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Archived threads in /adv/ - Advice - 87. page
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My boyfriend accidentally read a message and then continued to read my messages, saw some stuff he didnt want to see. I was talking to my friend about how I had a dream that his brother fucked me. My boyfriend got butthurt and I told him that privacy was important, and that he shouldn't have gone through my messages. Now he's moping about and will barely talk to me. I know if I was in his situation I would be upset but then again I wouldn't be going through his messages while he was at work. His logic is that it was justified because it involved a family member...
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and? do you want us to tell you that you're right and he's wrong?

it depends on the content of the messages. if it was "lol had a dream his brother fucked me. it was so hot. i fingered myself when i woke up", then obviously that is going too far.

if it was like "lol had a dream his brother fucked me. it was gross and his dick was small. also he had 4 testicles l m a o" then that really isn't a big deal.
>>
He shouldn't have gone through your phone. If he wanted to fuck up his own day, that's his fault, not yours.

Let him pout for however long and move on. If you're really worried, just suck his dick or make him dinner or something
>>
I mean shit. As a male I'd be mad too. It's a red flag to me if a female is super serious about her privacy and doesn't let other people see her phone. He will fucking get over it. In the future just keep you dream to yourself or tell your friend in person so there is no evidence and no fight.

>24
>girl sold me bud when I was 18-19
>a couple years later randomly reply to her fb post asking for someone to go to a show with
>have a blast, start talking to her all the time
>haven't talked to her in like 1 1/2-2 years
>start talking to her last night when I'm blasted
>tell her that she changed my life, after her I stopped doing mad amounts...
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sounds like she's not interested in you in that way, so leave it alone. you can't force someone to like you.
>>
Anybody got a better idea
>>
bamp

how do u learn how to cook
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>>
You can learn figuratively anything on the internet.
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>>17793801
Start simple and learn the fundamentals--learn how to cook rice, learn how to fry an egg, learn how to cook pasta, learn how to cook meats and check for doneness, learn how to bake a potato, learn some knife skills, etc.

It's like a lot of other skills in that you have to build your way up a bit at a time. If you want to learn how to play guitar, your first move shouldn't be trying to learn a Robert Fripp solo, it should be learning your chords and scales. Same with cooking. Get the basics down and...
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>>>/ck/

spend a lot of time on /ck/

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I'm not betting on me being able to get a girlfriend before the year is out, but I can get hook up with random half drunk party girls

Is genital herpes just a mild annoyance that shows up every once in a blue moon, or is it constant and really bad?

I wanna just go raw with some random party girl, its basically statistically impossible to catch hiv/aids from straight sex as a guy, and all the other std's can be killed with antibiotics

Herpes is the odd one out
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>>17793794
It's cold sores in an unusual spot.

No, I mean literally. It's even the same virus; often a different strain, but sometimes not even that.
>>
>>17793794
>its basically statistically impossible to catch hiv/aids from straight sex as a guy

Go home Christianity you're drunk.
>>
>>17793814
google it

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Hey /adv/. I suffer from severe anxiety and my girlfriends grandpa got sick and needs someone to mow his lawn for him.

My girlfriend volunteered me.

Problem is, I've never used a lawn mower or a weed wacker in my life. Yeah yeah, I know it's silly.

How do I go about this without looking like a total retard? Does mowing a lawn require any know-how?
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Really simple but I'll go through it. It'll probably have a little handle that you keep pressed down to keep it going. Simply put it on the grass and push it to the other side, not too fast. Turn around (lift it off the ground don't just drag), go back etc.

If you don't cut it properly go back over it. Pretty hard to get wrong.

Don't try mowing stone paths.
>>
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>>17793685
Tell them you don't know what the fuck you're doing. Have some on teach you how to do it right. Do it with out fucking up. It's not that fucking hard.
>>
if it's got an engine, first thing you need to learn how to do is to start it. you need to yank on the starter cord as fast and hard and far as you can to get the engine going. the ones i use also usually have another lever that determine how fast the engine is going. mine had a little picture of a turtle >> rabbit. you want this mid-high when starting it.

some other random tips you might need if you know literally nothing:
there should be a lever somewhere to change how high the mower is. you don't usually want it on its lowest setting, maybe 2 or...
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Hey guys....so it's fucking weird...how i ended up here, on a goddamn website thats known for alot of things. Dosent matter now I guess...im here and so are all of you. I've had alot of thoughts recently...ive had this ex that I broke up with 3 months ago...but it was nasty as a break up. I'm sure there are some that feel me. But honestly I want revenge. I have it planned out in my head...i just dont have the people...fuck this shit. I hate her with a goddamn passion. Anyone wants to give their input on this? Or ask any quesitons?
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>>17793463
Newfag
>>
Im just asking for advice here, or at least a serious conversation.
>>
Just move on you autist.

the fuck you gotta make so much drama and shit.

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>Be racist
>Thanksgiving dinner with white family
>Sister brings over black boyfriend
>Mom, Dad and family is kinda cool with him
>Their watching football and drinking beers downstairs
>I'm upstairs in my room posting this right now
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>>17793462
Ask him if he plays basketball.
>>
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>>17793462
You know what to do...
>>
>>17793462
their watching football and drinking beers downstairs what?

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I fucked up a perfect relationship by texting other girls in testosterone frenzy

Now she is heartbroken and I am disgusted at my actions. How the fuck do I correct this?
I have come to the inner conclusion that she is all i want, and she wants to be with me really bad but neither of us know how to trust me.

How do i keep myself in check? Pic not related
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She is gone. You keep yourself in check by remembering this every fucking day.
>>
My now ex did almost the same thing, except it was via dating websites and not text. I dumped him when I found out. There is no going back. In the future, learn some fucking self control, and don't treat anyone else like that. That's all I told him, too.
The next time you have something worthwhile, don't take it for granted you man-child.
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>>17793370
>testosterone frenzy
Being a man has nothing to do with making you do these things. You got dumb, you got caught, it's most likely over for good, unless your gf forgives you.

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I become an asshole when drunk
How fix
Why does my gf put up with it
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My bf doesn't like me when I'm drunk so I just don't drink if I'm gonna be spending time with him. Simple.
>>
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Drink so much your drink personality becomes the standard. It makes people think you are a nice person when you're sober. Rather than an asshole when you're drunk.
It works on tour.
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>>17793297
It's a shame that there isn't a way to stop becoming drunk.

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I live In California. Her in Dublin for school. She is 4 years older than me and she fell in love with me. Im 19. She is obviously cute af and smart and funny and that. However a bit easily emotionally triggered. She constantly thinks I cheat on her or flirt with other people. Its not true /adv/ Im a fucking manlet in 6'3" height who doesnt flirt or cheat. She is beautiful. Great taste in music and film and art. But I fear she is tired of me. She thinks Ive losf interest. She jumps to these crazy conclusions after I say the slightest thing. Talking to her is like walking...
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> never touched
> relationship
M8
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>>17793061
We've fucked over the phone. she can e extremely sexy. But no dude I dont have 600 dollars to fly to dublin. Not yet. We have sent every part of eachother. Ive never done that. Shown every part of me. Even me showering. She loves me. All parts. Fat and not. Thats crazy to me. Ive never had a girl so infatuated with a body I hate.
>>
I mean, have you talked to her? Have you said that you would never do that?

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is becoming more serious a matter of love or a business decision?

i have been with my gf for two and a half years. i love her and we are serious and planning to be together for the long haul. she talks about kids often.

I am torn because I have true feelings for her however from a logical standpoint my gf is not an ideal partner. she's poor, she's unskilled, she's uneducated and has no plans to get a college degree, shes not good with money, she doesn't know how to cook, she's obese, she has mental issues and bad genes that make me think...
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>>17792427

On the pro side, she's loyal(the first girl I met that I have never doubted will cheat on me), she's honest and never hides anything, she's sweet, she loves me, she's always there to take care of me, she truly cares about my wellbeing and future, she truly feels I'm her soulmate, she shares and tried her best to build a life with me, she sees a future in us and truly believes in me.

She's got it on the emotional stuff...it's the stuff you check boxes on that she doesn't have
>>
the one on the middle is so thicc hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggg
>>
>>17792427

It sounds like you already know the answer yourself. If marriage and kids are important part of your future plans, it's time to look for a better partner.

GUIDELINES:
Before you post a question, check the FAQ to see if it's already been answered.
Keep questions short for more answers.
If you're not going to like honest answers, don't ask your question.
And please no derailing arguments.

FAQ:
>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
>Would you date a virgin?
><random insecurity>
Some...
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>>17792323
Girls, say your bf was more interested in a mmf threesome than a mff - what's your first thought? Closest case and time to break up with him or what?
>>
>>17792323
Ladies, are my standards for girls unrealistic ?
Me:
>6' white dude
>Thin but putting on some muscle
>Face is a 6/10 I guess, 7 on a good day
>Reasonably well-dressed
>Slept with three girls, had a 2-year relationship with one
>Never cheated on a gf
>have my shit together study-wise

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>>17792367
>Closest
closet*

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My life sucks with lots of problems but one thing that bothers me is it's as if I can't ever fuck a girl. I've had dudes tell me their stories with one girl and how they go to another and they don't always feel good about it but they've at least gotten somewhere with someone they've met in real life.

Multiple times Ill have a cute girl start talking to me knowing my charcter latch on to me whenever they see me but when I actually show interest or try to ask them to even hang out they'll text me some god damn bullshit excuse like "I'm...
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>>17791894
You're a creeper. That's what youre doing wrong.
>>
Be less aggressive and funnier

Girls can pick up desperation so fucking well it's insane and a major deal breaker
>>
>Iike today this cute irratating bitch I knew was following me and I kept feeling her up

>It's women's fault I can't get laid, I'm doing nothing wrong!

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Share your stories of when you've cheated yourself out of happiness.
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>>17784976
I gave up being really smart and promising to be shit at vidya and it was the biggest regret of my life
>>
Three months ago I broke up with the girl who was ready to give her life for me. I was ready to marry her, for us to have kids, the whole lot. I'm a medical student, she's in a successful business venture, it all looked great.

I broke up with her because I had feelings for a girl who can't sustain me like she can.

I regret breaking up with her everyday. She doesn't know I broke up with her for another girl, so I feel like I could reconcile her feelings for me, but I always feel so terrible about it I just don't think there's a way...
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I rejected like 3 or 4 really obvious advances from girls in college that were all gorgeous and intelligent. I graduated 3 years ago and since then I haven't even met a women close to my age who was also single and I'm still a kissless hugless virgin.

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I wanna be Adonis

I wanna fuck dudes' girlfriends and ex girlfriends and fiances and wives

I wanna beat the shit out of dudes

I will do whatever you seriously suggest
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Very vain, extremely hot, and exceedingly pompous. No-one will take seriously, will be called gay, and will be made fun of until he's twenty and becomes hot. Use with caution
>>
Then go to the gym, find a dealer to buy gear from, take boxing classes and get therapy/meds to put your self esteem into hyper drive. Look in the mirror every day and tell yourself you're way fucking cooler and tougher than everyone ever. You'll punch anyone who tells you otherwise.

Then continue to take gear. Think angry thoughts. The angrier the better.
Let your testosterone take the wheel. You're set brah.
>>
>>17794957

What kinda gear though?

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>Currently freshman in college, just turned 18 yesterday, & never had a gf.

Ive had "things" with girls but we never really connected. Im wondering if it's worth it to continue being outgoing or just focus on something else. I've been told my personality is loveable, but I'm average, maybe slightly above on a good day.
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I never had a girl friend in high school either. Once I was in college I finally snagged some. The fact alone that youre older is going to make you desirable. Just hit on 16 year olds that need a ride. BUT DONT get used.
>>
Sit beside girls that seem to spark your fancy during lectures. Introduce yourself, try to make yourself seem appealing. Try get them to like you enough to want to study with you, etc.

My first time with girls at college were with those I studied with.
>>
Getting girls is like fishing. Yes you need to cast your rod but dont go screaming at the fish.


I like to let girls approach me, its a confidence booster, and they wont do it unless they are interested. But some girls are interested and WILL NOT no matter what talk to you first, its just some stupid ass culture thing in their head, so you wait to talk to them but dont make it odd, like have a REASON. That's casting your rod, now you see how talkative back she is or isnt, see if she finds a reason to keep to conversation going or tries to talk to you again the...
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I posted a few days ago about this but I wanna learn how to box. I am buying a weighted punching bag for black friday and would like to know some good workouts to start training. It won't come in for about a week so I wanna start things at home first if possible.
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You probably wanna get your core ready for getting punched. Core workouts.
>>
>>17794661

There is only one thing that makes boxing god-tier, and that's slipping. If you don't spar, you don't box.
>>
>>17794671
Got any good core workout ideas? I have a pretty decent core right now but not good enough to take hits honestly.

So I have spent my life always wanting to be a martial artist and devote my life to training. I never followed through. I have also always wanted to be a master mediator and a pro ssb melee player. I also need to continue writing my book. I know these all take years to be a master at but I need to get started and commit myself. I need to get rid of distractions like the internet and devote myself to training all of these things. The thing is... I can't hang out with anyone and it will be a hard lonely life style. It will be tough and the road will be arduous, filled with...
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You have to be 18 to post here
>>
>>17794729
I'm 21 mate and on my way to becoming a firefighter. I know my goals and shit sound immature or something to you or other people but it is what I want to do in my life and I won't be happy if I don't do these things.
>>
>>17794656
bump

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>If you want to have a girlfriend, you must surrender your self respect, welcome being rejected and ridiculed , and see how small and insignificant you are because males are expendable by nature

>You have to get a car to transport yourself. That means if you must deal with a good chance of getting into a car accident , die or paying thousands because you're too broke for insurance, pay hundreds in total for auto-insurance, gas, car repair, loans, and accessories.

>You could...
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1. Any relationship that you are sacrificing your self respect for will not last, and being in one like that is a sign of desperation for affection. That's not how all relationships are. A relationship of mutual respect and trust is the ideal.

2.You can get a bike, walk or take the bus faggot. Cars are not that dangerous anyway. Probably more safe since you're in control + airbags and hunk of metal. Take extra lessons on "defensive/cooperative" driving if you're so scared.

3. Who's they? They can't jumpscare you if you know...
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your daily outlook is basically "other people have better lives and/or life could get worse, so why should i even try to do anything"

and the answer is you should try to improve yourself because reaching your potential will make you happier, not because you have to be better than your neighbor
>>
>>17794641
>What do you think about my daily outlook about life?
ok, let's give this a shot

>If you want to have a girlfriend, you must surrender your self respect
and I already stopped reading. you're an imbecile.

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To the married or divorced anons; have you ever been constantly lied to? what do you do if you cant trust your spouse anymore? what if you had kids? did you tough it out or push the thoughts in the back of your head? or would you get a divorce?
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Currently getting a divorce. Will finally be over in January.

He lied about seeing another woman and constantly lied about where all his money went. I would always have to end up covering all the bills since he would be constantly broke somehow. I wanted to be a wife, not his mother, and no one deserves to be fed constant lies.

He had two kids from his previous relationship, but we had none together. Kids or not, getting divorced is the best choice. At least try counciling first of you want to try and mend it.
>>
>>17794713
Im sorry for what you had to go through. Being lied to isnt easy, especially after marrying someone who you think should be loyal and trustworthy. I hope things get better for you soon.
Thank you for the advice. I feel so disappointed in him for lying over and over again. And in myself for allowing him to repeatedly disrespect me. I want to move on, but I know that's near impossible because we have a child together. I think I need to think more about giving marriage counseling a try.
>>
>>17794594
I too had this experience >>17794713
But I am a bloke and it was my ex wife lying to me.
Its fucked. Its really fucked.

But I'll give you what I learned from the entire process.
Don't bother with counseling, don't bother trying to fix it- you'll need all your energy to fix yourself. Divorce whether everyone admits it or not, breaks people inside, and you need all the energy you have to rebuild your life and who you are, don't...
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I'm socially inept, and know little of the world.

I need to get braces.

How do I proceed?
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Porbably get braces. My eyes are fucked due to years of contact use. Luckily glasses are sexy now, provided you dont get autism glasses.
>>
>>17794538
Try invisalign, AFAIK they cost about the same and they're clear
>>
What I mean is how do I start the process of getting braces.

Where do I go?

What do I do?

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Hello anons. I work at Macy's and am suppose to work tomorrow. I am normally working Receiving, but have now been put into Sales for tomorrow. I have only 5 hours of experience in Sales and am now having to work a 10 hour shift on the busiest day of the year. Should I call-in and use my sick days, or should I go (btw, I don't get paid more for working tomorrow).
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>>17794536
Id call in sick brah, say the turkey gave you the shits
>>
Calling in sick when they need you the most is not a good idea. Also it'll be good experience for you.
>>
Here's the options you have.
Call in sick when you're not and lose a sick day and also lose pay. Or go to work, gain a new experience, and gain money.

It's your choice.

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As a freshman in college, I've become severely depressed mainly due to loneliness.

Lately I've felt less depressed but nothing has changed in my life.
Not happy, just not sad.

My biggest fear in life is accepting unhappiness and that's what I believe is happening to me.

How can I try to snap out of this funk I'm in?
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>>17794473
>My biggest fear in life is accepting unhappiness
You have to accept it. Some people just have shitty lives. Take it from me, accepting it is liberating.

Accept it and adapt accordingly.
>>
>>17794509
I mean not having any hope for happiness
>>
>>17794473
was same position as you in 1st year, now 3rd year. Things are a bit better now.

Join clubs and make friends, go out and get drunk with them once in a while. Focus on your studies, thats what you're there for, enjoy things man

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hello /adv/

My boyfriend of 6 years is more on the conservative side, I'm a liberal. For years this hasn't been big deal for either of us. However, recently he's been spouting out opinions that go way beyond just being conservative opinion and go into "WTF" territory:

He believes

--If a woman gets pregnant she should be forced to give birth and raise the child as punishment for being a whore

--If a gay kid comes out to their parents and they send him to gay camp, he deserves it because he chose to come out

--that emotions are flaws and should be corrected

--Anything you feel is your fault (including emotional abuse)

--Men who get aids should not be allowed treatment because they knew the consequences when they had sex

--suppressing your feelings is a good thing and that "being yourself" is selfish

All of these views are under his thought of "everyone should be accountable for their actions." I agree with personal accountability but these just seem way off and frankly disturbing. Since I really do care about him I've been kind of ignoring these opinions since everything else in our relationship is okay. However, sometimes he'll bring them up and I'll get angry all over again.

These opinions have been coming out over the last few months and I just feel confused. I tell him that his opinions are so out of line with mine and extreme, but he gets defensive and says "I respect your opinions, why can't you respect mine?" He goes on to say that "they're just my opinions, they shouldn't matter. What matters is how I act. Opinions are pointless and shouldn't be taken seriously." And it's true...he treats me nice and we get along. In person, he's extremely kind to me and other people. I guess he's never acted on these opinions but I can't help but be confused/alarmed by his words. Is it wrong for me to be disgusted by his world view when his actions are the complete opposite?

Any outside opinion would be appreciated, thanks.
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Yeah, seems like a healthy guy
>>
>>17794467
haven't we already had this thread

no, it's not wrong for you to be disgusted by his world view. if he was a massive racist, but never acted on his hatred, he is still trash.

he probably believes what he believes, but is too much of a child to act on it. if he thought he could get away with it, i guarantee he would do it. he doesn't have the guts.

he's an idiot.
>>
>>17794516
I'll admit this is repost, I'm just feeling insecure with it all. He's in my head and I'm questioning if I have a right to be upset. Thanks for the feedback. I agree with you.

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I'm never going to trust people again. I'm never going to make connections. all I have to say is fuck you. I can never forgive people. I'm a fucking sociopath or something. I'll never be the same. I hate my life. I hate the world. nothing is ever going to get better for me.
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>>17794458

Read "The Stars, My Destination". It's corny as fuck, but it's the kind of corny you need.
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>>17794458


>I'm never going to trust people again. I'm never going to make connections. all I have to say is fuck you. I can never forgive people. I'm a fucking sociopath or something. I'll never be the same. I hate my life. I hate the world. nothing is ever going to get better for me.

And we're supposed to give a shit because........?
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>>17794465
because it's /adv/

I love my boy friend Steve, but he isn't my best friend (another guy Matt).

My boy friend isn't into the same things I'm into, but Matt is.

When I just want to chill, hangout, and make fun of the incorrect assumptions my boy friend makes, I hang out with Matt because he gets me. When I want to go out on a date and feel loved I hang out with Steve.

My parents told me they were best friends when they married each other. Is your boy friend suppose to be your best friend? Is your husband suppose to be a better friend than your other friends?

Maybe...
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OK plain and simple, you're a whore and you would love to be treated as something special when in fact you're not.
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Date Matt you dumb bitch whore
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>>17794425
Kill them both and dine in their entrails

Anoint the dark throne with the skulls of the damned

BLOOD

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

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This is going to sound really gross but whatever.

I haven't properly brushed my teeth or kept up with general hygiene for the last 4 years due to some shitty irl situations, depression, and general feelings of uselessness. I'm starting to pick up my life again and fall into a routine of productivity but I can't get back into brushing my teeth. Whenever I do there's an ungodly amount of bleeding. How do I fix this before it gets out of hand? Thanks.
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had a similar thing, when I finally mustered up the courage to fix things I spent about 3k on my teeth to get them healthy again. If that's not an incentive, being close to girls always helped for me. Whenever I knew I'd spend time with a girl I'd brush my teeth, so I just looked to meet with one almost every day...
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Oh, and the bleeding only goes away from getting used to the brushing. It's a sign that your dental-skin (no idea what it's called) is unhealthy.
Also, the feeling when you can eat ice again without hurting teeth is nice.
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Buy the softest toothbrush you can, and make sure to brush your gums. The bleeding won't stop until you fall into a regular pattern of brushing. Also get a sensitive tooth/gum toothpaste. Go to your dentist if you're too concerned

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I had a particularly affectionate one night stand, it was the most amazing feeling being cuddled for an entire night

I feel jealous of girls who get to be cuddled every night, whenever they want.

How do I forget the happiness I was given a glimpse of momentarily and be happy with what I have?
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>>17794400
Being cuddled at night is too hot and makes it impossible to fall asleep properly

I question the vertias of your episode milday
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>>17794400

I need an electromagnet to generate 9 joules linearly. Do the math.
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>>17794406
42

I beat you cuck

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Let's share some gift advice!

Of course, you only know the person you are giving a gift too, but others may have input about that gift you can't decide on.
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>>17794337

Leatherman multi-tools.
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>>17794369
For whom?

I really enjoy my leatherman and everyone I know enjoys their's too. It makes me feel so handy!
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>>17794374

Close male family and friends, considering the cost. I am guessing you are asking for girls - that's usually situational in my experience. Depends on what they like yada yada.

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I have an idea. I want to do some live advice sessions on Omegle for a while under the interest "advice". If anyone would like to partake in either giving or receiving advice (or both), please help keep this thread alive by posting anything really (maybe some pics for my feels folder?). There already seems to be a small community on Omegle that uses the interest "advice". Although, it would sometimes match me with a random stranger. That being said I hope keeping threads like this on /adv/ will help with that. I'll be checking periodically as long as...
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Oh and mention/ask if you're/they're from /adv/
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lemme get the ball rollin' with some of them feels pics
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