Ok fuckers, lets play a game...
You have to post a life hack/tip that you've learnt personally along the way, that will be beneficial to someone else reading.
Keep it simple, no dl;dr
Be creative too, cunts. kgo
> If you feel suicidal, drink 2 liters of warm water.
You can laugh all you want, but I've been at this /r9k/ shit for 13 years, and that's the most consistently effective help.
> If you feel anxious, smoke weed.
hurr durr, I don't want to do drugs. Sure. Took a couple of puffs, haven't felt depressed or suicidal for 3 days. Didn't even feel "high" at all - just "not shitty".
> Bad breath? Eat 1 teaspoon of coco butter before bedtime.
Literally the best thing ever.
> Feeling bored and unfulfilled?
1. Goto liquor store.
2. Buy whiskey.
3. Consume half a glass of said whiskey.
4. Goto fancy bakery shop.
5. Purchase 10 cookies.
6. Walk around, hand out cookies.
7. Strike up random conversations.
>Anybody who tells you that three monitors is a waste of money doesn't have three monitors.
>Buy a nice motorbike and ride it daily - bitches fucking love motorbikes, but for heaven's sake, don't sell your car to do it.
>Take care of your tattoos/piercings properly and get them done by professionals.
>Measure twice, cut once.
>Posters are not art.
>Art from the supermarket/mall is not art either.
>Faux leather is never worth it.
>Have sex with as many people as you can, but always use protection. Seriously.
>It's okay to like popular songs.
>>Buy a nice motorbike and ride it daily - bitches fucking love motorbikes, but for heaven's sake, don't sell your car to do it.
fucking this, I was a beta faggot until I was 21 and bought a Bike. Got pussy for the first time within a month of buying my bike and once I lost my V card I had confidence which makes bitches wet
If someone calls you an ambulance and you are near transport (home or friends nearby)
Get them to patch you up, then REFUSE to be taken to a hospital. They can't bill you for the ambulance if you don't ride with them.
If you take yourself to a hospital under your own steam after that you are golden.
Easy way to float in water with zero effort is to just swallow air into your stomach. shit just makes you insanely buoyant.
You can also use this to stay under water longer by using normal breath holding, then when you need more release the air from lungs, burp but keep it in mouth, and breath it in.
Its weird to do at first but easier with practice. can easily buy you another 20-30 seconds under water with enough practice, though its difficult to stay under with the added buoyancy.
>smoke plenty of dank kush erryday and praise lordy 420 jesus
>Never pretend to like something if you don't. (whiskey, beer, music, sports, etc.)
>Get into a routine, but don't hesitate to break it.
>For the love of all that is holy, don't shave the side of your head.
>Keep your house clean and tidy.
>Girls like bad boys, but women like gentlemen.
>There is a difference between being confident and being arrogant.
>Spirituality has nothing to do with spirits, the supernatural, religion or anybody other than yourself and is something to be sought.
>Never invite drug addicts into your home.
That's enough for now, I have to go have a shower, then take my R1 downtown to get laid.
rotten eggs float- fresh eggs don't
if it seems like the deal of the century...it's a scam
never buy stocks/shares/cattle/horses in november, december,june or july.
if you find someone you love and who loves you, hold onto them for as long as you can.
If you're studying and need quick caffeine to stay awake, soak a teabag in water for a few seconds (until it's soaked through), then stuff it as far into your ass as you can. I've stayed up for days at a time doing this.
The hilarious part is that I'm not even trolling.
To get the best pleasure. Put poo on ur face.
i'm ok with the weed stuff but remind that not everyone is equal in term of drug use and reaction, weed dont relax everyone.
>if someone try to sell you an "oil painting" that he just made in the street it's a fake oil take days to dry it's acrylic and made in series
Two for acne.
I'm 25 and had terrible acne since middle school. I'll be honest, I had a fucked up diet of junk food and fast food. Also soda was my water.
So one day about six months ago I was cleaning my bathroom when I happened upon a nailbrush. The kind used to clean under your fingernails and such. Set it in my shower and forgot about it. Time went forward, acne was still bad, and it dawned on me.
I started lathering up the nailbrush and pulling it down my face like you're shaving a beard. The bristles are firm and hard enough to pop zits, while the very tips are usually sharp and thin enough to really push the antibacterial soap deep into your pores. Be sure to clean your face prior and after you do this, and make sure you clean the brush afterwards too. You'll probably end up with puss and blood on it.
It didn't solve 100% of it though. So last month I decided to try some Rogaine for my hairloss. Yes, I've changed my diet. I eat rice+chicken+veggies on a daily basis and drink mostly water or orange juice. Still had some acne though.
While it's to soon to see the effects of the Rogaine, I did begin to apply it to my face and it seems to also fight acne pretty well.
>In short: Nailbrush + antibracterial soap on face; Use like a razor and apply gentle force
>Rogaine like aftershave to reduce acids & oils on face
>Give it a week of steady use and you'll be zit-free
>drinkin out of a shampoo bottle is totally normal
lel, my grandma has keyboard exactly like that and she asked me to clean it a week ago.
every other woman you'll meet is as annoying and worthless as your ex, so be glad you dumped her and just enjoy the benefits of being single
>nobody trying to pry your friends away
Also (if in US) never associate yourself with somebody who openly admits they're a liberal. You will see that they are literally the worst kind of people that an exist. Conservatives are cool, and libertarians are better, and people who don't openly talk about politics are the best.
I discovered this one
i dont know if someone else knows it or its actually on Internet.
When I was a Kid and had nightmares of scary movies, characters or whatever, I "discovered" how not to get them.
I remember watching scary movies like chuky or scream and having nightmares that same night or nights before and thinking as soon as I woke up. And remembered
that of what I actually had paid so little attention the day before it was of what I had nightmares.
So, in conclusion, if you see scary shit or whatever and dont want to have nightmares about it, just think of it frequently during the day,
Maybe its a useless lifehack but it works, and its really useful when you are a kid.
And when you have nightmares remember how you saw the same thing the day before and you´ll notice that you paid so little or none attention to it.
I just realized that these last weeks I havent actually had any dreams.
I tried all of those and nothing worked.
Soaps, pills, creams, ointments... none of it worked. It'd clear it up for about a week, and it'd come right back.
This has been the only consistant thing so far for me.
I'm sure there's an up and down motion involved as well.
Only need to use antibacterial soap if you get bacteria on your face. One of the most common ways bacteria can get on your face is touching your face, or not brushing regularly enough. By not brushing regularly enough the bacteria in the mouth becomes strong enough to cause ache if transferred to the outside (licking lips etc).
Dont do this, it will damage your skin.
Use Avene soap for face (3/4 times a day)
White Dove for body
If your acne is persistant and had been trying to eliminate it for a couple of months use Trevissage this is the "last resource" for not a so severe acne, take it everday after the biggest meal for 3/4 months, and check the secondary effects and be precatious, it can fuck your liver.
but it will make magic to your body, eliminate any acne anywhere and clean your face.
Sensitive skin, my face gets sunburns everytime.
Nose and under the eyes get all red if I stand in the burning sun for about half an hour or less.
and this Soap is the best so far, doesnt dry my skin as the other ones and feels fresh.
>too late for the rest of us
>rest of us
>implying you aren't a newfag
Worship Satan and figure out how to please him in order to be successful in Hollywood. Every celebrity, even the Z listers, are Satanists who summon demons and sacrifice things.
these are all fucking awesome, pic related its mine, you are whalecum /b/ros
If you want to remember something, such as something you need to take with you for the next day or later, put it by your car keys, shoes, etc, stuff you NEED to leave with. This way, you can never forget something important.
people don't give two shits about you, your interests, your feelings or your opinions. you are utterly worthless and just another face in the crowd to just about every single human being in the world. stop caring and you won't be socially awkward anymore.
Can't find your apple recharger? Easy. Whack your phone in the microwave for quick charge.
Drink. More. Water.
Don't scrub your face with a brush like that, it'll lead to infections at best or possibly to scarring. You want gentle exfoliants for your face, something with a nice fine grain. Even then they are for once a day at most.
Keeping your hands clean and away from your face will help also. Just try not to touch your face.
Reducing the amount of sugar you eat and drink will go a long way towards reducing your outbreaks also.
I find, personally, that dabbing a little bit of tea tree oil on the occasional pimple I still sometimes get in the morning or at night will help minimise the redness and help it heal down.
Number one tip though, drink that motherfucking water! Get at least a litre a day of good old H2O up in you. You'll piss every 5 minutes the first few days if you aren't used to it, but that'll settle down. Then kick it up even further, go for 2 litres. It'll really help reduce the severity of acne, but improves general health across the board more than any other factor.
Get welfare and then build a business without the government knowing. Life support for your starting company. If your government supports this, then let them know of course.
Dish detergent and other cheaper cleaners have the same sterilizing power as the more expensive Lysol(I've seen this firsthand in a food microbiology lab). Save yourself some goddamn money when cleaning your house.
Very salinated water also probably has the same sterilizing power as Listerine(much more expensive), minus the fresher breath taste. Although with a good tongue scrub followed by some salt water, you could probably kill a shit load of bad breath causing bacteria anyway
When I buy shit that's embarrassing like nerf swords, adventure time DVDs, and Lego video games I buy a 99¢ birthday card with it. It takes off pressure of looking like a weirdo
If you're having trouble talking to girls, go crazy and do random shit. Ask anybody and everybody out. Don't fixate on one girl- if she shoots you down, fine. Move on to another one.
Also, don't be afraid to straight up ask a girl to fuck. When I was an idiot teenager I was deathly afraid of letting girls know I liked them because hey, they would probably laugh at me and avoid me the same way Jessica did. The secret is fuck Jessica, she's a bitch, and ask out whoever you want.
God, I wish I had known about that years ago.
while speeding, stay in the right lane as much as possible. cops are less likely to care about you speeding, either because they're more used to seeing people speeding while in the left lane where they don't notice you doing it in the right lane, or because they let it slide because they hate left lane hogs that speed to bother someone speeding while keeping right as much as possible
Always keep a cool head. Don't stress over anything. Running late for work? Walk/drive at a steady pase. Better to get their alive than not get there at all.
late for school? Relax, you're fine. Just ask your professor/teacher if you missed anything.
don't stress over anything. Didn't study? No big deal, read the questions very carefully. Do your best.
Drug test at work? You'll find another job, or you'll get lucky and come up clean.
small weights at the bottom of the shower curtain will prevent it from going inwards towards your body due to the hot/cold air difference
Never get to attached to the girl you're dating. Consider her a girl with benefits. Sex, cuddling, w.e. Keep a bit of distance. Enough so you're comfortable, but not alot to the point where she starts questioning you.
Softens, or completely eradicates the break up feeling in case it goes sour.
explain why drinking a lot of warm water would help you, please
if you're driving on the interstate at a steady pace, like a few mphs over the limit, and another driver overtakes you while going 80mph or more, don't match your speed with them. all it does is piss people off, first they're worried about spotting a cop, if you're now playing rabbit speeding behind them, now they have to worry about what some idiot they overtook a few minutes ago is trying to accomplish. like what the fuck, i just passed you, now you're on my ass? are you going to pass me because you're butthurt about being overtaken? etc. it just pisses people off. if you're going to speed, then have the balls to do it on your own. otherwise you're a fucking bitch ass fucking pussy if you speed up and follow someone else's speed after they passed you
New job? Make as many friends as possible. Try to get a couple of good/close friends. Even better if they the same schedule as you. Time will go so much faster when you have people to talk to.
meanwhile in reality people would use warm water on the spoon instead
While it is a fake, I propose we make some hashtags and take to twitter with #bsnewkiller which also looks like b.s. new killer. If moot is really selling this site to gawker and wants more traffic (big if honestly) then let's give him traffic. Bring to light all the perverse shit that goes on here and all the old murders that were discussed here first. Then show pics and stamp of this one. Maybe make up some of our own with stamps too. If the site has that awful of a rep maybe it's worth will plummet.
I know it already had a bad rep but some think of it as cute infamy. Bring up modern events, like the guy that posted the naked chick. Fabricate some more as well with some pics.
A little sad to say this because of all the furfags, ponyfags, trapfags, etc..
Never be ashamed of what your hobbies are. Be proud, but don't shove it in peoples faces. It's so much more respectable when you keep it to yourself, or in between friends who share the same interest.
If a girl asks you what you're into, and you know your thing is a little out there, ex furfags, just say weird shit. Most girls will want to know, so play it off as a joke.
if people that are into weird shit actually KNEW their hobbies were "weird shit" we wouldn't have a problem in the first place
Do your best at being honest. If someone asks you what you did, and it was something embarrassing, refuse to tell them. Don't lie. Messed up at work? Accept the consequences, and learn from it. Only fools repeat mistakes.
If you get caught in a lie, chances are consequences will be worth, and your work appearance will not look so good. Whereas the truth will make you look like a responsible person.
You never have to do anything you're uncomfortable with. Know your limits. If you go out drinking, don't be stupid about it, think ahead. How am I going to get home? Which route? Don't drink to the point where you're drunk off your ass. If you drove, don't drink at all. If friends pressure you, tell them to fuck off. You might be the wet blanket, but chances are you'll be the only one alive after 40 years.
it's 80% fake stuff, not worth your while really
dedicate part of your monthly income to prostitutes. at least one fuck per month tricks your body into believing that you are fulfilling your biological task and makes you a little happier. just a little.
Some operating systems, like win XP can still connect to networks without knowing the password and because of that you can connect and then try to log into the router, and if people who manage the net are retards the pass will probably be admin//admin
Be friendly with people, even if they're dicks to you. But don't be afraid to be a complete Asshole to people who deserve it.
People who deserve it = people who are angry at you and get physical
People who don't deserve it = people who are just angry at you
>find something you really love to do
>do it, acquire skills, make small steps, get up again if you fail
>always try to do your best, you're not doing anything for your parents/teachers/boss. in the end you're doing it because you want to be one of the best of your profession
>to find something you like, you have to try stuff. you provably won't find anything sitting in your room all day jerking off
healthy relationships (friends, gf, co-workers):
>just always think how you'd like others to behave
>your decisions should be based upon morality, common sense and self-respect
>drink water, coke and the like should be exceptions (e.g. one bottle a week)
>learn to cook, reduce intake of heavily processed foods
>listen to your body, don't eat when you're not hungry, drink when your thirsty, be self-destructive when you feel like it
im a PC fan too! fuck xbone and playstation
If you're going to any store, make sure you have enough money before hand in change ( $1, $5, $10). If you buy a dollar worth of gum, and pay with a 20, you'll forever be an Asshole in the clerks eyes. If you get in good with them, you'll get discounts, and credit with the store.
very relevant and funny, you get an A for this post anon!
When you're in coach on an airplane and they come around with drinks, say that you want whatever it is you want, "and a cup of ice." They'll give you the cup of ice and the whole can of soda or juice or whatever. If you just say "Dr. Pepper" they'll give you about half the can in a cup of ice.
magnetize the end of your screwdriver to reduce time you spend looking for dropped screws
Do you like if customers are polite with you? I mean: Good Day, Thank You and Good Bye? Also do those feedback buttons in checkout make a difference? I always push the good one hoping it will make the cashiers day better.
Not that guy, but from my experience, they are just words. To really make the clerks day, relate to his day. Having a convo instead of just a hi, or thank you is a bit of a relief. Seeing as we see that as work.
A grand for a fucking ambulance ride? Holy shit man, I was carted away by ambulance, they hit me up with morphine, had a 12-lead on me, saline drip and Ringers.
Total cost to me: $40
Your country used to be so cool, now it just sucks massive donkey balls.
Yeah but there is always a line that he/she wants to get rid of. I mean I can't strike a conversation when they are weighing all the fruits and vegetables and looking up prices for items.
I do like it, we always appreciate nice customers. More willing to give you discounts and such too. As for the feedback things, I don't know, I've never seen those at a store before, is it a European thing?
hey guys, need advice.
best home remedies for anxiety? particularly akathisia? i used to take xanax but got addicted and i refuse to go through that bullshit again.
Yeah, it depends on the store. Grocery store/big department store etc.? Be polite but don't tell them your life story. Smaller or more specialized store, a short conversation is always nice unless it's very busy.
Yeah in European supermarkets cashiers have those three button displays. Good Service/ Long Line/ Bad Service. I like to push the Good Service even though there has been a long line or the cashier seems like beat up/ tired and forgets to great.
If you have nightmares EXTREMELY often (like i used to) and you want to have good dreams.. Try turning up the thermostat. I saw on the news when i was younger that cold temps could be linked to having bad dreams all the time. I tried making it a little warmer in the room and it totally worked. Its a little harder to get to sleep, but if you dont like bad dreams its worth it.
Whenever you are depressed or anxious inhale as deeply as your can expanding your stomach as large as possible, hold it for five seconds, then exhale. Repeat ten times.
I think that there is a physiological connection between the tenseness of your diaphragm and mental anxiety or discomfort. Stretch it as you would any other muscle and you will feel a sense of comfort and "presence".
cut a grape in half but leave a small amount if skin connecting them. microwave that shit
>Don't do what you love as a career, you will just end up getting burned out by it. Do it as a hobby, if you're good at it, turn it profitable
>Filter appropriate criticism from your boss, only take in what is important to note, ignore the other trashy words that come out from his mouth.
>A good indication of how your potential date will treat you in the future can be seen from your date. Watch how the person interacts with waiters/cleaners/subordinates, especially people that can do nothing for them.
>Don't be too ready to trust people, offers that are too good to be true are almost always a scam. Don't get scammed to learn your lesson, learn it now.
>Never trust /b/
if you need help sorting small objects or picking berries or whatever pick an asian. Their eyes move independently much like a chameleon. This means they can sort twice as fast as the average person
Paramedic fag here and this is absolutely not true in all instances. If it's something minor than yeah we will let you sign off but anything that makes us believe you are suffering from altered mental status, are unstable, or have the potential to worsen your condition. Here in NY we can use the 9.41 mental health law which is essentially an all encompassing law that allows us to physically restrain and transport you if we believe you are a danger to yourself (refusing aid obviously not in the right state of mind, look up implied consent) or others (this is more for people suffering from psych illness). It's hard to game us because we've probably seen it before.
>no food, only five dollars left
>cuts the crust off
Heh, shit dude, relax a bit. You're gonna throw a rod.
I'm pretty sure that you're fucking up your face man. If you doing things as drastic as putting Rogain on your face I have a tip that might help. Try changing your pillow cases every night before bed (to fresh clean pillow cases), also, use baking soda deluded in water every morning and night with a coco butter (yea the stuff black people use) cream after. Use apple cider vinegar deluded in water (1/1) EVERY OTHER DAY before you apply the cream. Rise well afterwards.
ambulances arent free, i just got a bill from the ambulance that took me to the hospital when the stairs leadin to the basement fell out from under me in a house i was working on. $1304.87 for a 20 min ride its bullshit. only agreed to go in the ambulance because i was badly shaken and had landed on my head so i couldnt really think about anything at the time
Yes, apply pressure to her bladder, only good things can happen then.
Yeah man America is all about how many hands can get in your pocket and private ambulance companies reslly fucking rape you and sometimes it's without justification. Example I'm a paramedic with an EMT partner if my ambulance shows up on your call instead of a double EMT ambulance you get charged a base fee of 2500 dollars because we are an advanced life support ambulance as opposed to a basic life support unit. My company requires the highest level of care to perform an assessment on the PT so that's another 700 for me possibly just talking to you. Then we charge ridiculously for every single intervention we perform and also bill her 1/16th of a mile. In all reality you might just need a ride to the hospital but thst ride could cost upwards of 4k without us even doing a single thing. It's a fucked up system bro. Unless you have medicaid of course, then the world is your fucking oyster.
>> Feeling bored and unfulfilled?
>1. Goto liquor store.
>2. Buy whiskey.
>3. Consume half a glass of said whiskey.
>4. Goto fancy bakery shop.
>5. Purchase 10 cookies.
>6. Walk around, hand out cookies.
>7. Strike up random conversations
Fucking saved for cringe thread
however after getting to the hospital it took them over an hour to get me into the MRI to make sure my brain wasnt bleeding, and after that came back negative they still wanted me to stay overnight for observation. When i told the doctor i wanted to leave that night (i had a ride there waiting with me, not like im trying to drive with a concussion) she told me i could go if I wanted to and so I did. still ended up with a $2700 bill from the hospital
Fill small water bottle with 1/4 sugar and 3/4 water
Drink one hour before school or work
Your voice will sound very dry and sickly
Hopefully after talking, your boss/parents will allow you to stay at home