I am 25 and male. Never had sex.. My issue is that I feel as if people don't take me seriously. People seem to be able to tell I am a virgin(some fucking how) without me saying anything to them about it.
Like imagine if I were in any position of leadership. Whoever I am leading wouldn't take me serious. How could anyone take a male who hasn't had sex with a woman before serious?
What do women think of this? Can you take a virgin male serious about anything?
What sucks mostly is that I am super depressed about this. I am depressed about how non-existent my sex life is.
What even is a healthy sex life? If I had sex with prostitutes, is that a healthy sex life?
My cousin killed himself on his 24'th birthday because he was a virgin lonely aspie... just like his twin borther, and me haha, but we're still alive for some reason.
Everyone takes it differently.
It truly doesn't matter. We have a 44 year old virgin at work, some people would crack jokes every once in a while, but it was nothing more than jokes. The guy was a really good worker.
>don't know what it's like to be a adult because haven't had sex
Are you just being retarded or same fagging?
You're not going to be "a changed man" from busting a nut in a girl. Literally nothing will change.
You don't get it.. Its not busting the nut that changes you. Its the PROCESS of getting to that point of busting the nut in a girl that changes you. You have to do crazy shit to get a girl into bed. Take risks and what not. Its not easy. Its pretty much a rite of passage.
>Literally nothing will change.
My self confidence around women will probably change.
If you've ever been down under for a while, you know that for you subconcious mind, reality counts.
If you know subconciously that you are retarded or that things are fucked up, you will feel bad about it despite whatever lies you tell yourself.
It's the same with girls. If you know subconsiously that you have never had sex, you will be nervous and screw up around girls, just because you know this.
I DO get it
I used to be JUST like you. I used to be so fucking stressed over being a virgin it was pathetic. After years and years of trying I finally lucked out in 2012 and did it. And guess what? After the deed was done and she left, I went upstairs and sat on my couch in disbelief. Why? Because I was so stressed and built up with anxiety about how "I HAVE TO GET LAID" over literally nothing. I didn't feel like a changed person, or "more of a man" because I finally did it. Sex doesn't do that. It's just a act. It's really not a big deal, I didn't understand that at the time because nobody told me that. But it's truly not anything big like you're making it.
You don't understand shit. It's not the act of fucking, it's the act of relating in society. Bein surrounded by people that usually had sex in their teens, and have had mentally grown from those experiences. They can relate and hold conversations about their sex life with other people. Having never hugged anyone at 30 and being in an enviorment, like work, where people ask you your civil status and expect you to have kids, is fucked up.
Most women don't want to train a partner sexually, they want someone who knows what they are doing, how to be assertive how to command them. This is a feeling you will never understand if you are not an old virgin. Each day is like being a child in a grown man's body, with people that think you are their peer but will be weirded out by you when they learn how little you can contribute.
>They can relate and hold conversations about their sex life with other people. Having never hugged anyone at 30 and being in an enviorment, like work, where people ask you your civil status
That really doesn't matter. I've only had sex 3 times every. And I don't talk about it. Nobody gives a shit, even if I was a virgin nobody would TRULY give a shit. And kids? I'm not going to get married or have kids. So society can say whatever they want. But it truly doesn't matter. It's not worth getting worked up over.
That's not what I'm saying
You're overthinking it. I think that was his point.
You're not a child in a grown man's body.
Seriosly you know it's not even true.
Relationships are nice in ways. I don't know it all, because i've had quite little of them myself, but it's different than what you think.
I think it's something with being young actually, you think you need to measure up to the average of your age group.
Then eventually when you get older, everyone grows further and further apart and you realize eventually that everyone is different.
So there are not really any standards you have to live up to besides the standards that you set for yourself.
I wouldn't really think much of it. And hopefully he'd feel the same about me NOT being a virgin. There's going to be weird hangups no matter what the past is between 2 people.
I think it would bother me a little if a guy lost his virginity to a hooker though.
Well, what is he gonna feel like, getting the leftovers from Jamal and Chad.
He's always going to think about what it would have been like to have >>16406709 when she was in her teens.
He never did anything in his teens.
It's going to feel unfair aswell, and trigger a lot of subonsious jeallousy.
That's why you should stay away from virgin peopel in general i guess.
The problem here is that you think about your virginity too much than you actually being a virgin. To answer your question, YES people will still take you seriously as a virgin just not on sex advice
i'm 26. i'm also a Sergeant in state military. I've led and taught platoons of people. i'm also a virgin.
I'm pretty sure not being a virgin makes you any more qualified for anything, except maybe being a male prostitute.
Standards are set by culture. Having a large group of male straight friends, sex will come up. Playing some stupid game like I have never, sex comes up. Meeting new people, past relationships come up. These are things most take for granted, but they always remind you of your ineptness in even getting a hug. It's not overthinking it's having to relate to people on another level than trivialities.
If you have real friends you can talk to them about it and it's no big deal.
Don't hang with shitheads.
Most of my friends are male, i don't have this problem at all.
Also, if they really do care, isn't that just fun, i mean chock people and watch their long faces or stares, like when they try to comprehend that this completely "normal guy" is actually totally abnormal.
I think it has some value to it. I dunno, maybe it's just me.
>Tfw you can only ever pick dare on truth or dare
Truth is too painfull
>tfw when sex topic comes up and you need to slip out quietly
Sometimes it comes up by accident. I get what you mean by "ineptness of getting even a hug", like the sex itself isn't that important but all the things that lead up to it, like bonding with other people and other social milestones you've failed to reach. And at 26 you're practically at the end of what could be considered naive and innocent. Now it's just awkward and embarrassing.
It's not a big deal. I'm 25, never had a relationship before and only have had sex 1 time. So I know how it is anon, just stop caring. True friends won't actually disrespect you for it. And yes I know what you mean if like you're at work and your male co-workers are talking about all the crazy stuff they did in college and I'm just there all quiet cause I don't know shit. But I don't let it get to me :)
Oh, one more thing. Usually when you're in this position, you usually lack any female companionship or attention, cos (for me) shyness/social ineptness is overwhelming, so you just don't bother.
That part kinda stings.
Easier than people with no personalities. I know one guy with yellow teeth that gets laid more than me. I know one crazy black guy who looks like a car hit his face gets laid more than me.
Both those guys are with chicks way above there league (in terms of looks).
They tell me its all about confidence. I Still don't understand the fuck they mean.
You can always lie. Keeping some aspects of your personal life, aside from women, private helps with this. Have a tale developed down to the last detail.
The girl is obviously outside of your friend group and is a 1 time deal. She was attractive enough given how much you had to drink. Maybe you shot your load up her nose; maybe you did not get off. It is a bullshitter's game so load up that sack of bullshit and let it spew at the right time,.
Also I imagine most guys have bullshit stories like this as well. One of my friends claimed him and his other group of friends climbed the fence to a local private pool and that he had sex with this 8.5/10 in the shallow end of the pool on the stairs. I doubt that happened
Don't listen to that shit, I'm the 25 year old above who's only had sex once. Anyways, the whole whale thing is bs. It's for people who don't care. Personally I think it would be disgusting to fuck a land whale, and the 1 girl I did have sex with wasn't all that great looking, and I regret it. I kinda wish I was still a virgin over stooping lower
i'd literally rather die than settle for a fat girl. that doesnt make me shallow, I pride myself on fitness. and I see people all the time that settle for what they can get and it makes me sad.
never settle, for anything. i'd rather be single than the guy fucking a 5/10 just to not be alone.
Exactly. And realize this, the majority of guys don't bang 7/10+. And when guys say "Man I've fuck 40+ girls" probably 90% of those are nasty hoodrats.
That's why I don't care that I don't have sex, because it doesn't matter. I'm not missing anything. I already accept that I'm not one of those gifted individuals who actually can pull hotties with ease.
yeah I dont care about people that brag about body counts. anyone can sleep with a 4/10 bar skank.
i'd rather have standards and sleep with someone im genuinely attracted to. im not going to fuck anything that spreads its legs, im not that desperate.
>Assume everyone is a liar
I always find that in this type of threads, this kind of post seems to miss the point that usual 4chan pre-wizards barely talk to women, or dudes outside their circle for that matter. It's not really about the sex, more the lack of interaction with the rest of society.
>What do women think of this?
Most of us don't care.
> Can you take a virgin male serious about anything?
Yes, why would someones sexual experience impact their ability to be knowledgeable or right in other areas?
This reminds me of a Sun Kil Moon song for some reason. It's a kind of sad and uplifting story at the same time
Anyways don't do prostitutes, OP. Really don't. And I'm not talking about STDs.
my point is that who you are as a person isnt dictated by the amount of people you fuck.
that doesnt make you a man, or woman. intimacy is great and all, but you aren't any less of a person if you dont sleep around a lot.
>taking american teen dramas seriously
>being so brainwashed by the medias telling you that being a man means just benis in bagina :DDDD
>getting literally cucked by stereotypes
That's it my good goys right there hehe
Nathaniel Hawthorne was a virgin until 38.
Hugh Hefner was a virgin until 22, in a day when people married very young. He then got cucked by his first two wives even though he remained completely faithful to him, but he still gets more pussy at 84 then 95% of the men on this board.
>my point is that who you are as a person isnt dictated by the amount of people you fuck.
Are you ignoring my point on purpose? Most of the virgins here are ALSO social hermits, i.e. they've missed out a lot of life's milestones and being a virgin is just the most glaring one.
Hugh Hefner is probably the worst example you could have given, it pretty much proves my point.
They decided to stay virgin, like religious do, and the fact that they have to be listed says enough.
OP didn't choose to be virgin. People who are forced to remain virgin don't win at life.
i'm 27, male, virgin, and am actually really pleased with my decisions. i actually avoided sex when i could have had it (and still could quite easily enough).
what you guys are talking about re "the process of getting there" is exactly why i like this. i DON'T want to relate to the masses in society, i LIKE feeling different, unusual.
but i don't feel left behind or immature, because i have very mature interests and my personality is very mature and dominant (i.e., i'm not some bitch ass submissive virgin).
all the rigmarole around sex is stupid anyway, stop acting like people learn some great esoteric wisdom from learning how to seduce a girl. people addicted to love and sex waste their lives chasing these things. if you can remain comfortably free of it, you can focus on much higher things and really activate your intelligence.
fyi, i intend on never having sex, and turning down any roads that seem to lead to it.
you cant associate sex with social success
even a loser can fuck bar whores, it means nothing. what if someone focuses on school? or is accomplished yet doesnt care about dating much?
is a guy sleeping with escorts weekly more of a man?
In work and that you should be taken seriously, if you know what your job is. Competence is there for all to see.
Taken seriously as a man to your friends, probably not entirely, but some of that will be because of the issues which make you a virgin (lacking confidence or whatever), not because you are a virgin
Definitely the talk turning to sex and experience and you sit there quietly is pretty embarrassing. Knew that feel.
I lost my virginity to escorts, and saw a lot of them for about 2 years. Raised my self-esteem a lot. Have a bit more confidence with women, feeling I could not mess up when having sex with a woman, no more anxiety about what I'm missing out on. A lot of really enjoyable sex, which just improves your mood, like if you found a really great tv show and could watch it and make a shitty day ok.
Everyone's different though, probably helps I don't value virginity in women, am not religious, don't think less of women who sell it.
Lel you are not "forced" to remain a virgin. You can go to Nevada and fuck a hooker legally anytime, or Asia, or even on the sly. You could also go for super bbw chicks who don't care what you look like as long as you have a dick.
No, the reason you are a virgin is because you choose to be, that there is some base standard for what you consider to be your morals or what makes a girl fuckable.
Once I came to realize this, I calmed down a lot more and had more chicks interested in me despite being chubby as fuck.
>don't think less of women who sell it
they're not women, only sexual objects, prostitution should be legal, but the whores should be obliged to tell any potential partner that they are/were so.
No, it's about being realistic about your standards as a person, and if you don't like them, improve yourself until you can take girls that reach your standards.
I want to become God Emperor of Earth, does me not achieving that at the age of 23 make me less of a man? No, it makes me delusional.
OP, it's obvious when men over 20 are virgins because you can tell by their body language it bothers them. I work with a virgin in his 20s and he's the most boisterous, hasty person I know. A solid guy and can do his job but the over compensation is unbelievable.
You've most likely worked yourself into a this mental state over years and haven't been aware of the change but you just project virgin.
In regards to being respected in a position of leadership - of course you wont be you're 25. Fuck I don't give a shit what age any of my superiors are - I'll listen to them but I don't respect them. You're just a human being at the end of the day and it sounds like you're in some corporate environment so I have no need to respect you any more or any less just because you get paid more than me. In a military or government environment I can understand showing respect to leaders but I'm not brown nosing you just to get a file done on time or what ever.
It's not about sex, I respect those who don't care about sex, like >>16408311. It's about realizing you're not good enough (yet) to achieve your goals, it doesn't matter how high they are, you will still feel like a loser.
You got shitload of responses OP but im gonna reply anyway. Didn't read the thread, im too drunk for that shit.
Sex isn't the issue at all. People don't take you seriously because you linked a bunch of shit irrelevant to being a virgin, met some people, felt the pressure of not getting laid, and then acted out on it subconsciously and everyone noticed.
thats what happens.
You know what I did to get laid? I worked a 112 hour pay period lifting and banding barrels while also trying to finish my shitty grindcore bands demo in my small free time. I was so tired and so out of fucks I went to a clubs shitty rap show to support local artists, met this chick I just actually enjoyed talking too and somehow got laid thanks to the RNG god. 3 sexless short lived relationships later I end up banging a crazy stripper who introduced me to the pleasures of choke sex.
Its all about shutting down the part of your mind that tells you your a social fuck up and you can actually be yourself. I have a friend who didn't get laid until he was 27 and he was and is the coolest motherfucker around.
Point is OP that your gonna be fine. Don't let yourself be a fucking moron by thinking sticking your dick in someone truly affects your social skills.
>What do women think of this? Can you take a virgin male serious about anything?
I would say i have personally not any problems taking virgins serious, but i would maybe say some people can't
Stop hating yourself, the reason it shows is probably because you are very nervous and not very confident, you need to ignore the fact that you're a virgin, are you ugly? do you have some special thing that makes you repulsive? are you fat acne filled? are you nervous when you talk with people? (girls included)
remember, sticking your dick in a wet hole isnt going to make you a better person. it might make you feel better for a little while, but it isnt going to make you a good person or suddenly happy.
if you werent happy before sex you wont be happy after it.
Remeber, winning the lottry or gradutating college won't make you happy.
It might make you feel better for a little while, but it isnt going to make you a good person or suddenly happy.
if you werent happy before sex you wont be happy after it.
Nothing in life will make you happy if you aren't happy already.
try to have confidence in yourself. it's fine to be a virgin, the goal is to not be self conscious about it. say you're waiting for the right person, work on bettering yourself and get to the point where you're comfortable with yourself rather than trying to complete yourself with (pointless) sex. I don't know, I was in a rush to lose it and I regret it now and I have trauma related to it. obviously you want to feel attractive to people, I promise confidence is most of that, even if you're a virgin
I'm a female virgin (mostly) involuntarily at 22. It happens.
By mostly involuntarily, I mean I've had chances, but not with anyone I was remotely interested in.
I have friends that are virgins and friends that are massive sluts, but you wouldn't know which is which from looking at them or seeing how they act in normal situations.
If you don't look like this while fucking, you're not having serious sex.
The only thing that makes you a loser, is that you are constantly losing your own imaginary game. Just stop playing.
Your problem isn't that you havent had sex, its that you are making up excuses. Be grateful for what you have / get, and try to actively pursue a good life. Stop complaining or make up excuses, just better yourself for your own sake... because its healthy (dont get obsessed or superficial).
>It's not a bad thing in girls.
Not really, the acceptability window maybe a tad larger, but you don't want to get it on with a cat lady.
Unless you're REAL possessive like a guy I knew who married his (1st!) cousin since every other chick he had sex/relationship with was by default a whore according to him.
Well... the pope has never had sex and people takes him very seriously. Women are good detecting insecurity and selfhate. Things like the way you stand, walk, the tone of your voice and the way you defend ( or don't defend your opinions) usually give a clue on how strong and secure you are. Wear your virginity like a flag and they won't use it to harm you. Damn.. some girl might even want to take it if you look strong and cool. Just don't try it too hard cause that will also be detected as insecurity.
I'm gonna give you the realest answer in this thread, because I've been through what you've been through and I've overcome it (sort of) after struggling with it a lot.
Yes, people will judge you. Especially women. Because people are dipshits.
You have two options:
1. Go fuck hookers.
2. Move to a society and culture in which male and female celibacy/virginity is the norm; i.e. a place where the Sexual Revolution never took place. This could be either somewhere in the Muslim world, or India, or Nepal, or any other place of your choosing. There you will be the normal, not the outlier.
>Sex isn't that big of a deal. Don't worry about it so much
>haha look at that loser he can't even get laid
>afk going to have sex but don't worry its not a big deal or anything else
I wish you normalfags wouldn't be so fucking hypocritical
I have a good paying job, a house, friends, and a college degree but I'm still a kissless virgin. Does that make me a loser? By the general definition of society I'm a normal averagely successful male who contributes to society.
losing your virginity is not hard, you just need to get your shit together. I had these same feelings, had to lie about my virginity the whole time. but lost it some weeks ago, at 21. I then realized how fucking easy this shit is. I just asked the girl out, did stupid shit through the city and then drove to a motel.
The sex was terrible, I had to tell her the truth because of how awkward everything was, but I realized that the act of getting a girl there in first place was piss easy. The only thing that prevented me all these years basically was not having my own car, and not asking for tips from my close friends (I asked a friend where to fuck her, he told me about the place I took her, I was clueless without his help)
There really should be a lower age limit of 25+, you bastards still have time to make mistakes.
>I have a good paying job, a house, friends, and a college degree but I'm still a kissless virgin. Does that make me a loser? By the general definition of society I'm a normal averagely successful male who contributes to society.
Maybe elaborate on that part since I have 'friends' too but they more like acquaintances. They're usually the weak link in the chain.
20 year old gent who lost my V-card at 17 here
I look at nobody any different. Everyone gets theirs in their own time, man. I don't even feel any different than I did before. I still beat it to the same porn, the same way, and get about my day
Honestly, just understand that there's more to the world than your dick
Ride a bike
Shoot a gun
Just stop thinking with your head, and start thinking with your head
You have it all wrong dude. You think that's hapening because "ppl can tell u didnt have sex" when in fact you're just a beta cuck who doesn't have what it takes. It has nothing to do with sex, it's a mindset.
People won't take you seriously if you don't take yourself seriously. It sounds like you feel unconfident because you're a virgin; people can't guess that you're a virgin, but they can see your lack of confidence.
Try lying to yourself a bit, pretend you're not a virgin. Wouldn't that make you feel or act differently, if it were true? Believe in yourself and others will follow.
>No I have actual friends. A decent amount of them too.
Then I guess it boils down to you, as in your personality. Maybe you're too boring or irritating.
It could still be your friends though, are they 4chan incarnate?
No, I have a wide variety of friends. Some of 4chan style, some are normalfags who hardly use computers, some are in between. I've been told it's my low self confidence that fucks me over. Maybe I'm a shitty person too, Idk. Either way I'm probably going to go to the bunny ranch at the end of the year to get rid of this virginity.
>It's not as vague as a seems I promise. It only seems that way because you're ignoring that which is in front of you.
What's in front of me? I don't know any dudes with even remotely the same boring interests as me, let alone any chicks that take interest in this crap.
WOah, check those trips.
>I've been told it's my low self confidence that fucks me over. Maybe I'm a shitty person too, Idk.
Do you have any female friends? Most (all) of my friends are male, and I barely talk any women, so when a moment arises, I have fuck all to say.
>Either way I'm probably going to go to the bunny ranch at the end of the year to get rid of this virginity.
I doubt that'll solve the underlying issue.
23 years old kissless virgin here, alone again on a Friday night, I don't feel like a normal person in this society, I don't even want to go out anymore and see all the couples shopping/walking/sitting in restaurants...Never had an intimate moment with a girl, except for that time when I had an erotic massage from a hooker
I'm so desperate, I'm literally crying as I write this. I'm not what you would consider a total loser : I'm a student at a top school in Europe, I would say I'm smarter than most, and not ugly (I was complimented a few times on dating apps and on the street, but this was outside Europe though)
What do I do to change this ? Be confident ? My self confidence was shattered during my high school years where I was bullied and mocked by the popular people, I still haven't fully recovered from that as you may have guessed
Yes. One of my best friends is female and if I seriously asked her she'd probably have sex with me but it'd fuck up our friendship. But yes, I do have other female friends.
It won't but hey at least I wouldn't be a virgin anymore.
>Can you take a male who hasn't had sex seriously?
Is it by choice? if so, yes, if not, no.
I don't take anyone over the age of 22 who generally lack life experience seriously, if you haven't done interesting things and been to places, then you are probably boring.
>I'm so desperate, I'm literally crying as I write this.
Did you really need to tell us that?
Common census is aim low, but I live somewhere where it's looks like a boohoo commercial in the day and the wire at night, so there's nothing low for me to aim at. Maybe there is something low for you to aim at where you live?
>Yes. One of my best friends is female and if I seriously asked her she'd probably have sex with me but it'd fuck up our friendship. But yes, I do have other female friends.
I'm really at a loss with you, I don't know what to say. You're a special case on 4chan.
You must've fucked up in a previous life.
That or you're holding back on something.
She's also used to guys way more attractive than me so that's probably why we haven't even considered fucking each other. Also I'm not exactly the most attractive guy. It kinda sounds beta but its not.
Oh well. Thanks for listening to me. Just know that not all virgins are total fucking losers.
>tfw pious Christian and I don't have to put up with your hedonistic worldly bullshit
>being black has nothing to do with it
newsflash women don't date animals
even nigger women don't want their own men
I legitimately have autism (diagnosed by 2 doctors) that prevents me from interacting normally with people. I was a virgin too until and the age of 25 and was seriously considering suicide because of this. I was even hospitalized twice for suicide attempts.
Finally decided to get a hooker and now use hookers/escorts exclusively. Best decision ever.
>I legitimately have autism (diagnosed by 2 doctors)
>I paid two professional rationalisers to justify my lifetime social failure for me
You don't have autism anon. You have a failed life that needed a sweeter sounding title.
Not really. Some people just don't have contact with anyone to have sex with.
I'm 24, virgin and I've been living alone at the end of the world. My only human contact for the last 1.5 years have been talking on skype / phone with my people back at home.
I'm doing this to get a shit ton of money, come bak home and build the life that I want with my own hands without debt and shit.
It feels bad to be alone, but feels good knowing I actually did shit with my life.
mate it's not women. you think you failed some other shit and are too low to even talk to females. and the stuff you do is never good enough.
don't do stuff to differentiate youself from others. you want to do stuff that brings the whole group forward.
yes, that is totally contradictory to human progress and socialist as fuck, but see it as a necessity. think about how much more calm and creative you are at your workplace if half of you brain is NOT occupied with worrying if you social status is okay or if anyones going to attack you any minute.
do some shit for other people, you know you did fine when a warm feeling of acceptance arises in your chest.
women will see you smiling and want to know what's going on. get a status and they'll love ya.
>Like imagine if I were in any position of leadership. Whoever I am leading wouldn't take me serious.
Why do you retards continue to use the topic of virginity as bait.
For those taking this sort of shit seriously, no, nobody except you cares whether you have sex or not. Virginity doesn't disqualify you for anything except maybe sex with specific snobs but those people aren't worth giving love anyways.
mediocre as fuck
I 100000% agree with you. When I got (and continue to get) laid I changed as a person. I could speak to an audience and really project my voice with authority and even sometimes that cheeky sexy swagger you see in the movies when I'm having a good day. Before this, my friends all have had sex before me (One of my friends became a dad at 15...) and never held conversations with me about it. I didn't understand why, but now i do. They didn't want me to feel as if I didn't achieve something or whatever. That plus it'd be like they're teasing me, and they didn't want to do that obviously.
Nope, I agree with that guy. I care about the act, the journey, and the state of mind.
Lesson: Get laid. Get laid again. Get laid some more.
Doesn't matter if it's with one person, many times, or many people once. Whatever works for you.
Case in point, an anon who's too fucking stupid to understand the post he is replying to.
Look, moron, he said it wasn't the act itself that is the issue but not completing the usual social rites to get to the act.
He wasn't saying to have sex with a hooker.
You fucking moron.
I ran a project for about a year as a 21yr old virgin. 100 people trusted in my leadership, a few annoying yesmen.
It collapsed but that was inexperience and lack of planning, not being a virgin that did it. 22yr old virgin now and I'm getting ready to launch a new largerscale buisness.
But you will be a 'changed man' from having a sexual relationship with a girl.
Your post is like telling a neet that still lives with his parents that "literally nothing will change from moving out". Yeah the act of moving out will change nothing in him, but the experience of living on his own will.
With that said, it's not the end of the world. Most people have several 'gaps' in knowledge/experience. Being a virgin is just one of many possible gaps, and if it's your only or biggest gap then you're in luck because it's pretty easy to fill it in.
You're equating being a virgin with being the reason as to why you struggle in aspects of life.
It's probably more likely to assume that the problems that have prevented you from having sex are the same ones impeding other aspects of your social life, as opposed to it being the absence of that act in and of itself.
You can try to fix those issues, such as being overly shy or introverted, without them yielding sex, and it will improve your performance in social situations. The sex itself doesn't do a whole lot; it's just that you're equating the absence of it with social problems you have, when it's actually the absence of those social skills that are the reason for your lack of sex and the other problems you have.
I didn't lose my v-card until I was in my early twenties. masturbation and watching porn proved useful so that when I finally got some action I knew what I was doing and she had no clue that it was my first time until I told her after a few weeks of hooking up.
not that this is a serious thread to begin with.
People tend to project character flaws that bother them outward without thinking. Get over it and be more mindful of yourself and what's around you.
People act like sexual conquest gives you brass balls. Couldn't be further from the truth. If anything it's the other way around.
Can you take a man who has only had sex once, at a college party when both participants where so drunk they remember almost nothing, seriously? What about a man who's had sex twice? What about thrice? Or four times? Or five? Or twenty? Or 50? Or 100? Or 10,000?
I'm a 27 year old virgin, and I use to have that mind set, but want to hear something? At my job, which is admittedly shitty because I really only started getting my shit together recently, I have more responsibilities than my co-workers, am trusted by the managers, more or less in a position when I am a manager in everything but name and writing the schedule, among other stuff. Me being a virgin means nothing. It is all about your own mindset. Oh, and I am going to be going a date soon too. So a female takes me seriously enough to go on a date with me. Just saying.
You think people don't take you serious. That is a product. You think that people don't take you serious because you haven't had sex (sex is a product)
You're thinking that the first comes from the latter, when really they're both products of the same thing (equation). It's about the kind of person you are (equation).
having sex won't change what you are doing (if/ and how people see you). The opposite is more true where changing what you're doing and how people see you will lead to sex, in your ideal circumstances; a perfect system.
It's roughly natural selection. People think they know what undesirable behaviour looks like in terms of men to women, and then they apply that to yourself. concluding their doubt of you having had sex.
that's just in the case you were talking about anyway. Say in the situation where there's the two of you. two co-workers, both male. You have an idea about making something more efficient on the job or in the workplace. The difference between them taking you seriously or not should be relating to your points and your 'argument', not if you've had sex. if you get down into the objective points so you can avoid as much opinion as possible, then the 'correct' action should come clear. if you can't or don't reach this conclusion, then maybe you should think through everything. get to know yourself better. Be a happy person when you're by yourself. The saying "You have to love yourself, before you can love someone else" is said for a reason you know.
If you think "Oh, but I can't love myself because I'm not a 'man' or I haven't had sex then go fucking check your fundamentals. if you can't do that then you're fucked man and natural selection has claimed you.
It's late and I can't be bothered checking what if I said makes sense, so screw it.
If I could design my own society -- getting sex would literally just require "Do you want to have sex?" (Yes or No).
I hate the idea of having to take someone out, buy some, walk around trying to flirt and come up with random nonsense, and then having to cleverly find a way to lure them into a bed to have sex.
I just wish everything was more upfront.
I'm nearly 25 and still a virgin.
Last December my coworker asked me what I was getting for my girlfriend (Christmas). I told her there is no girlfriend... she was seriously shocked. Almost disappointed and so confused as to why because according to her i'm "so cute and handsome". I didn't even tell her i'm a virgin because that would have put her into even further confusion. In terms of my societal position (besides my low tier retail job) i'm in good standing in terms of social groups, going to parties, and dressing fairly well. I work out about 3 times a week and eat very healthy food.
But where it becomes strange is that women tend to lock eyes with me quite often (used to never happen until this last year), for once women are finally just now starting to notice me because of the effort I invested into myself.
But still a virgin, yet I keep seeing women glance down at my crotch all the time. Ya know... sometimes I kinda want to be that guy where when I tell them i'm a virgin they'll never believe me.