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I'm starting to drink to avoid the pain of being alone.

I'm dealing with the of the women I love disappearing from my life. Left without a word.

Dealing with the fact I threw her away for someone who I now hate.

My mental state is slowly deteriorating. Over the course of the last few year because of this. Turning into mood swings and depression.

I can't even get close to other people because I'm so focused on the thoughts of her and my mistakes.

Should I just drown myself in liquor and press on? Because I consider myself a pretty emotionally resilient and stable guy. Generally peacefull and happy upstairs. But this is destroying me.
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Supposedly, there's something like some religious cult that picks and chooses who it wants to save called AA that you could try.
>>
everyone makes mistakes and has regrets, it's a fundamental part of being human

learn from your mistakes and move on, don't wallow in your regret and try to turn back the clock because you can't. You say you threw a woman you loved away for someone you hate, ok well that sucks, but this woman you were in a relationship with is not the only woman on the planet worth loving, there will be others.
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>>17517664
Distract yourself. Do something to break your obsessive thinking and you won't need liquor. It could be something as simple as going to the movies a lot, or working out at a gym.

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I don't know why, but I feel the need to keep posting this since I'm not getting many clear cut answers here.

>Girl rejected me Mid-May
>Told me she wasn't able to "have feelings for someone right now" since she was "on emotional tilt" cause her boyfriend cheated on her around the beginning of March.
>Not entirely bullshit cause she rejected like 3 other guys and asked me for help rejecting another one at this point
>I...
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>>17517657
One of the many differences between men and women is that women sincerely and innocently believe they can reject a romantic relationship and still remain friends, while men tend to get so hurt that they want to break off all contact.

She's not deliberately tormenting you, nor is she trying to start something romantic. As foreign as the thinking is to you, she simply feels "Well, I turned him down, but that's no reason we can't be friends."

If you can handle that level with her,...
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>>17517715

Yeah but like... why now?

I'd understand that she wants to be friends, she emphasized that, but fuck it's been 3 entire months with next to no contact with each other.

Why is she fucking messaging me now? She had the entire fucking summer vacation to talk to me, but she chooses the last week to torment me? Whyyyy...

Sorry, this is semi venting. Would still appreciate some insight as to why it's been 3 months with no contact and then her randomly messaging me.
>>
One last bump, really need help.

The 3 months no contact is just fucking with me.

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How do you fuck someone in the ass, what about poop?
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>>17517647
You use a condom, lube, and go slow.
Are you a Mormon?
>>
>>17517656
No I'm not Mormon why would you ask that
>>
any combination of the following:

you shit an hour or so before you fuck, you take fiber supplements so you know that when you empty your bowels they're completely empty, you use an enema repeatedly until the water runs clear, you use condoms lube and go slow

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I feel really sad and lonely because I have no girl friends whatsoever. I have friends but they're all guys and they are all friends of my boyfriend and they don't like to hang out anyways. I try really hard to make friends that are girls, even if it's online. And it feels like it's impossible because they either don't want to talk much about anything, they start hating me for no reason, or they just drift away. It makes me feel awful because I don't like being the girl who has nothing but guy friends. It's even putting a strain on my relationship...
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>>17517646
>who wouldn't be mean to me and would actually want to hang out with me
sorry, but that's a guy
>>
Same
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>>17517649
No I'm a girl.
Girls want other girls to hang out with them fyi. And girls are especially mean to eachother... It's been since high school (3 years) since I last had a female friend.

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Good morning /adv/, first-time posting here in awhile.

(TL;DR - Is "buying" a spouse that bad of an idea?)

I'm in my mid-twenties, and have spent most of my young adult life working to build on both my academics and finances. Unfortunately, this has left me very little room to create a lasting bond with someone special. Two of my closest friends are set to be married by the end of this year, whereas it's been several years since I ever held some semblance of kinship between another person. I took a stab at Tinder and OKCupid, but I was disheartened...
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you really think marrying a stranger is going to make you happy? you're an idiot
>>
Have you considered
>you'll be judged
>you'll probably feel embarrassed about it
>you'll be exploited
>she won't make you happy
>you might get scammed
>what if she runs as soon as she gets permanent resident status
Etc. There's a reason it's really not that common
>>
>>17517695
Quite right. Love is for fools.

You've tempted fate by courting loneliness and now you want to see fortune swing.

You behold a catalogue of willing brides. I don't know what stops you from picking your favorite and going with it, I truly do not. Truly.

And hell, if you're wealthy enough to order out for a bride, you're wealthy enough to sic a PI on the case when she goes out for unplanned errands. I mean, come on. Do I have money wrong?

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I need to study non-stop like an animal, so I can get a shot going out my third-fucking-shitty-country and have a life.

I don't care about my life, only my grades matter. I want to study so hard I get convulsions. Please, help. Ideas of cronograms, apps to help organization, methods of study (I'm a medical student), anything is very welcomed.

I'm alredy taking Ritalin to improve performance.
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meditate for 666 seconds once a day. the clarity you'll achieve is outstanding.
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>>17517623
Have you ever tried meducation?
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>>17517631
Nope, what's that?

20 year old virgin here. been dating this girl for over a year and want to have sex, she's into it, we both feel ready. We both live with our parents. Where can we have sex where it can be enjoyable and also where we don't get caught? I only really want to experience it if I can do it regularly. Should we just give up and wait until we move in together?
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Hotels are made for a reason

Im guessing you're under 18

Car seats recline all the way back for a reason

If you don't have a car you aren't ready for sex.
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>>17517618
What parent is so involved in your life that you can't bang in your house? Wtf, are you still a child or something? 20 fucking years old and your parents aren't okay with you having sex? "Get caught"? Would your parents actually punish you, a supposed 20 year old, for having sex?

What 20 year old doesn't have enough money to rent a room at a hotel for one night? What the fuck man? What the fuck?

This has got to be a troll thread. Either you are trolling, or lying about your age.
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>>17517643
>What parent is so involved in your life that you can't bang in your house? Wtf, are you still a child or something? 20 fucking years old and your parents aren't okay with you having sex? "Get caught"? Would your parents actually punish you, a supposed 20 year old, for having sex?
Because it's weird for parents to know that their child has sex under their roof

>What 20 year old doesn't have enough money to rent a room at...
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I'm kind of worried that my gf is stressing too much about school. Her volleyball coach made all these stupid rules about who she can study with and now she's studying like 5 hours a day. Sometimes twice a day or more going over there. She gets really crabby if she can't go study and she's always exhausted afterwards from working so hard. is it stupid of me to be worried about her stress levels?
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>>17517601
Fuck off and watch her succeed, you little shitcunt. It is a cult practice to manipulate those under you and to control who they're friends with. Coach knows better than your psychic leech ass, so fuck off and watch the cunt win.
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>>17517606
I'm not trying to control her, I'm trying to be supportive. Hence my concern. I want her to succeed.
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>>17517601
Oh my God! My girlfriend is studying! How can I save her from this awful fate?

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how to break the ice?
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>>17517590
quit being a bitch
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>>17517590
with fire
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>>17517593
So
"Hey, so we matched on tinder, which means you think Im attractive, and I think you're pretty cute, so do you want to come over to my place and have sex or something?"

Is that ok?

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Started taking naps in the afternoon since Monday. Sometimes they last 2 hours, sometimes 5 or more. I just get sleepy at that time.

Invariably, I keep waking up from wet dreams, and it's semi annoying. I'm too tired to fap right beforehand, but I also don't want this to happen if I fall asleep at school or somewhere public.

Maybe my libido has just increased somehow? I'm getting more raging bomers at random times in the day, to the point where it hurts. Somehow I thought this shit would stop when I finished being a teenager but apparently...
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Unfuck your sleep schedule. Go to bed before midnight, set an alarm for 7:00 AM, and fap before / after sleeping if you have to.
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>>17517586
Thing is I do wake up at 7 am most days. By 7 pm though I feel tired again.
>>
Help pls, googling this gets me nofap threads, and I'm just trying to avoid having a wet crotch in public

We were dating for 2 months. She's from 300 miles away, studying in my city. She gave me the login and password from her social network long time ago. After a recent fight she changed the pass. I tried a couple of similar passwords I succeeded - found out she's dating another guy. I was shocked. So all the time when she told me that it's her mom that calls her and demands her to be at home at 9 pm - it was actually him. It was him who called during our sex so she jumped off me and talked to him, telling me that it's her mom. Jesus
So I was just an affair...
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They'll probably kill you desu.
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>>17517562
Seems like you don't stand to gain much by pursuing the contest. Dump her.
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>>17517562
Bring your own friends for an all out brawl

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So, /adv/ I have a question. I'm going to be 21 in December, and I'm starting to look into going to college. Yes, I will be a Freshman. I already know that CC will probably be my best bet then just transfer out, so I'd like to just state that before I continue.

Anyway, I did absolute shit in High School. Like graduating at the bottom of my class shit. My grades ranged anywhere between solid A+'s to incompletes. I was in various CP classes, and some Honor classes only because it was a small school and the teachers and counselors knew that I wasn't...
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>>17517546
Continued

Also, yes, my family is dirt poor... and no they cannot help me in anyway besides giving proof that my father or mother currently has no income on the FAFSA. Would it also be an advantage if I were or were not a minority? I feel as if I were swarthy it'd help me even more.
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>>17517550
dude, you had it right when you said you were gonna go to CC and make a fresh start then transfer over to a four year

do that, it's there exactly for people in your situation
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>>17517546
Professor writing here.

Things are not as bleak as you may feel. First of all, you are not alone. Colleges are used to encountering people who screwed up as teenagers and are now getting their act together, and they are sympathetic and supportive.

Second, your age is not an issue. College isn't just for 18 year olds any more, and probably at least 25% of the undergrads will actually be older than you (and thus graduating in your mid-20s won't be unusual or a handicap).

Now, your biggest...
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Anyone else here find the concept of communicating to people through only hints and signals to be so ungodly offensive?

It's just so dishonest, condescending, and deceitful; and makes it really difficulty to listen to pretty much anybody speak and trust what they're saying at face value. It, understandably, leaves one to be not only suspicious of people in general, but also judge them harshly over the most insignificant things.

I also find it prejudice to assume that *anyone* would be able to read your hints and signal. Because they're probably not from a race, culture, or upbringing that recognises said cues. The only way I see that working is if you two have already known each other.

What's a good way to react to somebody you can tell isn't being upfront and direct with their communication? I'm thinking of just flat-out ignoring their cues until they are clear and solid with whatever if it is they're trying to convey. Or calling them out on it, and making it heard that this means of communication will not be respected, is not acceptable, is flat-out inexcusable, and will not be taken wholeheartedly.
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>>17517516
Communication is mostly body language and tone, OP. You have to learn to pick up on these signals.
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>>17517516
>I'm thinking of just flat-out ignoring their cues until they are clear and solid with whatever if it is they're trying to convey. Or calling them out on it, and making it heard that this means of communication will not be respected, is not acceptable, is flat-out inexcusable, and will not be taken wholeheartedly.
That's called autism honey.

Communication is more than what people speak. It's a lot more complex and involves things like body language. If you start 'calling people out' on communicating in a more complex way than you can handle, you're just going to alienate yourself.
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>>17517516
A person being sly about their communication has more to not say than say. You can safely disregard statements made without clear intent, at least.

I need help.

I need to hook up with a girl soon or I'm gonna lose it.

My job sucks as it is and I literally have no money for hookers. Strippers yeah, but only for literally 5 minutes of attention.

I'm seriously going to turn 28 soon and considering suicide. I can't fucking keep trying and getting forever rejected.
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>>17517493
I fucking know your feel man. I'm 26 and in the same boat. I just don't connect with women like normal people. I've thought a lot about hiring a prostitute, but really I don't think what either of us want is it? I know for me, I want to feel accepted by women and sex is a symbol of that. Acceptance is an emotional action taken by someone else willingly. You can't buy it, it will probably only make it worse. The worst part about this feel is it's out of our control ultimately. Virginity...
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>>17517694
Being poor in a capitalist nation is a major catch 22 due to media, essentially. You're old enough to buy girls drinks in a bar, the only legal form of rape available, so why not give that a go if you still have no pride?
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>>17517702

Like I said, will that actually give me what I need? I doubt it. The lack of having my penis inside someone isn't the problem, it's the lack of any real emotional satisfaction of being accepted by the opposite gender in an intimate way that causes the bad feels, in the same way as buying a prostitute would be unfulfilling, getting a girl hammered and fucking her also would be unfulfilling.

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I'm on vacation, and I got this gorgeous singer's number. I'm here for the week for a bachelor party. She's flatly incredible. I'm here in town until Monday.

I'll take any and all ideas, but should I try to start with texting her, or just call her? If I call her, when?
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>>17517480
anytime you want, m8, i'm sure you'd be placed in the waitlist.
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>>17517480
Why are you asking 4chan instead of your friends?
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>>17517490
>friends
lol

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I want to fuck a friend but I love my bf alot and want to live with him forever.
It's just lust. How can I get over that?
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>>17517445
Fuck bf more/differently
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>>17517445
Stop talking to your friend and spend more and better time with your boyfriend.
>>
Do you even know what love is, you vapid cunt? Just cheat on him and kill yourself. Totally worth it.

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My roommate and I are 25 year old women who live together alone in a sort of old, rickety house. We have been best friends since the 4th grade and have lived together since January. My roommate has had a few service industry jobs and has always claimed to make better friends with the males rather than the females. She has been working at this new place for about a month and a half, and met some new friends (two males) and has invited them over regularly (2 or 3 times a week) to smoke pot out back or drink until about 4 in the morning. (I am not a smoker/drinker) Once, without warning, she invited them over to spend the night. They slept on the couch. I was frustrated, but realized she has just as much ability to allow people over as I do, and so I left it alone. One day, she had her weed dealer come into the house to sell her some weed. Fast forward. Today she invited one of the same previous men over. I was trying to be polite and began talking to him about random things. He mentioned not being able to vote because he is a felon and I played it cool. I went into my room a short while later and googled his name. He has been arrested 4 times in the past year for theft, burglary, and violation of parole. Now I feel very uncomfortable, and a bit unsafe, but do not know how to approach the situation without appearing judgemental. Please help.
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>>17517414
Tell her that you feel uncomfortable with felons in the house that you do not know.
Make sure that your friend is ALWAYS home when the felon is over, and keep your eye on him.

I find it weird that you're best friends with someone who seems to be totally different than you. A friend of a friend is usually trustworthy, right?

Consider giving her the benefit of the doubt, maybe that felon isn't so bad after all lol
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>>17517414
I'd just tell your roommate "hey, you know that dudes a burglar, right?" and she'll be like "yeah, but he's cool now, blah blah blah" and she'll probably continue to be trashy.

I'd probably have a lot of fun with such a roommate, but as a straight edge you're in a tricky situation. Just roll with it, and put your foot down if it gets too bad. Keep some mace or a knife on you and keep your valuables hidden.

You half to walk the edge between knowing that it's unfair of her to make you feel uncomfortable in your own home, and knowing that it's unfair for you to assume that someone is dangerous because they're a thief. So keep your options open.
>>
Never, and I mean NEVER allow drug dealers into your house

What are you, stupid?

Just because he's a drug dealer doesn't mean he's stupid, but the fact that he's a felon means that he'll happily look through your shit and notice anything of value

NEVER allow drug deals to go down where you love unless you like shitting where you eat too

Want some advice? Change a lock or two and tell your cunt of a roommate to buy shit outside of the house or at shops if it's only weed

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Why the FUCK doesnt Quick Reply work on this board?

How do i fix it
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Turn off adblock
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>>17517406
>>17517406
for the whole site or just /adv/?

because it doesnt work for just /adv/
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>>17517421
Just /adv/ I believe, but I have it off for the whole site

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Never had a girlfriend, but I am not a virgin. I dress preppy but I have a nice/cute face. How do I look like a fuckboy and get girls?
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>>17517393
>How do I look like a fuckboy
I dont think that'd work with your face m8
>and get girls
go for the rich Chinese businessman vibe.
>>
Be a man, set for only one and go just for her
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>>17517432
I'm a little too young to be dressing like that, I feel. I'm only a freshman in college, but like I said earlier, I just go for the preppy look at the moment.

>>17517435
How do I "be a man"? When I'm a closeted MtF? I transitioned for a few months but stopped so now I just look like a male. I'm ultimately unhappy and depressed because i am a male. I thought losing my virginity would solve things, but it didn't.


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How do I become a high-functioning sociopath?
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>>17517304
Why the fuck would you want to?
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>>17517412
To manipulate women and break them.
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>>17517413
You've already lost the plot of being a sociopath, so there's no hope for you.

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I am from Cali and I recently started to attend this German language group. There is a kind of cute guy who is German and he is here for work. I want to ask him out, but I'm aware of the fact that he works as a senior manager at a bank and he earns a lot of cash. I don't think he will pick someone like me. I do look average. I'm not being modest here - I had my photos rated on numerous websites.
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>>17517244
Shoot your shot.
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>>17517249
Sorry English is not my first language (I'm from Argentina) so I didn't really understand this.
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>>17517256
You should ask him on a date, worst case scenario is hell refuse.

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I felt like I just ruined a married couple's relationship unintentionally through cultural misunderstandings. Made this 17505108 thread here a few days ago.

The run down of what happened was that ultimately my host father thought (and probably still thinks) that I cheated with his wife. I have been blocked by the both of them. I don't know what has been going on, but they seem to have returned back to their appropriated schedule to meet need's end for the time being. I was able to contact one of their sons and he has been very open and understanding, and...
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Got in contact with one of my other previous host brothers whose really cool. He has been willing to help me out in any way possible, which is great, but he has to keep quiet in order to avert any attention.
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>>17517240
are you south east asian ?
>>
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>>17517269

No.

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What the fuck is wrong if everything in your life is great and you lack nothing, but you still keep feeling like something is missing, and are not happy?
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>>17517206
Hmm, I don't know. I've never had my life that together. I doubt many people in /adv/ have. I need more info to venture a guess:
How old are you?
Do you watch your thoughts very often? If so, do you obsess over fantasies, anxieties, things like that?
Do you have any ambitions? Maybe you want to help miserable people or become really good at something?
>>
What makes other people happy doesn't necessarily make you happy

Sounds like depression. Your life might be great but if your brain chemicals decide to fuck you over, you could be king of the world and still feel unhappy. Synapses and shit. Get some melatonin and a therapist
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>>17517206
This could be a variety of things. If you drink every day or extremely often, then you're going to be depressed (even when you're not drinking) because it's a depressant.

What are you eating? Are you eating manifolds and not much else? Your body relies on that nourishment to create energy, and chemicals you need to be happy and healthy.

Do you work out? Or do you sit at a computer job? Or do you sit and watch TV as your 'unwind' time?

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HELP! This is an emergency! So short recap
>started actively showing my interest in a girl
>thought she responded well to it
>made a thread asking how to progress this, was told to coast along until the weekend when we will both be drinking together again

So I've been doing this. I've still seen her and replying to her text but she friends with my suitemates so we've been playing cards for a bit after classes.

Well today she didn't text me, which...
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Please ignore the spelling and grammatical errors, accidentally posted before proofreading.

Also, if there is anymore info you need please ask
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>>17517196
Can you confirm if she is fucking one of your suitemates ?
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>>17517215
They are the room right next to me and I never hear anything, one is gay and the other doesn't seem that way with her. That said, they went to the same highschool together so who knows

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>bought my 16yo son a new queen bed
>for a year and a half he slept all over it, this side, that side, different place every night.
>at 17 and a half years old he got a girlfriend who stayed over a lot (don't crucify me, I convinced him to use condoms, & would rather have it happen under my roof, rather than somewhere they could get in trouble or wouldn't have protection ready)
>they were inseperable, went to school together, went and did everything...
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>>17517193
Hollywood directors might be interested in this
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>>17517207
Sad eh?
Is it legal to sell stories of your kid's potentially depressive behavior in exchange for college money? Lol
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& before ppl start asking we live in a 1bed appartment so his bed is in kind of an open area off the kitchen like intended to be a dining room I think,

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How do I not be a socially oblivious retard? People say things and I become so self aware of my thoughts that I stop paying them mind mid interaction. I have no reguard for people's feelings and it catches them off guard. I don't mean to toot my own dick but I'm 6'4", very fit and have been considered a 'model' by many girls. Every person seems to notice me but once it comes to socializing I'm basically a spaghetti salesman.

I've casually hung out with the most attractive girls and (20/20 hindsight) they wanted my dick all...
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Donald Trump is an idiot.
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>>17517100
Dubs confirms.
To be fair instead of building a wall or pushing for insane levels of gun control, there should be more focus on the problems that bring these shallow remedies to light.

If we can improve the quality of life (after lowering some of the States' national debt) we'll have better international relations and humanity as a whole could improve.

But what do I know
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>>17517100

not only that, but he is also dumb AND bad. wow

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To make a long story short, I just moved into a new apartment and it appears to be overrun with bugs. Large and many roaches, and tons of maggots and caterpillars. I have sprayed my poison, and they don't go. My land lord has had pest control spray my house 2 times in the past few weeks, and I still walk into the kitchen to see roaches scatter like nuts.
What do I do? Should I go back to my land lord and tell him that the place is still infested, or what?

And I keep my house spotless. I am a neatfreak, so there is no way they are getting to food or water.
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>>17517033
Yes, you should, but realistically you'll have to learn to live with them. It's most likely one of your dirty ass neighbors keeping an unhygienic home that keeps the bugs thriving in the walls between you, and good luck getting them to change.

Your best bet is to buy some raid and spray every crack, corner and crevice of the place, behind each appliance and especially in your bathroom.
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>>17517033
Bugs only show up if there is food.
So clean all that food off the floor and set traps.
In a few months, they'll be gone.

Also don't kill any spiders. Spiders are directly related to how many bugs you got

Setting traps and changing sheets helps your frame of mind but what I've said are among the few things to really change things.

If you're really paranoid, bake your sheets then put your bed in the middle of the room with small bowls full of water under each foot. Then...
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>>17517056
>>17517054
Good advice, thank you. They just sprayed a week ago, so do you think it is too early to go back and say there are still bugs?

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My neighbors two doors down have a daughter who's cute as hell and is about my age. If she's outside when I'm pulling up to my house she keeps looking at me.

I wanna smash. How do I smash a neighbor? I don't just wanna knock on her door and say "u want sum fuk?"
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Yeah, pretty much. Just ask her if she wants the dick.
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Just approach her casually, ask if you cam talk to her for a minute, then throw open your trench coat and wave your dick at her.
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>>17517009
I think my situation is dual to yours. My neighbor two doors down has a daughter around my age, I once met her and the daughter in the lift lobby and she told me I am really good looking. I however have no romantic interest towards her daughter, who is an attractive voluptuous young girl, but I'm having a crush on another girl.

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I'm in a quasi-relationship with a girl. I'd like it to be more official, but she always says she doesn't want a relationship right now, be it polyamorous or monogamous. She says it's potentially because she's not that into me or it's potentially because she's not in such a place in her life, but that she doesn't know.

But she's not sleeping with other people right now (and says she has no interest in that) and otherwise gives me all the normal tfwgf feels, like how she looks at me and all the kind things she says about me...
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>Is this my problem, or hers?
Yours, 100%. She's told you what she wants out of this (or rather, doesn't want). It's up to you whether you want to take it or leave it.
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>>17516962
I'm not blind to what you're saying, but isn't there some sort of hypocrisy in it? Like, it's more of a relationship than some relationships, and yet it's my bad if I think of it as such?

I feel in that the ball's in my court to accept or deny, but is it petty or stupid to deny the (essentially) relationship on the grounds that she doesn't want to think of it that way?
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>>17516983
>isn't there some sort of hypocrisy in it?
Sure, but she's flat out told you that she doesn't want to be in an arrangement that's labelled as a relationship, and she probably doesn't have feelings for you anyway.

>is it petty or stupid to deny the (essentially) relationship on the grounds that she doesn't want to think of it that way?
I don't think so. I don't think it's fair on you to stay if you're...
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why do white girls get shit for dressing trashy but asian girls do not?
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>>17516881
Because yellow fever
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you're either insane or talking about one or two people you know and they're prettier and have better style
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More desirable = held to higher standards.


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