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Best no homo stories.
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 289
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Best no homo stories.

>at a party with my gay friend
> kind of bored, not that many cute faghags
> lesbians are hot, but get hella sjw when i approach one.
> a bit drunk by this point so I decide to sit on the couch and let my friend have his fun
> fellow sits next to me, can tell this guy is gay bait. has all the aesthetics my friends go for
> starts up conversation and find he's a really great guy
> getting a bit late, party is winding down and my friend is off hooking up with this dude
> handsome guy says he's a bit tired and rests his head on my shoulder
> tell him I'm straight, oddly ok with it though
> he tells me he lives there and welcomes me to crash.
> original gay friend is probably gonna bang all night so why not.
> offers me his bed, i say no homo but ok.
> he ends up cuddling with me
>feel his boner hitting me
> ok with it, i'm an accepting guy and i already settled my no homo-ness
> get hard all of a sudden, must be the booze and sexual atmosphere
> proceed to lightly tap his boner with mine in a no-homo sword fight
> he suddenly grabs me tight and my no-homo gets a bit blurred but am still a firm believer this is just playful behavior.
> suddenly feel a hand on my cock, ok with it because it feels good and this guy was really nice
> asks me to do the same, i do 'cause this guy is being really cool with my no homo-ness
> he goes down on me, feels to good won't stop him
> decide to test my no homo-ness to the max and ask if i can return the favor
> realize it's not that big of a deal, it's just sucking dick
> we end up 69ing and blow our wads on each other
> wake up in the morning to sticky sweaty no homo-ness
> get up. find my friend, and leave
> fool around again with the guy once in a while
> no...no homo.
OP is fag
Do many homo
>fucked a guy in the butt
>not my butt so it's not gay

no homo
kek yes homo
It's not gay if you beat him up after
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How the fuck can sucking another dude's dick and then saying "no homo" make it not gay?
>at beach on business trip
>go to bar late night wearing tank top and teal colored board shorts
>get approached immediately by handsome gay guy
>"gay, straight or bi"
>"I'm straight"
>"oh me too" he says
>offers to buy me a drink
>keeps asking if I'm not at least bi
>I think of all the traps I've fapped to
>I hesitate more and more each time
>he starts touching my chest hair
>I excuse myself to bathroom
>look at myself in mirror (holy shit I'm dressed gay as fuck)
>talk to myself about it for minute.... Can't do it
>leave and make quick retreat to parking lot
>he's chasing after me
>asks for a ride

I guess that means I'm not gay.
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I figured you would try to delete your post, fucking faggot
all that means is you're still in the closet
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>I guess that means I'm not gay.
feels good man
The same way saying you would have a threesome with your male friend and then saying no homo is not gay.
Still pretty gay it turns out.
>be 13
>by myself at home
>see if I can suck my own dick
>was able to lick and suck the head
>ribs hurt like fuck afterwards
>stopped doing it once I got too fat
>still come in my own mouth from time to time
>no homo

You're HETEROFLEXIBLE faggot...

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fuck off m8
You're such a fag dude lol.
samefagging to the max.
in fact it's so obvious i'm gonna have to conclude this is bait.

You're casting in the wrong pool.
phew that was a close one.
I think you call that ambisextrious
>on gay hookup site
>end up getting rammed in the shitter by a married guy over his desk a few times
>he's a builder turned white collar
>he asks me if he can bring a couple of friends next time
>get gang banged by three builder types and the married guy in warehouse, draped over bags of concrete
>fucked in the ass by everyone
>couple of loads in my mouth

is this gay?
Back to leddit you go, faggots.
only if you forget to say no homo
depends on how much money you were paid afterwards.
It's only gay is balls touch
i was on my back so i feel quite sure that balls never touched

>my story is actually true
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you replied to the wrong person goddamnit
my payment was gaping so much you could have heard the sea if you put your ear to my asshole
No homo then
>go watch a film with a bro, I drive us there
>we watch some shit film, leave because it's awful
>hang around the mall, talking about shit
>talk about sex, how I wouldnt mind banging a hot guy
>he says he might want to get fucked
>he shaves all over his body, has a nice firm ass and nice lips
>I buy him a pair of tight yoga pants
>we go to the toilets, he puts them on
>we make out, I feel up his ass, he feels up my cock
>he gets on his knees and gives the best head Ive ever had
>fucking him mouth in the stall for a good few mins, unload in his mouth
>he swallows, wipes his mouth and thanks me, giving me such a cute smile

we did this on and off for ages
no, i hadn't even seen >>560788552
when i posted
>Best no homo stories.
>realize it's not that big of a deal, it's just sucking dick
promise me anon
don't ever stop being non-gay
for me
this. i am not interested in a relationship with guys at all but sucking cock and getting rammed is just plain fucking fun. deal with it, labellers
sounds pretty hot
i'm getting a blow job from a cute 20 year old chick on friday while her bodybuilder bf watches and takes pics. is this gay?
>my payment was gaping so much you could have heard the sea if you put your ear to my asshole

It's comments like this that keep me coming back to 4chan.
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sure, for 5 dorrar
> proceed to lightly tap his boner with mine in a no-homo sword fight
so you two were really close, kissing distance, looking at each other... dude, that's full homo, it's way more homo than just butt-fucking him with your shirts on.
only if she's got a boypussy
Im bi so I really dont mind it, Im never letting him fuck me, Im not into that

I dont think he even wants to either
>see ad for a MMF
>husband and wife team
>supposed to be "all for her", only incidental guy contact
>wife is kneeling over my mouth, I'm licking her snatch
>husband is railing her from behind
>he slips out a few times
>let him fuck my mouth before going back in wife's pussy
>he cums, she drips it into my mouth

no ball contact = no home, right?
things i hear all the time
>i'm straight. i just want to wank together and/or kiss

for me that is 1000% gayer than just fucking or being fucked by a dude. what they're talking about it intimacy, what i'm looking for is sex
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Dude its okay. No homo

>b in high school, just finished cross-country practice
>hanging out with buds
>am sophomore and chill with the seniors
>getting kinda late so have to head home
>one senior bro says he can give me ride home cause I am on the way
>am down cause dont wanna walk 2miles
>get in car and he drives slow
>we get in a tickle fight
>no homo cause thats what bros do
>Hes laughing and almost crashes onto an oncoming car
>its okay cause we live and no crash
>think to myself, if this is funny then tickling his dick will be more funny
>Keep broing out and I reach for his dick tickling it
>We both know its no homo and keep laughing
>I realize itll be more funny if I rub him off and make him cum cause itll be totally bro
>I start pumping and laughing and he laughs too
>I make him blow his load all over his pants
>Haha bro no homo
>he drops me off at my house
>cya later bro!

a year later he starts dating my sister and we never talk about our totally no homo bro experience again
>In a party
>Some gay people are there
>I'm pretty drunk
>one approaches me
>"hey there are you here by yourself"
>"no I came with some friends"
>"oh, are you gay?"
>"No, I'm straight"
>a couple of hours later
>finished fucking said gay guy
>balls didn't touch
I actually agree with you on this. Getting my dick wet is less gay than gentle caressing.
So how many pairs of yoga pants did he end up with?
haha, only three, we had to get the right size but he couldnt try them on in the shop since he was "buying them for his GF"

after we got the perfect 3rd one he just wore that one whenever we were horny
>no-homo sword fight
ur gay tho
This was hilarious. Your "I'm not gay, so what's wrong with sucking this dick?" attitude is priceless.
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>reading this thread
>get a boner

Don't quite know how I feel about this
>sitting here with cum in my ass
>Balls didn't touch
>Not gentle touching, just raw ass fucking
>Said no homo every time he thrusted in
>Licked cum off myself and his dick in brojob-like manner
>not clenching butthole to keep cum in

All and all, it was a pretty hetero bonding experience.
/b/ hates the people they are.
>at party with ex and current fuck buddy
>drunkenly make out with and finger ex
>have sex with current FB
>come out to kitchen to get water
>gay friend is there, wasted as me
>says something flirty, I flirt back a bit cause drunk
>grabs me and starts making out
>I reciprocate cause why the fuck not
>feel his scruffy stubble on my cheeks
>instantly hard as fuck
>he starts rubbing my cock through my jeans
>sits down on the sofa
>starts to open my fly
>I mumble something about my FB catching us
>go back to her room and fuck the living shit out of her thinking about that guy
>be me
>be 14
>looking at qt boy in the shower after PE
>catch him looking at me
>quickly look away
>boy comes up to me during break and asks me to come with him
>we go down into an old part of the building not too far away from PE hall
>asks me if I was looking at him
>I freeze and start sweating and hyperventilating
>he says he was looking at me too
>still look shocked
>he kisses me
>looks at me afterwards and asks if I want to come over after school
>I say okay sure
>after school we walk to his house, talking about random things
>decently sized, multiple floors, not mansion though
>his room is on the loft floor
>we go in
>start talking more random things
>eventually he asks if I liked the kiss
>I really did
>he asks if I wanna do it again
>we kiss
>I feel my dick being adamantium hard
>I "adjust" my trousers (an excuse to rub it a little ofc)
>he asks if I wanna stroke together
>at this point I was convinced my dick was going to explode
>we get naked and start stroking ourselves while looking at each other
>came all over ourselves in like 5 minutes
>I went to get TP to clean us up
>after cleanup we were hard again
>naked kissing ensued with our dicks touching
>reached down and touched each other's dicks
>laid back down on the bed and stroked each other
>came 5 minutes later
>cleaned up again
>had to leave because dinner
>spent entire evening stroking

I I forgot to say no homo, and so we ended up doing this a lot, as well as much more.
>Be at bar
>See fancy looking man
>he claims he isn't gay
>I know better
>Try to get him to admit it
>I beg him to cum into my asshole
>He say no
>He leaves
>Hit him over head with a brick
>Start sucking his dick
>He enjoys it
>He's moaning "oh, my head"
>He finally cums
>he falls asleep
>he is clearly satisfied
>I stand up
>I say "I fucking knew you were queer."
>walked away
no homo
holy shit, you are an idiot sir
>guy sucks my dick
>tell him 'no homo' so he won't catch any stds

>see the doctor later that day
>doc says 'no homo' doesn't work like that
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In all seriousness:

>browsing /gif/
>sissy thread?
>can't hurt to check it out
>the idea of dressing up as a girl and being roughly penetrated seems weirdly hot
>I'm fixated on the idea of pleasing a cock; not the guy, just the cock
>realize sister is away
>put on frilly panties, admire my ass
>add tights, denim shorts and crop top
>check myself out in the mirror, hell yeah I'd fuck me
>start masturbating to vid of skinny blonde crossdresser being fucked by group of niggers
>spontaneously put a finger up my ass, Jesus Christ this feels good
>come buckets, as in it's spurting out in streams liked I'm pissing
>this never happens, the most I've got before is a small pool on the tip
>sit down in ecstasy
>a few seconds pass, feel like that was actually kinda dirty, and not in a good way
>holy fuck I am a disgusting subhuman how could I have done that?
>rinse and repeat next week

A-am I a faggot?

Same with me m8, your not alone
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>go to gay club just to see what fags visit such places
>ask a pretty gay-looking guy to show me what gay guys do
>he pulls me to a dark corner
>we start to kiss and i keep laughing in my head because this is just too gay
>he slowly starts rubbing my dick through my pants
>laughing loudly telling him that's totally gay
>move to the toilette with him so he's able to show me some more
>almost crying because of all the laughs
>sucking his dick while he films it with my smartphone camera
>showed it to all my friends to let them know how freaking strange those fucking gay people are
just let the inner homo in you come out, breathe and suck a couple dicks
and make sure you douche your ass if you're going to make your dreams cum true, shit happens too often when you dont know the drill
>Be 14 at friends house also 14
>Playing Vidya as us cool kids do
>As its weekend he invites me to stay the night
>Sounds good, more vidya
>Gets around 1AM we still playing games
>He comes out "I'm Horny, I feel like going for a wank"
>Okay cool?
>Pulls down his trousers and gets his dick out
>But dude it's Hyrule Temple with items
>He starts jerking off while I'm fighting CPUs
>I glance often, he knows I am
>Why don't you join in?
>Pause game, rotate to face him
>Just staring at his dick as he jacks off in front of me
>Wanna touch?
>Grab is dick and start jerking him off
>Start getting into it
>Push him back agains floor, pull his top up, kiss down his belly while I jerk him off
>Kiss down to his dick, suck his dick
>Fucking love it
>Suck his dick some more, kiss down to his balls
>Kneel over him
>Get my dick out
>He sits up and sucks me off
>We jerk/suck some more
>Lay next to eachother and jerk off until we blow our loads on oursevles/eachother
>Was damn fine
This thread makes me laugh my ass off because all you /b/tards arent homo at all, just like to tell shitty fake stories.

Helps me remember why I come on /b/
>/b/ is filled with faggots
>/b/ hates faggots
>put on the panties
>take some pictures
>google "gay hookup sites {whereveryoulive}"
>post pics to hookup sites
>get blown, rimmed and rammed

this shit isn't difficult. don't tell anyone if you don't want to
>Helps me remember why I come on /b/
Because you don't get any action either way and like to imagine our stories actually involve you? Walked right into that one, faggot.
>the idea of dressing up as a girl and being roughly penetrated seems weirdly hot
>A-am I a faggot?
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Do tell...
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Oh shit you got me faggot! You know I love me some cocks.
>make sure you douche your ass if you're going to make your dreams cum true
yeah, this. if you don't have a douche but do have a detachable power head with a strong setting, squat and spray inside also works
Not even a minute after I replied. Smashing F5 for more stories you gay boy?
best no homo
Anything in particular? :3
>literally cannot fathom adult behaviour
come back when you grow some pubes. in the meantime
kill yourself faggot
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>fake stories

Whats F5??

I have a mac because I'm a hipster faggot who loves to get rammed in the ass.
>breathe and suck a couple dicks

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Looks like faggot is all butthurt
But I'm terrified a group of chavs will stab me and steal my clothes.
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Which one of you faggots wants to circle jerk? No homo though
>be 2
>friend is visiting
>mom takes a break from changing my diaper and my friends diaper
>raping my best friend while we are still nude
>he likes it
>find out he is gay and had a crush on me
>turns out im gay too
>no homo
do me a favor and tell us more of those stories
a fellow brit-bong
you'll be fine if you bring clothes with you in a bag to get changed into
plus pikeys dont use gay-meet up sites
nah, there are some time wasters but they're easily sniffed out by mutual picture exchange mostly. those that aren't and just block you or delete their account at the last minute, just ignore. this just isn't a big deal. in the last two weeks i've been blown by a dude who wanted nothing, fucked by a big-dicked slightly older guy, fucked 1 tranny and been blown by another.

>all you have to do is leave the house
>be horny 16 year old virgin with braces
>trying to not fap for a month was a huge mistake
>Go online because I want to do sex things
>someone wants to meet up and fool around in their van. No homo.
>Guy pulls up in his van. Said he was 20, but probably actually 40.
>He's fat and had an obvious erection
>Tells me he runs a business making signs and ask about me
>I lie and tell him I'm 18 in university
>Grabbed my cock and pulled my pants down while driving around for a good place to do no homo stuff
>We climb to the back of his van and I unzipped this dude's pants
>Bro has a micro penis on top of being fat so I feel really sorry for him
>he tries to kiss me but his mustache was rough so I pushed him away." No homo!" I exclaimed loudly.
>I start playing with micro penis. It's smaller than my thumb so no homo
>he lays back and moans as I put my lips on his cock. No homo.
>poor bro has a gigantic belly so I doubt he has even seen how small his penis is
>takes less than 5 minutes for him to cum in my mouth
>I climbed over his stomach so he could see the cum in my mouth
>He smiles and I swallow his load. Anything for a bro. No homo.
definetely no home. I mean you were at theirs right?
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>tfw now have some gay hookup sites open

Still not gay, right? I just want to see what it's like to suck a dick.
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it's good. do it
sure, but no homo
Only if you pushed back
This nigga knoes
well we stopped going into the same toilet after people got suspicious

There's a nice 5 story car-park next to the mall, so
>Id pick him up, get a drive thru mcdonalds, usually just coffee
>park up on one of the car park floors
>he's already wearing dem pants and a tight t-shirt
>start to make out, I kiss his neck and he gets off
>pull my trousers down, cocks already hard
>grab the back of his head and force it towards my hips
>he's chomping on my cock really really fucking nicely
>as he's leant over to my seat blowing me, I feel up his ass, its so plump
>tells me he wants to fuck

>get in the back of the car, pull his yoga pants down
>hes belly down, Im on top
>he's clean shaven, literally a few hours shaven
>slide my cock inside his ass, he moans
>pound him hard, I love the sound of my hips slapping onto his ass
>after a few mins I finish inside him
>We clean up, chill in the car and I take him home
it's only gay if balls are touching
>Be 13
>At friends house with one other friend for halloween
>House is in the middle of forest and noone but us in the house, parents went to party
>Been playing vidya in his room
>Friend has big as bed, there are two sleeping bags on the floor
>Friend says his bed is massive, we could all fit in it
>We agree, don't want to sleep on the fucking floor
>Sitting in bed with the lights off
>I'm in the middle
>Start talking about ghosts and shit
>Friend to my right says "Stfu anon, thats fucking scary"
>He then gets closer to my body and puts one leg over my legs
>Don't say much for a while
>Look over to my friends to my left, hes asleep
>Friend on right puts his hand on my stomach
>He doesn't say anything, nor do I
>He puts his hand under my shirt and starts rubbing my stomach
>Hes breathing heavily
>He puts his hand down to my pajama bottoms and grabs my dick
>Don't really know how to react, but go with it
>He grabs my hand and puts it near his dick
>I reach in and grab his dick
>I face him and we start jacking each other off
>We start kissing
>Do this until we both cum
>Don't say much the morning after

He started inviting me over to his house and we did this for a while
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captcha never lies OP, sry to tell you but op isafag
>be us
>be 2 months after we first came out to and on each other
>be in school
>earlier that year we got a brand new school building with small rooms used for tests and such
>rooms have padding in the wall and sound insulation on the door so people can't cheat
>boy walks up to me as soon as I get out of class
>asks me to come with
>we slip into one of these rooms
>they lock from the inside so he asks me to lock the door
>when I turn back around he's in the process of getting naked
>he gets fully naked and has a rock hard dick
>can feel my trousers tightening too
>he pulls my shirt off and kisses me with his dick poking my stomach
>just as he stops he whispers for me to take my trousers off
>more naked kissing
>he grabs my dick and starts stroking
>I realise we don't want to make a mess either over our clothes or over the floor
>get down on my knees and start sucking his dick
>he cums in my mouth
>keep sucking because he's still hard
>he cums again, swallow again
>he wants to suck me afterwards
>his BJ is a lot better than normal
>cum almost immediately
>he swallows
>he keeps sucking until I cum again
>he doesn't swallow
>he gets up and kisses me with my load still in his mouth
>we both swallow and get our clothes back on

It was a long rest of the day in school before we were able to get home.
8/10. would suck

no homo
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would you take me from semi to steel?
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Dude your dick is perfect, no homo.

Where are you and can I come suck it?
9/11 would suck
no homo
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west london. wanna help me shave?
thank fuck there's no homos looking at my dick. that'd be gay
>both British
Holy shit this is good

can >>560796940 also blow me to?
w-west London too
Haven't told anyone this
>Be 18 Ausfag
>Go visit friend at university
>We go to a party, drink/smoke
>We were hitting on some chicks and got them to come back to his room with us
>Get back drink some more
>Two chicks/me and friend
>Start having foursome
>Lotta fucking, my friend and I switching off every once in a while
>One bitch leaves because she's tired
>We keep fucking remaining chick, getting close to finishing
>Chick has to pee, leaves room
>Friend and I were naked
>He asks 'Can I suck your dick?'
>He sucks my dick for a minute or so
>She opens the door
>We fell on the floor
>Everybody walk the dinosaur
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lol. wanna get on all fours and back up on this?
No cos I'm not gay m8. Thanks for the offer though
I give all my friends brojobs when they need it. They're cool with it, because we're all no homo, so it's not weird or anything that'd break our brohood. Imagine how fucked up it would be if we were homo!
ayy i should pay attention to ids!

ok, what about this? i come to yours with weed and alcohol. you play xbox while i blow you and look into your eyes. i mean weed and booze is on me m8 ;)
>i'm kidding
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>>She opens the door
>>We fell on the floor
>>Everybody walk the dinosaur
I'm not in England though :/

Ugh, anyone in the ATX area want their dick sucked? pls respond
is that robbie amell?
Britbong here, I'll blow you in the unlikely event you live in/near Chatham.
>I'll blow you in the unlikely event you live in/near Chatham.
holy fuck, you live in Medway too?
Right there with you bro. I am still not attracted to men, but just the idea of doing stuff to a dick. Tbh I don't even know what to call myself.
completely the other side of london to you. drive though
I live at st Mary's Island...
which sites below birt?
Top kek
hory shet, near the Odeon?
wanna use Kik or whatever its called?

That's like, the same guy, guys.

He, like, totes posted as himself, and I am all up in arms about it.

I'm covering myself in sage, like a well made pork roast.

Please, someone fuck someone in the ass.
what sites you have open?
We should organize an orgy, to find out who the true fags are here on /b/....

no homo
Any Texas fags out there?

no homo of course
viagra and a priligy and i'll fuck you all
>i'd prefer to bottom though
Texas fag here in 512, no homo.
Damn, I'm in Gillingham, i'll suck someones cock for the lulz
Not really tbh, never been much of a picture sharer plus I prefer to be suckee thank sucker.
>If the balls don't touch, then no fuss
it's pissing me off that everyone's east of london, except for the actual no homo guy
ahh fair enough, same here

yes Im interested as well
What's the hottest one you have? Also, what does he look like (hair eyes height)
Que :|
U bi or homo?
Leaving to go to Austin for school at UT next week...

no homo tho
ayy lmao
As long as you didnt kiss its not gay.
OP may be no homo, but he's still a faggot.
You have a kik or anything no homo?
I can make one if you give me yours
>wearing tank top and teal colored board shorts
>not gay
I have bad news anon.
he's normal height, a little bit shorter than me, short brown hair with bright blue eyes (its really wierd I know) he has a really smooth face with fat cock-sucking lips, he's quite thin as well, his legs are lovely, like a thigh gap

he has a firm ass tho, why I put him in Yoga pants

hottest thing was probs when I fucked him in a stairwell
Should start a wank club
>>Be 21
>>Doing coke
>>It might be cool to fuck a tranny
>>Got fucked balls deep by a hung black tranny and let her come in my mouth
>>No homo
Did balls touch?
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This thread convinced me to put an ad up on CL.
>no homo ofc
Green text? Pic?
This thread is so gay it hurts my brain..
>on /b/
>reading threads as normal
>come across a no homo thread
>start reading about the closet faggots
>laugh a lot
>I have been reading about fags jerking eachother off, blowing eachother, and fucking eachother for 2 straight hours
>>I have been reading about fags jerking eachother off, blowing eachother, and fucking eachother for 2 straight hours
you thought no homo though so it's ok
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This just tells us how new you are.
Saying no homo makes everything straight.

balrogobama is the one I use for anon type activities. Shoot me a message.
Jay pls.
More dude!
no homo
rule #2 of hookup sites. everyone is either called "J", "Jay", "John" or "Paul". Pauls are the worst
>be 13ish
>with friend during sleepover
>somehow we're both naked (probably playing truth or dare)
>end up wrestling
>we're a sweaty mess
>be grinding on top of him
>our dicks are touching
>it's awkward at first but we don't mind
>suddenly my dick slips between his thighs
>tell him it feels just like I'm fucking a pussy and it'll make me cum
>he giggles and say to do it
>end up jizzing between his legs
>at the time we'd never heard of "no homo" so we didn't say it
>we also sucked each other off during other get togethers
>we're both straight btw
This is one of the least homo things ITT.
>drive to our usual spot, car park
>its like 11pm and raining, we walk out of the car to the stairwell of the car park, its dead empty
>push him against the wall, grabbing his ass and grinding on him whilst making out
>start biting his neck whilst squeezing his ass hard
>he begins to moan a little
>tells me he wants 'Daddy' to fuck him hard
>get my cock out, force him onto his knees
>he shoves my cock down his throat, gagging on it as I hold his head so he can't not gag
>after he's got me lubed with his spit I stand him up, turn him around
>peels down the yoga pants slowly, kiss his ass cheek
>lean on him, he's leaning on the wall now
>he's slightly bent over as I slowly fuck him
>slap his ass a bit as im thrusting
>cover his mouth with my hand to stop him from pretty much screaming
>iI can hear heavy rain, its really fitting
>fuck him for a few mins like this until I cum in him
Nice, care for a blow?
> no homo
nope thats my cock.
gullible cunt. lurk moar and lrn2filename
>fuck my ex-gf's best male friend in the ass
>publicly known and acknowledged
>call him a faggot in public
everything went better than expected
so you could only retrieve a picture of your dick from Facebook? RRRRRRRIIIIIIIIGHT. your newfag is showing
i use facebook so i can easily move pics between my ipad and my computer. jokes on you.
Nice... keep going.
dude, the filename man...
I'm pretty sure there's no statute of limitations to declare no homo...
i send pics to myself on facebook from my ipad so i can save them on my computer.
>adamantium hard
what a load of steaming shit
Yes and no. You like cock, not men. Kinda a weird thing but being gay is almost always about more then just the sex.
timestamp will prove all
also, i really want to see more... for science of course
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*puts Op in the oven*
>no antihomo at all
they wouldn't have fb filenames if you did. try harder
that underwear is giving me a chuckle
if a dude I'm about to fuck actually took off his pants to reveal this, I'd legit fall on the floor laughing
mfw everyone in this thread is actually gay and no one wants to admit it
I'm here, sorta, but kinda busy right now. If this thread is still up when I'm done, I'll moar.
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>keeps asking if I'm not at least bi
>I think of all the traps I've fapped to
>did not care
> saw filename
>was a joke
i don't really give a fuck what someone wants to put on me. i like to suck dick, i like to get fucked, when someone is cd/ts/tv/twinkish enough i like to fuck them too but i simply can't have a relationship with anyone but a women. i'm not afraid of the consequences of being "gay" or out - it would make no difference to my career - that's just the way i am
Really nice ones.
Will try to keep it up as long as it takes (no pun intended)

don't post
Are you legit retarded?
But no homo, right?
thats not gay you idiot
by your logic jacking it would be as bad and giving a handjob
o..o..of course anon. no homo
>so deep in the closet it hurts
they are all real similar

He has a gf and her house is HUGE, she and her friends (some of them were 10/10s) got wasted in their front room

My friend gave me the "I need a fuck" look
>went to the kitchen
>he follows me
>kisses me and puts his hand on my crotch area, rubbing it
>tells me he wants me to fuck him
So we went to the other end of the house (its like a mansion)
>throw him on his gfs bed, bend him over it
>fuck him dry, it hurts him but he told me to carry on anyways
>gotta cum
>gets on his knees and lets me finish in his mouth so no cum ends up anywhere

>go back downstairs
>flirt with a few of his gfs friends whilst getting looks from my friend
being Bi is awesome
> in a no homo thread
> post no homo joke

That's your logic, Fuck off
>there are people from my town in this thread
>terrified they'd recognise me as that quiet kid from school, fall about laughing and tell me to fuck off
>rock-hard at the thought they'd recognize me as that quiet kid, fall about laughing and proceed to destroy my throat and anus
>generally just wanna suck a dick
>no homo ofc
stale pasta nigger
anon, i replied to the wrong post at >>560805259
my bad
refresh shortcut
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yeah. Can't believe this is still going. Pants are still wet from prolonged hard-on.
it's not pasta. i've just posted it a few times in gay/ts threads. i actually did that
Why, if you're going to fuck a guy, you're already a huge, flaming faggot. What difference would the underwear make?
you guys retarded or something, or just wanted me to post another pic?
...I'd like some more pics.
>but still no homo
>driving with friend
>accidentally grab his leg instead of gearstick
>we both laugh and I unzip his pants
>park the car while I fondle his balls
>he is laughing because he knows it's just a joke
>start suckin his dick in this empty parking lot
>almost choke on it because I'm laughing so hard
>he is also laughing his ass off
>he starts yelling "BROJOB BROJOB CHOO CHOO"
>he cums and I swallow it all like some stupid faggot
>I kiss him and call him a faggot while laughing

I love playing pranks on my friends.
>dreams cum true
>be in thai bar
>chatting away with bar girls while watchin football
>get rape kissed by ladyboy barmaid
>i say in thai, " i like you, your pretty , but you have a banana sorry "
>ladyboy storms off
>i drink straight whisky all night to disinfect my mouth.
>go back to hotel room on my own
>brush teeth, and rinse well with proper mouth wash
everything about this dick and body does it for me. please tell me you are london based

also, moar
nah im in texas
>amazing dick
>pierced nipples
>other side of country
why do you do this to me god
I don't think jacking off is gay, not even the blowing yourself; would if I could ya know? Uh, the blowing the load in his mouth though, that's pretty gay.
> steers and queers
You're a stereotype anon.....
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Isn't this copypasta? I'm 99% sure I've heard this before.
im from Louisiana though... at least born there
What part of texas anon?
damn it
>why can't i be working in our austin, texas office
near beaumont
Gay. Come to Austin you queer fag cocksucker (no homo)
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hmm, that means homo sex = no homo? because you have to like all body parts not just peenie?!
>>tfw im not gay and cant relate to you guys
tiny dick lololololol
might actually move to austin at some point. its either that or san francisco

its just perspective. unless your cock is bigger.
Any faggots near or in Charlotte NC want some cock? No homo I like femboys,twinks 23 Here with uncut penis.
>Be 21, going to gym regularly for a month
>Gay bear offers sex
>n-no homo
>1 month later, still keep thinking about bear cock
>imagine it in my dreams
>it's just dreams so it's not like I have 100% control over them
>reassured in my straightness I take up his offer
>suck fat cock behind gym
>I didn't lick his balls so it's not gay
>"Want to come home with me?"
>Go home with bear, meet swole boyfriend
>Long story short, spend the next 6 months as a cockwhore for a gay couple
>doing everything to me, dp, cum from anal, spit roast, public sex, etc etc the works
>might not be so straight anymore
>go out (wingmanned by bear's macho boyfriend) to score some chicks
>totally score
>I may be a cockwhore but I still like girls
>no homo
i love an 8 inch+ dick as much as anyone but that gif ain't right

this causes hardness
>but it's from tumblr
>being Bi is awesome
indeed it is
yeah i have a trap tumblr as well. like with the facebook pics, i posted them to tumblr from my ipad and saved them on my computer
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If you're fem or a twinke faggot needing cock and near Charlotte nc Kik me echo6tech I am 23
>sort of friends with this guy in college
>hang out with him in his dorm
>he follows me around everywhere like a puppy
>we talk about sex stuff a lot
>one time we both have to go to the bathroom
>after school nobody around
>we had been talking about blowjobs earlier in the day
>incredibly awkward tension while we are in there at the same time alone
>he keeps eyeing me constantly
>my hearts beating really fast and the pressure is driving me crazy
>we go back to his dorm area and nobody is around
>we walk to a more secluded area and talk about stuff
>hes standing really close to me and is all fidgety
>theres a bunch of wasps flying around in this huge hive the size of a football
>fucking goddamn wasps everywhere
>I walk over to it like 10 feet away and tell him to come over to me and kept talking to him as if nothing is happening
>he hesitates but then comes over standing next to me scared looking but doing it anyways
>not sure why but huge boner
>start to get a lot of sexual tension again
>go back to his dorm and play video games until I have to leave later
>next day go back over to his dorm
>stupid roommate there
>this is when 2girls1cup was a thing
>make roommate watch it
>he is so disturbed that he has to leave the dorm
>buddy and I are playing video games I think phantasy star online
>he presses his leg against mine and I pretend not to notice or care
>we stop playing video games after awhile and watch some space documentary
>I notice he has a little plush dog toy and ask him about it
>he says its his teddy bear from when he was little
>sooo cute
>after his story he leans into me and rests his head on my shoulder
>out of nowhere I order him to Suck my cock
>he looks at me confused and shocked
>Tell him to do it
>he lays down on my lap and pulls my cock out
>puts it in his mouth and starts blowing me
>not bad could use more pressure
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> get hard all of a sudden, must be the booze and sexual atmosphere
>get hard

lol ok OP, keep telling yourself that,k?
only the newest of the new believe you at this point and that shame is on them. post a timestamped pic or shut the fuck up your fat, fantasist cunt
Fuckin nice
>no homo
>”I throught it warld feel good wif a difffint texchur”
>blowing me for awhile
>cant cum because fear of dick teeth
>tell him to stop and stand up
>he does like hes ready for military inspection
>fight back giggling
>grab his cock through his basketball shorts and fondle him a bit
>he gets hard and I pull his shorts down and pull him closer to me
>make our dicks touch and spit on my hand a bunch
>grab both of our dicks and put spit on them
>I let go and grab his hand and make it grasp both of our dicks and put my hand on top of his
>frot and jerk off our cocks together while i guide him
>he starts to get quiet and this really tense look on his face
>push him back on the bed and take out a condom
>put my clothes back in place and put some crap in the way of the dorm room door so it will jam
>put the condom on him and tell him he better hurry up if he doesnt want to be caught by his roommate coming back
>I really want to suck his cock but have bad feelings about being homo gay from ex gf
>also then remember he bit my dick
>hold him in my arms on his bed and start jerking him off
>he starts moaning a bunch quietly and staring up at me
>I get a huge sudden urge to kiss him and I lean in to kiss him on the lips
fuckable ass
Do it faggot.

>he immediately pulls back and smashes the back of his head on the wall
>all urge to suck his dick gone and I want to start crying
>hes still really horny and in a lot of pain
>im still cuddling him but kind of pissed off
>death grip his dick and start jacking him off way too fast and he starts spazzing out I think from pain
>I dont care
>pull condom halfways off real quick and spit on his dick
>he starts bucking into my hand
>remember hes really into wolf things like his teddy bear
>whisper into his ear "Cum for me my little puppy dog"
>he cums on the spot
>that feeling when it pulses in your hand
>his roomie shows up like 10 mins later as if nothing happened
>never see him again
>he got married to a girl and im mtf now
you must be bait cause i posted a timestamp ages ago
>posted a timestamp
no. no you didn't
>>on gay hookup site
lemme stop you right there`
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Thats not gay at all!
i apologise for being a massive faggot
>actual heaven that dun goofed
don't stop me now. i'm having such i a good time, i'm having a ball. usually two of them
>In Amsterdam
>Go to porn theatre
>straight porn (no homo)
>man comes sits next to me
>puts his hand on my leg
>I unbutton my trousers
>He puts hand down trousers and grabs cock
>Jerks me off
>I stare at straight porno so no homo
>He sucks me off and I cum everywhere

>Go back next day
>This time its a woman sits next to
>More or less same thing happens
>She stops sucking
>Grabs my arm and guide me to her crotch
>Feel she has a massive hard on
>She's a tranny
>I jerk her off and give it a suck
>After film finishes she invites me back to hers
>Unbelievable tits
>She takes me up the arse
>We both cum at same time

I stay in touch with her, my girlfriend knows nothing.
You guys make me feel as if I should go out and grab a drink or two in a bar tonight to get some str8-ish jock to my bed.
take nike's advice
Any of you guys in the Maryland-ish area by any chance?
> no homo
op re-claiming id, lost mine
i'm a girl btw
>Feel she has a massive hard on
laughed so hard i lost my boner
Yeah also seems pretty straight to me.
I mean the dude is letting you fuck his wife you coud at least do him a little favor

Captcha: >Profound Bonding
Nothing but faggots up in here...
>not being into buttsex with dudes
currently doing this now. idk how gay it is
ITT real faggots

No homo though
Still waiting for more.
Sorry, I'm still busy :(

If this thread hits limit, feel free to create a new thread :3
probably risking showing my face...

It's alright. Even if you fucked your own butt, it's still no homo.
everyone knows its only gay if the balls touch
Thread replies: 289
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