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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 425. page
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I'm halfway through a restaurant management course, and I've realized it's not really what I want to do. what I want to do is hairstyling. The thing is it's pretty shitty pay. After the course I'd actually be starting at $3/hr less than what I was getting at my job BEFORE the course I'm in now.
If I finish the management course, then went into hairstyling I'd be paying off 3 years of student loans on basically minimum wage.
If I quit now I'd save myself the extra year of loans, but wouldn't have much to fall back on if I can't...
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What is that?
>>
Why do you "love" "doing hair"? Is it really rational?
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>>17537767

Finish what you start. You can start hairstyling when your debts are paid off, and you won't have to feel that pay decrease if you budget accordingly and focus on paying off your debt while working as a restaurant manager.

>[I] wouldn't have much to fall back on if I can't make it as a stylist

Considering you just took on a great deal of debt, it doesn't sound like a wise decision.

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Okay so I fucked up and I need your advice. I broke up with my gf a week ago, cut communications for the next few days, then met up with her yesterday, mainly to give her back the stuff that she left at my place. We had a few drinks, she tried to convince me to give the relationship another go, I told her repeatedly that however much I wanted this to work out, it didn't and it won't, then she asked me if I could sleep at her place... One thing led to another and we had sex eventually. This morning, just as I got out of bed to leave for work, she asked me what'll...
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>>17537729

You fucked up your break-up. Do you actually want to break up? What you need to do is have another conversation with her. You fucked her again, so you can't just continue with the "cut-all-ties" schtick.
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>>17537737
Yeah, I do want to break up with her: she was suffocating me, got jealous when I would spend my time with friends or at home with my family instead of being with her (even though we spent at least 4 nights a week together), didn't want to understand the concept of "the need for personal space", hated the fact that I would enjoy browsing 4chan in my spare time, cost me a lot of money (for example, we always had to eat out because she can't cook, and we went on vacations abroad four times in a year,...
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>>17537729
Oh my fucking God.
You can find someone steaming hot without wanting to have a relatio ship with them, right ?
Be clear and honest with her : you still find her hot enough to have somd fun with her, but you aren't compatible on any other levels. Period.

It's up to her if she wants to go on this way, but I do recognize myself in the girl you described (sadly) and went with a fwb kind of relationship with my ex. You'll have both your physical needs cover, and it honestly is a ton of fun !

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I fell for the psychedelic propaganda

"They're harmless, so much safer than beer or cigarettes. It's mind expanding and it will show you thinks you never imagined. It's unlike anything, it's a necessary part of the human experience, it's a crime that it's illegal and everyone should try it"

Well it's not for me, everyone takes a risk. You don't know how it will end up for you. I still feel weird, I developed moderate anxiety after taking it a few times, and it has worsened after smoking more weed lately. I'm...
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>>17537727
Was it fun though? I think that's why most people do them, and it's why i probably would if offered
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>>17537727
These are REAL negative effects, this isn't anti-drug propaganda

http://www.drugfreeworld.org/drugfacts/lsd/the-harmful-effects-of-lsd.html

-Delusions
-Visual hallucinations
-An artificial sense of euphoria or certainty
-Distortion of one’s sense of time and identity
-Impaired depth perception
-Impaired time perception, distorted perception of the size and shape of objects, movements, color, sounds, touch and the user’s own body image
-Severe, terrifying thoughts and feelings
-Fear of losing control
-Panic attacks
-Flashbacks, or a recurrence of the LSD trip, often without warning long after taking LSD
-Severe depression or psychosis

Please, only do these if you are a happy social person with a fine life already who just wants to augment it. Yeah the great experiences are beautiful, enhanced empathy and feelings of love and connectedness, BEAUTIFULLY enhanced perception of music and art. But the negatives are so bad it's legitimately not worth it

Psychedelics increase the amplitude of the wave that is your life. Higher highs, lower lows - but guess what, it deepens your lows more than it increases your highs

Stay stable, stay drug free, I'm dead serious. Yeah maybe I'm just pathetic and can't handle bad trips, but there are millions of people out there who this advice applies to. I want to go cry, the bad trips I've had are so fucking bad and they're stuck with me. I wouldn't wish them on my worse enemy

"Flashbacks" are FUCKING REAL okay it's just that the term is bad. They are just manifestations of increased anxiety upon experiencing something that reminds you of a bad trip

Ever have a bad trip and go hide under your bed to avoid the evil spirits? You MAY have a flashback and experience a sense of dread any time you look under your bed now. It will go away eventually but it's still unpleasant. And this can apply to normal everyday objects

What's horrible is when it applies to things you used to love.
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>>17537736
tl;dr

Don't do drugs kids especially psychedelics, and especially in large doses and without proper preparation

The highs are high, but the lows have the potential to be literally lower than you could possibly imagine. Nightmares you could never have conceived of before they happen to you.

Your mind expands, but guess what - sometimes you don't want it to expand into those dark corners. Sometimes you WANT to be able to ignore reality and just life your life. Some realities are unpleasant....
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I got drunk and got dicked by a guy I didn't particularly like nor want to get fucked by. It didn't hurt and I barely remember it, I don't give a shit, but my ex heard about it and he's fucking livid, insisting I should tell the police and pull rape charges.

I don't recall protesting to being fucked, even thought I thought we'd just agreed he'd let me crash on his couch before he started goading me towards the bed.

I told my ex that it doesn't matter to me, and it wasn't that different from all the times I've let...
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These b8 threads are getting old.
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>>17537653

bait

Wait, are you that tranny that comes here a lot?
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If this is bait, it's the first time i've seen it.

There's not really much you can do about your dumbass ex, other than warn the dude to watch his back.

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I fucking hate chemistry. I learned the basics two years ago and now I'm taking AP. I'm so lost looking at the syllabus. I'm totally fucked. I'm gonna be behind everyone.

The fuck do I do
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Honestly? Knuckle down and study hard. If I did it you can do it, and AP chem is slower paced than Chem 1 and Chem 2.
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>>17537648
It sounds easier than it is. Every time I look at the summer problem sets I get so lost, and my friends' explanation make no sense. Whenever I google it, I just see stuff that seems so basic to me, and makes total sense. When I go to do the problem, I'm fucked.
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>>17537654

Transfer out of the class.

Explain that you're overwhelmed, and go to honors or whatever. Or just fucking go to class and work hard.

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Hey everyone,

I've been seeing this girl on and off for a long time.

Recently we have been on for almost a year. She has a drinking problem, and when she would get shit faced she would text other dudes. I caught her, and then we decided to we needed sometime to think about our choices. If we're making the right choice having a relationship. We decided to stay exclusive while we take time to think about it.

I texted her today and she says since she has not been with me she is a lot less stressed out. Shes avoiding having conversations with me. She...
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Dude fucking cut ties with her. If she thinks things are "too hard" than she needs a re-evaluation of how life works and a re-evaluation of if alcohol is even worth it. This bitch is delusional you need to see a different girl
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>>17537626

Bump. Anyone else got advise?
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>>17537626

Try to have a real conversation about why it is hard and why she feels stressed around you. We can't answer that for you. Remember that you have to commit yourself to an HONEST conversation.

Im going to a party later this week where everyone's going be wasted on Ecstasy. I want to take it too, but this would be my first time. I know pretty much all the people that are going to be there, so i dont want to embarass myself.. Any advise on how I can not freak out, get laid, and just in general have a good time? Im not a *complete* social idiot but I've got zero experience w/ mdma or people on it.. Thanks
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Just don't even go to the party. If someone needs drugs to have a good time then it's nor really a party is it? Just a bunch of bums being delusional
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>>17537676
Ehhh, the principle is not entirely solid, but the advice for this party is. If you don't have a plan or don't think it's safe, and if you're not very interested in taking mdma, don't go.

You don't indeed need any substances to have a good time, but it doesn't mean you can't have a reasonable amount of fun with them. That being said, you don't need a full blown out hard schedule 1 drug to feel good.
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>>17537676
>>17537688
Yes, you don't need any substance to have a good time but good company, but there's nothing wrong with a shared drug experience. Adults partake in moderation friend. Its not that I'm afraid at all, or that anyone is pressuring me. I just wanted the advise of people that have done it before.. What should I expect to see??I've wanted to take MDMA for a while now so I just want to maximize this experience!

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I am a penniless NEET mustering up the willpower to finish college. For some inexplicable reason I am like catnip for young female professionals with a high degree of education who come from affluent backgrounds. I have even had an outright marriage proposal involving becoming heir to a girl's father's business. This has held true with both American and foreign women.

I am unable to wrap my head around this. You might say "good problems anon hurr hurr", but not really. To me it feels more like women see me as a man that they can mold into some ideal...
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bamp
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>>17537616
I've been in the same position. Basically, you are probably a very stable and reasonable guy, the kind that is not going to randomly blow a million dollars on hookers and blow, get arrested, and fuck up his life.
This makes you a safe bet for rich girls, since their daddies will approve of you.
They're not really looking for a soul mate, more of a partner. The business kind. And they think you fit the bill pretty well.
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fuck you handsome muppet
get acid splashed in your face

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I moved from a Scandinavian country to Australia some months back. Back home, I lived in the capital. I never had any issues finding men to date and every time I went out, I talked with several new guys. This despite the fact that Scandinavian men in general are of high quality.

Here in Australia however no man has even talked to me yet. I wonder why is that so that no man finds me appealing here, even though I'm able to date handsome men back home.
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>>17537582
if youre in syd ill take you out. Most likely your attractiveness is intimidating
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How tall are you? If you're taller than the average guy - or if you look taller than them when wearing heels and wear them a lot - maybe you're intimidating them. Other than that it might just be that there are different norms you haven't picked up on yet that might make the process to finding a boyfriend somewhat different from what you're used to (maybe you're coming on too strong, not strong enough, maybe you're trying to meet men in the wrong places, or meeting them too passively - you no longer have a circle of friends to reliably meet people through).
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>>17537582
>I wonder why is that so that no man finds me appealing here
post pics bby

i feel like if i'm pushed too hard in anyway to do something new or hard i will erupt and ether hurt myself or other people and or destroy things.

I'm so afraid of this that i chose to not do anything and be neet.

What do i do?
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>>17537580
Anxiety meds.
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Realize that won't happen. Convince yourself logically that it's unlikely.

If you can't control your emotions at all, go talk to a therapist.
Pills help but they're a temporary solution, you'll need a long-term fix.
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Why do you respond to these illogical feelings?
You can't just assume this stuff without a basis therefore your fears are irrational and you have to recognize this

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I'm no longer attracted to 3D women. 2D is the only thing that does it for me anymore. What the fuck do I do?

>inb4 bait

This isn't bait. I'm completely fucking serious right now
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No one is really that attracted to the the partners they end up marrying. Everyone settles.
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Quit jerking to 2d women.
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Don't masturbate or look at -ANY- porn for a few weeks. I do this any time my porn habits get too "extreme".

What ends up happening is that I start to be more sensitive to arousal. A women with nice legs is suddenly the hottest thing in the world. The slightest bit of cleavage or tight pants and I start to feel like I'm a teenager again.

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I'm 31. Can the right medication and/or therapy turn me into a normie?
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>>17537558
Try a lobotomy
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>>17537558
it's called gensokyo, pic related.
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>>17537558

Booze!

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Alright I really like this girl, but I don't know what's going on with her. I need an outsider to analyze this situation. This is a girl who works for the same company as me, though we don't actually work shifts together at the same time. I did meet her through work though.

We started talking about work related things and now talk about a bit more such as what we want to do next with school/career stuff etc and just recently began talking about what we do and where we go out and stuff. I can't tell if she's interested. I'll make a list of...
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it's her boyfriend
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>>17537564
that's absolutely the worst thing I want to hear
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You could just ask her?

Or ask her out and find out.

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So theres this girl I really like, but shes out of my league. I'm thinking of getting her name tattooed on my dick. It's a pretty good size so I think I can fit both her first and last name if I use 12 pt font or something. Sound like a good idea?
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any particular reason?
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>>17537541

Depends on the font?
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>>17537541
Use comic sans.

Also how are you planning on keeping an erection through the pain long enough for this?

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My ex cheated on me a lot, finally yesterday he dumped me and was already trying to get a new girlfriend. I messaged this girl and said that he was with me when he started dating her too. She hasn't seen the message yet, should I try to salvage the situation? I could say I lied. But the ex is a cheater, he cheated on me and his ex too but he could be faithful to the new girl (I doubt it though). He is 100% still a liar since he lied he was single. They have been dating for a week and she was just the first girl to answer him on a dating site.
What to do?
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Don't do anything else. That was petty, but fuck him, he's a cheater anyway.

Delete her number, block his and move on.
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>>17537495
What to do when she answers me though? Or maybe she won't see the message, I sent it on Facebook.
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Halp

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Am I a shit person for taking advantage of a literal retarded hooker?

Aside from doing every disgusting thing to her including licking my asshole, I also pay her shorter than she asks: I pay 60$ and she asks for 80$. I usually fuck her throat and then the ass.

I've been there only twice but I have considered paying even less since she is too retarded to count money. On the other hand I don't want the pimp (whom she has for sure because no one that retarded goes into the business by themselves) to notice and someday beat me up.

I've considered...
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Your morals are clearly very loose so skys the limit bro anything short of straight murder is A-OK
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>>17537474
If she's short on money the pimp will probably beat her

So there's that
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>>17537490
she talks directly to the customer so I'd say he (if he exists) doesn't know how many people she fucked that day.

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If I can't get a perfect 6/10 artsy hipster girl who likes death grips to love me, literally why should I try to be successful in life?
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>>17537448
Try doing it for that 6/10 artsy hipster girl
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>>17537467
>No death grips

Dropped.
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>>17537467
>>17537713

Misread your post.

Do it for that reason, OP. Be successful so that, when the day comes, you'll be completely ready for her.

>girl I had a crush on in high school
>asked her to go to a movie with me
>get curved

Just broke up with my gf and this other girl also goes to my college, should I try and DM her or is it a horrible idea

she already said no once, and she's japanese and my ex was vietnamese and they know each other so honestly I'm probably going to get rejected AND thought of as a yellow fever creep, etc.

talk me out of this
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>>17537447

Can a hip millennial tell me what "get curved" means so I can give actual advice?
>>
Please op dont do it, you will get curved and she will most likely talk about it, although if you really want to do it and you shouldn't, wait a while time will help a little bit
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>should I try to dm her
>Dungeon Master her

What?

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>former neet
>mum threatens to kill me if I don't get my shit together
>attempt to go to a driving school, start walking groceries to the house, clean more often, etc
>gets agitated that I'm not doing things the way she likes and then threatens to kill me again
>doings things her way is to mindlessly rely on family, which just leads to more trouble
>now 19 and can't drive or...
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>>17537395
>How do you deal with a violent, controlling family
You leave it. Any way that you can.
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>>17537395
>also 19
>first job laid me off three days ago
>can't drive and can only afford one month of rent
I was gonna ask /adv/ to see if anyone knows how to work from home as a beginner, because I need cash but I have no car to get it.
>>
>>17537427
How'd you get employed? I've just been firing out applications online so far.
>>17537407
you sound like you speak from experience

Hey /ADV/
I feel like a boring fuck, I get bored easily talking to people and just I don't have fun in general. My sense of humor is kind of shitty, anyway I can not be a boring shit or improve or is it social skills ?
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I meant to say I don't want to be a boring shit, but how can I improve?
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>>17537372
>>17537369
What makes you laugh or spikes your interest?

Speaking to people is like any skill it needs experience, once you are comfortable around people and have them laughing and eating out your hand it becomes enjoyable you can then open up and find them amusing. You sound closed off.
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>>17537408
Satire makes me laugh a lot, mean humor, dark humor, witty dry humor. Anything that surprises me really.
I like Acting, stand up comedy, music, anime spikes my interests, video gaming.
Long story short about being closed off, I have trouble of making witty or fun remarks when I use to talk to people. People have left me before and I'm kind of an only child along side only having one parent and almost no other family. So I felt lonely all the time, I taught myself to filter my words. I won't even...
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I know this is a stupid question, but I legit can't find a better person to hang out and relate to other than myself. They say opposites attract, but that doesn't make any sense. All you're gonna do is not talk to each other because you don't have anything in common.
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>>17537305

No one can be exactly like you. And you already have 100% of your own interests and experiences. If you love yourself that much, get a rib taken out so you can suck your own cock.
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>>17537305
It's better to be alone. Find you a s/o and keep a few people around just in case you need a little help every now and then.
>>
>>17537305

WOW ONE SAYING BASED ON MICROSCOPIC SCIENCE ISNT UNIVERSALLY APPLICABLE TO ROMANTIC RELATIONS? YOU MEAN ITS JUST SOMETHING PEOPLE SAY TO EXPLAIN AWAY WHY SOME PEOPLE WITH VAST DIFFERENCES FALL IN LOVE DESPITE THE AFOREMENTIONED ISSUE?

seriously wahts the problem here? if you are happy being independent great. if you are happy being with someone like you, great. if you can manage to make it work with an 'opposite', do that.

whats the actual issue here?

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25f here. Still a virgin. Not kissless, but I'm beginning to think I'm just not attractive to guys. Idk why. I try to be interested in what they're doing and I do stuff of my own, but I never seem to find one that wants to spend time with me. What am I doing wrong, /adv/? I'm slightly overweight, wear glasses, not even an 8, but I like to think I look cute.
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pls be my gf
>>
Do you have a picture?
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>>17537325
no she's mine I want her

I will be taking a girl on a date to a a thrift store pretty soon. My excuse for asking is to garner some old clothes to use as costumes in our play. My question is, how can I make it enjoyable for her, enough to open the possibility for a more serious date in the future and maybe a potential relationship? This occasion could be a "sneak peek" into what a relationship with me would be like, so she needs to enjoy it. I'm talking should I make her follow me around in the store while we look together, sometimes picking out funny things and getting into shannanigans or what?
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>>17537258
Just be like while were out lets get something to eat, but be a little more subtle about it, like oh im hungry how about you?
>>
this sounds like what i do with my high school friends in reverse tbqh

you should be fine, good luck
>>
>>17537264
I think this is a good idea.

Honestly OP, it sounds like you did pretty well. Did you make it explicit to her that the two of you are going on a date to the thrift store, or, on paper at least, are the two of you just hanging out?

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I made a suicide pact on here last month and am counting down my last week. Still choosing method whats the best way to kill yourself with no pain no mess no drama? My last resort would be using a gun. Is it painful or is it lights out instantly? I've also considered drowning I hear once you get past the panic its quite peaceful.
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are you that desperate for attention... What the fuck is so bad in you life?
>>
stand on the edge of a tall beautiful mountain and poof yourself in the head with a big gun.
>>
fertilizer bomb

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Sup /adv/,

Current situation: Been dating this Japanese girl for a little over a year. She's visited me twice, I've visited her 3 times and we talk regularly over LINE / gtalk / email.

I think I'm in love. I can't stop thinking about her. Long distance relationship is hard though.
Should I move to Japan? I presently work a remote job and I've worked remotely while in Japan recently - its not that hard. Problem is, don't you need to be a citizen? If I'm a remote employee, I don't have a work visa.

Then there's...
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>>17537210
I vote Y

also you cant buy shit gajin you have to marry her
>>
I moved to Japan 4 years ago and have been living in Tokyo. You don't need a car unless you live in the countryside and rent isn't that expensive compared to western cities. You don't need to buy a house.

You need a bachelor's degree to get a work visa sponsored by a company in Japan.
>>
Ask her first.

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How do you befriend people with similar interests
You think it be easy but it never is . It's always
>I like thing
>me too
And I want to stop taking to them . How do you do it adv?
20 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
It's the same for me. The clincher is always appearance.

What do you like? Maybe we can be friends.
>>
>>17537196
Art
Uhh comics I think
Animation in general really
Random games
Nothing else
:/
>>
>>17537203
Are you cute?

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Hey /adv/, is it possible for a person to drastically change in a month or two?
16 replies and 4 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>17537181
two months on a meth addiction could change you lots.
>>
>>17537181
You can dramatically change right now
>>
Of course it is.
You'll probably need something to trigger you though otherwise it will be difficult.

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I am basically just looking for some attention.

As of late I've been feeling the need of talking with somebody but I haven't been able to.

I am struggling with everything I have to do even tho the situation I am in is not even what you would call complicated. I received the easy treatment in life, I dont have a job, just go to college and things are crumbling down again.

Months ago my general goal was to get proficient at studying, I stablished a schedule that I swore to keep up with everyday, giving at least 50 minutes to each topic listed...
Comment too long. Click here to view the full text.
11 replies and 5 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
>>17537143
Order some papa johns online

Stream The Matrix

Then pretend you're Neo from now on; seriously do it

t. werks for me
>>
join the club xD they say im an attention whore, but im the only one who knows im here most of the time. If i wanted attention I would've sought it from another living human being and make a scene. Not to a screen in bum fuck egypt
>>
>>17537143
>can't handle the noises, the screams, the constant talk at the library.
Neither can i, that's why i study at home

And remember that you don't need to accomplish great things (yet), you're in college to get your damn degree not to be some goddamn hero

Remember that nobody's really got things sorted out
We all just figure it out as we go along
We run into an obstacle, then figure out how to get around it
Run into a problem, figure out...
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Hey /adv/, other than women and money (which are non-specific), what is your goal in life? What do you hope to achieve with the time you have on this earth?

I've recently become financially stable for the first time in my life, and I'm at a loss.
10 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17537078
Wisdom and bodily strength (at least for a few decades).
>>
Knowledge and power.

But since knowledge IS power, then all I want it knowledge.
>>
>>17537078
Used to be happiness but i don't know anymore

/adv/ how do I know if I'm actually lesbian or am just missing something in my life because I was raised by a single father? My ex-girlfriend accused me of this a month ago and I keep thinking about it.

Every woman I'm interested in is older than me, like in their 30s/early 40s. They make me feel secure and at peace but I don't know if what I'm feeling is actual romantic attraction. It feels like it but I don't know.
8 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Just see if you can picture yourself with a guy, and which of the two feels more natural. That worked for me.
>>
>>17537106
I definitely don't think I'm attracted to men, I never have been... But the thing is I'm not sure if I'm attracted to women either? I don't enjoy the sex and it is a regular cause of friction in my relationships. I do think women are amazing and beautiful and I love being with them and melting into their arms in a hug or a cuddle but I don't look at lesbian porn or anything like that. I feel like a weirdo I guess.
>>
Sleep with a man.

I considered myself gay until I was 21, had a couple year + serious relationships with guys. After a breakup I was emotionally exhausted and on a whim went out with a girl, and now I consider myself pretty much straight.


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