Glad you said that, I was gonna stop.
and it`s true. So many years, no one ever said it to me.
call me a faggot I don't give a shit.
The sunset this evening was beautiful. Colored by pollution and the sun's golden light. It came and went in the blink of an eye, and I was alone. I think all I want is for someone to share the sunset with. In quiet serenity we would watch the colors of the ending of day, they would bloom slowly like flowers under our noses, moving too slowly to capture, and too quickly to catch. Life moving above us, slowly rolling by. Like a wave the sky breaks and slowly rolls back, and your head is rested on my shoulder and I can feel your heart beating in syncopated perfection with mine. In this moment nothing matters, we simply exist. Together in this strange state of being, lost in splendor. oh the beauty of it all, the beauty of now, and the beauty of ourselves. It came and went in the blink of an eye, but it was worth a thousand years.
I am accustomed to watching all of my sunsets alone, day after day. And though they are beautiful, they are cold and fleeting, and they give way to night, which I spend curled into myself. To suffer the fearsome darkness of a frail creature left to its own devices, a stray dog in the big city, I don't sleep much. The days bleed into each other, congealing into weeks and months and years. I think all that I want is for someone to share the sunset with, that is the short-hand definition of my loneliness. My sunsets are beautiful, but they aren't worth remembering. Nothing is worth remembering when you're all alone, and nothing is eternal when you are constantly in your own mind. All that exists is a blizzard of thoughts and worries. To suffer the fearsome darkness of a frail creature left to its own devices, a stray dog in the big city, I don't sleep much.
>Nothing is worth remembering when you're all alone, and nothing is eternal when you are constantly in your own mind. All that exists is a blizzard of thoughts and worries. To suffer the fearsome darkness of a frail creature left to its own devices, a stray dog in the big city, I don't sleep much.
I agree with this so much.
My birthday is coming up /b/
heres my contribution guys
>be me, having sex with gf last night
>its amazing, i love her and the emotional connection makes it better than anything else
>earlier that night, went out with a bunch of friends (one we will call 'J')
>J was giving us a lift to all the places, and she was our ride back so we stuck with her talking alot of the night
>Anyway later on we get, home start banging like bunnies
>i can feel that sweet feeling coming on
>finish and start making out with her on top
>ask her to get off so i can take the condom off
>accidently say 'J can you get off me'
>she stops, looks at me wide eyed
>i didnt even realise what i said
>she tells me to get out of the room
>starts crying at me to leave
I sat outside the door for a good hour, fuck, i even started crying for some reason. I dont know why i said J's name, im not attracted to her, i think she is repulsive and i have no fucking desire to ever have sex with her
so thats my story guys, feel free to voice your 2 cents or whatever
momentarily confused. basically you said the wrong name in bed? if so, thats sucks. could happen to anyone.
flashbacks to putting down my collie Ginger last year. 8/10 lip trembled, tears welled up
Happy Birthday Anon. Keep on living Anons. One day... everything will change.
>tfw it was my birthday last week
>tfw the only text I received was an automated one from Bank of America
Can't be satisfied with my situation, even when i know full well that i have it better than a lot.
I cant help to feel angry, all the time, never ending.
Not rage anger, but subtle anger that seeps out of my pores.
An hero is on my mind a lot, just cant come up with a valid reason.
Is this all life is?
Be raised in an educational institution, get a job, have kids, die?
Maybe that's your mind telling you to keep going.
Fuck it dude, take chances. Take a holiday. Talk to that chick you like.
If you're already considering suicide, what've you got to lose?
The one person i really want to talk to, told me one day, that she was glad she didnt have to worry about me..
she already was too stressed as it was.
I came across this wallpaper some time ago. Makes me feel a feel.
Thats a big problem, i dont even have to chase after, to long for, and be legit upset about.
I am idle.
Fuck it, ima go get drunk off my ass.
pic very related.
Be back, hopefully.
It doesn't matter that people have it worse than you.
You have it how you have it and that's important, it's not relative to anything.
Don't beat yourself up for the crime of having emotions anon, you're allowed to
no. my Golden is 12 and now she doesn't want to come in our house anymore. she's just lying there and looks sadly. maybe she keeps distance, because she knows that she's about to die. I'm taking her to the vet but what can I say? it may be an illness but if not, being old can't be cured. she's been with me since I was 8, I can't imagine my evening without her snoring next to the couch.
I almost cried at the number of beer cans in my room when i was cleaning up
I was in that spot for a long time.
I started building model planes. (That shit's hard, those pieces are fucking tiny. I butchered them to the point where I was mashing half the pieces.)
It's nice to be creating something for once.
Then step it up. Talking to strangers, (commenting on the weather, retarded shit like that.) it helps so much. I didn't realise how reclusive I was being until I actually stopped.
It gets better. Trust me :)
happy birthday, if you were near me i would buy ya a drink
song and pic relate
>be 5 years ago
>loved my mom
>Mom gets diagnosed with cancer
>she recovers 3 months
>Years pass i start hitting puberty
>dont give a shit about anything
>Mom gets diagnosed with cancer once again
>didnt give a shit, only cared about video games
>i was very mean to her, and i regret every single word i said to her.
>i made her cry several times
>one day my brother asks me to come visit her at the hospital
>i say yes, and when i finally end up being there im, i was really bored and wanted to go home
>mom asked if anything was wrong
>i said no, i just really wanted to play video games
>next day brother asks me if i want to visit her again
>Says no and continues playing this shit game i was playing
>next day my moms status is critical
>stay home from school cause of the video games ofc
>Told to wait for my aunt to pick me up
>aunt arrives and tells me, mom is really sick
>Drive to the hospital
>see mom, all drugged out on antibiotics
>doesnt remember me, or say a word to me
>i couldnt say a word to her even though i wanted to really badly
>i stared at her for 8 hours straight.
>she dies and i start crying out loud
>starts crying everytime i think about it
>about to turn into an autist cause of the thoughts
>hate my self even more for every time i think about what i have done to her & letting her through
I always think about killing myself, I won't though because I'm pretty sure my family still cares about me. I just pray that I get cancer someday because I'm tired of suffering, tired of being lonely and to depressed about doing anything about it.
> I just pray that I get cancer someday
You & me both, /b/ro
One in the same here.
There's a harsh difference between emotional and physical pain.
My sister had cancer and she died a painful death,so don't go wishin such stupid things upon yourself,just remeber you have an effect on more than just yourself,think about your family fgt
Was going to spend Halloween with boyfriend. First boyfriend in a really really long time. Actually liked him a lot. Tried to make him happy. He recently broke up with me over Facebook, defriended me, and is ignoring me. I don't even know what I did wrong. Spending Halloween in bed on /b/. So sad.
Am i the only one that cant stop thinking about how Bam Magera is feeling after Ryan dunns dead? Imagine having a friend for over 15 years, suddenly just to die in a car crash while fooling around?
>"i have never lost anyone i cared about"
>"he was my best friend"
this, my father died of lung cancer last year. seeing someone suffer from that shit for over a year is brutal, you dont want to die from cancer or wish it on your worst enemy
so make it better, fuck youre probably healthy. theres kids dying of cancer that would do anything to be in your position and youre here whining about being depressed. you can and have the power to make your life better, someone with terminal illness cannot
Happy Birthday man. I'm having a drink right now just for you. You're not alone, and we all love you.
start yourself over. for her, and for you. get a new hobby, or job, or friend.
That's if most of my family thinks about me. To them I'm just a disappointment, I have nothing going for me later in life. I lost all my friends, I only at vidya just so I can hear a friendly voice every once in a while. My 2 brothers were the only things close to me but they were stationed elsewhere due to being in the navy. I have nothing now.
>be me today
> Black guy comes up to me asks for 50 cents
> looking for change in pocket
> sister gives him 2$
> i find 50 cents in my pockets
> Ask my sister immediately how much she gave to him
> says 2$
> I get mad give him 50 cents and asks him to return 2$
> See the sad look on his face
> But still take the 2$ back and give him 50 cents
> sister tells me later "you took away his happiness"
> I feel bad as fuck
> I wonder if Jesus will ever forgive me for my sins
Bro, you're not a pussy. Everyone needs to fall apart every once in a while. Bottling it up for too long could destroy you. That's what's happening to me. Worst part is, I finally got to a point where I don't want to die, and now I'm legitimately terrified that I'm going to.
No problem man, and here's to many more.
Yeah. same here. Such a beautiful story. The guy who wrote the original book wrote it as a gift to his kids to help them recover after their Mother passed away.
I'm sure your brothers would want you to stay strong and find new things to live for, just like your /b/rothers all want you to.
This always makes me cry because I know it is my future. My girlfriend left me two days ago saying she needed a break from me. I am on window 20 of this picture. Except unlike the picture I will never be able to find anyone else. I love her too much.
Isn't love forever? I have never stopped loving her from the day I met her, and yet she says that she doesn't love me anymore. She is always just mad at me. Does she love me deep down, but just won't admit it because she is mad?
I try so hard to be everything she wants in a man but I guess I can't. What is wrong with me? Why am I so pathetic that I try to force my way into her life for the brief scraps of affection she sometimes appears to give me? I go hours or dayz in sadness just to see her brief smile. I am there for her when she needs me but she isn't there for me.
Am I wrong? Am I actually a piece of shit that does everything wrong? I try to be perfect for her. I buy her flowers weekly, cook every meal, do dishes, work full time, take care of her son who is 2 and not mine.
Why am I not good enough? Don't I deserve love? Haven't I earned affection? I just want her to enjoy being around me like I do her.
I hate myself. I wish I was dead.
Once some gypsy girl came to me on the street and asked me if I have some cash. I sayed no. The moment she looked me into eyes I was sure she is making some black magic on my white ass. That was scary.
if homeless/grubby people want money, just ask them if theyre hungry. i wont give them money out of risk theyll blow it on liquor but nearly every single one of them has said yes to food and i buy them a pizza or whatever. years ago i bought a guy Subway because he missed his meal at a shelter, afterwards the guy started crying and shook my hand. ive still never forgotten that day years later
we're here with you /b/ro
also bumping with this one
it's actually not true
some stars we see on the sky are dead, the big distant ones
but the close ones and planet will be there for billions to come
and usually wishing comes with 'falling star' which is a meteorite which happens in real time in our atmosphere
Fuck it. It's been about 2 months but it's still haunting me. I dream about it every night. I just need to tell someone. Here's my story.
> Be me 15
> Be 2002
> Be beta as fuck
> Fat (351lbs 150 kg)
> I was always alone, the only friend I had was my friend Valerie, or V for short.
> I grew up with V always defending her since she was never that tall.
> V was always delicate.
> We were always together, inseparable.
> High School came and I started to man up
> Found a job
> Lost my excess weight got gainz
> Ever since I lost all that weight girls were all over me.
> In highschool I'd say I had about 40 girlfriends in 3 years.
> I never felt really attracted towards them. They were the slutty type of girls
> Be Halloween, just like this.
> Party at some popular's kid house
> V's coming with me she says.
> At the time we were seniors in High School.
> We'd grown apart, since she had moved away from our neighborhood.
> We get to the party
> Open the door walk the dinosaur (imagine?)
> We get to the party, and I immediately leave her alone.
> Like always I had girls around me.
> I was 18, 6'1 and weighed 220 lbs of muscle
> I look over and see V talking to some dude
> I get jealous and start making out with some chick just to spite V
> V leads the guy to a bedroom
> To this day I have no idea what they did.
> I left, pissed at the world.
> I was alone that night.
> That night I sat on a cliff that over-looked the city.
> I remember me thinking
> Am I in love with V?
> Why do I like V?
> V was never that "hot" girl, she was mostly the cute bff you never think about.
> She was like my hoodie always around me
> I would never fuck my hoodie.
> FF 2 years
> 2008, freshmen in Uni
> Everyone from high school went there
> It was the closest, in fact the only good Uni worth going to.
> V was there two.
> Christmas 2008, I remember that day all two well.
> The Uni had a huge Christmas party
> I had decided to stay in my dorm, watching Netflix
That made me break down in tears
Fuck feel threads
>mfw reading this
>hs is over
>we had plans for the week
>they didn't call
>at home playing ssb and browsing 4chan
>realise never really had friends
inb4 it's hs get over it
i thought they were my friends i don't even know why i don't have any I'm not even a basement dweller or anything.
Maybe it's because i don't try. The things i don't do are the ones that haunt me at night.
People would cry about this because they don't understand that life has no purpose (similar to the person who wrote the comment)
Yeah, it is pretty well known, I just didn't have it saved and was regretting it.
I just heard there is a party from some guy at work girl i like is going
Wasnt invited other friend thats going said i she can ask for me lied and said i have another party
Freinds doing their own thing
Lonley as fuck with no poewr due to some truck crashing to a pole
It helps telling this to some one
Pic is my custome i took to work and hoped to take to party
It sucks to be an autist dude, I wish I could feel love, but I'm sad enough as it is so I'm not sure if i want to deal with the feels.
How can life not have a purpose, We were put on earth with these people we communicate with for a reason. imagine if someone that cared about you were left alone cause you had given up on life, how would he be able to continue if he didnt have this so called friend of his. Imagine if you had to leave him alone just because you couldnt take the pressure, which bassicly means youre letting out your worries go on to him. Life is all about getting through it, Death is cheating. Get over whatever youre worrying about and get over it with someone you know, let those people that care about you help you.
> I don't know why I skipped the party but I did.
> All of a sudden hear a know on my door.
> It's V
> She sobbing, snot everywhere, makeup running, not a good sight.
> She tells me her parents died.
> Her parents, on the way to visit her brother, lost control of the car and died.
> She said she had no one to talk to and my room mate told her I was in my room.
> That night we spent it crying.
> We fell asleep in bed together.
> Come Christmas morning.
> We just laid in bed all day, she occasionally broke out in sobs.
> I don't really remember what we did that day.
> I think we just went to get some coffee.
> 3 days later we have to go to the morgue to fill out some paperwork.
> I have to basically drag her into it.
> Coroner (or whatever the morgue doctor is) asks us if we wanted to see the bodies.
> The bodies were alright, it was mostly the shock that killed them.
> I remember their faces /b/
> Those people raised me just like my parents.
> They looked so peaceful, at rest, drained of color.
> It still brings tears to my eyes.
> We get over it.
> It's hard.
> V was christian so she believed they were in a better place.
> From that day on, me and V stayed together alot.
> She slept over in my dorm all the time.
> We actually started dating.
> I remember this one date
> I think it was 2010
> We went to Six Flags and she got lost
> I found her crying at the entrance like a little baby.
> Never had I been more in love a woman in my life.
> Anyways, it's Halloween 2009, Sophomore year of Uni.
> The Uni is constant with it's parties.
> V wants to stay in, she was never too good at parties.
> Whatever, I was ok with it.
Bear with me this was a couple of years ago so my memory's not that good.
> We just sat on my couch and watched anime
> All of a sudden she starts opening up to me
> She tells me she liked me ever since we were little kids.
> It's killing me.
Pic related, last February at my sister's wedding.
Im sorry for that /b/
This is exactly what i cant or wont, turn into myself.
i dont want to be all by myself, i want to keep contact with those that still care about me the slightest
nigger are you really complaining about tumblr to us? I think you're too caught up in the 'tumblr wars' and too new to recognize what a baww/feels is before the source of content. gtfo newfag, and it youre not, quit being a newfag loser.
No, you dont HAVE to do those things, you can...
>fight a bear
>prank call the president
>fuck a duck
>order a 3 cheese pizza and throw it on a hobos face
>write intimate erotic love letters to members of ISIS
>Call the police and ask if they have battletoads
Packing up my shit on the last day in my house. Lost my job and am back in the same cycle I've been in since 18. All of my friends hate me, everything I say is used against me, nobody understands anything I've tried to say for years, could possibly be disowned by my family. I'm an utter failure, a faggot, and a complete coward. I hate the sounds I make and the way I look and the way I think. I really just want to be put out of my misery
Last part I think.
>It dawns on me how much of an asshole I was to her.
> To her I was prince Charming always protecting her.
> Fast Forward to 2012
> Me and V were still going strong.
> Stronger then ever really.
Im going to make this short
> In 2013 I proposed to her.
> We were the happiest couple.
> All of our friends talked about us.
> I got a good paying job as a Manager at Staples
> It's late 2013
> Christmas again.
> This time it's a fun one.
> We drink with our friends, laugh and dance.
> I eventually get home with her.
> Me and V had sex.
> Luckily she was pregnant.
> That day was the luckiest moment of my fucking life /b/
> Fast forward to September 2014.
> September 30 my baby is being born.
> I was at the hospital with Valerie
> Maria, my daughter is born.
> my wife is crying she won't wont stop bleeding b
> I start yelling at the doctors to help her
> the doctors push me out of the room.Im fucking shaking
> doctors are yelling and yelling
> something about internal hemorrhage
> she she died
> too much blood loss
> my Valerie is gone
> my fucking wife is gone
> i sturgeled for so fuking long and she died /b/
Im sorry im shaking as a I write this
October 10th was the funeral
I'm sitting here with Maria next to me in her crib.
she's only a month old but she looks so much like her mom /b/ she looks so much like her fucking mom. oh my fucking god I miss her so damn much
Maria's the only reason I haven't killed myslef. I'm gonna do all I can to raise this child right.
I just needed to let out these emotions.
Sorry if I seem stupid I'm a man men shouldn't cry. Pic related, it's my baby
I love her. I love you /b/ and I love you Valerie.
We weren't 'put on earth', or at least I don't believe in a religion or anything that says so. It is just one way to look at it I suppose, but the way I see it, we are just part of the universe, made of matter in such a way that we want to reproduce. There isn't 'right' or 'wrong', no 'good' or 'bad', there just is. Of course, in the real world I don't act on this idea.
All in all, that comment was just so far from a feel to me that I wanted to say something about it.
calm down, faggots
Happy birthday anon! I will play the happy birthday song on my violin for you! :)