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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 5. page
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<< how do you stop this while you're still young?
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>>
Be secure in yourself first that you don't need anyone else.
>>
>>17849975
Try to start watching anime
>>
get a waifu

I feel too smart and it is making me depressed.
I ask of you, /adv/, how do I become dumb again?
12 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
get rid of your smartphone
join a cult
>>
Watch daytime television, I recommend Jerry springer.
>>
>>17849918
You arent smart at all, your a pretenious condecending dick munch who cant fit in. You sound like your 12, "i cant believe im stuck in school, everyones am idiot". Go talk to some people and not just judge them

So of course I'm a hapa strange thing is my dad is Japanese.
He's so ashamed of me. I've tried working jobs that don't require college degrees and I've hated all of them. I want to go back into college but, for whatever reason I'm fucking stupid and flunk tests left and right no matter how much I study.

I get extreme waves of self loathing. I'm thinking of harming myself as punishment for even attempting this again but, I'm going to try and do better this time.

How do I not fuck up college? I might have some form of...
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>>
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Bump because its not a relationship problem.
>>
>>17849878
Go see a medical professional. Buying that shit second hand is expensive and not a long term solution.
>>
>>17849878
Wtf is a hapa?

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Here is advice for you: get gifts quick
post your gift ideas to help anons that suck at buying for people
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>>17849849
give people cards with money in it. bam.
>>
>>17849849
Portable chargers
>>
>>17849868
This is a good one, 6 foot braided charging cables are nice and get used every day too

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>gf takes coke once in 6 months
>forgot coke at my place a few months ago
>lonely night
>not working tomorow
>for no reason decided to take snort some of the coke left
>it was 2 minutes ago
>feels nothing
>had smoked weedearlier if that might mean someting
what should i expect?

am i lost?
6 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17849842
dude you didn't just mix weed with coke

are you serious? go to the hospital right now if you are alone and make you sure you don't fall asleep. also, drink as much water as you can.

don't die on me OP
>>
>>17849885
it isn't that harmful my friend was at my place one time when my parents weren't home, I insisted on smoking some weed, afterwards he tells me hes really tired and needs a quick wake up so he does a line, he only puked and went home right after but he didn't have permanent damage
>>
>>17849842
I wouldn't do anymore. Coke is one of those things you feel instantaneously. You'll be fine, odds are it's coke that has been cut severely.

>>17849885
Weed and coke are fine you autist.

How can I make a girl more comfortable in a conversation?
13 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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" How can I MAKE a girl (young woman?) more comfortable??

Um, buy her a blanket and force her to provide for her own comfort?

She is her own person. Period.
>>
>>17849851
Less anxious and nervous while talking to me, I don't want anyone to feel on edge around me. Is there really nothing that people generally do to achieve this?
>>
>>17849877
Bump

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I am trying to give my girlfriend of 6 months, her first orgasm.. Before she got with me, she had been with you guys. I am her first boyfriend.
(Both 21)

Everytime I try to give her an orgasm by the clitoris, she stops me after 3-5 minutes.
Her body starts shaking a bit, and she gets those tweaks in her body.
But then she tells me to stop, since it's not comfortable for her.

Is it because she is not relaxing?
Thanks!
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>>
Unrelated, but this post gave me the feels brah. I posted a thread identical to this about my ex a few months ago.

Anyways, after a year with mine, I managed to give her a clitoral orgasm with my tongue (I was her first). Fingers might be a bit too rough for her.

By "been with you guys" I assume that meant two guys?
>>
>>17849806
Also, try carrying motions with your tongue and fingers. Put your index and middle fingers palm-up into her while giving the "come here" motion.

Do this while licking her clitoris. Get sufficient foreplay! Can't stress that enough. Go MINIMUM 20 minutes of foreplay and dirty talking.
>>
>>17849839
Yes, two guys**

We have really good sex, and the whole orgasm thing is nothing she is like REALLY interested in trying.. We tried anal, but had to give up because it was hurting her too much, even though we used plenty of lube etc.

But she just says it's not comfortable, and it gets too much.. Also that her whole body feels weird.. Since i'm not a woman, it's kinda hard to put myself in the situation and I never had this problem before.. I think it's because she's a bit afraid of it and can't relax.. But not sure, that's why i'm asking you guys!

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How the hell do you make friends? I'm going to college soon and I'm really afraid I'm going to end up alone.
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>>17849794
don't be desesperated. if you don't get any friends at first, it's okay. be yourself and don't force anything that feels uncomfortable to you. you will find your people my dude
>>
>>17849794
You're going to end up alone just kill yourself now and get it over with.
>>
>>17849811
This
People just arrive even for the most autistic

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A few days ago my boyfriend broke up with me. He told me it's because he wants to flirt/fuck with other girls and he felt bad for thinking some girls were cute while with me.

He said there's an 80% chance he will not do anything and we will date again.

We live together and there's no way I am able to leave because all my friends are our roommates and my parents live across the country.

He still tells me he loves me and we sleep in the same bed. He even kissed me and earlier today he texted that he missed me.

I'm so confused...
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>>17849772
Wew, he's playing you like a fiddle.
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>>17849772
just cut him off lol
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>>17849813
I know and it hurts so much ;_;
>>17849827
I really wish I could, but I do have to live here. I just want things back to normal

I'm 20y old virgin.I had phimosis(foreskin won't retract) until 2 years ago when i got circumcised (long story short i had to, extreme case etc.). I'm circumcised in a country where like 95% of people are uncut and it bothers me what would girl think about that if she saw my cut penis. I had few opportunities to fuck few girls but im too fucked up about that. My dick is average btw.

Many friends are saying im wasting my potential considering my "looks".

Btw, should i always use lube while having sex considering my dick is cut, when i jerk...
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>>17849752
dude you have a cut dick that sucks wow never have sex again much shame such cut
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>>17849752
Don't sweat it. You'll probably be fine.
>>
tell her you're a secret jew.

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How do I change into someone more normal?y hobbies are pretty much just video games, watching video games on youtube or twitch, and fucking 4chan. Im in my senior year of college and I'm just a complete loser, I really just have no clue what I can do
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>>17849717
That's a pretty normal set of hobbies besides changing 4chan to Reddit or facebook
>>
Do something active. Active stuff usually involves other people.
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>>17849717
gym is amazing. jogging groups and bike groups are great. lot of nice healthy normies.

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I do not have a piano teacher nor can I afford one right now especially with the business of university. I want to know what is the best way for me to learn how to read sheet music and self teach myself songs which ultimately will help towards my main goal: To become a good piano player.

>inb4 just google how to read sheets first noob

Most of these methods haven't helped at all nor do they teach in a useful and memorable way.

Instrument playing anons, what do you recommend. How can I become a better piano player? I'm...
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get a part time job and save up money and find a piano teacher that meshes well with you
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>>17849701
I've been searching for jobs for several months now with no luck. So currently, that's not an option. If I were to do this, I'd have to wait quite a long while till I actually manage to get a job.
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>>17849724
Probably focus efforts on a job and let the piano be a reward for your efforts

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I'm a 20 year old male and I'm on pretty strong antidepressants. While they are helping my mood immensely, a side effect is that they make it extremely difficult for me to get and maintain an erection.

I've considered Viagra for this, but in my country it's available by prescription only. I've asked my doctor over the phone, and he said he wouldn't want to prescribe it due to my age.

Are there any natural or over-the-counter supplements that work like Viagra, in that I can simply take them to get more blood flow to the penis? If not,...
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>>17849579
Have you talked to your doctor about trying a different anti-depressant? Also, have you tried using cock rings? They might help.
>>
Change your medication, or change your doctor
>>
>>17849590
I've tried cockrings, but they don't seem to help a whole lot unfortunately.
>>17849597
I'm a bit scared to change my medication, I've been through more than I can count and this is the first that's actually worked.

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Well, /adv/ after years of dealing with massive depression I finally brought it up to a doctor and they prescribed me prozac, I'm pretty nervous and now questioning if i'm really THAT sad and how much it will change me. My depression has pretty much defined my life. Is the world about to get fucked by a new me or am I fucked from a whole new angle? Am I finally free?
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>>17849516
The purpose of anti-depressants is to bring balance to the chemicals in your brain that are causing depression. You'll still sometimes have episodes of depression, but other than that, I'd say you don't really change much, due to my experience with meds.
And it isn't instant, either. It'll be gradual, so it won't be some sudden change that makes you into a brand new person. Some aspects of you might change, but you'll still be the same person as before. Just keep talking to...
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>>17849516
There is really no way to tell until you actually take the shit

Just keep in mind that there are tons of different kinds of antidepressants and what works for someone else may not work for you
>>
>>17849567
>>17849569

I'm really nervous about pills anyways so now I'm like "Am I really depressed or just a bitch?"

Also, nobody knows, I lied to my dad and said it was an upper to make me less tired. They don't know I have depression, I never tell them anything

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>Be me
>Edgy fgt
>Standing at a bridge and looking over trying to find the courage to do a flip
>0 friends 0 support network
>Decide to text stupid fucking suicide help line
>They treat me like shit
>Tell me im not in a crisis
>They hang up on me
>I tried jumping but pussy out

Who...
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>>17849504
There are a lot of live therapy chats and sites you can go to instead, and I find that they tend to be a lot more supportive. Do something like 7 Cups or another free therapy chat site.
>>
>>17849581
Ive used that before but it always ends in me feeling worse and them trying to send me to the crisis lines.
>>
>>17849504
The truth is nobody would really care if you killed yourself. People will say things like "think of your family" and "somebody cares about you", but you know deep down that nobody really cares. If you really want to die, find the most painless and fastest method available.

Choosing to fight that is your decision. If you really don't want to kill yourself then you should make something of yourself. Meditation, working out, studying, working, finding a goal to work towards, whatever...
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So I ordered a sweater 3 weeks ago.
What the fuck? Did my package get lost?
Someone please explain how it's been in transit for 18 days.
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>>17849483
Bump.
>>
>Someone please explain how it's been in transit for 18 days.
Did you pay for a guaranteed delivery time?

The reason it sat there is most likely because they want you to think about doing that next time. They really do sit on it till the end of the general "expected delivery window". Not just USPS, but pretty much all of the options.

Since it only began to have its status updated yesterday, we can assume now it's in the lovely holiday shipping mess. There isn't a whole lot you can do, unless you paid for...
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>>17849529
I don't know, I ordered it from someone, so I'd have to ask her.
The general expected delivery window is usually like a week max though.
I sent a package to Washington state (from Florida) and it was there in 3 or 4 days.

That's pretty fucking shitty.

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Looking for comedians that do good stand up and probably aren't too well known, because famous comedians like Amy Schumer are shit. Challenge mode: Find a funny woman comedian
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Natasha Leggero. Kathleen Madigan. Maria Bamford.

Hard mode is hard.
>>
Sarah Silverman is like the only one I wouldn't change the channel on instantly.
>>
>>17849436
Ali Wong, she's on Netflix.
Found a random clip.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6O92PE551I

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So at the age of 19 i've finally achieved my first gf. She is one year older than me, I do like her, I don't like her looks as much, but I like her as my gf. The problem is that she had fcked up past, she's still a virgin, but she's been kind of slutty, she is embarassed by it and she regrets it, but after she told me that I just can't unsee her giving some other fcking creep a bj, or when I look her in the eyes I can't stop thinking that she was a bitch. Am I able to overcome those thoughts, will it be healthy for me to stay in this relationship?...
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>>17849421
Sounds like you're settling
>>
>>17849421

You are clearly a moron and not ready for a relationship if you cannot get over the fact that she has been with other people. Get a grip.
>>
>>17849421
>gf
>still a virgin
>slutty

Dude, this makes no sense at all.

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It honestly feels impossible to get a girl.

No matter how well I dress, act and lift I feel as though I'll never hook up with anyone.

What do you even say to a pretty girl you don't even know ?

How do you get good feedback from her ?
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>>17849357

I think this is my 2nd cousin. Kinda weird.

Anyways, a lot of this depends on how old you are. Are you in high school, college, in your 20s, in your 30s or beyond?
>>
>>17849367
>>17849367
Finished highschool, early 20's

Hobbies: I'm a newbie when it comes to playing guitar and drawing.

Lastly, I have min wage job and still live with my parents.
>>
You have beautiful eyes

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I have a lot of friends but I can't call them real. When I have problems with anything pretty much I don't feel like I can share with them, mostly because I know that even if they try they won't help me. I just feel really money and like I don't have anything to lean on. It feels weird and I don't know what to do...
38 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Find better friends
>>
>>17849327
Learn to rely on yourself for big things and it won't matter if your friends are nice or not. The whole point of having friends is to have people to hang out for lunch on the weekends.
>>
>>17849457
I have learned, but I don't like it like this

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My mothers friend and I have been talking dirty for a long time. We've exchanged nude photos to pleasure each other before, as well as talking dirty. She's sent me beautiful pics of her vagina and bare ass. She said I can fuck her if I help her achieve her fantasy. She wants me to fuck her, then creampie deep inside her. Then she wants me to open my mouth while she queefs and pushes it into my mouth. I'd love to fuck her but following this seems to be kind of gross. I'd have to taste my own cum after it's been in her. Is this worth it? Is this weird...
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>>17849273

depends how desperate you are. me, im not desperate at all, i dont even have to perform oral on my partners.
>>
>>17849286
>have to
shows how vanilla you are whiteboi, real men eat their bitches out as a reward for being good toys to me.

However, I wouldnt do something disgusting as OP is about to do.
>>
Cum doesn't taste that bad as long as you eat veggies and such. Vagina doesn't taste bad either. Source: huge faggot.

The fantasy is probably weird by women's standards but is fairly normal by bdsm-type standards so take that as you will. It's intended to be humiliating btw.

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How to create a private society? I would like to select a few people that agree with my ideas, and work together in a political project. The point is that I have no money to invest, and zero previous experience.
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>>
Depends, what kind of political ideals are we talking about
>>
>The point is that I have no money to invest, and zero previous experience.
First, work on getting money. Then, get some relevant experience.
>>
>>17849267
start your pedo ring somewhere else, podesta

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Long story short, fell for a guy who seemed crazy for me at first. Several weeks pass, tables turn and it seems I'm doing everything in my might to keep this going, when I ask him why he doesn't care anymore all he does is reassure me that's not the case. By text.
It doesn't help that I've never been so close to anyone and that we have mutual friends. I've been told he was a womaniser, but he said he changed for me. His lies were too sweet, I am but weak, 4chan.
Any questions I'm happy to answer

>Tl;dr how to get out of a semi toxic relationship with as much dignity possible, given I lost a lot being so naive?
Or just tell me about how your relationships died down
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>>
More info needed... How old are you? How do you know this is love?
>>
>>17849263
You just move on
Don't text
Block him
And learn next time a guy sweet talks you you can see the signs

Ya got played
>>
>>17849263
I'm in the same boat kind of - mine was a slutty girl i fell for hard.
All i can say is end it before you get in deeper and it breaks up worse than you can imagine and drag the rest of your life down.

Although, maybe he's telling the truth, maybe it'll work, and maybe you're going to throw away the only chance of true happiness

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How do I make friends in a new city? I'm on 4chan so obviously I'm not the most social person, but would still like to have a few m8s to do shit with like go to sporting events, out for a drink, or to go fishing with, etc. I know there are onling dating sites but I'm not really looking for a serious relationship. I get along with co-workers, but work in the trades so most of them are knuckle-dragging hillbillies who I don't care to be involved with outside of work.
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>>17849225

Which city is this?
>>
>>17849225
If you have a hobby google groups near you that meet up. Probably your best bet.
>>
sell drugs

Hey /adv/, physics major here (who's gonna fail heat and waves).

I've been looking into what I can do with a physics degree and my future seems bleak. It seems where all the money and jobs (I mainly care about the job aspect) are in engineering. I've also been looking for online resources to teach myself engineering skills so as to broaden my job opportunities.

This is going to be the end of my first semester, third year, so its too late to change anything...
I just wanted some advice on what I should do and on what to read on.
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>>
Why are you only now looking into what you could do with your tens-of-thousands of dollars investment? Especially if you "mainly care about the job aspect"?

My only advice (and it's completely serious) is that you should consider suicide
>>
If you don't have the engineering degree, you're not going to be hired as a full engineer right off the bat unless you have the right connections.

You're probably going to start as a junior engineer, or something below that, which is a totally possible path with just about any degree.


Try to worry about your current studies, if you're not doing well at something, you don't need to veer off track to pursue some side stuff. Get through what you're going through and make yourself look the best you can. Figure out any kind of projects...
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>>17849208
Learn Chinese. I just graduated in biochemistry and the only full-time jobs that responded to my applications were in China. I'm hoping to go there soon, fuck being NEET.

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Okay there's this guy I've been talking to and we live an hour apart from each other. He's nice and all but recently he keeps sending me snaps to come cuddle with him, which is cute and all but we haven't met in person before. I think the thought of it is nice but it's a little off putting the way it's blatantly brought up. I'm not quite sure what to say I guess?
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>>17849200
He wants to fuck you
>>
My advice is that you should learn to better formulate your questions so that others can provide you with relevant advice.

As it stands your question is more of statement and there's no answer to it. What you should say depends on how you feel, which you didn't really make clear. Either say you want to fuck him or that he should slow down until you've met in person. I hope this helps but I have no idea if it will because you're not quite sure how to post questions I guess?
>>
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>>17849254
Reeeeeee

Hello /adv/.
After a series of unfortunate events in my life I decided to commit suicide by hanging.
Can you please provide me with advice how to properly do it with minimal pain and without leaving a big mess to clean up for the rest of the family?
47 replies and 5 images submitted. Click here to view.
>>
Having the air chocked out of you is pretty painful and your body will most likely act because basic survival instincts.

Best thing to do is take a lot of numbing drugs to minimize pain, and make sure you take a shit and piss before you die, cause all thats gonna come out when you start turning blue.
>>
>>17849210
Is it possible to break your neck from a long drop to avoid the pain?
>>
>>17849233
Sure that's literally how public execution by hanging was meant to work.

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This story could be long. But I’ll try to keep it short.
Basically I spent way too much time with this one chick. I was planning to make a move and when I finally said to myself “Ok, she is worth the try”, she hits me with a “I’m going to try to make it work with my ex”.
I once fell from a 2 story building, broke my leg and my arm and even cracked my skull. Her words gave so much more pain than that… I’m still shaking.
I panicked, I stupidly tough to myself “Well If she is telling me, it is another way of saying, make your move fast, I’m almost...
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>>17849125
You're either delusional or a really good troll
I expect a lot of replies either way
>>
I know that. Not a troll just a very sad dude.
Opinions!!!!
>>
she won't be your gf
if you can handle seeing her with another dude you can be her friend, if not cut contact

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if you had a chubby/borderline gf, would you prefer her staying that weight or lose it and risk having saggy boobs and stretchmarks?
25 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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*chubby/borderline FAT
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>>17849119
I used to be fat so I'd prefer her to lose the weight. If she isn't that chubby she should be fine. Tell her to lift weights and that little muscle she puts on will fill in any potential loose areas.
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I'd want her to lose weight.

File: 1480631913424.jpg (34 KB, 500x376) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1480631913424.jpg
34 KB,
is a six inch cock too small
15 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17849104
For most girls to want yea
For most girls to deal with no it's aight
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>>17849121

What about when combined with 6 inch girth?

My cock looks so small when I jerk off but my ex could barely take it
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>>17849121
well that fucking sucks


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