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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 672. page
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Those of you who live in US, particularly western (CA) HOW THE FUCK DO YOU GET AWAY FROM THE HEAT?!!?! I live in Fresno, CA. While it's dry here (thank for for that at least) the heat is unbearable, staggering right now at over 105 FUCKING DEGREES. FUCK. What sucks is that it barely rains, too. I want to go somewhere where there's rain, but not have to spend over $200 fucking dollars.
Any ideas? The heat makes me lethargic and angry. It brings out the worst in me.
I was just thinking of taking a trip to the bay, but it's expensive to stay there so unless...
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>>17399507

nowhere really, there are no 200 dollar vacations even at hostels.

just invest in AC. mine was 275 bucks, and its a 'floor unit' that i just stick the tube out my window and its all good. not sure how much its gonna fuck up my bill but my room is small enough taht i dont need to run it all the time.
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>>17399507
buy an AC like everyone else does. Yeah its expensive, but its that or live at the mall like all the other pisspants.
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>>17399513
Thank you for responding, anon.
I live in a big house with my family, though my room isn't that big. My dad said an AC takes up a looot of electricity so I'm skeptical. Where did you buy yours from? I'm on a budget because I'm trying to move to San Diego soon, too.

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I've come to the realization that my BF is bi (likes traps,futa, would joke about strap ons)
i'm willing to try anything with him but i'm very submissive and have no idea on what to do
we also have a huge height difference

>tl;dr how do I peg bf
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>>17399500
Start small fit domination. Sit on his face. Slap him. You'll get more comfortable with this as you do it more.
For pegging, there are probably beginner guides you can look up. You aren't the first short woman to pound a taller man in the butt
And congrats for being an awesome girlfriend!
>>
Start out really small... make his least favorite food and make enough so that the next day so you can say "leftovers for dinners XD"

THAT is femdom. All this strap-ons and sex (ew) is misguided. He's put so much time, love, and money into making you happy and he dosen't even get a good meal in return.

Fuck yeah. That's hot
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>>17399654
No. Just kick him in the balls and fart in his face like a normal girl. None of this weird, perverted 'coooking him a bad dinner' crap

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I got drunk when i shouldn't have, i became confident as fuck and i got this hot girl's number.

Too bad i'm normally an antisocial retard

I'm new to this whole texting thing, tell me /adv/, how do i do this? how do i even begin?
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1.Get drunk again.
2.Keep texting
3.???
4.Become alcoholic
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>>17399475
"hey i was wondering if you wanted to hook up for some coffee. we met the other night."

I find it interesting that alcohol make normal people act dumb, but make sperglords act normal.
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>>17399475
Text a bit and get more girls numbers

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How can I get my old Youtube account taken down? I forgot the password/email and now it's just there.
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>>17399458
google youtube help center.
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>>17399476
I tried. I got no help.
>>
Is there any way someone can
Flag the videos to the point that it gets deleted?

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is it a trend that old women and minorities talk shit about other coworkers? how can i avoid these kinds of people for my next cuck job?
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>>17399448
Everyone talks shit about everyone at a workplace whether you hear it or not.

Welcome to the human race.
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>>17399460
it is impossible that other jobs have people who complain other people doing nothing all day and ask about their time sheets. my job is literal shit and i work in my community college.
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>>17399465
>i work in my community college

wait till you hit the real workforce bro.

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Hey guys, I'm going to college (first year) on the other side of the states. I don't know anyone where I'm going and I'm not really that close to anyone, including family. I'm really nervous and my anxiety is coming back. Is there anything I can do to feel more comfortable about diving into something completely new by myself? Yes I have used google, but I'm interested if anything as worked for you personally.
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>>17399442
A fuck ton f people are going to feel just like you.

Socialize as much as you can regardless of how scared you get.
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>>17399449
thanks, Ill try my best!

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how do some fat women have big butts because some of them are supposed to be flat
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>>17399419
high heels, stairs, body type, exercise and/or genetics.
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>>17399425
high heels and stairs dont make your butt bigger otherwise my butt is dyslexic cause i take the stairs everyday
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Because where your body puts fat is a matter of genetics. Women as a whole tend to have more fat around the hips and butt, men as a whole tend to have more fat around the stomach, but this is not universal. It's also genetic whether more fat is subcutaneous (under the skin) or visceral (around the organs).

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Me and my best friend have just finished our degrees and are thinking to start renting a place together. Do you think it would ruin a friendship, living together? We get on really well and have done since we were 16. I'm just concerned that we'll break our friendship and the dream bubble of two dudes finally away from parents, livin' the dream, will burst horrible in my face.
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>>17399402
depends entirely on the people moving in together.

Insert every tv show episode of 2 friends moving in together and finding it tough.
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>>17399402

it depends on the people like the other anon said. being friends and being roommates are two very different things. but sometimes you happen to align the qualities.

its easier to be friends with a roommate then it is to be roommates with a friend to be honest.

i had a friend, we got along great, but moving in together ruined that. namely because I enjoy and appreciate my alone time, and he'd get mad if i say, watched family guy, without him.

getting on really well doesnt tell you if...
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Think about a few things. Looking back at being at his house, does he keep his room he same way you do? Where are his clothes.. put away or on the floor? What are his eating habits? Has he been away from mommy long enough to know how to live on his own?

Compare the answers to you and see if there's some compatibility. If you're someone who likes a fairly nice place and his room is always a mess, or if he likes to dump his jacket and shoes on the floor at the front door, it ain't going to work.

Having said that you could try and put a one-year limit...
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Can I pass my driving test if I only have a week to prepare?

I've only driven a handful of times, but I plan to drive at least once a day until my exam
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>>17399401
Yes.
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>>17399401
yes, driving is about how much force you put on the accelerator not your steering wheel.
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>>17399410
No.

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Hey /adv/,
I am moving to a new place soon and I will have to get a new job. I am going because of college, so I am working part time. The problem is that my right leg and back are super fucked from an accident that I had a few years back, and I can't stand on it or walk a whole lot at all. I was able to live here because I had an easy desk job as an office clerk, but now I don't think there are any in the area I am moving to. Some have suggested I get some aide like disability until I finish college, but I dunno, I never really liked the idea of mooching or getting...
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>>17399391
Call centers
Cashier
driving jobs.
Security desk jobs
data entry
customer service

lots of options. too lazy to list them all.
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>>17399400
The problem is that I can't seem to find any of the like in the area I am going to. Cashiers excluded, but they make you stand all day, and I can't do that.
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>>17399406
then disability or look harded

>but i don't wanna/can't find anything.

Then your either lying and just lazy or you need to nut up take disability or end up on the street.

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I just discovered that my wife has narcissistic personality disorder. My therapist recommends an intervention where I kick her out of the house until she gets treated and cleared by a psychologist. Seems kind of extreme but I'm not the professional and I realize I might be the frog in the slowly warming water. We have 4 kids aged 9-19. What should I do?
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Idk If kicking her out of the house is a good idea, but is she like against the idea of getting treated?
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If she has legitimately diagnosed NPD, leave her and don't take her back. This disorder is incurable and will fuck you and your kids up. These people are incapable of love.
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>>17399392
No. NPDs are VERY difficult to get into treatment and some say they can't be treated. If they could admit they had NPD then they wouldn't have it.

im a bi guy and i want to start having casual sex but im too afraid of risking hiv.
people are not honest and lie about their status, oral sex is not safe
you can still contract it with a condom, and prep is not available where i am
im afraid ill be a permavirgin, cause girls seem pointless
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And? What are you needing advice on.
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>>17399369

too bad. condoms provide 98% protection so thats the best you can do. there is no magical third option. good luck
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>>17399369
Pretty much the normal role of the dice for a random lay, except the odds are a little bit less in your favor by being Bi.

Either role the dice, get laid and get tested. Or expand your social network to find a relationship.

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This shit happens to all my goddammed shoes. The tongues always slide to the side. How do I stop this annoying shit from happening?
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Make sure that it's tied tighlt around there so they won't move.
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Nice shoes, where did you get them?
And to answer your question: you should move it to center and then tie the strings really hard. I dont have this problem though
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>>17399366
replace laces and continue the cross patter all the way to the top.

While driving, I turned into a parking lot and slowed down for a dip in the road. While doing so, some guy was following behind me and honked because I guess he thought I was going too slow. This pissed me off, because I thought I had good reason to slow down, my front bumper would have easily hit the road if I went over a few mph. He shouldn't have been surprised by what I did unless he never went through the dip or was hardly paying attention. Makes me angry that someone would use their horn so easily. Should I let this bother me?
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>Should I let this bother me?

no.

For all you know his mom died and he was in a shitty mood.
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>>17399370
k thx.
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>>17399353
It's annoying, but nah man just let it go. Not worth your energy. People are assclowns on the road sometimes.

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how the fuck does a complete social retard learn to flirt
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>>17399350
trial and error

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Hey /adv/,
I am a very introverted and socially awkward guy and it's killing me internally. I have tried socializing (by simply trying to talk more to people), and I made a small progress, but I am still socially retarded. When I'm in a social situation, that kinda makes me nervous, I just end up staring at a wall rather than participating. This inability to really socialize with others cuts me off from the social life of my classmates, which just makes me feel like shit because it makes me fear that I will end up completely alone and die that way. I feel like I...
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>I have tried socializing (by simply trying to talk more to people), and I made a small progress,

keep doing this.

There is no shortcut. You get better at talking by talking.

>Can anyone give me tips on how to become more extroverted?
you can't as far as i know. You just need to throw yourself into social situations and learn as you go.

>How to not fear talking to people and approaching them?
Practice.I try looking down at people but that does not...
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>>17399342
what helped me the most when overcoming my anxiety was realizing that no one gives a shit if you stare at a wall for a while. people will make remarks if you zone out while doing that and can't keep up with a conversation. but if you're just the type to look at walls during a conversation then that's actually not half as much a big deal as you think it is. yes people will realize you're probably a little shy. but at the same time people will also realize that you're putting yourself into...
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>>17399342

ir pretty handsome so just go talk to people.

the only way to get over fear is to face em. practice makes perfect. have a friend there to help guide. let him know your concerns and issues and let him help you

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Give me your best pick up lines or conversation starters.

What works, what doesn't?
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>>17399332
>Hi, my name is XXXX, what's yours?

Tried and true... don't be a douche.
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>>17399332

context is key. but ultimately what you have to consider is
>does this person WANT to talk to me?

if they dont, very few pick up lines will work. you could go up to a girl, offer to take her to the fanciest restaurant in town, and she will still say 'no' if shes just not into you.

as for context, it all boils dow nto... well, context.

if for instance you are at a gathering hosted by someone you know. it is easy to say
>hey...
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How do I stop being combative in arguments? I was raised on the internet so debating has become a part of how I act. There are few people on 4chan who aren't warriors for their opinion, will do anything to win an argument. This doesn't matter, I don't want to belittle someone or be stubborn and insensitive just to prove a point, I am always wrong when I do this because I'm being a prick to people just to assert my opinion - but I do it often.
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>>17399318
>I'm being a prick to people just to assert my opinion

stop that.

Your opinion is not golden. Stop giving you opinion all the time. Nobody cares. Not even trying to be a dick here man. Nobody want to talk with someone who inserts them self into everything.

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How to tell her that she take too long to answer my messages? We can't make conversation with a answer every 20 hours
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You don't. She's not into you.
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You talk and converse like a man. Don't text and message like a pussy.
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>>17399307
Alright thanks

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I've been waking up with a very weird feeling in all of my limbs for the past 4 months. You know how when you're scared, your limbs kinda get shaky and you're clumsy? I have that 24/7 but it's at its worst when I wake up.

I also have negative afterimages and tinnitus which developed right when the tense feels began. I had panic attacks for a good month thinking it was MS. When this was proven to not be the case, the panic attacks went away. What is this thing?!

I've been to all kinds of doctors - GP, cardiologist, endocrinologist, neurologist...
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man, if a bunch of docs looked you over and they don't know, then we won't either. so I hope you don't mind vague guesses.

what's your anxiety level like these days? how much sleep are you getting? are you eating enough?
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>>17399317

Docs are pretty clueless also. I insisted on the vit. D for example, because I've read hundreds of comments by people who have nearly become cripples because of low vit. D. Got tested and sure enough, my levels were 5x below the norm.

Anxiety level is really low. I work a very comfy job, get between 7-9 hours of sleep every night and I eat well too.
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>>17399304
Probably mild muscle atrophy.

exercise more. Whatever muscles feel jittery work them out hard during the day. If they get sore really quick then its likely muscle atrophy. Not a big deal you just need to stretch and work them a bit. Also work on the vitamin D.

I'll go to Berlin the 3th of August and i'll stay 5 days, this is my first trip ever to a foreign country. I'll go with a very close friend of mine (so i feel reassured a bit) and a friend of his i don't even know (and this already makes me a bit anxious).
I'm 22 and always had anxiety, but thanks to therapy i fixed 90% of my life and had lots of success, both socially and personally speaking. I did like the idea of traveling a LOT, but alas, my irrational fears made me deprive myself of many things i liked, but were too scared to try. However, only...
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bumper
>>
Bumping again
>>
Do as much as you can to prep beforehand, and then distract yourself as much as you can. If you feel anxiety coming, do controlled breathing. Five beat inhale, hold for two beats, seven beat exhale. Slow, with the exhale always longer than the inhale. When you feel yourself calming down, move on to something else.

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I posted this some weeks ago and got somewhat moderate advice though now I feel like I'm even worse and still ruining every form of friendship or acquiantance-ship i have.

"Why do I always feel like awkward and uncomfortable when hanging around with female acquaintances who have boyfriends?

I've hung out with some acquaintances at times, not finding out that they have boyfriends until later on and even the ones I just talk to and not hang out with, I feel really uncomfortable and shitty around them and I hate this feeling. I have nothing against them, but I just get this really bad and unshakeable feeling. "

My other bigger problem is that I'm shit with words. I feel like I'm a terrible person who always have to bring the negatives out with this pessimistic mindset of mine especially when it comes to female friends.

I have a friend/acquaintance, I hung out with her a while back when she visited my city and upon our first meeting she informs me she had a boyfriend which then made me uncomfortable in relevance to my OP. But even though I should be a good friend, I couldn't help but say at times that "wouldn't you be better off/more comfortable visiting [place where we are or were going to] with your boyfriend in stead of me?" which then ruins the mood. I had said this numerous times stupidly even saying at different points when we visiting another city that "I'm not comfortable with x" or "Don't only couples do x, I'd rather you not do that with" I should be having fun with a friend by my stupid idiotic self just chooses to ruin everything always.

Another case where I hung out with another female acquaitance who also has a boyfriend, hanging with her and her firneds. I felt alone and out of place. I being negative and just acting like I don't belong. Instead of being more confident and trying to have fun, I somehow always get pulled in by the negativeness and be a fucking moron.

I really need help, I can't ask anyone I know. Please help me /adv/ how do i change.
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>>17399290

To add to this. I'm basically a forever alone and I've never had a gf which i feel strongly ties in with this. But I do believe in friendships between opposite genders can work but my poison mindset is pushing these people away from me. I feel like they all just hate me secretly.

I don't even love myself either.
>>
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bump

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Looking for desks you can use while sitting and standing?

My ass hurst from sitting so long and standing is better for you anyways

I'm 6 foot if that is important.
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>>17399281

let me google that for you.
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>>17399281
Ikea sells desks with adjustable legs.

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My parents are threatening to disown me until I "grow up".

I've always been the black sheep. They're hyper-competitive, I'm not. They enjoy hunting, I don't. Work's their life and I've been on an extended vacation since '08. You get the idea.

So the short and tall of it is that I dropped out and entered the work force as soon as I possibly could. I saved every penny, moved out on my eighteenth and bought some land and what would nowadays be called a tiny house.

Ever since then I've devoted most of my life...
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From the way you've put it it sounds like you're better off without them.
>>
>I've been on an extended vacation since '08
>>
A family who disowns you for being happy and yourself is not happy. Close friends would probably be family to you at this point.
In other words, having the same blood doesn't mean they are family.

Does life have meaning?
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>>17399251
yes
>>
Does it matter?
>>
>>17399251

ultimately, whether or not life has meaning is irrelevant. people who believe life has meaning can chase that idea to the end of time and not notice. others can never question if it has meaning but rather whether or not their life has a purpose, and its better than the alternative: death. others believe life has no meaning and take that as an excuse simply to do whatever they want. others interpret that as some sort of meaning.

the basic idea of existnetialism is that the universe itself is random, we...
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I can't interact with other people in even the most basic way. Even with people who I get along with initially I alienate down the road.

I always end up being ostracized in some way. I should start of by saying that growing up I was bullied and harassed by other people - even having random men on a plane turn around and stare at me and then proceed to take turns spitting on me - because I was visibly bugging out due to being afraid that people were staring at me which ironically causes people to stare.

As a defense mechanism I keep away from people to an autistic extent. I'll avoid that whenever humanely possible and keep my interactions down to a bare minimum. I'll never say anything that isn't scripted so they can never use anything against me or talk about me. I'll openly avoid them and retreat from their presence at the slightest opportunity to do so because I'm afraid of people doing that to me.

When people are friendly to me I either regard it as being condescension or as being evidence of some kind of underlying maliciousness, so I never reciprocate and I sometimes become visibly angry or hostile in my facial expression or body language.

Towards the end of my job I was being treated like a serial killer. I could hear people talking about me like I was some kind of monster.

>"Is anon here?"
>girl who at one point was friendly and social with me proceeds to come and check up on me
>working alone with some guy and a few other people come to work with him and it's clear that he's extremely uncomfortable around me and feels like I'm some kind of dangerous

>few weeks later I'm working with him, his sister and a friend of theirs
>they know I'm socially anxious and they start pelting me with insults like "cough" retard "cough"
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i cant imagine what on earth you are describing. peopel spitting on you on a plane? people calling you a retard at work?

are you sure you're not exaggerating a little bit? where do you live?
>>
I avoid people and keep a distance to an extreme degree because I'm afraid of getting those kinds of reactions, but I get them anyway and they become intense and hostile.

My psych said that I should go to group therapy for social anxiety because exposure therapy is the mechanism through which social anxiety is relieved, but the thing in my case is that exposure does not make things easier.

I become increasingly paranoid and distrustful with time. The people around me sense this cageyness and are freaked out. They might interpret me as being shady/shifty and...
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>>17399248
I live in New York (not NYC, a small city).

When I was 16 I went on a plane and I was bugging out because I didnt know where to place my eyes or what to do, and then one man turns around and looks over his seat at me with this look. He goes back down and then two guys look over me and just start spitting at my face.

I thought it was a dream for a long time, but it was real. I know it was real.

I went to a public library as a teenager and these girls there are having a conversation at a table while I'm studying. They stop talking after awhile and then start calling me names - making fun of my ears, or calling me other stuff.

Another time I went to the same library as a teenager and I went to one of the seats in the aisle and used the wifi. Two girls were talking in the other aisle and then one calls me a weirdo and her voice is filled contempt and hatred. Then I cock my head in her direction and she says "Oh, he hear me" and I can hear her voice seething with contempt . She doesn't care that I heard. I'm not even a human being to her.

I didnt go outside for months after incidents like that.

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How to handle a dad suffering from a midlife crisis. Found my dad listening to David Gueta, Skrillex and even some Babymetal. At least he hasn't bought a sport car yet so i guess this situation will hit the shit to the fan. So what can i do?
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>>17399222

what? nothing? hes doing nothing wrong just let him do what he wants, god damn, why do you think he has to subscribe to some specific set of dad law?

my mother recently got in to self defense and survivalism. my dad recently got into pixar / dream works type 3d animated movies. people are allowed to have tastes outside the norm, and our generation of everyone playing pokemon GO has more or less proved that.

unless they do something actually destructive, let them explore. what are you going to do

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ITT: awkward teenaged OP is embarrassed to realize he likes the same kind of music as his dad.
>>
>Babybommer listening to Pearl Jam=midlife crisis
>Generation X listening to M83=midlife crisis
>Millenial listening to new album from Taylor Swift's daughter=midlife crisis

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What do you do when someone you loved for multiple years (GF) breaks up with you suddenly for bullshit reasons? I cant get over her its so depressing but the relationship is done she doesn't care anymore.

I haven't been single for more than a few weeks ever since highschool.

Yesterday my exex from a while ago (first) hit me up and wants to "hang out" on saturday and im so tempted. She cheated on me. Im just looking to hang out and do whatever and am lonely.
bad idea?

i dont handle this stuff well
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>>17399202

what everyone else does: move on.

its not going to stop hurting anytime soon. but you can find other things to fill your life that make it a smaller pain. one that isnt as relevant because you have plenty to be happy about.

you're like the guy from 'i love you man'. go out and make some dude friends and spend a lot of time with them.
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>>17399202
she probably wants to bone. But, just keep her as a side bitch. Don't fall for her, just fuck her occasionally.
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In the same situation as you, I have no interest in anything at the moment, I feel so broken and alone
She said we weren't seeing each other enough, and when I recognize my mistakes and try to fix our problems she's done with me
I don't know where to go, I'm lost

I should start by declaring that I am not american, I am italian and according to the law here spouses can choose a separation of property regime where there is no community property at all and everything one creates or acquires, etc. during his/her marriage stays his/her property during the marriage and after divorce.

That said I'm currently staying in the US snd there's this girl interested in me. I like her, but american girls have a reputation of being stealing bitches who will take everything from you and leave you homeless, also demanding you pay for their...
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Just don't get married. It's a stupid trap meant for woman's security, and humans aren't even naturally monogamous, so you'll hate being married a couple of years in.
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>>17399173
Get a prenup or don't get married.
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>>17399182
>prenup
I thought those things were useless?

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Liberal "man" looking for home defense tips for invasions.?

I'm looking for the best sex lubericant for the home invaders to use on my wife and daughter while they get raped in front of me.

Should I provide condoms or set aside an appointment at an abortion clinic?

How much cash on hand should I have for the poor minorities after they're done raping my family?

Should I also have the deed to my house signed over to them as well? So that way I don't offend anyone?

Any other advice on what to do would be much appreciated....
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>>17399159
lol
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>>17399159
i lol'd
australia, is that you?
>>
File: Now seriously.jpg (20 KB, 480x360) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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Now seriously.

Whats the best lube out there? My wife and daughters vagina's depend on it.

Do you think about $500 would appease the poor minorities? Maybe that and some free pizza?

Go Hillary go!


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