Hey /b/, I need some help
Well, basically, I need to get rid of my finger, don't ask me why...
How do I do effectively? I could just chop it off with a cleaver, but it HAS to look like an accident...
Also, the i don't give a shit about how much it hurts, it just has to look like an accident
run it through a bandsaw. 15000 nine-fingered shop teachers can't be wrong
this, find a friend with a workshop, say you were helping, cut it off, slightly injure other finger for more realism
Had a kid in woodshop class I took use a table saw as a substitute for a planner (very retarded) and he ended up chopping his pinky finger off and half of his ringer finger off.
knife, say you were cutting something, thats the easiest way. a bench saw or any saw for cutting wood, its very quick and cant not look like an accident. good luck and post a photo
Why do you need to cut your finger off? So you can scam Uncle Sam for disability? So you can get an ex arrested? So you can be a freak and join the circus? Tell us. We can come up with a perfect way to do this.
OP god damn it, why?
also band saw/electric saw/some other high speed moving blade, should hurt least and make cleanest cut, try local anesthetic or getting really drunk/high first and have a friend help you make sure you don't injure yourself beyond the target removal
The other thing is, do you want to make sure they don't re-attach it at the hospital? If not, you're going to have to do something stupid to it so they can't -- ie, put it in a baggie of salt or rubbing alcohol instead of on ice, and tell them you thought that's what you were supposed to do in the shock of it all.
Basically, you want to fuck it up so they can't easily and cleanly re attach it. Or, if it's just the cutting that's important, by all means put it on ice.
I guess you're right.
Okay then, there is no way you're gonna trust me this one, but since you asked, sure
So, do you know "Hello Kitty" by Avril Lavigne? I used to fucking hate it, but as I played it over and over, I started to like the chorus.
>Come come kitty kitty you're so pretty pretty...
So, I got fucking hooked up to the fucking song, I had to listen to it over and over again, and then I got really pissed off at myself, and promised that if I play the song one more time, my finger goes away. I didn't listen to it yet, but I can't resist the urge, so I already accepted my fate.
I know, I'm the biggest cock sucker ever, and I feel ashamed of myself, but it's like when you're addicted to cigarettes and you just need to smoke
I think this is the way to go unless you have a knife but I still think that won't look genuine enough. OP do you have that diease or disorder where you feel like a certain body part doesn't belong?
you can't easily reattach a finger
fuck you can't even type well without a finger
pc can be replaced, but costs time and money
sounds like you need a therapist though to reevaluate your priorities
You better do it now. I demand live stream of you cutting your finger off with a knife. Just claim you tried to cut something hard, like.. idk, a coconut, and since you're a fucking retard you tried to do it with a regular knife and it slipped and you cut your finger off.
I know dat feel.
I have the "Links 2, 3, 4" from Rammstein since 12years in my head ...
this has to be the most cringe-inducing song I've heard in my entire life
worse than that shitty gangnam style parody https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTin-eTnkOM
how the fuck anyone could play this more than once is baffling
Op, cool your shit. There is no reason or benefit to removing your finger. you're better off getting a taser and shocking yourself every time you listen to it. That finger could safe your life some day. You could need it for typing or playing the piano.
Imagine never getting a full grip again. Plus there could be ghost pain or residual nerve damage. It's not worth it.
this is why i /b/
Wake up, got a secret
Pinky swear that you're gonna keep it
I've got something you need to see"
Im fucking on to you OP.
I couldn't even make it through the whole thing once. I felt my balls trying to shoot back up into my body so they could choke me to death rather than listen to it any longer.
A good taser hurts like hell. Shock training is a good way to force yourself to learn to dislike things. Really you shouldn't be ashamed though.
The Brain itself decides it likes certain songs even if the owner doesn't. (earworms) but eventually gets bored or distracted and stops replaying the tune in your head. Some have luck playing other repetitive songs. Just choose one you like
>mfw next week will be on liveleak a video of some kid bleeding to death because of an arm stuck in the lawnmowner
just deal with it pussy. i quit heroin cold turkey. and you never quit heroin. talking about it right now really makes me want some fucking heroin. but i won't get it. you know why? because i understand that pleasure is meaningless, especially the kind that chains you to fucking shit that ruins your life.
don't cut off your finger you stupid fuck.
well yeah but thats the whole point. Don't you want to do what you set out to do instead of proving your a faggot and pussying out with a taser all the while living forever on the internet and becoming a legend? I say cut the finger off
You. Be a legend. Nao!
Cmon OP you know you want to. You came here wanting to find a good way to cut off your finger and be the badass that cut off your own appendage but you are leaving the pussy that decided shocking yourself would be better
pull yourself through a tear in the space-time continuum, but leave a bit of your finger sticking out as it closes
should be painless
I'll probably stick to being a faggot, I won't cut it right now, but I may in the future. If that happens, I will be sure to at least live stream it. I won't become a legend, but that's ok, I didn't come here to become one
>be a legend
>be a hero
The choice is in your hands.
it all makes sense now
also OP is a retard Leonardo Davinci invented hidden blades where you don't need to cut your finger off. they probably added that int the game because of autists like you cutting their fingers off