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File: 1469570435168.png (209 KB, 320x300) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I need help guise
My gf was sexually assaulted by her hick cousin a few years ago. Under the state's law it happened in, sex crimes against any person under the age of 16 has no limit. I want her to report the fucker to the police, get a trial started, since her shit parents didn't do anything, since her dad is a hick himself, he didn't think it to be a big deal. What do? She doesn't wanna do anything, and it's out of pure laziness. Do I go behind her back? Do I pressure her? Do I buy a gun and shoot the fucker myself?
>Inb4 kys
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If you have proof everything could work out your way
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>>17464429
Girls pull this shit all the time. They say they were sexual assualted so you shower them with princess attention. But they always have an excuse why not to report the crime despite the fact that if they just say rape or sexual assault the dudes in jail for 48 hours and cops will believe anything she says.

Just ignore it. Even if she was assaulted you need to respect yourself enough do what needs to be done.
>>
Yes because a girl who was actually sexually assaulted wouldn't go to the law immediately. Fucking cunt is lying trying to get attention.

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>go skydiving and diving
>never felt fear
>3.8 GPA
>never excited before writing an exam
>see cute girl
>want to talk to her
>FULL PANIC MODE
>cant think straight
>dont know what to say
>1000 ifs and whats aa re running trough my head
>she...
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Why did you include your gpa in your story you autist? What does that have to do with anything?
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>>17464428
Just go to parties faggot. No one has to know you don't like them and it's 10000% harder otherwise.

Other than that, join a hobby, do interesting things, grils are bound to be there. If you want to get grils you can't act all high and mighty even though you're some virgin cuck.

It's the sad truth lad. Get gud and good luck. You're obviously smart and interesting in SOMETHING.
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>>17464447
Also, if you're 25, you're probably well out of undergrad so all the easy ways to meet people in college are essentially gone. So, I reiterate my party idea. GO TO THEM!!! Just tag along with any chad friends you have.

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I don't know what to do next. I'm so anxious, I hate everything.. I don't know if i'm ready for the real world yet. I was in special ed throughout all of school. I'm living with semi-senile parents. I've been sitting on my computer for the past month or so and I can't figure out how to move on. I don't even have my license yet. I'm going to college I guess.

All I want to do is sit at my computer. How fucked am I? I also asked out a girl and got rejected, and as an ENFP this has led me into a downward spiral of depression. I...
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>ENFP
>This Mayers Briggs bullshit isn't gonna die, is it?

OP, for someone in special ed and your family, you sound quite normal.
Read this first for motivation (I know the site is shit, but this article sums it all up): http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-harsh-truths-that-will-make-you-better-person/

My personal advice: Shut down your computer, plug it off and put it in a box far away. Then go outside, talk to REAL people and sit on a bench until you figure out, what really interests you. Then come back here.
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>>17464423

get out more.

Growth comes from suffering. even suffering as minimal as getting off the computer.
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>>17464465
Okay, I'm feeling motivated now. How do I deal with my semi-senile parents then?

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I'm deciding between majoring in Petroleum Engineering, or something with Renewable Energy Engineering.

At the moment, I would like to do my Bachelor's in America, then get my Master's in Norway since they have tuition free university for even international students. I would get my Bachelor's there, but they only have about 5 courses for Bachelor's taught in English. I plan on taking Norwegian Language Courses while I'm there too.

I planned on moving to Norway sometime in my life, & I've heard that it's almost impossible...
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Just out of curiosity, have you ever been to Norway (or any other scandinavian country) OP?
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>>17464420
I actually haven't, but I have family in Sweden & very close friends of my parents moved to Norway a couple of years ago.
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>>17464408

You should major in Chemical engineering, the petroleum industry will still hire you and your major won't be so niche that you'll be locked into a boom/bust.

It'll also help you transition into renewable energy if your economic situation changes.

Just look what classes the industry wants you to take.

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Sorry, I would've posted this at 420chan, but I wanted a response sometime before 2017.
Relative newbie to sniffing drugs, I've done small bumps of cocaine but never really got high much. Most recently I've done Molly, but the same thing happens every time. I end up just sneezing it all out and being congested the rest of the night instead of high. What am I doing wrong? Not sniffing hard enough? I heard you can snort too hard and end up swallowing it anyways. Please help.
In b4 drugs are lame and I'm a degenerate fuckbag and I should...
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I thought this was funny.
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Don't do drugs
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>>17464406

You are too hsitant in your snorthing.

Snort hard, close the other nostril with a finger, don't sneexe the powder away or your friends will kill you.
After snorthing once, keep sniffing to keep it inside

You WILL get nasty drugslime coming from your nose down your throat, this is normal.

420chan is still a better board for slayer than here, even if response times are slower

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How do girls feel about former drug addicts? How do you guys feel about drug addicts in general?
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i dunno, every person is different in how they act and deal with addiction.

i'm currently dating a recovering alcoholic. i like him enough to stick around, i used to smoke 420 every day for over two years until i moved down closer to where he is and my best friend. i've been mostly clean now that we are dating, since i know it's a big thing that their significant other be clean too.

i have a lot of empathy and he says i have a lot of patience and that i'm so good to him. i know it can be hard on the person recovering, the loneliness, how they...
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I think that's great that you were able to overcome that, but I don't think I could ever date someone who is. My dad was an addict, and I'm basically a teetotaler in terms of all drugs.
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>>17464336
Sad. Drugs are way overrated, nothing but a poor substitute for real achievement.

Go out and do something to find profound happiness. Best drug there is.

Remember: Work is its own reward.

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My bipolar girlfriend and I have been living together for a year as of this October, and it's been rough. For the first six months it was fight after fight after fight followed by making up, etc. Got better for a while, but recently she has been depressed and she went on Wellbutrin because the doctor doesn't understand she wants something different. She got mean, hateful, weepy, etc. Same stuff as in the first six months.

For a while, I've been complaining about having no friends. Well, there's a local place where they play tabletop RPGs and I wanted to check it out. Also wanted to try playing online. Since I decided I was going to do this, she's been crying nonstop. I've got a game of D and D on roll20 in three hours and she went to her sister's after crying all day. She told me to find a game today since I spent the weekend taking care of her, then she got sad again. It's at the point where I'm not sure I could enjoy the game tonight or the event tomorrow that they call "Tabletop Tuesday". She rarely wants to do anything, and she doesn't like video games (though she did play some in the beginning) or anything else, really. I bought Game of Thrones Monopoly at her request hoping that would give us something new to do together that involves staying home, but we played twice and didn't finish the first game. We watch Netflix, but she gets bored with that too.

I quit my job to take care of her because of some badness that happened early this year, and now I'm wanting to get another one.

All in all, she's doing better, but I need some way to convince her (and I do everything for her) that this isn't some huge change, I just want a friend or two to talk Trek or play vidya now and then.


She kept saying before she went that she wanted me to play and have fun, but it made me feel so awful, I'm not sure how that will work. I took a mg of klonopin a few minutes ago, and about to light up while creating my character, but I just don't know if I'll be able to have fun.
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I love her, and I know she loves me, but how do I make her understand that having a friend or two won't change that.

She's older than me by nearly six years. I'm 26 as of May, and she'll be 32 in October two days after our first anniversary. She's been married three times and she's constantly paranoid I'm gonna leave. Sometimes she shuts down and says she's leaving (happened several times, breaks my heart every time) or yells at me, calls me names, etc. I've done some yelling and lost my cool a few times too, but usually after...
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>>17464326
In the words of the great Nelson Algren,

Never eat in a place called Mom's, never play poker with a guy called Pop, and never fuck anyone crazier than you are.
>>
So yeah, how do I convince her having a couple of friends isn't some first step to me leaving her?

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Is free will a meme?

I don't like who I am, but I feel like it's impossible for me to change it. I can't help but feel lazy and unmotivated about doing my job. I can't stop feeling insecure and anxious. It feels like the harder I try to "will" myself out of these things, the worse they become.

Anyone here been able to better themselves?
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>be mentally ill (depression)
>be surprised you can't get over it on your on

Look up the symptoms of depression. If it sounds like you, go to a doctor.

To answer your question: yes, you can change yourself. It's hard, but possible. It's REALLY hard if you're depressed.
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>>17464306
I started getting treated for depression when I was 13, I'm currently 20.

I'm on Citalopram, which helps me not be an anxious wreck, but I still feel like shit. Therapy e.g. CBT never did anything for me.
>>
>the antidepressants meme

Holy shit, when did people become so lazy and gullible that they believe simply taking a pill will fix their lives?

OP, you need to fix your life. Get a hobby. I'd say start lifting, and also put your feelings into writing or literature. Also, go out and try meeting people. Talk to girls at work or get Tindr. And if your job is really bringing you pain, quit.

Try to do this daily: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zD-3j2g9w9U

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I just broke up with my girlfriend of 1 year last night and I just can't stop thinking about good memories, such as hanging out last summer, the times talking hours on the phone, going on our first couple dates. How do I stop thinking about these memories? I want to stop thinking about her.
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>>17464287

Come back if you're still obsessing over her in a year.
>>
Day by day.
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>>17464287
you're gonnna carry that weight

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Any good studying techniques for someone who's never studied in his life?

High school was piss easy so I've literally never sat down and studied and I start Uni tomorrow. I am studying Japanese on my own, but I only do my Anki reps everyday and read visual novels or something for that.
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Study engineering and don't waste your time with Japanese crap. Seriously stop wasting your time and money with shitty degrees.
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>>17464276
>Study engineering and don't waste your time with Japanese crap
Japanese isn't my major. I'm getting a Math degree with intentions on going to graduate school and becoming an astrophysicist.
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>>17464279

A math degree is useless. Fucking idiot.

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The 21 days have passed I still have feelings for her deep down but I have also been happier. Should I message her?
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>>17464247
>But when you catch yourself thinking about me or feel the urge of talking to me, just get a piece of paper and write it down. After 21 days burn the papers and re asses your feelings for me
>re asses
Mild kek
But yeah, what the fuck is this? Are you trying to summon Chad the Incubus for her? What did you do to make her give you an instruction manual of weird shit to accomplish? Are you both from /x/ or something? I'm genuinely curious.
>>
>>17464311
Friends for 6 years was in love with her for 3 of those 6 years we had a thing in high school. Told her my true feeling for her and she just walked away 2 days later she texts me that. The 21 days have passed.
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>>17464321
The friend zone is forever, not 21 days.

DD thread.
How to get out of this shit?
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>>17464246

what? explain your actual problem
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>>17464252
Dungeons and dragons man! How do I get out?
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Are you saying you're in too deep?

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Without describing the story in too much detail, a few years ago I had my first and only 'relationship' - inverted commas because we were never boyfriend and girlfriend, even though we did everything that romantic partners would do. We both made mistakes. For my part, I was too much of a coward to tell/show her how I felt, and was pretty inactive during the relationship, which I obviously regret now. For her part, she treated me like pic related, and dumped me in quite a shitty way. I know it's getting more and more common now so maybe I shouldn't be surprised,...
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>>17464228

That pic.

Doesn't say genders but we all know...
Clever. Adding it to my /r9k/ + /pol/ folders, especially for threads about why men or millenials aren't interested in dating as much.

Thank you.
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>>17464354
I don't know, I wouldn't be surprised if men use the same sorts of excuses to have a few girls on the go at once. But I'm not really experienced enough in dating to know for sure.
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>>17464354
It isn't wrong though...
we see the very same thing here in this board everyday

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>Friends with girl
>Super neglectful towards her
>not on purpose, just for some reason I'm just kinda forgetful with her. Constantly break plans because I just forget I made them
>Happens with no one else but her
>She's fed up with it and says she doesn't wanna be my friend anymore

I like being around her. I honestly don't know why this happens and I'm scared as hell.
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>I don't know why are you still drag this out. You have made this a bigger deal than what it actually is. It is very, very clear to me now that there is something wrong with you. And no amount of bitching to people who don't even matter to you is going to fix that. You need to go see your doctor, go see a therapist come get medicated. And start fucking dealing with your own problems. I'm tired of you treating me like I'm your fucking doormat, like your shrink, with you constantly inviting me to your stupid ass pity parties. You have...
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She's still insisting on this...
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She is right, you are a loser faggot and she deserves to be treated better. She had enough of your crap and made a better decision. See a therapist, maybe when money is going out of your pocket can you focus faggot.

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I have so many options to how I should ask her this chick out but I wonder which one's the best and how I go about to doing it.

I knew a certain girl back in high school but I never talked to her at all. I think we had a class or two together, and we acknowledged each other but never talked. I used to have a small crush on her though and added each other of Facebook a while back.

Well, 3 days ago or Friday, I seen this girl again at an event, full of teens and dudes in their early 20s, lots of drinking. I didn't know any people at the party but like 3...
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She had a curfew? How old is this broad?
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>>17464217
20. She had to do stuff the next day so she set it.
>>
Another party soon, you don't want to seem desperate. Don't reintroduce yourself and play it light. Tease her a bit and make her laugh, bring condoms if something happens.

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How do I eat pussy?

I want genuine help from genuine people, no porn star shit.

Thanks
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it's not that hard
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Literally like this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_l3XZgR686I
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>>17464211
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1PpH2TISFUc

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Can some anons help me out understanding girl behaviour?

Why is it some girls that you're talking to don't reply to requests? I'm taking about messaging each other like normal, and then asking to meet up or something and then they just don't reply/ignore that message. They reply to subsequent messages.

I mean I won't get mad if you're not interested, the not replying thing bothers me the most. Why do they do this???

I had a girl who was nice and direct and told me she wasn't interested in me romantically and that was...
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They are probably not interested and don't want to hurt your feelings lmao
>>
Justified or not, most women learn that if you reject a guy straight out, he will harrass you in some way or another. They also learn that if you string men along, they will remain polite/on good behavior indefinitely, since they think they still have a shot until they quietly give up.

Its a shame.
>>
>>17464381
Yeah I get this, my ex and several girlfriends have told me this before. It still annoys me though, because in most cases I'd say both parties would be better off if y the girl stated what's on her mind.

>>17464402
I guess this makes some sense. Seems rather selfish though. I know once a girl has told me no I just stop because there's plenty of fish. Sure a guy will be sad for a bit but most get over them soon enough.

The stringing...
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I want to extend my patio.

I recently bought a little ground-level condo, about the size of a two bedroom apartment,

the back porch is just a little concrete slab about a foot off the ground. Then there is about three feet of uneven dirt extending out to a retaining wall and a thirty foot dropoff.

I'd like to put in some paving stones or something around the concrete slab, so I have a little "shelf" to put planters and whatnot on.

Then the patio itself can be used for chairs, a little BBQ, etc.

Any suggestions?

I was...
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I should add, I've never done any kind of project like this before.

The men in my family were completely incompetent when it came to handyman stuff, so I don't want to ask their advice.

If my idea sound idiotic, please tell me what I am doing wrong. That's why I am asking. Hopefully some handier anons on here can set me down the right path.

Oh, hey, my captcha is "pancakes"

Most delicious capctcha ever.
>>
I'm not much of a handy person but I don't think I'd use sand, because it's gonna settle and make your paving stones uneven and unstable. you're probably going to want to pour concrete.

I would also run your plan by /diy/ if you haven't already and see what they think.

and make sure you call the city before you do it and find out if you need a building permit or not.

good luck OP, I'm gonna go look for some red green reruns on youtube or something. I miss that show.
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>>17464223

thanks, anon!

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not sure what to do now I'm 19 this girl I dated for 3 years dumped me in may and fucked two people including a 28 year old and then she came back and she has been fucking me a lot and now she says her period is late and she's saying she's pregnant and is taking about how she's going to take child support from me and all this other shit I have made my life better the last couple months but this makes me wanna fucking kill myself because i cannot stand the thought of being tied to this bitch for life and her retarded fucking family not to mention my parents...
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oh and the girl is 18
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Should have used a condom. Sure they were overpriced but they fucking work but no idiots like you want to raw dog girls.

Enjoy the consequences dumbfuck because life will be a lot harder now than before.
>>
Your own fault for taking her back retard. It's most probably not your kid anyway, she just came back as she got knocked up by some loser who won't pay child support.

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Long story short I asked my gf if she would peg me and now she thinks I'm a closet homosex when I'm not what do I do I think I freaked her out a bit she isn't replying to texts as she normally does etc
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>>17464168

wait it out. if she comes around you talk about it and explain. you cant force her to understand
>>
find a new gf who isn't such a fucking normie
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>>17464176
Yeah for ex if were texting she'll just give shotty uninterested responses and jump to "dinner with family" or "watching movie with family" and it only started happening after I brought it up. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens.

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All my life I wanted to become a professional musician. I have written songs, and work hard to improve my musical skills. The only problem is, is that I'm too scared to perform. I always feel like the music I make isn't good enough. Like every other musician is better than me, and that I'm just a scrub. I've never ever even showed my songs to anyone, especially not my family and friends. Because I think they will just say it's good, even if it's pure shit.

Has anyone else had this problem? I see other musicians performing, and building up...
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I'm a musician too. I performed for my high school, and a couple of short sets with a band as well. I record alone now. I get anxiety but you just have to man up and do it. Singing is freeing. Record some stuff, put it on soundcloud, get validation from that.
>>
Cut the crap man, get a degree or learn a trade like the rest of us. This hippie musician life style doesn't pay the fucking bills.
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>>17464266
I am working on getting a degree in music. Music is one of the few things that makes me happy. I want to do everything I can to make a living with music. Until that time I work as a bartender. Because I have to pay for music school.

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I'm hungry as shit and I just found a bunch of Quaker Instant Oatmeal packs in my cupboard. However, the expiration date on them is in 2014... Should I try eating one or is this a terrible idea?
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Bump, I'm dying of hunger here
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>>17464210
It's Grain, how bad can it be? Just smell it, does it have green shit in it? Then dont eat it.
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>>17464216
That's what I was thinking, but I'm not particularly fond of diarrhea so I thought I'd ask. It smells pretty much okay and has no weird shit in it, so I guess I can eat it?

So I made the stupid mistake of accidentally taking a dirty shirt to work today and I decided to chat up a cute girl. Things where going well until I guess she caught a whiff, then I noticed her face. Up until that point I thought I was fresh.

We ended the conversation on an okay note but I saw her several times later and we said nothing.

My first reaction is to drop it completely, but I'm just angry with myself over something so simple.
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Prove it was a mistake by showing up in mind condition for a week

if you chat again, bring it up and laugh it off
>>
Don't talk to her, play cool and be fresh until the time she talks to you again.
>>
That sucks anon but you should pay more attention to your hygiene, your body odor and the clothes you wear.

Just don't let it happen again, make sure to smell good everyday from now on and she'll eventually notice you actually care about your hygiene and will forget that or dismiss it as one bad day.

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Are there any cell phone apps, or websites, or anything for making friends?

Like "I want to go to the beach right now, find people in the area who also want to go"?
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Please respond, I'm so lonely I'm going insane.
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I think tinder could work but state that it's just platonic relations you are looking for. I have heard of one called meetups, but I don't know too much about it. There are also just good old fashioned singles clubs that plan monthly events.
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>>17464125
Learn to enjoy stuff by yourself, a few years ago I decided that my friends wanting or not to do stuff shouldnt dictate if I do stuff or not, the philosophy is never do nothing with other people you wouldnt do by yourself(there are obviously exceptions but not as many as youd think)

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There's a girl, let's call her Lily. I'm Daniel.

Lily has been in my class since fifth grade. She's not the prettiest girl but is pretty toned. She has known me for almost a decade now, and you could call us good friends. We're both kind of socially introverted and prefer to hang out with people who share our views. That's how we both met and became friends.

I'm a virgin, and I know that she's too. I'm the closest thing she has had for a boyfriend and we've been watching a movie together every sunday afternoon...
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>>17464104

Now, I WANT TO have sex with her. I have no clue what to do, though. What should I even wear to her house? How do I confirm the time? I've decided to wear anything that makes me look good and to just call her and ask her if I can come over.

How should I initiate it? Should I go straight for PIV or should I go down on her first? Should I ask her to give me a blowjob? Also, how sensitive are nipples, really? I'm afraid I might bruise it or something because I don't think I'm going to...
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she's a slut, don't do it OP.
>>
Wear normal clothes, don't try to hard.

Deodorant and a shower before you head out. Very important but go to the pharmacy and buy anti-bacterial soap for your balls. This will allow them to be clean and smell fresh when it is time ot plow. Buy condoms as well.

Kiss. Slowly take off each other clothes. Foreplay by kissing parts of her body, thighs, tits, stomach, and then start eating her out when she is wet. After that let her blow you, get some lube and then fuck her missionary style. After you cum, start kissing each other again and get her to do a hand...
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>going into my third year of uni
>been offered by dream job the second I finish for £35K a year
>have everything a 21 year old could want
>money
>family
>close friends
>great upbringing
>secure future
>free time
>crazy good camera for filmmaking

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>>17464088

stop being a baby and ask her out. you ahve to play to win
>>
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>>17464088
For what it's worth I sincerely hope you kill yourself normalfaggot.
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>>17464092
but if she says no im worried I will act irrationally. i realise im not being helpful here

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Hey, /adv/, I have a story. At the end of the story I really want some advice. I posted on /b/ first, they didn't really give good advice. Who would have guessed.
Just skip to the last post if you don't care about story. Questions there. Using same OP picture.

>be me, be 10, 2005, my uncle asks if I want something, I say, "sure" and he crushes it
>explains it's a meme, shows me card crusher, shows me pringles giraffe thing
>says it's the best thing...
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>>17464037
I didn't want to do any of that weird stuff, my sis could get hurt/scared, so my plan was to explain to her how fucked up I was and just hope she would understand.
>around this time, stay up for 3 days at a time, so fucking out of it, don't care about anything
>post more pictures on TSChan, last picture in set, censor, save, post, go to bed
>wake up in the morning, see "are you sure you want to save?" message...
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>>17464038
>everything goes quiet, I see a SWAT team rushing around my house, homeland security patches on them
>they sit me in a chair, after a few seconds my hearing comes back, "Do you understand?"
>blank stare at guy
>realize he is holding a paper that is a search warren and that he just read me my rights
>nod even though I didn't hear any of it


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>>17464041
Probably to cover their ass in case they killed someone.
>get to police station, pee
>driven to 'intake', first jail experience
>go to court within however many days, get another date
>lawyer comes and visits me, "I'm the lawyer that they assign when they want people to take a plea bargain"
>shows me stack of papers, it's evidence...
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My fucking retard uncle thinks he can get away with stealing all of my grandma's possessions again.
But not this time. I am going to polish the shit out of the staircase and his shoes and he's going to fall when he runs off like an obnoxious hyperactive faggot.
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Do you live in a fucking cartoon, anon?

And you didn't ask for any advice about anything. Are you wondering what kind of polish to use?
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>>17464031
Hello OP, i once used a spray to make latex clothing shiny in my bedroom, afterwards it became an ice rink and i was sliding into my bed everyday.
>>
make sure you add a banana peel, too.

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How to hack a twitter account?
9 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17464012

depends on the person, your relationship to them, and your resources.

no, there is no magic machine that just hacks twitter accounts for you.
>>
>>17464019
Well; I chat with that person a lot, it's an average person and I don't really mind in being stealth. What to do?
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>>17464046

that doesnt give us any context to your relationship or resources or the person.

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How do I increase my blood pressure for a day/temporary to pass a blood pressure test?

I have military health examination coming up (which will determine if I will be forced to do military service or not).
I have high blood pressure naturally which has gotten me through the examination 4 years in a row already but this year I cant take any chances because I landed a really high paying job.
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>>
LISTEN!!!

Nobody tell OP the answer so that he will be nervous as fuck during his exam and have high BP!
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>>17464021
I'm not telling
I'm taking the secret to my grave!
>>
>>17464011

Get lots of sleep.
Take B12 vitamin.
Eat dark greens.
Right before test, eat something high in carbs.


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