Im going to share the story of how I fucked a girl who I thought was my cousin.
First some backstory, my whole life I thought that this girl was my cousin. I never thought otherwise because we were so close, I also thought that her Mom was my aunt and her Dad was my uncle(obviously). Turns out they were just family friends but, lets not get too deep in.
>"Cousin" texts me
>"Hey anon wanna come come camping with us"
>"Sure sounds cool"
>It was spring break and it was for 3 days so why not
>get to cousins house around 7pm
>ring door bell
>cousin opens the door
>get a huge hug
>walk in and realize no ones home
>we were both hungry so I made us some fucking bagel bites
>bitches dig bagel bites
>asks if i know how to dance
>"not a clue"
>says her school is throwing a dance after spring break and she wants to practice
>tell her i could try to help
>go to the living room and she puts on some stupid shake your ass nigger music
>awkwardly stand there while she shakes her ass
>starts to grind on me
>"THE BAGLE BITES ARE GETTING COLD"
>she stops the music and we finish the food
>parents come home
>get all of our shit ready for the next day
>its pretty late
>she tells me im sleeping in her room
Sorry niggas no pre-typed but i will try to be quick
and i forgot to mention that she is the same age as me
>go to her room
>only one bed
>"uh that bed isnt big enough for the both of us"
>she throws a blanket on the floor
>fuck that shit
>grab a computer chair
>shit on that shit instead
>she turns off the lights and throws the remote at me
>"put something on anon"
>the OG friday the 13th is on
>"ANON NO THIS IS SCARY"
>"dont be a baby"
>two seconds into the movie she gets scared
>tells me to sit next to her
>move next to her and she grabs my arm
>get to the scene where that nigga gets the arrow through his neck
>wakes up aunt
>she sees what is going on and tells me i should sleep on the couch in the living room
>think about her all night
>wake up the next day
>get in the car and head to the camping ground
>after getting lost several times we get to the camping grounds
>the camping place had one lodge where you could buy fire wood and shower
>set up a 4 person tent in the woods near a big ass river
>aunt promises on day 2 we will go rafting
>we sleep in a row, Me, Uncle, Aunt and cousin
>Sleep early to get rest for the rafting tomorrow
>Wake up first(i am also a very light sleeper)
>get up to pee
>everyone is asleep
>cousins blanket is half off
>staring at her tits
>probably like B's but they were perky
>go pee behind a huge ass tree and fap to the thought of her tits
>everyone wakes up an hour later and we go to the lodge to rent some rafting equipment
>everyone changes into bathing suits
>holy fuck cousin looks hot
>put all the shit into our raft, and put on our life vests
>cousin can barley get hers on because of her tits
>tits popping out
>push the raft into the water and go on our way
Day 3 is kinda long so going to type it separately
and im not proof reading so sorry for any errors
>walk into HER house and start making food like you own the place
>puts on scary movie and she wakes up her mother in fear
you dun goofed there
>not fitting in a life jacket
confirmed for never seeing breasts
DAY 3 NIGNOGS
>been rafting for about 20 mins now
>get to a rough patch of water
>raft is going ape shit
>everyone is holding on to the sides trying not to fall in
>see a big ass rock and try to steer clear of it
>cant row fast enough
>we titanic now
>hit the rock at full force
>cousin gets throw across the raft
>catch her and crop the field pretty hard
>uncle was laughing his ass off
>cousin blushed and laughed it off
>finally get to a normal section of the water and we eat and get out of the river
>we get back to the camping site and go to sleep
>the next morning get woken up by the noise of liquid hitting the bottom of the tent
>what the fuck
>open one eye and see my cousin squatting, ass facing me
>dis nigga is taking a piss on the floor
>pretend im asleep so she dosent notice
>stare at her ass
>aunt wakes up and smacks the shit out of her
>boner is lost
>wtf just happened
>go back to sleep
>wake up and get our shit and drive home
Okay /b/ros my bad im gunna cut out all the small details
I get home and we dont speak until spring break of next year
she asks me to go camping again.
GOD DAMNIT THREAD!!! DON'T YOU DIE ON ME!!
bruh, you never cropped a field?
So mah crackers
>next year three day thing again
>parents go off on a hike or some shit
>we alone me lookin all Pimp like an shit
>anon u have Da biggest muskelz
>gurl lemme peek at chu
>fun her pooper for next 5 hours
>her dad walks in on it and high fives me
>den we all got on da floor and walked Ds dinosawr
"lack toast and tolerant" How are people this stupid.
OP you worthless nigger.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
OP come on
also pissing in the tent what
She just pissed on the floor? What the fuck man wouldn't that shit spread over to your sleeping bag or whatever and just like drench it and everything in piss what the hell did she just think the piss would go away this is weirdest fucking thing I've ever heard
>pissing inside a tent
is ur "cousin" Mexican by any chance?
OP, this is the archive, i'm going to sleep, if this thread 404's and you continue on other thread post the link in the comment section below
Ask and you shall receive
Dude that would be so painful
Thread is dead. OP is a fag. You know what that means.
This is OP
>Hanging out at cousins during spring break break.(Parents gone)
>Start making more bagel bites.
>Cousin has huge tits now.
>Pop a chub
>She sees it and starts grinding on me, I go autist and stand like a deer in headlights.
>She brings me to the couch
>starts stripping our clothes off, still autist.
> Tell her the bagel bites are gonna go cold.(microwave went of like a minute ago)
>She plants her ass in my face.
>She then commences pissing and Shitting in my mouth
>SO GUD CUM IN MUH PANTZ SO HARD
>WE MAKE OUT WITH SHIT PISS AND CUM WHILE SHE CUTS OUR WRISTS THEN WE USE THE BLOOD TO
>Living on the road cuz parents will never understand
>Thas why it took so long to post we had to leave a little diner that had wifi, finally got to another spot
I do love this slut. I wonder if /b/ ever found her I know they were looking