deep subjects like philosophy and religion but I also love to joke a lot.
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>>17833428
>I have trouble with girls because I don't have any experience with them at all
How did you think this would change?

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What's your ideal lifestyle, assuming it can be anything you wish

You wanna be a rockstar?
A pawn shop owner?
Fuck your way across the world?
Or maybe just "be happy"

Leave your comment in the section below
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I wish for more wishes.
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>>17833457
fucking top kek

i do just want to be happy and secure. i want a secure job that pays comfortably above minimum to survive/pay all my bills. even just like $200 extra a month of 100% disposable income is good. i want to own a house, for the security. not too tiny, but it doesn't have to be huge. at least 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, kitchen, living room. i want to own a car, also for the security. can go anywhere at any time, don't need to rely on public transport.

my dreams are humble but.. i could...
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>>17833488
oh, and also someone to share my life with obviously. not that i want someone around to be happy - it's the opposite kind of? i want to bring someone else happiness.

i have got a gf rn, and things are going great right now. i honestly could easily see us being together long term. so that part is possibly sorted.

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A girl approached me today, she was from my biology class.
She didn't state a specific reason for talking to me, she just started asking general questions and appeared a bit nervous at first.
We talked for about 40 minutes and she almost missed her class before some friends of hers saw her and reminded her.
We learned a fair bit about each other and she's the first person I met in college with such a similar background to mine.
I like her and I think she may like me and we agreed to meet up again to study on Monday.

I come here to ask you all how...
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>>17833404
don't be autistic and say anything weird

If it goes well on monday casually ask if she wants to go out for coffee or a movie or something
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>>17833404
Just act natural bro it seems like you guys are similar so don't ruin it by trying to be someone you're not
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>>17833421
I think I can do that.

>>17833429
Some of the awkward moments -were- spawned by me sorta putting on a mask instead of letting thoughts flow out and some of the better ones were from me acting natural. I'll try my best to be who I really am, thank you.

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Was at a party for 2 hours and couldn't ask my crush out. I talked to her a lot, but couldn't bring myself to ask. Any tips on what do do?
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Don't beat around the bush next time you see her. Bite the bullet!
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>>17833373
boy you gotta man up
>>
It's the worst feeling too. I need a way to move the conversation into asking her.

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Is it considered rape if both me and the other person are screaming?
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>>17833352
Lol thats called being a psychopath
>>
All things considered, no not really
>>
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>>17833352
Holy kek OP

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Holy fucking shit

I work on a military base. I lost my keys to several networking rooms around the base. I've spent the last 5 hours looking everywhere for my keys.

The only place left that they could be are in the last building I worked in, which I won't have access to until tomorrow.

What the fuck do I do? I'm pretty damn sure if I lose the keys I'll be terminated.
8 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Calm down and realize that you have already done all you can, and wait until tomorrow to go find your keys. Panicking won't solve anything. Take it as a hard lesson to learn, and don't forget important shit anymore.
>>
Can you request access tonight?
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>>17833344
Nope.

I plan on calling in sick tomorrow and going to the building and looking.

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I've done everything I can think of. I've taken up exercising more, I've gone to as many events as I can, I've tried online dating, I've made a ton of new friends. I tried online dating (terrible), I've messaged girls to ask them out when I have liked them. Haven't gotten more than a couple of first dates and I haven't got a girlfriend and I've been looking this seriously for just more than a year. I'm very confused and it's making my anxiety worse.

I'm 27, never had a girlfriend before, cute face, slightly...
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People can smell desperation ,you know? And it's a turn off.

You are so desperate for a gf that your whole identity revolves around it. You go to the gym but only for girls. You dress nice but only for girls. All of this is very nice but the real end goal was to give yourself confidence, which will in turn attract women. You don't do it only for the women.

So what the fuck are you without a girl? A girl wants to know that her man is a strong man who isn't clinging onto her.

Find out what you really like and establish your own identity.
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>>17833293
I have an identity. And I probably don't come off desperate to most girls because I don't act desperate.

Maybe my problem is more that I can't show I girl how much I want her because I'm always acting aloof.

But all I can think is... Acting more lovestruck maybe?

I would have thought I'd warrant a second date, even acting cool as I do.
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>>17833335
You don't act desperate but people can sense that you are desperate inside.

You are already doing a lot better than most people. You've actually gone on dates.

Ask people out in person and don't act more lovestruck. Act more interested, if you are interested. But don't stare at them or call them 'baby'. Just try and hang out with them more

also

>acting cool as i do

They can tell that you're insincere and faking it....
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I've got time to kill. Ask a 20-year old female college student anything.
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Nobody gives a fuck about what some boring college slut has to say.
Kys
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How many?
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>>17833275
how do i talk to a quiet grill from my class? girls are confusing af i swear lol. Like I see this girl around the halls sometimes and i say hi, she clearly saw me but puts her head down and only says hi when I say it. I haven't done anything for her to be mad at me for, what do?

What does /adv/ think about social work?

I'm currently considering a degree in social work due to one of my friends pointing out how good of a listener I am and how easy it is to talk to me. I've talked to a few other friends about it and so far they've all agreed I would be good for the job, one even saying I should have been in the field long before I asked her about it. They said I can remain logical in things while still taking into account everyone's feelings and seeing all sides to the issue.

Those kind words aside, I know there is more...
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>>17833271
Absoluteltpy firget it

Ahem

Absolutely forget it. If you're set on wading through other peoples horsecrap and self pity go for counselling in a private practice.
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>>17833389
Got it
Thanks anon
Is there any other job that can do good for people you can recommend?
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>>17833271
1. you must have liberal political views to make it thru college/grad school in social work

2, you said you're an invtrovert. get a clue. and you want to work with people 40/hrs a week ?

3. get computer training make $$ w/out lots of people interaction, then either donate $$ to social causes or.....

4. VOLUNTEER SOMEWHERE

5. go actually talk to people working in this field for several years & explain yourself & goals etc

Today we found out that we have a spy watching us in our apartment.

We moved into an apartment 3 months ago. We live in a large city, where no one knows their neighbours. This being said, the woman who lives beside us would often call out to us and ask us questions about our apartment.

An example: We live on the ground floor, and people have thrown so much junk on our patio that ants had started to gather. So we put down some baby powder. This woman called out to us one day, acting light hearted, and said "haha what is that powder? Why is it there?"...
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>>17833246
Forgot to explain;

We declared the cat on our reference but *apparently* the landlord didn't personally see the reference, so it counts as a "contract breaking animal"
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>>17833246
Have you spoken to the landlord? Did you complain about the people, I'm assuming other tenants, tossing garbage onto the patio? If they knew about the cat, why does it matter?
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Gossiping isn't illegal.

>We're literally being spied on
No you're not. You're telling someone something, who's sharing that information with someone else, who's sharing that information with someone else. That's not spying.

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So I've never been to a dry cleaners and need my suit cleaned for an interview. What exactly do i ask for?

Sorry for being retarded. I know how to do my laundry and stuff. I've just never been to a dry cleaners.

>pic related
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>hello, I have a suit to be drycleaned
>I need it back before [date] will that be a problem?
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>>17834017
arent there options and such?
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>>17834022
amount of starch used

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So i had this in both shoulders and i don't know wtf is, help me pls, what is and what should i do to get that away from my skin, my fave is grassy but not that ugly, any products to skin care?
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>>17833233
bump
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>>17833233
The photo is bad, can't tell what you're talking about, all I can see is some acne, hair and moles.
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>>17833251
The acné and the moles, have months with that, they don't wanna go away


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