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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 610. page
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I'm stuck in a loop of today like Groundhog day. This isn't roleplay, but I guess that's pointless to say. I've typed this up 4 times now but I'm hoping if I word things differently I'll get different replies.
So basically I woke up about 2 weeks ago and it was Saturday august 6, which was normal, but now every time I wake up the day just resets. At first I was confused, then understandably flipped my shit when I realized all my facebook conversations were gone from that day, texts, etc. I've watched the olympics a few times now to confirm...
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And yes I'm aware I may be just insane or in a coma or something, but there's really no way to confirm that because I can't see a fucking doctor because I can't make any appointments
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>>17436776
Lotto numbers?
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>>17436781
Does the lotto even draw on sunday? I haven't looked at it because it's pointless for me. I can tell you the volleyball results for today though since that's what I like watching.

Indoor volleyball pools sunday:
France > Italy
USA > canada
Russia > cuba
Brazil > mexico
Don't remember who won the other 2 games, didn't watch them yet

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How do you guys manage to sleep without drugs? The only feelings I get when sober and trying to sleep are restlessness, anxiety, and a very, very strong urge to go an hero.
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>>17436767
>The only feelings I get when sober and trying to sleep are restlessness, anxiety, and a very, very strong urge to go an hero.
But that's teh best time of day. I feel more suicidal when I wake up in the morning and throughout the day. Bed time is best time because I know that soon I'll drift into unconsciousness.
>>
Before you ever did drugs, you somehow slept without them.

I'd say your use of drugs in the first place is what has caused this problem.
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>>17436782
I get it... but, last night I dreamed that I was so depressed I wanted to kill myself, so the dream was only an extension of reality.

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Sup /adv/. My mom is constantly walking all over me and trying to control me. How do I make her respect me more and make her stop walking on me?
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>>17436747

Get a job, move out.
>>
Ignore, always put earphones
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>>17436747
Leave your parents house, get a job, and show your capable of surviving on your own.

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Has anyone here gotten Lasik and can tell me about their experience?
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It was the most terrifying thing I've ever had to do because I don't like shit near my eye but it is also the best thing I've ever done

.t right eye -5.25 left eye -5.00
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>>17436748
Did you use contacts before or just glasses? I used to be unable to touch my eyes until I forced myself to get comfortable with it because of contacts. I'm hoping it's not too bad because of this.
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>>17436751
Just glasses. If you can touch your eye, you'll be fine. I couldn't touch my eye and they had to give me extra sedatives because of how stressed I was.

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My boobs are 34DD and sag to my waist w/ nips pointing forward. They probably would be higher if they didn't start so low ( about an inch under armpit length if I pull them up).
Before you ask I'm not morbidly obese or anything, I'm a pretty normal weight. However, my weight has gone up and down these past few years which probably led to the excess skin on my tit leading them to sag. The only real way to fix them is to get a breast lift.
This is where the problem comes in. The scarring that occurs after the surgery looks pretty harsh, and even once it heals...
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Scarring should be minimal if you go to the right doctor.

Look up surgeries on how it's done. There's a guy on Snapchat called Dr. Miami that uploads all his surgeries in real time so you can see everything that's happening.
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>>17436730
Well, to be honest, the image you gave me mentally was a fantastic one, so I'm going to jack off furiously in the next 10 minutes. Thanks OP, this is totally worth my week of NoFap.

Anyway, 34dd and those sags ain't bad. Keep'em.
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>>17436730

I know you hear these a lot on the internet, but this time it seems wholly appropriate, and not just internet rudeness:

1) this post is worthless without pics
and
2) tits or gtfo

however, I say: leave your boobs alone

I am assuming that you can wear bras and swimsuits that put them up in the right place? If so, what's the big deal? No guy is going to complain about epic tits when they are out for his enjoyment, and if your normal clothes keep them where they're supposed to...
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Due to how many non-answers /g/ tends to give since they would rather insult anything asked, I've decided to come to you guys for advice.
Basically, I'm working with Unreal Engine 4. I wish to develop a game, as soon as possible, just because it's something I've always wanted to do. Problem is, I lack the knowledge of programming in C++. My question to you, /adv/, is this: What is the best way to learn C++ for game development for free? I'm 19, have no money, not in college yet and won't be able to attend until next semester at least, so taking...
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>learning c/c++ quickly

Toppest kek
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>>17436703
Not necessarily quickly, but as quickly as possible. I have previous experience learning programming, mostly in Lua, but it's been a while.
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>>17436685
Codeacademy

My advice though would be to start with a simple unity project in Java script

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My bf texted his ex at the beginning of our relationship. He told her that she has been on his mind but she said it wasn't mutual. Well a year after that he started looking up her pics (only pics, no info on her life) like maybe once or twice a week before he got caught. He also looked up two of his coworkers. He says he didn't miss her, want her back or anything like that, he just maybe wanted some attention.

Well yesterday we talked about it once again and I asked "if you really would have wanted her you probably would have said something like i miss...
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Anyone who tries to keep tabs on exs wants them on some level.
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Not only did he want his ex back, he STILL wants her back. If you have even the tiniest shred of self-respect, you won't stay with him
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>>17436652
>bf
>ex
Not even gonna read the rest
Break up. If your bf still has feelings for his ex there's no hope

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I quit my antidepressants early in June (Escitalopram, aka Lexapro), but I feel like it would be a good idea to get back on them. My main reason for quitting was I hated the neutral feeling I experienced on antidepressants, and I hated having to rely on a pill, especially when I felt that I was an absolutely normal person in just an excruciatingly difficult circumstance.

Right now I'm having trouble with some anxiety, insomnia, depression and manic symptoms that I can see continuing to become worse and worse and worse until they cause me to do something that I'll...
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For the past few days, coupled with my extreme insomnia, I've broken down on the couch because nothing of my situation makes sense. Like the fact that I've managed to escape just doesn't make sense to some part of my brain so I've been feeling like nothing is real and that I must be dreaming everything.

At this point Antidepressants make sense, but I'm worried that taking antidepressants will stop me from emotionally processing what I've gone through, and that I may have to stay on them for life.

I've gone through a lot of shit...
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Let me tell you something.

I've had over a decade of severe depression including phases of cutting, drugs, asphyxiation, suicidal thoughts and other things I deemed a 'vent' or numbing mechanism at the time. I still have contact to relatively close friends who suffer from life long depression etc.

One thing is clear: Anti depressants and any other psycho medication WILL ruin you in 99% of all cases. They are basically drugs that temporarily give you relief by re-adjusting the chemical imbalance in your brain, but make you fall ten times harder afterwards...
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>>17436697
Thank you. I've been thinking the same...

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My co-workers at my new job probably resent me now, and it has been only a month now.

It's not in my head, nor is it something that would subside later. A week after I got hired, the company hired a female and everybody seems to like her. It's not racism either... I was mainly hired to replace another guy since he was leaving for another store near him. He's the same race as I am and everybody liked him so much. One of our regular customers left me hanging in front of most of the staff when I tried to shake his hand. He's seemingly cool with most of...
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Why not read into topics that your coworkers find interesting so you can at least converse with them?
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>>17436585
Because most of them does not interest me. They all joke around and make each other slap their knees. I don't have that much of a sense of humor.
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>>17436560
Maybe they're just not used to the other dude being gone, anon. They probably do resent you based on the evidence of the one customer and your coworkers, as they probably want their old buddy back.

Good morning /Adv/

I am worried that I am in a failing marriage after 9 months of being married. (We've been together off and on for 10 years) He's a good man but shortly after I moved in a few months before we got married, he told me he had feelings for some chick up north. I told him he needed to sort out his feelings before he hit the alter, and supposedly he did.

>Being an idiot I married him
>Attempt to dress up in ways he claim to prefer, he just shrugs and goes back talking to women who hes...
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>>17436556
Seems that the answer is pretty clear OP.

What are you really looking for here?
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Please leave him before you have children together. I know you think divorce is a bad thing, but it's better than going through 35 years of unhappiness, debt, and children.
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>>17436558
I am just hoping to see if this is normal in a marriage. Divorce is high in my family and I didn't want to be another failed marriage. I don't have any kids (which at 28 is a record in my immediate family)

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i want to die

how do i do this

all is appreciated
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You don't
You keep going
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>>17436452
Try out old age
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OP, you'll have eternity to be dead, why not live for a little bit while you have the chance?

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As I've turned 18 I feel like my life is over. I'm 19 y/o now but this past year it's felt like everything I've done, everything I prepared for through schooling and the like has led up to this anticlimactic ending.

>pic related, i feel like everything shinji went through, in my circumstance was fast forwarded to this scene, right after the beginning of the first episode.

I feel like I'm just waiting to die now. I'm not depressed, and I know my death might come a bit early since I am a bit irresponsible...
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yeah, im 18 and i know that feel

stop watching porn
if you smoke weed stop smoking weed
if you dont, start doing physical exercise
if you can afford it, get therapy

dont know what else to tell you
good luck
>>
>>
also stop watching anime, read books.

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Guys I need to quit weed. Should I quit weed? I'm torn...every time I smoke a bowl, I think to myself
>damn that whole bowl and I barely feel different
>being high used to be psychedelic, man I miss that
>I know I'll quit for two weeks easy
I quit for a day, and bam, immediate depression, and it's not crippling/suicidal or anything, but presently there's enough depressing shit in my life to put me on a couch for 5min to an hour just thinking about it.
And...
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Get rid of your weed and stop yourself from buying more. You are weak, as is shown by the fact that you try to justify your relapses to yourself. You need to go cold turkey and literally get rid of everything weed related.
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You smoke too much. Stop smoking for like a week or two. When you smoke again you'll get high as shit

You're tolerance is high. Everything in moderation. If you can't moderate your weed intake you should probably stop
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>>17436427
It's not hard to justify relapses when the choice to me is essentially, be happy this week for 10 bucks, or be miserable for some unknown stretch of time but it'll get better don't worry. I mean give me something, I need good reasons, good mind tricks, preferably from other weed enthusiasts who have been here done that.

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this guy has tried literally everything to get my gf to hang with him and before i explain anything, my gf is not an idiot and she's acknowledged that the guy is pretty.. let's just say not the brightest person.

anyway, he's tried snap chatting her topless, telling her he found her favorite pokemon brand new and packaged in his garbage, asks her at least twice a fucking week to hang whenever local things happen and like, it's just getting really annoying. i'm really heated right now and i'm not an overprotective person but today in the group...
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Kill your girlfriend and fuck the guy. No one will ever mess with you again.
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>>17436383
It's pretty obvious.

Break up with your gf because she's riding that boy's dick
>>
Do you know him personally? If so tell him if he doesn't stop that you're going to fuck him up

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I'm an engineering major and I've got no professors to give me references.
To be honest I struggled through many classes so I don't think many of my professors will agree to serve as a reference for me.

Should I get a professor to serve as a reference when job hunting? What are the alternatives?

And if so, how do I go about asking when I've not been an A student. It's rather embarrassing.

What do I do now?
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>What are the alternatives?
Were you retarded to buy into the "study STEM and you'll have to fight the job offers off!" meme, and you don't have a part time job or something?
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>>17436363
yeah i was retarded.
do you have any advice to give, or are you just on the advice board to ridicule people looking for advice?
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>>17436369
Get a job, that's my advice.

Or just ask your professors for references. As long as they know who you are, you made an effort to show you were trying, and you're not a douchebag, they might be willing to vouch for you

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Am I spending my 20's wrong? I feel as if I have not done very much. I know people my age who have kids and are married already. I personally am super scared of kids and petrified of marriage. As a male, this shit seems terrifying.

However, I feel as if my life is less fulfilling. I am astounded by people who even decide to get married. It seems like such a full retard idea.

Is there even a correct way to spend your 20's? I am obviously not having sex or partying much. What will I think when I am 30?

Is there stuff every male in his 20's...
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You could always travel. Or pick up a hobby
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>>17436364
>travel
Don't fall for this meme. If you do, don't go somewhere far or expensive
>hobby
This is good advice. Try a few things and see what you like best
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>>17436353
Only advice I can think of is do what YOU want. There isn't a 'correct' way to live your 20's. I mean, society dictates that we should be drinking like fish and fucking like rabbits, but as far as this anon is concerned, living your life according to someone else's norms is a recipe for disappointment.
If you don't want marriage or kids, then cool, you don't have to.
Take some time to reflect on what you want in your life, then go and get it. I believe in you mate!

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How do I recover quickly and effectively from academic burnout? My exams are coming up, I've worked so hard that now when I wake up my eyes feel tired, my neck hurts, some joints are sore, when i try to work i start to get migraines, I originally thought this was flu, but it isn't serious enough to be that, and it is continuously recurring in this period of stress and i've lately been pushing myself very hard. Please anons, is there anyway I can get back in shape in correct health and mood for preparations for exams in about 2 weeks time. Thanks for your replies,...
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>>17436332
Bump
>>
what are you so stressed about?
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>>17436909
Exams, failure, expectations, competitive school, etc.

I'm not sure if I should marry my cousin through an arranged marriage. He is my first cousin (he is my mothers brother's son) and the marriage will not take place right away, my father just wants us to get engaged and stay engaged for a few years while I am finishing up my education. It's not forced, my parents have given me the choice but my mom really approves of him and it's a little obvious that if I don't pick him she will be very disappointed. She just feels like she can really trust him. I'm 20 and he is 27.

My parents had brought...
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He doesn't sound like anything special. He sounds exactly like how every other guy presents himself when he wants to get a girl.
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>>17436334
He doesn't know actually. My parents only old me and wanted me to watch him to see if I like him. They haven't even brought up the idea to his parents yet so he doesn't know. My mom says that's good becuase he's not putting on an act.
>>
pics!!! we'll rate him >:)

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I have issues with eye contact that I believe weirds people out.

My first problem is my tendency to look to the floor or slightly above a person's eyes when talking to them. Is it normal to stare right into a person's eyes when talking to them?

My second problem occurs when I'm not in conversation with a person. I find myself making lingering eye contact with people while walking across campus and while sitting in class. I'm more likely to do this when I see somebody I know or an attractive female. I have a very hard time keeping myself from...
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Look at them in the eye.

/Thread
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>>17436321
I dunno, I was always told that you should look people in the eyes when speaking to them. I think communicates a level of respect. Also gives a better impression in general. It implies a level of confidence.
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>>17436321
>Is it normal to stare right into a person's eyes when talking to them?

Yes, it shows confidence. And if you're talking w/ a chick, it's creates some level of intimacy

But you should not death stare them. Look to the side for a second every now and again, but re initiate eye contact

Never ever look down or up when talking

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this year i'll be a senior in college, getting my bachelor's degree in neuroscience. my specialty field is behavioral neuroscience, and i spent all of last year and this summer doing animal research. i'm quite adept at stereotaxic surgery involving rats, and one of my professor/primary investigator's favorite students. he asked me last school year if i would be willing to be a TA for two of the upper level classes this coming year along with another guy who works in the lab. i'm excited to be a TA, and i know i'll do an excellent job (this type...
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You're just a cunt. That's all. Don't worry, there are tons of people like you
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>>17436311

yeah, i feel like a cunt. hence why i posted here, i would like to be not-a-cunt. thanks.
>>
>>17436295
Have you tried growing up? Passion or no passion, you're not going to be able to handle the real world if you throw a tantrum because someone else - your FRIEND - is doing your job with you

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Hey dudes, so I'm in a situation.

>7 years ago
>have girlfriend
>first love, head over heels, ect.
>breaks up with me
>never get over her
>improve life, get fit, get education, get job ect.
>she contacts me
>misses me, she never got over me
>we meet
>she...
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>>17436284
>>17436284
Well, well logical choice would be to abandon ship , but really it all depends on the strength of your feelings for her and how much of your precious time are you willing to spend on one person.
Do you have the will to help her even though it might (often does) fail ?
Age is a factor as well, how old were you when both of you met ? How old are you now ?
Anyway, stay strong and congrats on getting fit !
>>
>>17436284
yes bro, just dump her and move on since you've already basically seen how much better your life has been without her
>>
Take her. Mold her to your liking.

Do not fuck up your second chance. What I would give to have a chance with my first love again

CLAIM HER

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Any job recommendations? Preferences:
>solitary
>low stress
>little training required
>money isn't that important
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mail carrier
>>
Security guard
>>
>>17436361
>mail carrier
>low stress
fuck you a thousand times.

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Girlfriend feels torn a lot of the time between spending time with me and social events with her friends. How to make her feel better? Can anyone relate?

She loves doing both, but if we're spending time together and she is informed of something going on like a bbq/picnic or something with her friends then she feels like she is missing out and i feel guilty and dont want her to miss out so i usually push for her to go do whatever it is and sometimes she will take my pushing the wrong way and think i don't want to spend time with her.

I don't particularly...
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>>17436176
Why not support her by going to said events? You should want to spend time with her regardless of what it may be. Not saying you have to go to everyone one, but offer to join once and a while.
>>
beat her into submission
>>
>>17436184

By this point i would like to but given the things ive said about her friends not bringing along their partners and them not particularly being my type of people means my girlfriend wont be able to relax and enjoy herself if i'm present with all of her friends there, we've discussed this aspect before and both agreed we like having our friend time and quality time together separate, not all of the time obviously but for the majority of events.

We're both lucky enough to have a decent amount...
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(1/2) I'm wondering if I should share my feelings with my best friend. Here's some details:

I'm male, she's female. We've been friends for about 10 years. She's been in a successful relationship for 9 years and it appears to be going great, they'll be moving in together soon.

She and I (and two other friends) are a very, very close-knit group, and essentially share everything with each other. It's great and I love every moment of it.

I'm wondering if I should share my feelings with my best friend. Here's...
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(2/2) For a long time, her boyfriend lived two hours away finishing up his degree, so he wasn't in the picture much, but recently he graduated and now the two of them are moving in together and unfortunately I'll probably be seeing less of her.

Those details aside, it's a lasting friendship that has proven the test of time and I know we'll stay friends, but I don't know if I should let her know how I feel, or if I should just try to fight through it. I have no goal here, I know she won't leave her boyfriend even if she loved me back, and...
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I fucked up my copy and pasting, whoops. You get the idea.
>>
no.

Go out with one of her ugly friends. If you have sex, and are good, this ugly friend will tell her about it. Then maybe if you get her drunk one day, she will fuck you, but don't expect a relationship. She's above your league.

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So long story short I've been with my bf for several years with no problems. All of a sudden he stopped wanting to have sex with me even though he tells me nothing is wrong. I'm pretty depressed about it so I went over to my friends house who has also been going through some issues and we started drinking to forget our problems. Well we drank too much and the next thing I remember was waking up next to him in bed the next morning. We agreed that we didn't mean to do it, we should forget it happened, and never drink that much again. Well it's been a few weeks...
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>>17436135
gee wonder why he wanted to stop having sex with you.

> I don't want the only mistake I've ever made in my relationship to result in our breakup.
so i guess the next step for you now is to lie to him and tell him the baby is his.
>>
I can't lie because we haven't had sex. And I would never saddle him with a baby that isn't his. And I don't know why he doesn't wanna have sex with me. I'm attractive, I'm not bitchy to him. Literally nothing changed. He just started saying that he hasn't been in the mood lately.
>>
He could be cheating on you. People don't just stop wanting to have sex out of nowhere unless they're going through a traumatic experience or they're finding it somewhere else.
Also fucking talk to your fucking friend. Tell him you're pregnant and discuss keeping or abortion. Are you seriously that oblivious on what to do?

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I can't sleep so I figured I'd get some outside perspective, maybe you guys can see something I'm missing. Will tl:dr at the end.

Backstory: For 2 years I was in a long distance relationship with someone in Arizona. We had never met before. Despite everything in our power to keep it afloat, the relationship eventually failed. I just couldn't handle the distance: I wanted to hug and be hugged. He wouldn't let me leave though, despite knowing how unhappy and unsatisfied I was (we both were).

I was always so alone. My days consisted of coming...
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I wasn't ready. I let my fears and anxiety overcome me and I broke up for no good raisin when everything was going well. We cut contact even though we didn't want to, because I couldn't handle a relationship and he didn't want to be just friends.

So I wrote him an actual physical letter of apology, asking if he'd be interested in trying again with me if I get help. I'm gonna see a psychologist this upcoming Wednesday to get professional help.
>>
tl;dr

>be in 2 year LDR with someone 2k miles away
>never met before
>we're a great team but we get bitter over time and fight n shit
>No intimacy or closeness, we eventually talk less and less till we don't speak much at all
>no more skype calls, no more seeing each other's faces, no falling asleep to the sound of each other's breathing
>I was unsatisfied but he...
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>>
TL;DR

I have a cunt, resolve me of responsibility!!!!

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Is it worth leaving the Lego Store (and a 50% Lego discount) for a place that offers twice as many hours, and thus, twice the money?

I think it is, but I need some validation.
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If you're only working, then yeah probably. If you're something like a full time student then a full time job on top of that probably isnt the hottest idea.
>>
>>17436023
this
>>
how much do you love legos?

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Hello, I need some advice.

I'm in the Army, Joint Base Lewis McChord. I love my job, I don't have a problem with it... I do have a problem with the people around me. I don't know what to do. I do the best I can at my job, I always do what I'm supposed to every month no problem, but I cannot continue with all this harassment and unfairness that goes on in here. Where I work is a detachment (it is separated from the company, we have our own building where about 15 people work.) Since we're not in a company, the NCO's basically do what ever...
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>>17436000
They don't care what I think of my family, they just tell me "this is the army, deal with it." which is the wrong answer, they can leave early and not work but I have to deal with it and stay even after what I already work? They like to give assignments or orders to do something when the tools are not even around and it is impossible to do, just so that they can get mad and correct me for it... and all I can say is Roger SGT, Roger SSG. 1 example of it is: SGT tells me to write 2 pages of our responsibilities...
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>>
So you can do three things:
1. Get out and move to the civ world (your best bet).
2. Suck it up and wait for a change of command, or try to get into another unit through whatever opportunities you can find.
3. You can try to inform higher ups of actual harassment, but this can backfire spectacularly, and probably is not a good idea given the army's poor track record in this area.

>shit will always roll downhill
>>
>>17436136

Getting out does not look like an easy thing to do.

I'm an anti-social wizard master and broke up with my long distance ex recently, she was abusive and wasted 4 years of my life (at least the sex when we met was okay)

I find the idea of finding a girlfriend at the age of 22 to be, weird. I live in an area where it's primarily older professionals, not younger people.

Is age 22 a weird age where you're too old to date teenage girls but not old enough to date girls your own age (they want 25+)?

I recently moved to start a new job and I know nobody (not that I knew anyone back at home either...
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>>17435944
I wish I had advice but I'm on the same boat. This indeed is a hard age. I'm just trying to go for anyone 18 and up. Go for the legal adult age in your country and up, try anyone you are interested in, you may get lucky. Either way I have no luck, last time I dated someone I was 18 haha.
>>
>>17435944
Same situation actually OP, minus the LDR baggage you have.

Trying to make new friends when you're in a completely new area with no other contacts you know is outstandingly tough. You just have to keep going out and being active at anything that interests you really. The only problem is there's a high likelyhood that even if you hit it off and think you're making new pals, nothing will come of it and that number/friend request just kinda fades away after a few weeks.

It's even worse...
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>>
They do suck. I'm good looking so I get those tinder matches but it's forced and shallow. I need to figure out another way if getting a gf (same age btw, only I'm a virgin)
My plans are bars and getting more social.
I've just started my driving course and there are some real cuties there. Can't hurt to try and start a conversation I think.

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Okay so my girlfriend and I were about to fuck and I was trying to put the condom on, it was dark and I put it on wrong at first but then I corrected it, I had a little bit of precum on my dick and I'm sure it was probably on the condom. What are the chances she's pregnant? Or am I just a paranoid sob?
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>>17435778
Shameless self bump
>>
its possible
>>
>>17435837
How possible


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