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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 593. page
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What does one do when you don't have a single soul to go to in a desperate time of need?

Aside from suicide.
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>>17448365

Soldier on to prove that you can make it. Or seek professional help if it feels like too much. Therapy isn't just for nutjobs, it can help in other crisis situations too.
>>
>>17448365
>Aside from suicide.
I'm out of ideas, then.
>>
>>17448365
Take it from someone who spent 8 months in solitary confinement, you just gotta power through it anon. This is what separates the boys from the men. Soon, you will enjoy the isolation.

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How often do people normally text the person they are dating? i dont know if i should be trying to text the girl i am dating every day or if i should just chill and text when i actually want to talk.
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>>17448358

Test the waters to see what your girl would prefer. If she's okay with whenever, then text when you want to. If she needs more attention than that, then try to come up with something every or every other day. It varies.
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>>17448368
thanks. atm she is really busy with work so we have been texting only a little.
>>
Me and my gf text every day. Some people (girls included) are frankly not that social and don't feel the need to talk every day. It depends on how social you are, and IMO most people in general are horribly disconnected and quite shitty. This doesn't make them bad people I guess, but not one I'd want to date or have a loving relationship with.
If you're not happy with her communication with you, communicate that.

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How you doing /adv/? I am a latino high school student, with above average grades, who next year is finally graduating. I have been looking universities to apply, and this one called Thompson Rivers catch my eye. The problem it's that it's a little bit expensive and I don't know if my parents would afford it. I made myself a goal to end my final year with excellent grades so they notice I'm not fooling around. I also consider to student loans. Any advice you want to give to not fuck up?
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Yes. Get your Mexican citizenship as fast as you can because once Trump is elected you're out of here. You can get a decent carpentry job or cartel job over there I hear
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>>17448256
You need to be 18 to post here.

Gtfo
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>>17448268
Actually I want to be computer engineer and the university the one I'm looking for is in Canada
>>17448269
I missed one year of school for some personal stuff, but yeah I'm 18 and will graduate with 19

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I'm tired of being school, and stopping where I'm at is looking more appealing.

I'm currently a Paramedic, and I work for a shitty private company. With a little effort, I could get hired on with a county agency and have a decent career. I wouldn't make a lot, but it would be enough for my family. I sort of enjoy being a Paramedic, but I'm not satisfied with some aspects of the job.

I'm working on becoming a nurse and it's just exhausting me. When I'm in school, I don't ever have time off. I don't get to see my...
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>>17448230

OP, finish your degree, get a commission. I'm in the Navy and from what I've read and hear our Nurse Corp is good living and good work.

Mind if I ask you your opinion of my current career? I'd really appreciate someone in your positions perspective.
>>
>>17448266

Sure. I'm not sure how much my opinion would count for anything since i feel lost right now but fire away.
>>
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>>17448314

Sorry for the delay, hope you're here.

I'm currently an E5 in the Navy and make about 52k before taxes. Some of my benefits include free healthcare/dental, 30 days of paid leave a year, cheap or free college, and the opportunity to retire and receive a pension after 20years, at which point I would be 39 years old and receive at least 32k a year in pensions until I drop dead. Sometimes I think I'd like the freedom of being a civilian again and going home to study and be close to family. Now...
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Any tips on being a good shot? Id post on /k/ but i would probably get memed on
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1.point
2.shoot

it helps using your dominant eye to point the rifle. theres also things on the top of the barrel called sights to help you point it.
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google "pistol correction chart targets." if you're using a rifle and not a pistol then I guess you'd google "rifle correction chart targets."

>download
>print out
>take to range
>shoot
>follow instructions on the part of the paper with the most bullet holes in it
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>>17448254
I worded that last bit wrong, what I mean is
>stop doing whatever it says on the part of the paper with the most bullet holes in it

How do i stop my girlfriend from being so depressed.

I dont want her to kill herself and my dumbass self not know what to do.
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Support her, remind her when she's in a slump that things feel terrible right now but it's not going to be like that forever. Get her professional help.
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>>17448176
meditate
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>>17448183
this is what i do and when i get more money soon i will take her to one, but i cant now since im broke as hell.
i know she said shes had treatment when she was younger like 16, 8 years ago, idk if it ever helped her.

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Hey /adv/ so I'm starting college soon and I'm pretty much new to the adult life in the real world. Right now it would be helpful if you guys could explain to me how credit works since I'm most likely going to start using it soon
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cred·it
ˈkredət/
noun
1. the ability of a customer to obtain goods or services before payment, based on the trust that payment will be made in the future.

>explain

You start out with neither bad or good credit. You ask a lender for money or goods and they "loan" to you. When you pay it, overtime your credit will become "good."

If you don't repay it, your credit will become "bad."

It's nothing more than your reputation (credibility) in regards to finance. The more you...
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You don't need credit or a credit card. I've never had one and I am very successful.
>>
Credit is just a way for the Jews to squeeze out more money from you then what you actually should pay. Pay for everything in cash up front. If you can't do it then don't do it.

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My work rides me so hard, I just spend my days off lying around.

I was gonna go to the park with rednecks today, but I'm half asleep right now.

My little sisters abandoned me, too.
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Quit working, you wagecuck. NEET life is best life.
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>>17448240

How the hell do you pay the bills if you're living The neet life?
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>>17448241
Well, I guess I'm not fully a NEET since I do work about 4 hours a week helping Chinese people practice their English over the internet. Housing is also very cheap where I live so it's enough to (barely) survive on.

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Recently, I joined a diversity committee at work. I currently work in a hospital, and there is a lot of data suggesting that focusing on certain races or cultures can help provide better care. For example, some of our medicines contain gelatin from pigs, so Muslims and Jews can't use that. Knowing that aides our hospital in becoming better for everyone.

Recently I was speaking with two women about the committee and they were laughing at me because I'm a white man. They said I couldn't contribute to diversity. I was kind of shocked and taken aback, so I...
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>>17448037
Bump. PLEASE don't make me ask pol....
>>
>I joined a diversity committee at work
> they were laughing at me because I'm a white man
>white man
>man
>diversity committee

Found your problem.
>>
>>17448037
You should absolutely tell them that, but don't expect it to go anywhere

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My parents and all my relatives hate me. Should I suicide? Grandmother say that " I am bastard child and my father is so stupid when he was young" , father say that I am ugly piece of shit and I always be stupid and poor without proper job , wife , friends. I just can't take it anymore and it's even worse I am in 3rd world shithole.
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if you really live in a third world shithole, then leaving your family and being homeless can't be that much worse than living with them, right? so leave home. try and find some place where you can do odd jobs and find somewhere cheap to live. save as much money as possible, get more skills, better job, better housing.
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>>17448341

Just don't come to the United States we're full.
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>>17448353
that plus our food is kinda bullshit. don't come here unless you want to get fat

>gf is a virgin
>very apprehensive about sex
>tried to have sex multiple times but nothing
>says it feels uncomfortable/hurts when my finger is inside her
>only enjoys external stimulation on the clit
>chickened out the 3 times we've tried because i couldn't get it in the first time, and it hurt her too much when i tried to get 2 fingers in

How do I do this? I focus so much on long drawn out foreplay to the point where she's really turned on and gets her in the mood, but will all of a sudden change her mind as soon as it starts to hurt and I don't know how we're gonna get past this stage
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>>17447954
Don't most girls find it painful the first time? She just has to deal with it.
>>
Vaginismus. Read about it. I'm getting tired of this shit.
>>
I'm super tight as well, no matter how turned on I am, I'm going to be tight as fuck until my boyfriend enters me. It was quite bad at first but it got much better with time.
I think your vagina accomodates with time, especially to my bf who is quite girthy.
I'll give you a few tips as I had a lot of problems with it at start.
The main advice for her is to bite her lips as you enter and deal with it. It helps a lot if you enter in missionary and she guides you in with her hand as you slowly thrust around the entrance. The worst part, where you feel...
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I'm 30 and I've been physically disabled for 5 years , but before the disability I loved being social and doing things outside, hanging with friends, etc.. When I became disabled I lost the ability to work and perform normal activities. The severe shift in lifestyle crippled my mind as well so now I'm anti-social etc. I live in PA and a part of PA where its mostly farm land with some small "cities" that are filled with undesirable people in many ways and this range extends across counties, but since the governmental housing I live in is here and my family...
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how are you disabled?
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>>17448184
Spine, neck, and leg damage. Mobility in almost all aspects is painful and very difficult. Uses cane and actually needs electric cart while shopping if that paints a better picture
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>>17448202
fug. idk bro can't help u. hang in there famalam

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I want to join the navy because I believe I have what it takes.. I’m very motivated to get my life together, to have order. I want to re-experience what NJROTC was like, even though I may have been slumping on the class for a little bit (not ironing uniform all the way through, forgetting general orders, not getting to squad leader rank, etc.(the bootcamp field trip was hell/fucking great)). I’ve been in special ed all through my school career, which has not been disclosed with ANY of my friends, or school peers out of shame (fire drills were the worst). In Junior year of...
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I’m 18, I’m fat (225lbs>), depressed, isolated, and I have ADD (hence special ed). I’m tired of having constant negative thoughts, I want order in my life. Hell, I don’t even have a car, license, job, or a viable plan for college. I've been on ADD medication in the 6th-7th grade, and that's it. The only other medication is Acne medication Doxycycline (which doesn't affect my mental state).
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>>17447917
No. If you're depressed now, the Navy isn't a magical drug that cures all your problems.
>>
>>17447938
I have enough willpower to do so though. I'm used to the feeling of sucking. I would be doing so for my own personal growth and I may be happy later on.

I'm right about everything. Ask me anything.
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Why is my boyfriend freaked out because I don't sleep with other guys while I'm totally okay with him being with other girls?

I would have thought that he'd be super cool with the arrangement but as time goes on he gets more and more nervous
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>>17447877

Because he's afraid that once he breaks the barrier of sleeping with other women, you will retaliate and might end up liking it, and then continue the cycle until it eventually gets to a point where you find a better man and leave him.
>>
How do I adjust for more lee helm in my Laser, assuming my mast rake and shroud tensions are accurate for the weather? I keep pinching when I'm steering a close hauled course.

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Why do a lot of people have the habit of abandoning you and disappearing just right around the time your life is in shambles and falling a part? Especially if you're a guy.
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Because unless they genuinely care for you people don't want to deal with other peoples' bullshit. Nor are they obligated to.

It might be especially true for guys, because they're given less sympathy when failing at handling their own bullshit.
>>
I'm going through the same thing. Going through a divorce, just lost my job, going deeper into debt by the minute-- it all sucks.

I'm a fun person to be around but I don't blame anyone for not wanting to be around my personal chaos. People say "I'll always stand by you" but they don't really know what that entails, or that it's a fucking drag, or they just don't have enough life experience to handle shit gracefully.

Go listen to Eric Clapton and write a personal ad or something.

https://youtu.be/0b-OHZI1Q5w
>>
>>17447858
Because any person, and a guy especially, should be able to take care of their burdens on their own.

Your friends, buddies, even family members are just that, not your personal army of wet nurses. They have their own problems, when you expect them to coddle you when they have lot of their plates too, they just leave.

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>text girl "would you like to go on a date sometime?"
>probably not the most suave way to ask, but she said yes, when she gets back from her trip with her parents
>text her, she replies only intermittently throughout the trip
>one day she just straight up doesn't respond to my "how's your trip going", that's our last communique
>4 months later (today), she randomly texts me "Hey! How've...
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She's in need of a dicking.
>>
She was busy on her trip, so didn't feel like wasting it messaging. Then when you never contacted her again, she felt awkward about it and it took 4 months before she finally decided to try.

Talk to her, ask her out again if you want to, but this time set a date and suggest a place. If she fades again, give up and move on.
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>>17447805
she probably met someone else or lost interest for what ever reason. she is probably texting you now because she is desperate. i could be wrong but this is what i think. good luck.

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How do I ask a doctor for a specific antidepressant by name without coming off like I've figured out a way to get high off it?
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You can't get high off antidepressants.
Just ask and be prepared for a good reason they're not going to give it to you.
>>
"I've heard about (insert drug here) and I think it could help me from what I've read."
>>
>>17447796
I know you can't. I just want my sex drive to stop. I just don't know how to ask for it sensibly.

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Just went through a break up with the girl that I thought I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.
We went to high school together, was high school sweethearts. Went through 2 years of being 5 years apart in college. Still visited each other though.
Now I'm going to university and she is going to a school that is now an hour or less away.
Things were looking up.

A month before we each go back to school she breaks up with me. Says that she wants to just be single. She says she has no interest in other guys and she even keeps wearing the promise ring I...
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Easy for me to say, but you know, just gotta move on and work on improving yourself.

Me personally I probably would not take her back because she's already moved on - girls tend to do this faster than men for some reason.

You on the other hand will go through a crippling depression for months. Don't do that.

Just work on other stuff and if she comes back maybe she'll have realized what she lost (you never know what you've got til it's gone). By then hopefully you'll have moved on.

There's plenty of fish in the...
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>>17447773
Breakups are tough. But you need to realise the relationship is over. Its in the past. Look to the future, your own future as an individual. Moping isn't going to get you anywhere.
>>
>>17447786
Seeing her or hearing about her with other guys is absolutely a devestating blow.
I mean, I can't even think about being with another girl right now.
My mind is racing back and forth of shit like just move on a get with other girls. It's honestly not going to be that hard. But on the other hand I don't know if I can make myself do this.

And I KNOW without going into paragraphs of explaining on why I know this, but I know she is going to come back.
But I know it will be too late. Even...
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How come I was

>put in daycare since month 3
>physically punished by my parents a lot
>left alone and told to grow up and be independent and not bother my parents during their personal time (unless there was a good reason to) so as not to be a burden since early childhood

And I still managed to grow up into a happy, satisfied adult with a good relationship with my parents and people in general and a loving bf while the anons on here seem to be failures who can't...
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You got shit on in your last thread. Stop posting you frigid autistic cunt. Fortunately you're so undesirable no man with a stable career would choose you, so you don't have to worry about having kids who will interrupt your hobbies.
>>
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>OP is this angry at anons on an African drum beating forum because they don't validate her feelings
>>
>>17447763
Nigger please, your pathetic jealous shitposting is only funny.

>Fortunately you're so undesirable no man with a stable career would choose you
Except that's wrong but stay mad virgin neet.

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>Have fwb who is pretty much my gf
>She sleeps over for 3 days
>Didn't see her shower or brush her teeth once
>mfw
>Start noticing her breath is sorta rank this morning
>Jokingly suggest she takes a shower, since suggesting brushing your teeth is probably much more offensive
>She says she sometimes goes a few days without showering

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If you're fucking like rabbits, not showering for three days is pretty gross. But just going a few days without a shower doesn't mean much if it's not hot and you didn't physically exert yourself. Showering daily is more a social habit than necessity. Soap etc removes the natural oils from your skin, so if you shower daily with soap then go a day without a shower, you'll get more "dirty" than someone who is used to not showering daily, or only rinsing daily with water... so it's not like if someone is used to showering every other day...
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I tell my girlfriend this sometimes, like when she's trying to kiss me. I just say, "sorry babe, but your breath's kinda smelly."

She'll be kinda sad and offended obviously, but she's horny so she'll go and brush her teeth and we'll do the sex after.
>>
>>17447741
How clean is your bathroom?

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There's a great prices Mazda B2300 that id get in a heart beat so long as everything checked out fine, mechanically.

My question is, it's a '97 with only 46,000 miles on it. From the pictures the engine, exterior, and interior look great but how in the hell does a truck that's almost 20 years old only have 46k on it? Is this too good to be true?

>KBB estimates an average of 156k on this year of truck
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well they may have rolled back the odometer.
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>>17447739
those little trucks were either driven to shit because they were too poor to afford anything else, or have low miles because they were the truck parked in the back yard that they brought out when they had to move something or their car was in the shop.

The 2.3l engine is really weak, and it's even more noticable if it's paired with a manual transmission.

Make sure the speedo works, and the odometer works too while you're at it. And if it's one that doesn't have a reading beyond...
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>>17447754
Yea, I have a 92 ranger. The odo only goes to 99,999 after that it rolls over. It probably is 146k miles. But rangers are grandpa cars, it could have spent 10 years in a garage after the old man was too old to drive it.

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>want to buy bycicle
>go to bycicle store
>dude tells me i cant get a good mountainbike for 400 bucks
>haresses me with his knowledge about bycicles
>doesnt shut up
>tells me stuff im not interested in
>feeling tired and bored
>makes me feel like i'm an idiot with all his bycicle knowledge
>shows...
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>>17447734
How about craigslist, or a similar online forum/thrift shop?

Fuck that guy
>>
>>17447734
ask >>>/n/ about what would be the best bike for you.
>>
go to walmart and buy a brand new bike for 100 bucks

and if you get into the hobby and enjoy it, then see about getting a higher quality bike.

Or if your city has a public bike access program, they're usually pretty fair. Ours is 25 bucks for a years pass, and that nets me 2 hours of ride time per day.

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I'm kinda of of a newb in terms of mods but i want to go sub ohm just for more flavour.

I use an iTaste vtr on 2.1ohm it shoots out some decent clouds for what it is. My local guy is trying to get me to buy a Pico from him,

What do you think? I would almost just keep this thing but i want to smash some bigger clouds and get some more flavour.
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What are you even talking about. Are people who vape REALLY like this?
>>
>>17447698
this has got to be satire desu senpai. I just can't picture a subculture so smug and pretentious developing in just a few years

>3 year relationship
>break up 8 months ago (she was wanting to)
>contacts me every ~1.5 months
>we've talked on the phone. Goes good, even talked about and agrees with everything. Then no talking after.
>deleted from Facebook about 2 months ago. Sends me trivial Facebook message.

What gives? I know she feels bad about it. Although she contacts me for the most stupid reasons. I know she doesn't hate...
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>Even talk about our relationship*

Another random message
>>
Maybe she's trying to keep you in her back pocket possibly in case she's got no one else and knows you may want her back. Could be wrong of course but theres some food for thought
>>
Yeah she knows i wanted to work at it. I personally think she had someone lined up before leaving me (though I never mentioned it). Mainly it was miscommunication on both parta which kind of lead both not happy about things.

I've thought about being blunt amd asking why she contacts me. Maybe add its not that it's necessarily unwelcome..

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Is it normal for a man to have an index finger that is much longer than the ring finger?
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Yes.
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>>17447610
How much longer? Can I see?
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>>17447625

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/adv/, i was single for a looooong time and during that time i was very actively "online dating". Basically, my evening activity mainly was to chat with guys. I was really used to be able to talk to real people every night for hours. Now i have a bf since 10 months. I love him and we have a wonderfull relationship. However, he's in military and will be for atleast another year. Which means during weekdays he has no time for any contact. If i'm lucky, i get a short good night. Now my problem is that i'm really lonely and pretty lost at all those evenings...
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>>17447584
Couldn't those guys have just been friends? I'm a guy and I'm pretty lonely too, as a result I've made a fair few online friends - many female. They're just friends. We have nice chats and support one another as best we can over the Internet. If those guys were willing to talk to you for all that time and not pursue anything more from you, it sounds like they were just friends too? Granted, if you met them on dating sites, I guess that changes the dynamic a bit.
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>>17447596
Well, some truly have become friends. Some just live on the other side of this planet so a relationship was off the table. Problem is that i did do sexual things with all of them to some extend and at some point (sexting, sharing pics), since i was single anyways. so i do think it would have been weird to keep talking to them...
I didn't meet all of them on dating sites
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>>17447606
Oh and to add, i tried to talk to one guy as "just friends" when i was already dating my bf. At first it went very smooth but then he catched a feel and it became a huge shitfeast. I really tried to keep it on friendship-level but it didn't work

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Does any anons here deal with Irritable Bowel Syndrome?

I'm starting to believe that this has been one of my causes of GI issues over the past 3 years. I've had a endoscopy and a colonoscopy, and nothing was found. So I'm starting to believe this is all related to anxiety, and I'm assuming I have IBS. I have a appointment with my first Therapist tomorrow... Will the be able to help me?
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yes they will :) Therapists are great dude he will curb your anxiety bigtime.
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>>17447614

I hope that you're being serious... Cause that almost seems like something a troll would say.

But, I really hope you're right.
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I have it, and it's especially triggered by anxiety. When I know I'm going to be going through high anxiety moments (like a meeting with someone important scheduled a week from now), I eat less and drink a lot of water. I've also had to change my diet to way less processed food. I only eat really large meals after I've been awake 6+ hours (before that, I'll have something simple like a smoothie). If I'm having a big meal, I'll take some chewable pepto and eat it immediately afterwards.

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How do i use Snapchat and what is it actually?

Is it a messenger for only photos? i dont get it.

seems like everyone is using it
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It's like text messaging but with images. Most messengers do it, but this one is trendy and encourages risqué pictures, with a mechanic that deletes the picture after a few seconds and notifies the other user when you screen-captured it. It also has a 24-hour deletion snap that hosts images all of your friends can see. People use it like Facebook and feel that the "snaps" they're sending out are more interesting and have more sentimental value because they will be deleted after 24 hours. It's also cool and trendy because it's slightly more complicated...
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>>17447631
Wait so you will send it to everyone if you make that one picture?
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>>17447650
The 24 hour ones are available to everyone. The personal message ones disappear in seconds. It may be a little different than that, but that's the gist of it.

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Is it normal in a relationship for one person to love the other person more?

Like my boyfriend admitted to me that I love him more than he loves me. Is this okay? I don't feel very good about it.
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thats pretty much always how it is
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Yes, it's normal and happens in plenty of relationships. However, whether it's okay or not depends on you. Some people can make it work if there are other reasons to be in a relationship (like stability, security etc.), but generally unbalanced relationships end in a break up when the other person finally finds someone they can love fully.
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>>17447550
If you don't feel good about it, then it's not good.

Hello everyone,

I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend of almost 5 years, and after about 2-3 years of struggling to understand what is going on she found herself identifying with demisexuality.

My girlfriend enjoys having sex, and we used to have a lot of sex when we got together, but for the past 2-3 years she has had 0 interest in it whatsoever.

For a long time we thought it might be other things (stress, at one point she was ill, then I was ill, etc.), but with time we realized that no matter what our situation was her feelings are the same.

So...
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>>17447543
Demisexuality doesnt seem to play much besides the intro.

Unless she opens up its very hard to work with this. She sounds slightly depressed and conscious. Maybe try to clarify with her hiw you can help to relieve it? I mean, this is one of the challenges to developing a relationship, opening up and being clear on each others feelings. Try ti talk over her issues and reassure her but also make clear you miss making love and want her to enjoy it too.
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>>17447543
If my gf would stop having sex with me or she visibly didn't enjoy it, never got off, etc. I would not see a future in our relationship. We would not be sexually compatible and I don't think I could take this for more than a month, not even close to the 2-3 years of you.

Call me cynical, but a relationship without sex is a friendship. Cheating usually gets defined by being sexually unfaithful. However if you don't have a sexual partner in the first place then you can't be faithful. That's...
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>>17447559
I've talked to her about this many times and she says that she doesn't know what she could do to change things. Things have been very frustrating for her and I think she has hit a wall.

When we talked last she said that she feels that this issue will never be resolved and that I should just break up with her if I want to have sex.

>>17447583
After being years in a relationship with someone you love for year, and everything else being amazing...
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