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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 726. page
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I'm obsessed with my last therapist. Everywhere I go I check if she's nearby. I hear her voice. I keep having the thought that I should impress her. Should I?
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>>17385419
No. You have nothing to offer her
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>>17385419
Better give up. She will never see you as an equal in terms of doctor-patient relationship.
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>>17385443
What would it take?

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>Beautiful woman from other country in town
>we are all at my bisexual girlfriends apartment
>gf and I want a threesome
>Gf isn't doing any legwork for it
>I flirt, tell guest I'm attracted to her one night
>this isn't working how we expected

How do I get my shy girlfriend to do the legwork here? I keep feeding her lines to get the conversation where it needs to...
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>>17385415
First post pics of the women in question.
>>
Are you quite sure that your girlfriend is 100% on board with this? Could it be that she finds the idea very hot, but now that this flesh and blood intimidatingly beautiful woman is in front of her, she suddenly finds herself feeling more insecure or jealous than she expected?

Yes, it is more logical that she tests the waters. It is kind of a dick move to hit on a woman and then reveal that you just want her to be a third, and if the girl's any decent she will be put off by your overt flirting while you are in a relationship.

I'd sit your girlfriend...
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>>17385415
Unless you are a sociopathic monster, you should not be doing anything. This person is visiting from another country with no place else to go, and you start telling them you want sex? That's pressuring them into it because they think you might kick them out if not. Use your head man.

All my threesomes involved alcohol and a female initiating the whole process.

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So me and my boyfriend(my very first boyfriend) have been together for 2 months. We are both 19. Last night when we started to have sexual intercourse for the first time he asked me a question in wich i thought was very wierd. He asked me if i can give him a rim(pretty much licking his ass). I did not know what that was until he explained it to me. But instead of just licking it he wanted me to penetrate him with my tongue until he ejaculates. So i rejected what he asked me to do to him and instead we just continued to casual sex. Should i feel bad? Or should i give it to him?...
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Don't do anything you are not comfortable with.
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>Should i feel bad?
No. Especially if he's your first bf and this is your first time having sex it's pretty weird for him to ask.

You have a responsibility to your partner, including sexually, but don't do thins you don't feel comfortable doing. You have plenty of time in the future to explore
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>>17385385
I think the big problem with butt stuff (aside from easier transmission of STI's) is that there are a lot of bacteria in the intestinal tract (including large intestines) that can make you sick if you ingest them or get them where they don't belong. You can reduce the risk by him cleaning well beforehand (i.e. shower) and if you don't actually shove your tongue into his asshole but just lick around the outside instead.

I'm pretty much willing to do whatever sex stuff my partner asks for when I'm in a committed relationship except for things that are dangerous to either of us or that just make me deeply uncomfortable (I won't hit, cut, or choke).

I've had girlfriends in the past who liked butt sex or having a finger in her asshole, and that's fine though a lube and a way to wash up are pretty much required. There are dental dams made specifically for oral sex, so if you do decide to shove your tongue into his asshole, get some (use lube on the asshole side). He might also enjoy a finger in his ass while he's fucking you, and that may seem less gross to you. Make sure your hands are clean, that you don't have any cuts on your finger, and that your nails are smooth. Use lube. Don't be surprised if you run into shit -- this is the place where it comes from. Wash your hands after.

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Im being emotionally abused by family and friends. What do I do?
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could you give us a little info as to why?
also, what they're doing specifically
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>>17385343
It's probably because op told them about a sexual assault.
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>>17385340
stop being such a pussy

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Why are women such cunts?

Roughly 4 weeks ago a chick "accidentally" texted me a picture of her vagina. After I told her she had the wrong number, she freaked out, but I decided I'd try to converse with her because I'm a kissless virgin and what else did I have to lose. Turns out she goes to the same college as me, but is two years older. We kept talking, and one night about 2 weeks later she starts dirty talking and we end up sexting. This happens every few days up until this week. She had been talking about how much she was looking forward to meeting...
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>>17385306
She didn't want you in the end. Changed her mind.

Maybe, the problem is you.
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>>17385314
lol thanks man
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I'd guess she just wants to feel validated. Once she got your validation, she moved on.

I've been looking ad so much porn, that i hardly get aroused by real woman anymore. It's like serious brainwashing.

Is there a way to change this?
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>>17385273
sounds obvious but have you tried to stop watching porn?
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>>17385273
oh no, its retarded
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Stay away from porn degenerate

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So, I want some feedback on one of my trauma management techniques.

In this technique, I get myself into deep focus. I imagine two people. One feels the trauma. The other consoles it.

The second provides physical and rational reassurance on the matter, and seldom shows effective emotion. The former may feel and express emotion in response to the trauma.

I like to think of it as a 'means to cry without crying'; it is internalised comfort.

Is this faggot tier? Good? Bad? Is it absolving or feeding negativity? What do you think /adv/?
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Well, that's great if you're trying to never actually address the problem.

Are you impaired cognitively? How in the fuck is this supposed to make you better?
You're masturbating in front of a full-length mirror and watching the show.

Seriously, quit with the self-indulgent navel-gazing. Seek help and work towards solving the problem, not marinating in it.
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>>17385254
I can't just not feel these things. If I don't do a controlled burn it becomes heavily intrusive. Flashbacks, outbursts of anger and shit. I tried to get therapy but when their solution was 'lol ignore it' and 'pretend it didn't happen', I don't know how to work through these things.
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>>17385222
Is this helpful for you? Does it help you cope with whatever your trauma is and function?

Because that's what really matters. Fuck what other people of it.

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How do you stop being a pretentious, hypersensitive faggot?

My parents have always insisted I do my best and make them proud. They would always brag to our family about my results and activities, they made me apply for the best high school in town, and they were always glad when I won contests yearly.
They allowed me to go for psychology (instead of medicine) and I studied hard, only to receive the results today and see that I'm on the tax list (not the free, government paid spots).

They said they don't mind, but I know they're probably disappointed. I'm really embarrassed of my failure and I considered committing seppuku for bringing shame to family. I've been crying and drinking since yesterday. It's always been like this, whenever something doesn't go my way I overthink it, dramatize it and go full emo.
Tell me /adv/, what the hell do I do to stop being a piece of shit? I'm emotionally unstable and self harm whenever things go bad, I would've been dead a long time ago if I wasn't concerned about my parents.

Long story short, I'm pathetic and I don't know how to change that. Help pls, I'll draw you something in return.
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>>17385164
man the fuck up, beta faggot
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>>17385170
Gr8 advice
But OP it's sounds like your doing fine . Reality is you may have an Inferiority complex . Perhaps go see a therapist about that
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>>17385183
Fucking pussies and their thrapists.
Why are you so weak?

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How do you deal with your entire family treating you like a liar after being sexually assaulted?
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>>17385141
You don't. You set fire to their house(s) and have a martini
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>>17385141
Simple, they are clearly not supportive and as such find another avenue of support. Friends, school, social workers. In your mind let them go, as they have seemingly already done for you.
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They only started treating me like crap after I told them about it, it's victim-blaming.

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I lived with my grandmother for about two years after graduating college. I moved out a couple of months ago.

Recently, past two weeks or so, I've been hearing her voice, usually when trying to concentrate on something. The voice isn't compelling me to do anything, in fact, while I can make out individual words, the "messages" as a whole are always stuttering gibberish. It's extremely worrying and more than a little annoying.

Is there any way to banish this without serious medication, which I'm more than a little leery of?
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Well I have auditory hallucinations and im on medication now but I battled it without medication for a few years I checked myself into a mental ward twice and they medicated me but then I would stop taking the medications thinking it would go away. the times I checked in I was hearing multiple voices and it was driving me bonkers. I think john nash may either live with his hallucinations now knowing they aren't real or they went away . I also read somewhere that like 40% of peoples go away without medication but only time will tell.
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OP here again, 2 other points to add that may or may not be relevant:

1) stuttering gibberish is pretty in line with grand mom's regular speaking patterns, it often takes 2-3 passes to grasp her points.

2) one of the major irritances of living with grandmom was her inability to tell when I was working from home, and then interrupting me.

I think at least partially, in my amateur way, that this is my brain artificially recreating a former environment. Don't know if that happens though.
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>>17385160
I usually hear my ex girlfriends voice and a lot of the time its not discernible. I read somewhere that it has to do with synaptic pruning and the brain pruning the wrong synapses.

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I keep making really frustrating errors to do with common sense at my weekend retail job. It may be scanning gift vouchers incorrectly, sending the wrong item down from the warehouse, or all manner of similar mistakes that suggest a common sense deficiency. Today I had to grab my manager to bail me out after I scanned a guy's vouchers incorrectly - afterwards I overheard him discussing my blunder with another manager and how "it's only anon" who makes these kinds of mistakes.

It's so frustrating - it feels like I have locked-in syndrome or something,...
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how long have you been working this job?
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>>17385069
Maybe you just hate your job
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>>17385125
Since last September.

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I'm 27 and I have this galling thought that I've wasted most of my life.

Throughout my school days I just played video games and didn't socialize much. I went to college and got an MA in the field that has very little practical application - it was a cakewalk, and most of the time I played vidya and partied with people from my dorm. After graduation I found a dead-end office job that pays little more than the minimum wage where I live, and I just stayed in the loop: sleep -> work -> video games -> repeat. I have no experience, no practical skills,...
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Balance, nigger.
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>>17385056
Don't force yourself to keep up hobbies you don't want to do for the sake of improvement. Instead, do hobbies you like and you'll improve automatically.
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>>17385056
You may be dealing with a sense of existential dread. That void you describe is incredibly common and why people turn to things like religion.

I would say that it might be a passing feeling and you will feel better about it soon, but has it been going on for a while?

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My boyfriend wants me to go to a family party which is outdoors and it's 90°
I said yes a week ago
Due to my face breaking out and realizing it is outdoors I no longer want to go nor have the confidence to go.
I'll sit there sweating. My hair will curl and my face will melt off.
if I tell him I don't want to go he'll act like I'm rude and i don't care about him?
Should I tell him no or should I be a good girlfriend and just go?
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u made a decision, u have to deal with it. schould have thought about it before xD btw. who cares?!?!
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Go. You agreed before-hand. I'm sure they'll have some way to keep cool.
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Jesus christ you sound like a shit woman.. Oh no poor mee so defenseless you amature. Sun hat matching dress with plenty of spf and bug repellent. You sound like a self centered twat.

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>want to suck a dick
>no idea how to find a local one for NSA
How do you start being a cockslut, /adv/?

I want to try it once and if it's fun, make it a regular thing.
I don't want reciprocation, I just want to make them shoot in my mouth
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Literally just say I want to suck your dick and it's ggs.
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are you a dude?
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>>17385061
Yes. I prefer girls, but real relationships are a lot of work and I don't have one right now.

I need some serious advice. One of our family's friends is consistently flirting with me whenever we see each other and it's getting increasingly awkward.
I've explained to her I have no interest and asked her to stop but she continues to do it, and I honestly don't know what to do other than just avoid her, but even that's difficult because a lot of the same social events I go to she is at, and I don't want to just quit going anywhere for this.

What does one do about people like this?
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Tell her no in public if she makes a fool of herself flirting in public with you when you have made your feelings clear.

That or tell her she is a whore or desperate for attention but be expecting a kick in the nads.

I have to ask, is she like this with other guys? Are you sure to someone else this would be seen as flirting? Ask friends or family that is present and witness this flirting on their opinions of what is going on and get them involved to get you out of it. If you feel like you need to keep a record (if the flirt denies flirting) confront with witnesses...
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Act unattractive. Put her off. There must be something she finds revolting in men in general, so just try different things.

Complaining about girls your own age you like, and come across as pathetic and needy - but be aware of any awakening motherly tlc.

It would help if you provided us with your own and her age.
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>>17384999
Not to my knowledge. She seems relatively one track minded in that context.

>>17385006
She's 22 (maybe 23), I'm 20.

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8: My sister is watching movies
10: She's playing games
Midnight: Still playing games
2 in the morning: Listening to music
3: She falls asleep
4: Goes in the kitchen to drink a glass of water and back to bed
8 in the morning: I wake up and she's already dressed, cooked and had breakfast, meaning she got up one hour before.

She creeps me out because I can barely function without at least 9h of deep undisturbed sound sleep per night and she's getting by on 3 or 4h of catnaps per night.

Genuinely worried here... Female metabolism is like that?
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The important part of sleep is the REM cycle, which is the deepest part and most valuable part of sleep. A person will drift in and out of REM sleep throughout a typical 8 hour night, usually in 45 minute cycles. But people who don't get to sleep often drop into REM faster, allowing them to get enough rest to function.
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>>17384954
It has nothing to do with being female or male. Everyone is different. Some people just require more/less sleep.

I need a good 8-9h to feel completely refreshed but my husband only sleeps 4-6h and gets really restless if he stays in bed. My sister never goes over 6h either.
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>>17384954
I know a lot of people that are fine with anywhere between 5-7 hours and some that need st least 8. Durig summer I'll wake up after 6 hours and feel alright about it. It really just depends on the person.

But, 3-4 hours seems very little. I've never met anyone who's okay with that little sleep.

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>Be 22
>Have webcam/phone sex with a bunch of women on chatroulette and omegle.
>I can suck my own cock by god!
>I'm too busy with school/work to meet women so I just cam for my kicks. Even do phone sex. No complaints everyone acts like I'm Dolemite or The Fonz.
>I'm a virgin but on the phone/web I'm Ziggy Stardust levels slutty.
>Meet cutie from School

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>>17384938
>I can suck my own cock by god!
please describe
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>>17384941
Oh it's not big deal, I mean I'm in the 9 inch zone so I can get my tongue/lips around my own cock easily.
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>>17384941
It's not as great as you think anon, it makes your back a bit sore, especially if you climax.

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It's all over now /adv/. My dream of a happy marriage with the love of my life since college will come to an end.

My wife is already at an advanced stage of cancer. She's already unconscious and the doctors have already told us that she won't last this week. I still can't accept it /adv/. I mean it wasn't suppose to be like this. We were suppose to grow up old together and all that.

I feel that if the doctors are right, I will pretty much go to a downward spiral. I've lost other relatives in my life as well in the past and my wife...
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Hi OP

It's all over for me too now /adv/. My dream of a happy marriage with the love of my life since college will come to an end.

Bitch cheated on me with multiple guys just before the wedding, I discovered it by accident and cancelled it all just before.
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>>17384924
What advice are you looking for exactly?
Implying that what you say isn't copy-pasta or plain out lies, tough luck.
Life's a bitch ain't it.
https://youtu.be/0wgVW8E0wU8
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>>17384924
Land before time, great choice OP

I'm really sorry about your circumstances, and hesitated commenting since I have very little idea of how to make your situation better, but I hope you can push through it and not lose the willpower to give up.

Your daughter will be impacted, but this holds true for all children that grow up without a certain parental figure, and it is not your fault by any means. Focus on yourself for now and spend time with your wife while you still can, find some people in your...
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How often do you guys visit nolstalgic memories, whether it be in your head, or physically in real life?

I find myself thinking about it at night the older I get, and still will sometimes plug in my N64 to play Banjo Kazooie, Zelda, etc. Ive beaten the games to completion, but I still log in just to walk around and go to different stages to listen to the music or just enjoy the state of mind it gives me.

But at the same time I'm really depressed that I'll never have the experience again, and it really bums me out. Is reminiscing unhealthy?
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>>17384918
Constantly. I live in the past. All I listen to is 80's music. My hair and clothes are 70s style. I play 90's videogames. I'm only attracted to girls with vintage hairstyles.
I'm pretty sure it's not healthy.
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>>17384918
I only visit the past for nostalgia if I'm already in a happy mood. Otherwise like you said, it would cause depression if I try to relive it.
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>>17384918
Apologies in advance for the fuckin essay.

I have a weird relationship with nostalgia.

I'm under no illusions about the nature of time. I don't believe in the concept of "the good old days", and it pisses me off when people glorify the past as if their personal golden age wasn't rife with its own era-specific problems. Things get better and things get worse; the majority of people who do this tend to use their childhood or teenage years as a reference point, which are always...
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Hey /adv/
So considering i havent had any classes since the start of july, and I won't up until september, I have been doing anything else besides jerking off 3-5 times a day to porn and my ex girlfriend (which is a problem in itself) and playing video games.
Just recently my room got renovated and I haven't used my computer in a few days, and that hasn't really done much.
It made me realize I was masking my problems by abusing video games, but I'm still sitting around, sleeping, jerking off, watching videos and posting practically all day on my...
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What do you value in life?
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>>17384915
Find a gym and go lift. Improve yourself and everything else will fall in line; the cycle will be broken!
>>
go out
OH WOW YES ITS THAT FUCKING SIMPLE WHO WOULDVE GUESSED IT?????????

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Hello /adv/,I'm contemplating suicide since many months because of my weed addiction, please give me any advice regarding deaddiction,.Thanks! and I'm sorry if I'm shitting this board.
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How tf do you get addicted to weed?
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>>17384872
Because it becomes habit for a void. You will have to stop as the first 2 weeks will be hell. Plan distraction s that would fill that 2 weeks.
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>>17384874
I'm just wondering because sometimes I'll smoke weed everyday, sometimes I'll stop for months. I don't get how it could be addicting?

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I met thi nice conservative guy,and I am single at 23! I want to get married soon,and I think that this guy could be it.But he isn't a mormon! How could I convert him,date him and marry him in the spam of 3-6 months? I am getting old and want to have lots of children with this guy
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Suck his Dick everyday
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>>17384864
That is gross. Ugh. We are not even married!!!!!
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>>17384855
You think we are smart? Only Mormon guys use 4chan

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I need some advice lads (picture unrelated)

I already tried asking the literal faggots on /lgbt/ but they probably think i'm some sort of troll since i didn't get a single serious response. I'm in a bit of a predicament, and the gist of the matter is i don't know what i can do to help a friend of mine. And here's what happened, with a TL;DR at the bottom.

Biscum here, but please hear me out. Recently, i've started going to the gym after a long pause, and a lesbian friend of mine started tagging along with me to get back in shape since...
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let your dad fuck you up the ass
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>>17384813

Your advice is appreciated and has been noted :^)
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>>17384821
... You fingered a lesbian, going against her sexuality, allowing her to cheat on her partner, and possibly re enacting her molestation...

Shit op you fucked up bad.

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Do guys actually care if a girl is a roastie or not?
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>>17384727
Yes
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>>17384729
No
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>>17384732
Maybe

So me and my gf has been going out more then a year now. And we have a realy good relationship although its long distance....we had a fight and where i normally keep quiet and just say what needs to be said, i lost it this time and told her what i though...where im the one that always have to say sorry and feel bad after every fight and where im the only that tries and makes plans to see eachother and everytime i have a plan she shoots it down...she studies and works at the same time and some nights we rarely talk...which is understandable...but out of the blue she says we need...
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>>17384666
Long distance is hard. How often do you meet?

You have to learn to not be too clingy. It's not for everyone.

Right now I'm long distance cos my gf is a few hours away to take car of her mum. Lucky we are both well off so it's only an hour flight but it's still hard.
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>>17384694
It deppends on whats going on...we see eachother with a period of 2 to 3 months. I cn become cling but im working on it. Dont want her to get the feeling that im not worried about her or that im not there
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>>17384700
My gf and i have an agreement that as far as I can tell we are both happy with. We never go out without the other past 12 if tis not for a special occasion like a bday party or something. We let eachoher know where we are if we are partying, just as a safety thing.

Some people don't agree with this, but the fact is if you are at bars and clubs past 12 what are you doing if your not looking for a hook-up? Dancing? Neither of us are big dancers.

If it's just drinking or chilling at a friend's...
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y.jpg
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Hey adv, what is this animal?
16 replies and 1 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17384665
otter
>>
>>17384669
I thought its an otter too, but its not, look closer
>>
Muskrat I think.

Hello,

So my girlfriend and I (both 18) have recently started having doing sexual stuff (we've not been dating long) and one thing is really bothering me.

Whenever I try to pleasure her, through fingering etc she moans and loves it but never climaxes even when doing it for ages. However she's on B12 supplement injections and I've looked online and it's said to make females resistant to climax much more. I feel terrible because I can't get her off and it's frustrating as hell.

Should I mention it to her? I don't want...
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>>
Lube + patience + time
Have fun, be compassionate, don't stress
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>>17384672
I have mild, mild dyspraxia, so my coordination is pretty bad and i easily lose motion when I do it. I'm hopeless pretty much. I find it kind of insulting. I shouldn't be bitter I know, but I am.
>>
Alright listen up.

I've had this conversation with my SO a million times.

Some ladies just cant climax or its incredibly difficult to. There's nothing you can do about it. HOWEVER that doesn't mean that sex and sexual stuff isnt awesome. That doesn't mean that you aren't doing a good job.

I want to get a tattoo, but have it so it is useful. Getting a map as a tattoo seems useful if you get lost/ no phone. What would be useful tattoos? +Points if it is cool.
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>>17384628
>>
Sigils
>>
>>17384645
Fucking idiot

File: Morning-After-Pill.jpg (257 KB, 2048x1536) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
Morning-After-Pill.jpg
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Hello /adv/

2days ago i had unprotected sex with my girlfriend (didn't came inside her) today again but a few minutes after she took the Morning after pil. 24 myabe 25 hours after the first time happened.

Does anyone know if shecan still get pregnant or should we stop being worried?

thanks
7 replies and 3 images submitted. Click here to view.
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>>17384610
Justin?
>>
>>17384610
>>
>>17384626
No its Kevin!

Op: dont fuck if you dont know anything about biology. People linke you are ruining society with children you cant affort.

File: image.jpg (454 KB, 1175x1024) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
image.jpg
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I'm male 32 and looking to improve my tinder profile.

>Normal weight, could gain muscle, always been skinny (put on 10 kilos last 18 months, weigh the most I've ever weighed)
>Not tall, but tall enough that I don't feel it's a problem
>Rare racial mix, so I somewhat stand out
>Considered good looking by a lot of people, but probably only a 6-7/10 if you ask /soc
>Look younger than I am, as late as...
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>>17384608
My only thoughts here are that
1. You don't want to mislead a woman by an outdated picture.
2. If you're happiest with your body as it is now, it might be better to use your current self as a photo. It may be worth it to get photos taken again.
>>
>>17384608
Your 32 .. buy a new phone man ...
>>
>>17384616
Yeah, but as I said, I don't want to ask people to post pictures of me, as it's incredibly vain and most of my friends are intellectuals and more concerned with posting about politics, literature and arts.

'Hey master degree in religious studies anon, why don't you take a picture of me for the ladies, and post it online?'
'No, grow up.'


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