I actually posted about this in /r9k/ but figured I might get some actual advice other than 'you ungrateful faggot'... because I already know and realize I'm a fucking asshole and ungrateful. So. Here we go.
>tfw you have a smoking hot girlfriend and all you want is a cute chubby to love and call your own
Seriously. I don't even find her physically attractive. She has an incredible personality and is very smart, so I stick around (plus it gives me an ego boost that all my friends are jealous of me). I'd dump her but I don't want to go through the hassle of dating and all the chubby/fat girls I meet are raging sjw-cunts.
I seriously just jerk off to fattie porn all the time. She'll send me nudes or sexy photos and 9-times-out-of-10 I don't even do anything to them.
Seriously guys, help. Pic related, its one of her sexy pics.
I'm trying. The problem is I am sexually attracted to this, and not her body type. Tie it into the fact I naturally have a low sex drive so I barely feel any desire for her.
Yes I realize she's beautiful, I can see that, I just don't find her sexually arousing.
Oh, I'll also be dumping sexy/nudes since sh sends them to me and honestly they don't do much for me.
That won't work. Not only is her whole family naturally slim, she is very healthy and active.
More or less. I realize I have a really awesome girl. She and I just get along so effortlessly. Everything in the relationship is really good (and lets be real, I like having her around and the ego boost). I just don't want to fucking go out and date and put in all that effort when I already have a good thing going, you know?
You think I don't realize this? I feel bad, especially since lately she's been complaining that I don't make her feel desired and it really hurts her feelings because 'I get lots of male attention, but I don't want their attention, I want yours!' and yet here I am.
She's honestly probably going to leave me soon... and I also don't want that either.
Then you end this relationship. This is no different if the physique was reversed to traditional standards of someone currently dating a fatty but wanting a supermodel.
A relationship that has a good foundation is great, but will ultimately fail if there is no sexual attraction. This will end in heartbreak
>I get lots of male attention, but I don't want their attention, I want yours!
That is your last chance. She will act on it when she gets fed up. Appreciate what you have or be prepared for her to leave.
Hah, well, she lives in NYC. That is the problem, though, I don't want her to go. I really get upset at the idea of another man taking her. A few times we've argued over the lack of sex/feelings of desire (especially when I stupidly opened my mouth and told her most of the times her pics really don't do much for me, but sometimes they get me off. Yes it was stupid, yes I was drunk) and she asked how would I feel about an open relationship. I told her horribly, and she agreed, because she doesn't want that either. She hates the idea of going to someone else, especially when everything else in our lives just work out so effortlessly.
That's the thing, she's had plenty of opportunity. She travels a lot for work, and even tells me (when she's feeling spiteful for undesired) that men are paying attention to her. Yet, according to her, she won't do it because 'even though I could get away with it and you'd never know it just isn't right'.
Foolish to believe you can have your cake and eat it too.
Eventually it will fail if you don't put forth the effort.
Either you be true to your feelings, not be selfish and let her go.
Or you understand that nobody is perfect and love the imperfections just the same.
Choose your destiny
You're a fucking faggot OP, send her to California I'll take her
Odds are you'll end it, or she will because you don't like her like the faggot you are. And once you're alone you'll sit and miss her, you'll regret being such a faggot. Then you'll come on here and ask how to get her back, and I'll come and laugh at you
Wow OP it sounds like you're with a wonderful girl and you're willing to throw it away for what? Because you like fatasses? I ended a relationship because I felt like I wanted something else, turns out I couldn't have asked for better
You have 0 attraction towards her. Either you can change your perception, or you need to move on. Unless you think the former is feasible (I doubt it's so), staying in this relationship is just staving off the inevitable breakup.
I'm not going to fault you for being attracted to a different type of woman, but you're staying in this relationship just because you don't want to be alone as far as I can tell.
She's actually in California now. She works for a music label and is working Coachella with some artists her label represents. She loves California and really wants to move to Santa Barbara someday.
>you'll sit and miss her
Absofuckinglutely I will. Hence my biggest hesitation to let her go. I KNOW it will be a huge mistake.
I know no one is perfect, trust me, I do realize this. I just... I don't know. She's as close to ideal in everything I've ever wanted except she's not heavy (or exotic. I really love Hispanic, Middle Eastern or Indian girls).
Yes. Think of it this way: you love carrots, it is your favorite food, and yet all you have are peas. You like peas, they fill you up, taste great and you enjoy them, but you don't crave and look forward to eating peas as much as you do carrots.
I'm staying because I realize finding someone like her who gets me so effortlessly and who I honestly love and enjoy being around is very rare and it will be very hard to find someone like that again.
Don't be delusional. You're in this only for yourself. Remember that relationships are a two way street.
You are just leading her on at this point, fueled by your own selfishness.
I've already told you what to do. Whether you follow it or not is up to you, but the end result will still be the same
Nope. Her hair has never been longer than this. As far as I know she's never cheated on anyone.
The thing is in the last two years we've been together I really have grown a lot. I'm a lot of yielding and selfless, I work harder to compromise and I no longer push her away as much as I used to. Who is to say I can't get better with being attracted to her?
I've actually never been to Santa Barbara, I'd move there for her topkek
Seriously though, you're being selfish, don't lead her on like this, it's only hurting her because you want to have a partner
A good aspect of a successful relationship is making each other better people.
This is a rhetorical question but are you doing anything to make her a better person?
Remember what I said earlier. This is give and take. Now is the time to give.
Of course I want to have a partner, and she wants a partner too. That is another thing I love about her is she views relationships as partnerships, which means we support each other equally, and that means in finances. She makes more than enough on her own and... I just don't want to get out and date again because too many girls expect to be taken care of completely, no reciprocation, especially when they find out how much money I make.
She's told me that I help her strive to be a better person... so I suppose?
So what is your problem? You have a good thing.
At this point I'm just repeating myself. But throw away your silly fetish. Like I said before, it will only end in heartbreak if there is no sexual attraction. Best start the damage control early then waste her time.
Well, we've been together for over two years... 'early' for anything isn't likely.
Just about everyone wants a partner, but it seems like you're only with her because of that reason. Trust me m8, I know the feel, it's damaging to everyone
I wouldn't mind dating her if she came here to CA :^]
>all the pics getting taken down because of blue board
you fucked up twice OP
I have taken your advice, don't think I'm ignoring it. I'm just keeping the conversation flowing.
Unless her work moves her out there I doubt she'll be in California for awhile.
>pics getting taken down
Eh, some people saw them. Good enough, right?
I'm just messing around OP, even if she did come to California, how would we meet? What are the odds that one day I'll be out and about and I'll meet this girl? Would you introduce us? What are the odds she'd even be interested in me if we met? Other than some nice pics, I know nothing about this woman.
kek, she's probably way older than me, everyone on this board seems older than me (19)
if you want her to be fat
go be fat with her
what you do is workout a bunch(w/ her)
and do tons of cheat days
get her fat and bearmode
also get her testosterone boosters considering you're a closet faggot :^)
Except she's very healthy and doesn't like junk foods. So that wouldn't work.
I know, I'm just messing too.
You're 19? Yeah we're both much older than you. I've been on 4chan off and on since 2004.
Seriously, it's alright here in the golden state, not sure if I'd live in Santa Barbara, too south for me, but to each their own. It seems to me like if you live anywhere along the coast or in the bar area it's all liberals and hippies, or swagbro gooks with their stanced Hondas, once you get into the valley everyone is the opposite politically and the bigger the truck, the cooler you are.
And figure your shit out OP, she sounds like a wonderful and loving woman, is the fact she's not chubby really that big of a problem for you?
>is the fact she's not chubby really that big of a problem for you?
It is for my dick and my already very low sex drive.
I've also been out to California for work so I definitely know what you're talking about. She likes SB because its just a nice place overall. You get the perks of LA without having to actually deal with LA.
She wouldn't be interested. She's very straight.
The thing is when I do meet chubbies they all have horrid personalities and I really don't want to put in the effort of dating again when I already found something very good.
If she doesnt like junk food, OP, I will tell you this.
Why are you caring about this? What is this shit an ode to IM GOING TO BREAK UP WITH MY GF
Quit being such a faggot OP and stop jerking off to fattie porn.
She takes care of her body for you, and if you DONT then get the fuck >out.
Its a two way street buddy.