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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 491. page
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Gf and I decided we both needed a break after a huge fight, how do I keep myself occupied and lee my mind off it during
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*keep my mind off
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>>17495269
break AKA both of you are unable to have a conversation like adults so you stop talking to eachother and she goes around getting dicks shoved in her until she feels like she's had enough dicks to be able to deal with you again.

what was the fight about anon
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>>17495269
Work on improving yourself and enjoying life, because if you are on a break the relationship is fucked.

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How do I treat women?

I've finally quit /r9k/ and am trying to make something of my life. I'm working on getting my driver's license, currently attending a community college, and work at the local Target.

I have no idea how to talk to women even causally. I've just come off an immense hatred of women. I didn't think they're as good of workers as men, any woman playing a video game is just an attention whore, and that any woman who is having sex with her bf is a slut, etc.

/r9k/ is cancer, anons.
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>>17495225
>/r9k/ is cancer, anons.
so are women to be honest with you family.
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>>17495225

/R9k/ is toxic in the sense that it makes you think all women are the same.
But it's good to know what MOST of them are like...
You just gotta talk to them like you would talk to a man, form your opinion afterwards instead of before.
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>>17495225

Congrats man keep it up. When you talk to women the best thing to do is listen mostly and control the conversation/topic. You do that by changing the subject subtly to something you prefer or making a joke if she's too consistent on the subject. Jokes are key, the best thing to do is joke with her like she's a nagging sister. Don't go into debates, drama blah blah and talk about feminism and all that gay/heavy shit, defuse anything like that with a joke, changing the subject or if all else fails,...
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I have a serious question.

I am hearing impaired. I have moderate to severe hearing loss and have had it since I was about 4 (turning 30 in Decemeber). It's nerve damage so there's not a shit ton that can be done within current financial situations as well as a number of things.

I was out of work for years and have been working for 2 years and I'm quite glad. But I'm getting annoyed at the people I work with for them joking/mocking my hearing impairment. I know that this is a disability and I wonder if it can be considered discrimination in...
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>Happy you're working.
>But want to fuck that up by ruining your relationship with your employer because your butthurt people are taking about you when you can't even really hear them.

I wish I had your problems.
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>I've dealt with people saying shit about my hearing for a long time

How do you know?
>>
Dude be happy you have a job, my mom is 44 and she has hearing disability , in all her 6 years of searching jobs since she got this , no luck at all . Be happy with what you have

Was told not to eat anything after 7am until my minor surgery (frenuloplasty) sometime this afternoon. Accidentally had a boiled egg at 11. Is it a big deal? I can't afford to have this delayed for another month. Haven't drank any water either.
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Possibly, just let them know beforehand.
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Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at +1 (800) 273-8255.

You're not worthless people care about you
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>>17495206
This needs to be posted as a sticky.

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Should I use craigslist to get laid? Is there any better way of finding one-time hookups?
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Dunno about Craigslist. Never thought about it I guess.
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>>17495200
?Is there any better way of finding one-time hookups?

Tinder
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Watch out for bug catchers.

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I'm thinking of doing a welding course to try and get a job in Yurop. A Portuguese friend of mine said the only way is to fly to Europe and apply for jobs while there.
Do you think that's a good idea?
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Do YOU think that's a good idea?
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>>17495298
The pay is good and it seems like the job's on demand. I just don't know how if I could land a job while on tourist visa.
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That's a bad idea. Getting a work permit is not so easy. And you're not even supposed to be looking for work if you enter Europe as a visa-free tourist.

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I sometimes ask my girlfriend to be my femdom and it works fine so far. She spanks me, spits me, etc. but there is no real value in it for her (as she naturally is not so sadistic). How can I make it more pleasent for her as well? I thought about maybe doing anything she wants for the whole day (cleaning dishes, cooking, etc.). But I don't want it to be too weird for her.
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Relationships are about meeting in the middle, ask her if there's some weird shit she wants to try and roll with it. That of kill that part of you. My wife will never do anal, and I will never get to stick it up her ass. But I'm fine with that because she sacrifices for me too.
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My girlfriend likes the rougher stuff too and initially I didn't enjoy doing it to her. What really helped is that she shows clear excitement, happiness, and arousal from it. When I see that kind of positive reaction I can be rough without any malice because I know it makes her happy. You don't need to be sadistic to act that way (this is healthier too).

We've progressed further now. We can role play where she doesn't show happiness and I'm still comfortable because I KNOW she enjoys it. It took time to establish that trust.

Help your girlfriend realize your enjoy her treatment of you through your actions and moans and stuff in the moment. It'll take time. You may have to focus on clearly expressing pleasure in the beginning to help her understand you enjoy it.
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>>17495183
you should start by playing that album on repeat until she enjoys it

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I just wanna talk, /adv/
I feel like I've been mildly depressed throughout my entire 3 years of college, spend a lot of time going to classes then just coming home, building friendships that last for a few weeks then dissipate. I've joined clubs and stuff but all those friendships feel hollow and bound by default rather than by any lasting measure. I haven't had any relationships and only ever been on like one date. I don't know if things are ever going to get better and I can't really talk about this to anyone. How can I cope with this?
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>>17495180

Some people have very difficult personal struggles.
No one on this board could help you, gotta do your own research, think about how you became this way and what you want to change, what you want out of life.

It's a long extremely difficult process, good luck.
>>
can relate, i figure iv just been burned so hard by people that forming relationships seems pointless and im just waiting for them find me, it works because i have a good social life, but i could take more advantage of things

its all about perspective and maybe you fear rejection or feel different from everyone else?

no one can tell you, only you know, smoke some weed and do all the good drugs, it might help answer shit for you
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>>17495180
>I don't know if things are ever going to get better and I can't really talk about this to anyone.

I think most of your problems stem from this. When you talk to nobody but yourself how can anyone tell you you're wrong or right?

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My mom is lying next to me with high blood pressure: 174-98, or something like that. She's too dizzy to stand up for long. She has issues with weight and stress as well.

Most places I've looked up advise reducing sodium intake, eat healthier, and the like, but she does this. We think the weight issue is more to do with excessive water than anything else.

Any other advice on high blood pressure? Your intake will be highly appreciated
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What the fuck is wrong with you? Your mother needs medical attention and you're on 4chan. Call a doctor.
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Clogged arteries(if she has been REALLY following the low sodium diet), go to a doctor to get some pigment injection xrays done.
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>>17495169

I told her before coming here, but she doesn't want it

In fact, a mature person does not fall in love, he rises in love. The word 'fall' is not right. Only immature people fall; they stumble and fall down in love. Somehow they were managing and standing. They cannot manage and they cannot stand — they find a woman and they are gone, they find a man and they are gone. They were always ready to fall on the ground and to creep. They don't have the backbone, the spine; they don't have that integrity to stand alone.

A mature person has the integrity to be alone. And when a mature person gives love, he gives...
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nice blog where do I subscribe?
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>>17495146


Two mature persons in love help each other to become more free. There is no politics involved, no diplomacy, no effort to dominate. How can you dominate the person you love? Just think over it. Domination is a sort of hatred, anger, enmity. How can you think of dominating a person you love? You would love to see the person totally free, independent; you will give him more individuality. That's why I call it the greatest paradox: they are together so much so that they are almost one, but still in that...
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>>17495149
You didn't even read that, did you?

How harmful is self-suffocation as a long-term habbit? I started as a form of self-harm to try and measure how painful it would be to hang myself but now I actually find it quite relaxing.

I don't do it with a belt or anything though, just my hands (and stop before I'm unconscious), so there's no chance of any foreign object being tightened while I'm out and ending me, but that's not as big an issue as having painful damages dealt though.

I'd appreciate some guidance, I'm sure some of you do this while masturbating?
(Btw I've...
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Seek professional help
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I say keep going for it OP, the less brain cells you have everytime you do this, the more of a chance you end up in a coma. The less retards in the world, the better.
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>>17495142
Well, it's not as unusual as you might think, many people you'd characterize as perfectly normal or even intelligent, in so far as smarts go, practice erotic asphyxiation, the smart ones are usually more on the "artsy" side though.

>>17495127
Eh, I don't know, does it really help? I'm only rarely really in stress about suicide, it's mostly just calm acceptance.

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How many FWBs is too many?

Right now I have 2, but this person is really into me and so I might pick up another one.

Is this somehow amoral or inappropriate?
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It depends on what you agreed upon with the other two, and whether you use protection (condoms, not birth control).

>protected and you spoke about other partners
If you breached the topic of whether the other person is allowed to fuck someone else, I think it's fair to give a heads up unless they also specified that they don't care.
>protected and never talked about different partners
Don't ask don't tell policy.
>unprotected and talked about different partners
Inform.

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>>17495116
As for further clarification, not, it's not immoral because the very concept of FWBs implies a lack of commitment, unless decided upon otherwise. Towards your sexual partners the responsibility that does remain is to not expose them to health risks that they're not aware of.

Obviously you can have personal principles against this on religious or ideological grounds nonetheless.
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Considering you could get and std and give it to the others, yes. Why would you need multipule ppl if you have one already anyways? Your being irresponsible.

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How do I deal with salty people? I was at a birthday party and this guy would keep taunting me. Ex: i was talking with him when i suddenly went spaghetti and he threw a paper towel at my face. I kept saying things like "thats rude" or along those lines but didn't go too far to not ruin the party. How do I deal with this behavior if it goes on?
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Calmly tell him that it bothers you and ask him not to do it again.

If he does it again calmly tell him that next time you're going to punch him.

If he does it again punch him.
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>>17495155
He's older taller and stronger, so a punch won't work. Maybe I'll just ignore him
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>>17495321
Punch him in the nuts, then take a shit on his chest.

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I need help /adv/.

I'm really into this guy I have been friends with for a year. Recently I found out that he's dating a mutual friend of ours and obviously this hurt pretty bad. However, I know that this girl has had a lot of casual flings with a few guys I know and probably with other guys too. Should I tell this to my crush? I'm not sure if he knows and he could really do better than this girl.
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>>17495069

Aaaand let me guess...

Better = you ?
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>>17495069
The question here is if your beloved will think that you are a petty schemer if you do it.
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>>17495069
It is pretty awful.
It is their business, if they're happy together and you care about him, don't ruin their relationship.
Let them be. Move on.

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What my girlfriend told me before I went for my deployment...
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Gay.
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Do you need advice? This is really sweet assuming she is gray and you're blue.

She probably doesn't want you to go
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>>17495057
That's nice, but as soon as you're on the other side of the world getting blown to pieces by Muhammad she will be taking it deep from your local Chad Thundercock

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I've seen this drink sponsor a lot of sports events. Is it a healthy drink? I'm going to drink some, so I can improve my health.
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Ive seen McDonalds sponsoring alot of events too, I'm now heading down there for a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese, some Hot Fresh Fries, and an Ice Cold CocaCola!
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>>17495045

The more you drink, the healthier you get. The recommendation is at least two cans a day, but that's the minimum.

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So, i had this thing going with a girl for about 1-2 months. Apparently things were going well, she told me that she thought that was in love with me, kissed me whenever she could, etc.

Then, 1 week after she told me that she was in love with me, suddenly she just came out of nowhere and told me that it just wouldn't work and that she didn't liked me enough to get a thing going.
So we cut off contact almost completly.

Fast foward 1 month later, we're not even greeting eachother when we meet. But, me and some of my friends noticed that she's...
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>>17495020
Women are not sure about what they want. Just ignore her and move on to someone who is isn't a mess.
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>>17495020
>What the fuck does she want?

Ah yes. Another request for mind reading.

Why do you give a fuck what she's thinking?

Decide what YOU want, act (or don't) based on that.
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>>17495024
That's what i've been trying to do if this wasn't tormenting me in every possible way. I'm literally forced to see her because of our classes and because she became friends with mine's.

>>17495051
Im not even sure what i want to do. Emotionally, i think i want to get back with her, despite that involves losing my dignity and submitting myself to another (and pretty likely) breakup or rejection. But rationally, it's better for...
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I quit looking at pornography and masturbating five days ago, and for the past three I've been enduring serious urges to go back. They're not overt either, it's just like a subtle stress, blue balls, or oddly enough, dreams about getting off. To those of you who have experience quitting, and know the early stages, how did you guys generally deal with it? The sort of demand I feel for getting off is actually making me feel lonely, but knowing myself it's probably for the best that I don't have a GF or a girl I like presently in the early stages of this...
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>>17495003
It's actually worse to quit. It's like alcohol it's good in moderation.
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>>17495006
I am quitting and there's no convincing me otherwise
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>>17495012
Have fun

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A friend invited me to go swimming. I have mild acne and stretch marks on my back and my bodytype is skinny fat. I kinda want to go with with them but i also dont want to show my body. What do i do? Convince me its not a big deal to display my body in public?
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>>17494925
>bodytype is skinny fat
tf is that?
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Don't worry nobody actually cares OP
>>
get a compression top

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>decade ago
>I was a tender 15
>neighboring redhead who was 2 years younger had crush on me
>her mom thought it was a good idea to have me babysit her
>my mom thought so too
>bad idea: teenage hormones lead us to experiment and subsequently fuck like rabbits
>surprise surprise when, not knowing about birth control I knock her up
>parents...
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>>17494924
you got a range of options here

srsly do, you done fucked up senpai
>>
Rape your own son
It is the only option
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>>17495025

welp

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My girlfriend of 1 year is very Vanilla in bed. I'm not really surprised since I'm her first boyfriend, but how do I slowly get her more comfortable with doing more kinky things? I've suggested stuff and been really patient, but she seems completely happy with plain Vanilla sex. I hate to be needy, but missionary and cowgirl are only great by themselves for so long. I need raunchy dirty talk and sexy teasing. I feel like I weird her out when I bring this stuff up.
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>>17494900
>I need raunchy dirty talk and sexy teasing.
Some people just aren't into that. For myself, the dirty talk just makes me laugh my ass off, because it's so out of character. And then I can't enjoy sex. If it's a big deal breaker for you, then look elsewhere.
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>>17494900
Just grab her by the head, throw her face down on the bed, rip off her pants, and anger fuck the shit out of her until she loves it. When she protests you hold her down harder. Guaranteed to work and she'll come harder than she ever has before since women secretly love to be dominated.
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>>17494918
gtfo, this is what you do if you want to be charged with rape.

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I've been thinking about killing myself, but I figured if I can get a good job and make a decent amount of money I might feel happier. I'm willing to spend all my time trying but I don't know what to do.
What's a good degree to get into that will get me a job that will make me good money and won't make me hate my life
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>likes Reddit and Morty
You probably should just kill yourself.
>>
Nurse

Statistician
>>
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>>17494883
What about trailer park boys

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/adv/ I need your wisdom

My teeth have gotten pretty bad due to general laziness and no desire to go out of my room most of the time because hikkikomori/NEET. What is the absolute quickest way to whiten your teeth? Is there a method that will get them super white again in a mere month or two? I don't care if it's dangerous.
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>>17494876
Paint your teeth with acrylic.
>>
You mean, besides Crest Whitestrips?
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>>17494880
Paint sounds like a temporary solution, I want a permanent one.

>>17494881
How long do those take to make your teeth white again?

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Basically want a girl to bend over while grinding

I can get away with ass grabs nearly every time

Can I get away with this one?
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>>17494786
Push lightly to guide her, she will bend over if she wants. If not, give it up..
>>
>>17494786
Yes but you gotta pic ya location.
>wear best clothes
>go to night club that spins generic top 40
>women grind and twerk on ya
>grab all the ass
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>>17494790
that simple?

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I'm an adult on generic Adderall XR 30 mg. It worked pretty well for like 3 or 4 days. Now it's only working about half the time or less. Is my dose too low? I don't want to sound like some junky when i go to the dr.
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>>17494751
Are you taking adderall for ADHD?
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>>17494751
Though i will say that unless your condition is horribly debilitating, i would recommend against using adderall. You can easily develop tolerance, and it is almost no different from meth.
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>>17494751
take it nights onl. this isnt some fucking prozac. its a stim.

Last night (mid night) I applied for a job and had to do 3 tests (numerical, logical and a questionnaire) I passed the logical and questionnaire but failed the numerical.

Obviously, that leaves me screwed because I cannot afford to wait 6 months to reapply. I was thinking of calling the company this morning and telling them I had computer problems while attempting the numerical test therefore the reason why I didnt do well, hoping they will let me redo the test.
What type of computer problems can I say I experienced to make a convincing argument??
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Uh, they'll be able to see that you completed the test. You know that, right?
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>>17494723
yeahh, I was hoping to say "muhhh once I started the numerical test my laptop starting acting funny, hence why I couldnt completed it on time or never done as better than I could"
>>
>>17494748
bump

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I work 3rd shift in a factory and school starts in less than 2 weeks. I have an interview at a different place Friday.

A position for 2nd shift just opened here. I'd be making more than I do now and it would work with my schedule. If I apply I'm gonna have an interview with my employer for it.


Should I tell him that I'm currently looking for a new job that works with my school schedule?
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>>17494687
Nope, do not ever tell your current employer you're looking for other work, if it is at will employment then they can fire you on the spot. You can also choose to tell your new potential employer that they can not contact your current employer for that reason..
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>>17494705
I never tell the people I'm applying at not to call my current employer.

I'm in Wisco and were a fire at will state cuz Scott walker, the place I work for is kinda corporate nazis. Last week they interrogated me because they didn't believe my grandpa died and didn't want to pay for bereavement.

Thanks for the tip.
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>>17494713
I typed the first sentence wrong, I never allow them to call my current employer

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so i tried to talking to this girl i thought was cute on face book. i made a joke like "ive never talked to you ... how interesting are you on a scale of paperclip to he-man?" she just responded "no thank you". so i came to my attention she might have read it has "how INTERESTED are you" instead of "INTERESTING"... which makes me look like a douche. i tried to clear things up just in case but is there pretty much zero chance with this girl now? i feel like i fucked up my choice of words.
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>>17494662
Regardless of what you meant or how she took it, she isn't interested, plain and simple. You're lucky she even told you no, thank you. Most of the time it is a passive aggressive denial, but you got a blunt one.

IMO your opener line was fucking fantastic and unique, but it will take the right girl to respond positively.
>>
how do i know she isnt interested? i am a bit autist sorry
>>
Different anon, but bruh just let it go she's flat out not feeling you. Nice opening line though, better than simply saying "hi" or "hello"

Rejection is a good thing, because it saves you guys the pain of finding out you're not compatible before you're in too deep.

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Bad Car Fax.png
1 MB,
I'm lonely and isolated from the outside world

I literally have nobody to talk to in real life

I feel like I'm going insane. How do I deal with this
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>>17494634
You can't. Companionship is essential for humans. We're a social species. It sucks, but it's hard for some of us to interact and connect with others. Not to mention that isolation leads to lots of physical diseases and problems. Go humans! Sigh...
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>>17494634

Get a dog and an actual career
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>>17494717
I have an actual career but they're co-workers and we don't talk unless we're working on the same code

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2hx2zd.jpg.gif
1 MB,
TL;DR: I want to get in touch with my ex, but not to date

My ex girlfriend and I broke up almost exactly a month ago. We had a great, albeit short-lived relationship, ended by a dumb fight, followed by a failure to communicate, followed by another dumb fight, followed by a rejected apology and an exchange of "good luck with your future". It's not really important what happened, we both handled things poorly.

I'm moving to another state in a couple months and for some reason she's been on my mind a lot lately. I miss her, but not from a...
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I personally say ask her. You may be rejected and no longer communicate, but at least you truly know if she'd still like to be friends. You may be hurt, but if this person truly matters to you, then talk.
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>>17494596
> I've turned down a couple different dates because I want to focus on what's ahead of me
How the fuck do people do this? Just talk to girls and beee urself and they'll throw themselves at you even if you don't make a move. Where are the women that do this? Is this an east coast thing?
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>>17494890
They're girls I know. It's called networking. Getting a job at Starbucks was like steroids for socializing and dating. I've met almost every girl I've ever dated through there, including her. Also be friendly to everyone you converse with, not just people you wanna bang. If someone watches you carry on an interesting, fun, energetic conversation with someone else they're gonna want in on it. Girls included. That's my method. Charisma.

>>17494803
I...
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