Images are sometimes not shown due to bandwidth/network issues. Refreshing the page usually helps. The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact. You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random
>>604484340 My ex gf who I loved more than anything and gave everything too for 5 years, cheated on me last year and it's been a hard year moving on. And she texted me yesterday I'm no asshole so I texted back. Worst decision ever, feels came rushing in at Mach 10. No I'm confused
>>604486080 Fuck, I know that feel. My ex guilt tripped me into being her friend and then we hung out the next day and it made me realize everything about her that I miss and love. She's yet to talk to me since. Also she's dating my (ex) best friend. I assume she used me as a crutch because they were going through problems at the time. Sorry for the longish post anon.
>>604486715 Well she wants to hang out this weekend and get a drink. I'm guessing that why she wants to hang out with me she is probably having trouble in her relationship and using me for the time being. Still haven't wrote back after she texted me she missed me last night
>be me junior in highschool >meet new friends in English class >meet girl >didnt really like her at the time >shes cool but has a lot of guy friends >a lot >end of junior year still didn't like her >summer comes and start falling for her >senior year comes >2nd week of school >walk to class to talk to teacher she has the class 4th period and I have it 5th >she says "anon, are you in this class?" >say no back but she doesnt hear my reply because I was with my friend
didnt know she had a boyfriend until I saw them hugging 1 month into school
>fuckme.jpg >I didnt care that much to my surprise >meet knew friend who was a friend of my friend >durring lunch in November me and 4 friends randomly start talking shit on football players >he points a guy out and says "see that guy with the number (not saying it) jersey" >say yes >he says "he fucked (girl I liked name)"
long story short still in senior year 2 months before graduating they broke up in October, 1 month after I saw them hugging, every senior knows that they fucked should I continue? have more details
>>604488294 I feel like I depend too much on my partner, he's away with work at the minute and all I've done since he's been gone is watch fucking tv and sleep and fap. I just don't know what I want out of life, I don't know what I want to do for a career, I feel like I don't have enough time to live my life properly
>>604488771 All I do is come back from school, I either fall asleep or go on the internet and waste time on stupid shit, I always feel alone on fridays because most of my friends have jobs and do fun shit.
>>604489430 you just gotta find what you love and everything else will fall into place such as having somewhere to be, something to do and people to hang out with, everything will be better than this soon
>>604488987 The sad part is a pretend to be happy, smile laugh to my brother and sister, but deep inside I die every day just a bit. It all started going downhill when she got preg and got an abortion. Didn't really know what to think, at the time I didn't see her different but she moved on like it was nothing.
>>604483913 Got no job, no real friends and when i do go out and socialize it only makes me feel even more alone. Live at a shitty place with nothing around can't get a job. No future. Shits been going on for years and i truly wonder if it will ever get better.
I'm still having dreams about my EX. not a daily basis. but like once or twice a week.
I don't stalk her, or have any contact with her.. we broke up pretty mutuality. Recently a friend of mine told me she had a new job somewhere close to my house and that he talked to her, and she asked about me.. I avoid the area all together to not even see her. I've already had relationships and fuck buddy's since our break up, took me 2 weeks to get a fuck buddy.. but we were together for a good amount of time, and did everything together.
I have slight hate for her because instead of telling me 6 months earlier she wanted to just end it,and that she had some fat un/fit/ dude lined up to be the next "big" thing, pun intended.
>for fucks sake, how do you go from a guy who drives an 1973 Opel GT with a Straight 8. to a fatneckbeard who drives a 1990's red mustang... Stock.... like the autism in her was real.
sometimes I wonder if she thinks of me.. but when people bring her up, I just pretty much ignore them.
Also I know if she fucking wanted to actually talk to me, she'd call/text my cell. I've had the same fucking number since highschool, and we knew each other since middle. and she had my number memorized, women don't forget that shit... I know better.
>>604490572 This is true for all relationships but when you aren't contributing you are really letting yourself down while investing in someone who isn't you.You should first figure yourself out and then invest. No-one is more important than you
who am I kidding, I never had a life because of IBS.. and people going around telling me to get over it.. and just ignore it. and that they have a friend who has IBS and he works.. and blah blah blah.
Like IBS is such a general term, and lots of people have it. mostly due to stress and bad eating, but I fucking stay stress free, FFS I don't even got a job, I can't be stress. and eat very healthy, yet I still have IBS attacks, and the doctors don't even know WTF to do any more. no medication works!
For the rest of the earth’s organisms, existence is relatively uncomplicated. Their lives are about three things: survival, reproduction, death—and nothing else. But we know too much to content ourselves with surviving, reproducing, dying—and nothing else. We know we are alive and know we will die. We also know we will suffer during our lives before suffering—slowly or quickly—as we draw near to death. This is the knowledge we “enjoy” as the most intelligent organisms to gush from the womb of nature. And being so, we feel shortchanged if there is nothing else for us than to survive, reproduce, and die. We want there to be more to it than that, or to think there is. This is the tragedy: Consciousness has forced us into the paradoxical position of striving to be unself-conscious of what we are—hunks of spoiling flesh on disintegrating bones.
>>604491589 It seems like you never finished it. You have to believe you two are not good for each other, if you still have only a littlebit hope of getting back together you will have dreams about her. Asepcially if you had such close contact for so long.
I cant take this shit at all anymore. I seriously have visions of me killing myself all the damn time. I cant stop cutting my thighs. Its fucking hard. I've been sent to the mental hospital. Made it fucking worse. I dobt know what to do anymore.
I've got this feeling of pointlessness that's been festering inside of me. Lately, everyone has talked about how their career is or what their dream is, only to realize I have a really shitty dream. I want to get a van and travel. Just do odd jobs for money and gas on the way. And, you know that's a horrible idea. I don't want to do it alone though. I need companions.
>>604491967 Wut.. does that even have to do with what I posted?
>>604492039 Thing is, in my mind, we were good for each other. she decided she wanted to try to be "grown up" and try other things, so I let her go to not hold her back. It was a rough 8 months before we broke up, we never fought, just kinda ignored each other.
but she blamed me and the way I act.. but she didn't have these problems w/ me until the end? seems so odd. I was nothing but good to her... sure I showed some tough love at times because she did need to grow the fuck up, and get some friends and quit always breathing down my neck.. but I have my own hobbies and with her around I could never do them because she would be left out/confused or just straight up didn't wanna go.
anyway I still do miss her company, but I figured maybe when another long term girl comes around I'd be good. and i'd gain that company back.
I just feel worthless. The girl I love gave me up for damn drugs. She even told me she's loved me. And she's told me that she would do anything for me. Then she fucking throws me in the trash. That's what's on my mind right now. But i have been diagnosed with bipolar anxiety depression ptsd. It fucking sucks knowing I'm a fucking psychopath.
>>604493153 Well what do you enjoy doing man? Find something. That's helped me. Don't get me wrong I still feel like shit everyday, but it's a bit less when I do things I enjoy. Did you want her to keep it?
I'm can't stop pushing people away. I have a gf who loves me unconditionally but i know she can do much better (she's like 9/10). but i love her . but if it were anyone else i wouldn't even try to communicate. i'm pretty much a mess.
>>604490318 Agreed like how is a girl you aren't even with or ever were.upsetting you you didnt even care enough to find.out she had a boyfriend. He is going to be real upset when hes out of highschool and every woman has had miles of dick
Turned 18 a month ago. You know they say that once you're an adult, the world is yours for the taking. But so far Ive got nothing. Kissless virgin, no job, still stuck in highschool for 3 months, mediocre grades. Got accepted to UC Fulleton, but parents can't help me pay for it. Own a car but it leaks oil and the transmission is failing. Only thing that provides solace is videogames and even those are getting boring. I honestly have no direction in life and no motivation or plans for my future. C'est la vie.
>>604494173 The day after my mother died I went over to my parents house to help my dad make funeral arrangements. As I walked in the front door my brain momentarily forgot and I blurted out "what'd mom make for lunch today?" I had to go home after that. I couldn't stay there.
I got my first drum kit when I was around 7. "Little drummer boy" my dad would call me. He saw me tapping to the beat when he was playing an old jazz number when I was around five and knew I had musical ability. He would joke about making a band together, father a son. The new face of blues and when I was 10 we did just that. We were nothing big, hell it was blues. We played a few bars with other washed up artists but at least I was different. At school the kids would tease me calling me a faggot and beating me up, you know the drill. I started writing my own songs. We would play them, and one song was our fans' favourite. "Small town, small funds, small house." It was about everything in my world. From the time I wake up to the day I sleep. I never looked into my fathers lyrics but he'd always look at mine and give me a some sort of look of sadness whilst looking proud.
He died when I was 15. I'm 28 now. I play for different bands on call. Jazz, rock, I even helped record an underground hip-hop labels drum samples but it's not enough money, still need a job to pay rent and I've got one.
I was looking through my his old stuff after being reminded of his death at my workplace. He left all of his songs in his will but I've never looked at them or there titles. I read the lyrics and burst into tears. Some he never played with me and were just for his solo gigs. "Little drummer boy" Litttle drummer boy How I adore Little drummer boy Don't cry no more
Mommy's gone But daddy loves you Indefinitely Until the day the roses sent to your door
Little drummer boy Fly your kite Little drummer boy Dream a site
Mommy's gone But daddy loves you Indefinitely Until the day the roses sent to your door
>>604490509 Same thing is happening to me. Almost exactly the same. I would suggest occupy your mind with other things before bed. It could help with the dreams. I still get the dreams every week or so. Guess I just have to hope they'll stop.
>>604495067 Yeah I do, normally I think about my motorcycle projects and shit.. but still sometimes that shit creeps up on me when I'm SUPER tired and go to bed...
There was a moment about 6 months ago, I had a motorcycle accident, and was in the hospital.. sitting there loaded up on pain pills, I cried and wished she was there.. dunno why I did that, most likely the drugs.
>>604483913 life story time. I'm 19 years old. Turning 20 in june.
tl;dr version >heavily depressed since 13 >one or two good friends, noone else. >family emotionally distant. >lived online, never left my room but for school. >little sister raped at 13, sexually groomed from 12-15, drugs involved. > last straw, camels back >2 relationships to date, 2, 3 month respectively. >little to no romantic social skills.
depressed for years, came to uni last year. started being social, life got better.
rewind to 2014'15 new years > go to new years at older sisters boyfriends place, real nice place > meet sisters best friend, haven't seen her in years > I've changed a lot compared to what I used to be, 2013 currently best year of my life. > hit it off with her > summerlove.jpeg > going well, troubles fade when im with her > this morning, find out she's got this new guy max > haven't seen or spoken to her in 12 days. > keep asking myself where I fucked up.
I love her /b/ros. I can wait forever to get better, for times to change, but. . . not with her. It hurts.
Bought cigs this morning, I've been ok for the past week (trying to quit), went and got baked afterwards. I'm a waste of space. Accomplishing nothing.
saturday march 7 i like to sit in empty rooms in the wee hours of the weekend, pretending that they’re mine the sound of distant birds and passing time cooling vents are gently breathing i haven’t got the time
i wish i could eat books
what does the day smell like?
where would i be without mourning doves?
sunday march 8 i dreamt i was being licked on the face by a puppy it gave me all its joy and love but soon after i awoke and got over the amazement, i realized puppies love everyone
monday march 9 why do we only run when we’re late?
i was sitting in a cafe, a people watchin’ when a man ran through the streets flustered yelling “i’m late for life!”
saturday march 14 i sometimes laugh more at laughter than the joke
monday march 16 where does your soul live?
tuesday march 17 i’ll never be as cool as sean malto i’d like to live in a world where garbage trucks are silent
>>604495820 I feel for you anon, I know the feeling of putting so much into someone, and they have the ability to yank it all away from you. You didn't fuck up, this is on her. and her loss too. Why would she just get up and leave like that?
>be me >love my gf deeply >me = IT consultant and analyst >me = makes decent wages enough to support the both of us + her 2 kids >gf insists on working two shitty jobs >had the jobs before we started dating heavy >works all day and all fucking night >insists on it as if we're poor >doesn't make shit compared to me and I work out of my home office >barely brings home a paycheck, spends it all on kids regardless of what I buy them >gf complains incessantly about having to work shitty jobs >I tell her she no longer has to work those jobs >me = horny as shit bc gf works all day = no sex >"No, anon, I can't expect you to do everything" >me = willing to do everything >be today >be horny as fuck because nosex >gf sexting me, promises sex tonight >see that she's bought sexy lingerie from Victoria's Secret >wait anxiously all for her to get off work >she gets off work and takes an hour long fucking shower >meanwhile bratty kids refuse to fucking go to sleep The kids actually aren't that bad, it's just tonight for some insane reason they would NOT go to bed tonight >she finally emerges from the bathroom in baggy "comfortable" pajamas >WTF? >complains she is tired and feeling sick >goes to sleep, me still up with her kids
>I’ve come to realize that I can’t get emotionally attached to people. I mean, I’m very sociable, talkative and get along with everybody, even though I’m also very introspective. I’m that kind of person that gets along with everybody.
>People usually like me a lot, they say I’m really nice or funny. The problem is, I can’t get emotionally attached in a deeper level, like in a relationship.
>I never fell in love or anything like that. I think I’m very needed and also have a need to please people. If I find a girl who gives me attention and is cute, I start to think a lot about her, but as soon as it comes, it also goes.
>>604495924 >>604494471 Good to know I'm not alone. And it's not like I can't get a girl. There are girls out there interested in me, not many, but they exist. Sadly I don't find any of them attractive physically or personality wise. Guess I have high standards. But honestly looks are a minor factor for me. I just want someone to spend time with. Someone I know values me not for what I have or what I look like, but for who I am. Someone I can trust to return all the feeling I have for them and never bettay me. But it's hard to find someone like that nowadays. Oh well, atleast I have a place to live. That's a plus.
>>604494585 Ok hear it goes > be me 14 of age > in a long term prank war with grandpa > stated it with stuff like tape on the kitchen hose sink > escalated to him burning all my underwear > do this stupid shit to eachother whenever we get the chance > until one day I come up with the ultimate prank > wait for a good time to do it > spending a week at their house during summer > he loves his Dr.pepper >a whole lot > there has been a cease for for a while now > perfect chance > he asks me to bring him a Dr.pepper > with a shit eating grin I say "sure" > go and get one and open it > before giving it to him I got rid of ask the Dr.pepper > then I poured high sodium soy sauce in > recapped it and gave it to him > he looks at me strangely > he taps the lid to see if I shook it up >I tell him >"if you can chug this you'll win the prank war" > he accepts the challenge > opens it without thinking > starts chugging soy sauce > he drank the entire bottle > holyshit.png > I can't believe he did it >I leave the room to go watch tv > fall asleep > wake up to ambulance sirens > he had a heart attack > the doctorssaid he intook a huge amount of sodium before he died > haven't told a soul since > never even found out if he knew it was soy sauce Did I Fuck up /b/?
>>604496640 i don't know, I'm pretty ugly tbh, probably a 3/10. The only girls that have ever showed any interest are complete mutants. I always imagined losing my v-card would be with someone i loved, or at least found remotely attractive.
>>604497235 Land a chubby that has a cute face, and that you could work /out/ with and make her sexy.. she will always be that chubby girl in her mind, and you get a fucking girl that wont leave you and is pretty fucking decent. but even cute faced chubs are kinda hard to find, not gonna lie.
>>604497749 I know man. It's selfish of me to say this, but sometimes I drive and wish I got into a horrible accident because I'm too much of a pussy to take my own life (even though I've tried a couple of times) alcohol "helps" though.
Just had spring break at uni. took the time to think about what's been happening with my life. been depressed all break thinking about it. >got together with a girl for the first time, she left because of an ex >gave number to chick who didn't call me back, made me feel like I'm not worth it >working 40 hours a week for what feels like beans >trying to keep my grades up at school.
I feel like nothing is worth it, even if I do get a better job after uni, I'll just have to work even harder to land said job. what am I doing wrong with wemon and will I ever get laid? what's the point of working so hard to only give it to bills and food? what's the point?
This girl I've known for years has depression and cuts all the time. We've told each other we love each other a lot, and we both mean it, but she has tried to commit suicide at least twice in one year. Her parents tell her that shes overreacting and her dad tells her shes worthless and a piece of shit. He told her he wanted to disown her, and he has bruised her before and choked her. She tells me everything, and even tells me things she doesnt tell her closest girl friends. She says Im her best friend but Im afraid of losing her /b/. I love her so much, and I dont know if she feels the same. I dont know what to do, I cant seem to stop her from self harm and suicide.
>>604486311 Whats the point of offing yourself? there may be little in the world, but we always have to make way with what we have, that is the point of living, and its to suffer, but people who kill themselfs will never know true happieness
/b/, I've been scared to post here for a long time. But I feel like you guys are the the only ones that could understand me right now.
I'm only 20, but I'm already done with life. Still a virgin but I don't care. Would love to have a family, but don't want to burden them with the likes of me. I swear the only thing that keeps me going is you guys and my little brother. And sometimes I feel like even that's not enough
>>604498912 It's common amongst those of us who are depressed. We aren't dead because of those we love. We don't want to live, and spread the suffering. For six years people have told me depression is temporary. They say, come live in our world, you'll like it.
My dads memory is getting worse, anons. He never had a good memory, he was always forgetting things. But recently, it's gotten really bad. My mom left the house for 15 minutes yesterday, and my dad was freaking out, thinking it had been hours. Today, he went on a hike, and when he came back, he had to go on his computer and find the path on google earth, going over each path he took. Afterwords, he didn't remember doing it. He barely remembered the hike. He didn't know what day it was, and he kept forgetting entire conversations. I'm afraid that pretty soon, he'll start forgetting me.
I always told myself I'd off myself before 21, and now im 22. It's been a fucking struggle, but that's because I want to die a lot. I'm bipolar and I just can't control myself sometimes. I feel like a neet and am kinda expecting myself to flip and off myself one day. I have a gf, but I have no meds anymore and I'm not well.
I'm still trying, but tonight has been really hard, hence the reason im here.
>>604499519 But how do you guys keep up with life? I'm in college now, separated from my brother. I find out my parents are fighting over custody of him, bringing him to tears, and I feel utterly helpless. Let alone the fact that I'm barely passing my classes as it is.
>>604500430 At the moment I'm not keeping up. My grades are non-existant. All I want to do is go back to my hometown and spend time with my family, spend time with my friends there, and forget. I can't though. The world expects more of me, I expect more of myself. Which makes it all the harder when I look myself in the mirror and see the bags under my eyes, my face dead, and wonder what the fuck I am doing. It's a struggle to get up in the morning. I can't kill myself, yet I won't let myself live.
fuck fuck fuck
I've gotten really good at smiling and laughing. keeps others out, makes people leave me alone. Makes people think you're normal, and not struggling with suicide nightly.
>>604500324 Just been through so much shit in my life. Been on suicide watch since I was 8, parents have fought since before I was born and use the rest of the kids and I as messengers, had my closest friends die, been only in one relationship with another girl in my life, and that's when I was being hospitalized for trying to shoot myself and getting a dud bullet. That girl made me want to change, but after a week out of the hospital, I try finding her, and find her obituary on a google search. She overdosed the day she went home. Just... shit like this has plagued me my entire life, and it's numbed me just about everything.
I know that most of you hate humanity and are pessimistic about its future, but everytime i listen to this speech http://youtube.com/watch?v=w8HdOHrc3OQ i realize that its not my fellow human which is destroying the world, its the leaders of this species that are driving this planet and species to shit. Anyways, listen to it. It is still scarily relevant today.
>>604501318 Same thing for me every morning. I started as a computer engineering major, but learned that I can't program, nor can I do circuitry right. I know I'm going to fail those classes, but I decided to change my major to English because I'm somewhat good at it. But I know I'm probably gonna be hungry and jobless with an English degree. I just want to fucking give up
> Be me > I am a loud funny guy and people say I am hilarious I am "That friend" > But on the inside I want to talk about philophosy and other more deep stuff, > Meet this girl right away think she is the one > Ask her out 3 weeks after we met, went to talk to her > Explained that I wanted people to see me differently in a more emotional and philosophical way > Tells me i should be open about it with all my friends and try to talk about it > However I tried talking to one 'close' friend of mine about conspiracy and philophosy > Reply "lol Im not interested in that shit" > Guess i should go back to making racist jokes and stuff again, its the only part of me people seem to enjoy > Btw that girl ignores me now and thinks im creepy
>>604486743 Are you sure about that anon? Cause I just sunk 2000 dollars into my car fixing it up and now I'm gonna need another 500 I don't have and have a phone bill of about 250 I've been pushing off and I'm out of a job :/
>>604502512 Alright well basically I was never the relationship type i would just go for one nighters. But once i met her things popped and we talked and good we have been dating for a year and shes the only person i care about and i love her but lately i dont know shes been bi polar. One minute she loves me and wants me to come over and we have a good time then the next day she doesnt want anything to do with me like she wont even talk to me for no reason at all. She is having the worst mood swings and its pissing me off to the max to the point where im almost done and but i dont know if its a phase or shes gonna be doing this for awhile
>>604503254 Don't kill yourself anon. That sounds random but I had a friend like you who I liked to talk to when I had girl problems or deep philosophy thoughts, he had girl problems and eventually killed himself and I miss him. I was the one who found his body and the state it was in was terrible and made me want to vomit. I miss him badly he was always there for me. Like the big brother I never had
>>604496080 don't worry Anon, I was basically kissless and a virgin until I was 22
>long distance relationship >travel to a different country to see her >get to her house sweaty and dirty as fuck >asks if I want to take a shower and I agree >walk to bathroom, she starts taking my clothes off >gives my dick a tug >continues taking off my clothes as my dick turns into diamonds >she smiles as she takes my underwear off >we get in the shower >wants to do anal first >try to penetrate, her ass is too tight >fail horribly, finish showering >gives me a handjob instead and we watch television >tired from the plane ride, so I sleep >wake up at 3am, wake her up >we fuck Came buckets. Also she was a virgin as well, so it was horribly awkward for both of us, but we still enjoyed it. For the 3 months I was there, we continued to fuck pretty much everyday.
>>604486311 Was in the same position as you a few years ago. You are here in this life and this life is whatever you can make it. You can make it free and beautiful Go outside and spread positivity to a few people at least and make a change
>>604495233 I used to cut too. Got scars on my arm. My ex once looked at my arm and really sadly said, "why did you do this?" Today I'm a businessman, I lift weights, excel in martial arts and love life. But the scars remind me of a dark time in my life, but also remind me that I made it through pure resilience and an unwillingness to accept defeat. If you have a will to rise from depression and self-loathing, you will. I guarentee
I love there threads. I don't consider myself a social person. But whenever I feel the need for support and friends I get plenty of it from you anons. thank you. I want to hug each and Every one of you and tell you I care. N-no homo
>>604504165 Thx bro I am not suicidal but im just sick of acting like im some loud and racist male It is just that whenever I try to talk about something meaningful people just ignore me. Are not interested I got a few friends who are cool like that but I got to admit. It has gone as far me not knowing who I really am at some times. Thx /b/ro just tired of this act
>>604512664 >>604512133 Are there some of you in this thread with some identity issues. Like you feel u need to behave differently around people in order for them to like you. Just want to know that I am not alone.
One of my friends gf was trying to get me to talk to with on of her friends. Well we have but all we have done is tested several times.
Just this today she says she wants to hang out with me and shit tomorrow and I say maybe. Fast forward to just a few mins ago she tells me she's in the mood for sex. I just say me to and that it's been a while. She says she'll change that jk.
On one hand I do wanna meet a new girl and Fuck her but on the other I got out of a relatuinship with daddy issued girl and I'm tired of it all.
>>604512664 That's pretty normal don't you think? I'd still try to meet some people outside of school. Make it people you don't really care about. Test subjects. Be yourself around. Get used to being comfortable in your own skin. Perhaps it will help you identify with who you Are. Which is maybe a little bit of both? Find a happy medium. What I did is Make sure I have friends that I can party with, friends I can do sports with, and friends I can discuss important things with. Careful not to cconfine yourself to only one social circle. Besides, diversity is interesting!
>>604513085 You're not alone bro. Acceptance is everything. But what you'll see is that if you learn to like yourself then others will like you and respect that. Remember, you can't get everyone to like you though.
>>604514171 I finally was able to mention something to my dr. It went well and they gave me an SSRI. I've cancelled 2 appts for various reasons and now I've rescedualed for the 30th. Hopefully I make this one.
I just watched a bunch of stupid shit on youtube that me and my pals used to watch together. I moved away a couple years ago and we don't talk anymore. They were my best friends, but now I'm gone from them.
>17 year old kissless virgin >zero friends >zero people to talk to >only people i talk to are my lil bro and mother >they are getting fed up of my shit too >constantly in conflict with mom >Little brother doesnt really want to talk to me but feels bad for me and sometimes invites me to hang with his friends >embarassing as fuck for me >depressed as fuck >depression so bad that i havent been going to school for half year now. Has happened before too. >talking to (let alone fucking) girls is a distant dream for me.
Dont know what to do in life anymore. If it wasnt for my mom working her ass off i would be homeless now. If i would die today zero fucks would be given outside of my family.
Don't know if any of you faggots go to /a/, but I remember this thread. I still get strong feels every time I read the screencaps. Even though I've lost my friends, my fiancee died, and my family disowned me, all I have to do is remember this thread. Lets me keep going on.
Just wanna say thanks guys. /b/ and /a/ has been my home for a little more than 3 years now (newfag, cancer, yup, that's me), but it's been a lot of fun. Going through MEPS and into Basic as an infantryman almost immediately after. Its been real, it's been fun, and fuckin' A it's been real fun. I'll be back home in a couple years or so. >inb4 faggot Yeah, I know.
>>604520557 Lol college is were i met alot of my true buds now, and my fiance. None the less ive had my very good share of hard times, including now. Stay strong anon, we just gotta out live the dinosaurs to make it big.
>>604520867 I tried looking through some of the archived baww threads, but no luck. >>604520792 Those feels exactly, i recently lost my little brother. It was about 5 months ago. Regardless im still not ready.
>>604521213 If you do want to make it back, nows the time. My fiances father told me the wars calming down, but who know when some bullshit will pop up again. All in all power to you anon. Im waiting for my probation to end. The ille be like my brothers.
>>604521100 When I feel like crying, I just listen to music that reminds me of my fiancee and hold the necklace she gave me for Christmas. We had a matching set, and I leave hers at the head of the bed. I can stare for hours at my necklace while listening to her favorite songs and reminiscing. Tears flow easily then.
>>604521598 I've felt the same way before anon. Can't make a long post since we're over the bump limit, but make a place for yourself anon. I've lost pretty much everything but I'm still me, and I'm going to live my life.
You gotta make your home mate, and then everything will fall into place. And don't forget, for all the shit we say here, or maybe because of it, this website here is home. I know it is for me, anyways.
>>604521100 Something similar happen to me but with my dog. He stayed with me 14 years and i cant cry, i mean my oldest dog died and im just standing there trying to cry but i just feel bad, not even that bad.
>>604521372 Dude my friend come from nowhere, im always isolated from the others because i want but this one guy makes me think that i was not the only one. I admire him so much, he is so smart. He teach me things that i need for the college and other things about technology that i like that i didnt know.
If i would be able to change things 6 years ago (24) i would like to tell me that people is not bad, you can open yourself and then stop talking with someone that you dont like or you think that is bad. That there are many girls that i can like and they can answer in the same way.
>>604519532 Yeah i read that, was a really good read. Things like that inspire me, but a reality check quickly slaps that out of me. What that guy experienced (if true anyways) was luck while being in an unlucky situation. For every guy wich ends up with a beautiful wife, a formidable social circle, a great job and a nice car there are 10 guys out there ending up homeless, raped, shot and die alone. The worst part for me is that at this moment right now i have zero skills wich could save my ass if i was to live on my own. The only thing i am good enough at to earn some money from is fighting, and i am no where near enough conditioned to fight (i am overweight and in poor health). And i am not even dumb. I dont know my exact IQ and i dont want to come over as an atheist "indepedent thinker" edgelord, but i got tested to be (very) highly gifted by a pyschologist (school wanted me to prove that i wasnt dumb and my mom didnt want the exact number for whatever reason). I have huge problems with energy and drive. I literally have zero energy. Anything that requires effort is too much for me. When i see my schoolwork i get dizzy. I cannot get ANYTHING done and its driving me further into this spiral of depression.
Y'know what? I'll share my story. Maybe give you kids some hope. > be me, freedman year of high school > At the time, 9th grade was held at the junior high, while 10th+ were at the high school > I'd been playing viola since sixth grade > the councillor called me a week or so before school started and told me that since there were only four freshmen playing strings, we'd be on the high school orchestra >hotdang.jpeg > school starts and everything is pretty easy peasy > then we get the sheet music for high school orchestra >crap.png > this music looked terrifyingly difficult > now, at the same time this was going on, I had been suffering from bad headaches > I'd also get random bouts of self doubt and sadness >I did some research, and I connected some dots >I asked my mom to take me to our family doctor because I suspected that I had depression > we went there and lo and behold, the doc wrote me a prescription for anti-depressants Cont?
>>604522177 My middle brother can't gain any weight himself anon, he's same height as me (5'8") and only 105 pounds. He just moved in with the girl he had a crush on in High School after losing contact with her for years. He's a fucking awesome brother. I bet you would be too. Fuckin' my skeletor of a brother is happy and successful; you can be too mate, in whatever way you define it to be. Trust me.
>>604522190 I hear bro, drank myself close to death about 5 months ago, would've been an hero if my mom didn't come and see me on the floor with the empty bottle of pills, alcohol isn't the answer it just numbs the pain and it always hits you harder getting back Into reality
>>604522601 just so sick of thinking of any of them. betrayed by the 3 people i put the trust in. the only person i trust now is my current best friend. he'd never hurt me, he's even kept me around after hurting Him. i have other friends, but he's special.
>>604522674 Hey, we're all brothers here. And if you feel like it, go ahead and call your half-brother. I found out too late what it meant to have a family after I got disowned. Know that you can make it. I believe in you mate. After all, I've lost all of my loved ones and friends, my home and livelihood, but I'm going to be starting anew in the military today. If I can do it, you sure as hell can brother.
>>604522177 Start eating like a fucking hippo and workout bo, you need to be onatleast a 5k diet to gin mass quick. If you really want it bad and it eels impossible, do what zyzz did, go get some juice. A few couple f years n the lime light is better then an eternity in the dark
Thread replies: 319 Thread images: 72
Thread DB ID: 46902
All trademarks and copyrights on this page are owned by their respective parties. Images uploaded are the responsibility of the Poster. Comments are owned by the Poster.
This is a 4chan archive - all of the content originated from them. If you need IP information for a Poster - you need to contact them. This website shows only archived content.
If a post contains personal/copyrighted/illegal content you can contact me at email@example.com with that post and thread number and it will be removed as soon as possible.