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Archived threads in /biz/ - Business & Finance - 137. page
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File: Shkreli-1024x576.jpg (83 KB, 1024x576) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFSf5YhYQbw

How do I get Shkreli-tier excel skills?

My excel is great, but using the mouse for some stuff makes me slower than I should be, his is banker-level.

Where do I go to git gud at no-mouse excel?
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>>1545954
Also, on another point, basically all he seems to be doing here is taking shit from an annual report and applying excel formulae to it. Did a bit of this in college, but hadn't thought about it like that until now.

It strikes me that it'd be easy enough to write something in python that parses a report, manipulates the data using pandas or xlwings or something, and then spits out a model in an excel sheet or csv or whatever the fuck, it'd take like 30 seconds.

If that's the case, why...
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>>1545954
He's a huge loser (read that twice please, Martin).

Alpha males like myself have learned to program in order to automate his faggotry bullshit.
>>
>>1545954

So far i've watched him punch numbers into a spreadsheet for 20m

In 20m i could've written a scraper that creates the file he is making. Why doesn't he do that

ID RATHER BE ALL ALONE
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THE VERY WORST PART OF ME IS YOUUUUU
>>
>>1545950

What stocks?
>>
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and it all came tumbling down, tumbling down
Rip my life savings

Let's say I have a Forex account in which I have made consistent ~5% returns each month for a year.

I have no contacts, and work alone. How would I go around in order to find people to invest their money with me. I don't have much capital, but I know how to invest it. Should I advertise on Craigslist, cold call tons of people with money in my city, or what?

Advice needed.
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Wow, such a helpful community. Probably nobody here has ever actually invested money.
>>
>>1545850
You're a moron if you think anyone is going to give you money to trade Forex.
You couldn't pick a more risky endeavor to shill.
>>
>>1545853
Call me retarded when you make 4000 pips in 2 weeks.

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YOU READY FO SOME SHIT ON MARKET CRACKA
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Not ready PLEASE STOP THE CRASH I WANT TO GET OFF
>>
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TOO LATE NOW
>>
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I am ready.

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>Have depressive episode
>Call off work
>Get fired next day
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Post your boss's telephone number, I'm gonna call him a cunt.
>>
>>1545731
>>>/r9k/
>>
At least you aren't a wagecuck anymore.

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I want to ask if there's anyone here with some small business experience? I been doing Aquarium Service maintenance for about 5 years. I got started in it because I was hobbyist at first and later my SCUBA and pool operation/plumbing skills perfectly mixed. I done work for big super big clients and aquariums that you would more likely see in public aquariums. However when it comes down to it I was still working for someone or a service company. It came down to me basically cleaning up other peoples shoddy work and messes as well as not really making a lot of money ( I was...
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So my question is on how to setup a workable business plan?

There's a lot of factors I need to take in consideration, I've looked up online templates for some plans but I'm skeptical on them and they honestly seem really amateurish.

Some of the more obvious things like getting an LLC and general liability insurance I've already done.
>>
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Just a preview of one of my client tanks.
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>>1545725
Fuck I love aquariums. Would be cool to have a business for them

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>live with parents after graduation
>spending money like a madman mainly on junk food and coffee
>tfw waste so fucking much

I spent about £130 on food in about 7 days after I received my pay, not that I was paying attention.

Was anyone else like me?
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>>1545668
never go full retard, unless you are a billionaire.
>>
>>1545668
Easy solution: stop doing that.
>>
>£130 on food in about 7 days
Hold the presses? Troll thread I suppose.

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Here's the deal, /biz/antines. I want to buy canadian stocks in legal weed. I live in the UK. Shit is blowing up and I want in. Is it worth it logistically speaking- and most of all, is it possible? This is my first incursion in the stock market btw so please be gentle and use lube on me, lads.
6 replies and 2 images submitted. Click here to view.
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Is it worth it? No.
Is it possible? Yes, find a broker who allows you to trade on the TSX
This is my first time. Not surprised.

Buy something which isn't retarded, it'all be a lot easier and make money.
>>
>>1545659
DUDE WEED will be a short lived meme. Once it's fully legal everywhere, it's not going to be cool and edgy anymore, and people will stop caring.
>>
>>1545710

The issue is whether OP is in soon enough and with enough money to make money off of it.

It doesn't matter if it falls off later if he gets out before it gets bad/already made his money.

It is a meme because the investments are going to stop paying off once weed blows up, but OP can still get a short term profit off of it if he's smart.

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Should insider trading be legalized?
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Why in the world would you want to do that?
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>>1545637
muh free market
>>
>>1545634
less normies would invest in the stock market.

might be a good thing not sure.

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Hi, fellow people.
I am thinking about a new business concept. There is a black area in a city about 1 1/2 hour away, I was thinking of moving in and starting a fried chicken (cold for EBT customers) and hot fresh fried chicken, and selling malt liquor, vodka, beer, cheap alcohol, lotto tickets, condoms, glass roses, and marijuana when it becomes legal.

What do you think of trying to do business with african-american areas of nice cities.?

Is a fried chicken / liquor/convenience store even viable with food safety laws?

Who doesn't love beer + fried chicken?
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Make sure you pack heat
>>
Its fine if you find a place that doesnt already have 5 of these. A liquor store that sells food in the hood is pretty common.
>>
DO EET!
Smart/10.

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Is this really how poorfags see the world?
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>>1545396
Yes, because that's what it is you skype.
>>
>>1545467
/thread
>>
>>1545396
well not imbeciles know that the operating expenses are greatly go to salaries paid. and profit goes to shareholders not the management.
management gets fat bonuses if the shareholders are happy. but they often have no life in return. always on call always available to clients and superiors.

What will trigger the next crash?
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Oil being traded in any other currency besides USD
>>
>>1545407
Why would this be bad?

t. autist
>>
Trump winning the election will cause US markets to crash, screenshot this bitch

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>Move to Europe from North America two weeks ago.
>Please submit your CV to apply for position.
>Try to find good CV examples online, but all look generic and similar to a resume.

Can someone please post an example of a really well refined CV? I am trying to find one that will stand out, but still be professional. So far all I can find are generic examples that look childish, or just not professional enough.

Also CV/Resume general.
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i have a couple i saved cause i liked some stuff about them, they're not bad
>>
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>>1545305
would definitely change the font on that first one though

this ones a bit more hipster
>>
just google until you find a good CV, make some shit up, the job is almost yours. laugh at university snobs wasting years kek

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>tfw too intelligent to invest
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Good stay poor
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>>1545285
Tell me your secrets, o wise one.
>>
>>1545285
>too intelligent to invest
>invest
You're doing the meme wrong. The word you're looking for is "trade."

Memes are only funny when they reflect an underlying truth. Stupid shit like you posted is just stupid shit.

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Have close to $60K in savings after 3 years of being a company truck driver.

Should quit and go to school for nursing, or buy a truck and become o/o?
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>>1545245
I am 26 (27 in January) by the way.
>>
>>1545245
Buy potcoin
>>
>>1545245
>Should I waste 3 years of savings to get an education that will lead me to cleaning up terminal patients shit out of their pants for minimum wage?

No, no you shouldn't.

You should invest that money elsewhere.

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anyone want to start a pump gang on ST and similar such sites? we could organize things in irc or skype

plan is we make tens of accounts on those sites and start shilling fake shit all at the same time on some penny stock we all buy early and start the spamming fake shit on start of any minor surge. one good way is to ddos the companys website before posting a fake url news link starting the spam so the site goes on the "not enough bandwidth" mode and idiots think its true and there are just too much people trying to see the great news at same time while we...
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>>1545244
V O I D Y
O
I
D
Y
>>
>>1545244
Im up for this but only in crypto
>>
i just figured out that if you replace the uncapslockked version of L (l), it will look like capslocked letter "i" (I) in twitter

so we make a fake twitter account of some big company and buy followers to make the follower count match the real companys twitter profile etc and we copy all the tweets and pictures they have etc and then link the tweet of our fake profile to some idiots on st to make them believe its buying out some penny stock company and it will skyrocket, this combined with whats on OPs post

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So basically my boss told me today that he'll only be hiring GenZ workers from now on.
He said they're:
>More pragmatic
>Multitask faster
>Are quiet and do as they're told when they're told
>Cheaper
>Specialised in one STEM skill and learn on their own time and dime
And, I shit you not, that they:
>Don't try to improve [his] work

So are "we"...
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>>1545112
Oh, an apparently
>Millennials only work for money
>Millennials don't trust bosses/companies
>Millenials are entitled
>Millenial are cheap and too frugal
>Millenials don't like face to face contact
And my other favourite
>Millenials dream/believe they can do anything
>>
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>>1545112
>tfw Gen X
>>
>>1545112
What comes after Z?
End of the world?

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What is /biz/'s favorite drug (legal and illegal)?
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>>1545016
Legal: Alcohol
Illegal: Weed
>>
>>1545016
Legal: weed
Illegal: xtc
>>
>>1545016
Money.

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>havent been to work in 2 weeks
>big boss called me in and told me he needed to speak with me

am i fired or am i getting promoted for showing some backbone lads?
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fired or reprimanded
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>>1545005
if reprimanded ill show signs of not caring. would they just fire me then or give me a raise and Tony's office?
>>
>>1545010
Fired. Come back and let us know how it works out for you.

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/biz/ what do u do when u want an german domain but its already taken? I want to expand my business to germany and the domain i want is spelled in german. Would an <englishtranslation>.de also work? That one is free.

the german spelled one.com is free, would .com be good?

I'm struggling between .de and .com.

Any suggestions would be fine too.


Thx in advance biz
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>>1544927
.com is king
but I'm not familiar with German customers specifically so ask it on some german SEO forums
>>
I'd say .de is the better choice even if you use the english word
>>
>>1544931
That's what I thought as well.

Ye me neither so was hoping to find some germans here. I'l search for some german SEO forums, thanks.

>>1544933
Okay, any reason why?

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How can I get more Yewtube views
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have big tits
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>>1544845
>>
>>1544842
Network with facebook pages.

I don't mean make one, I mean make friends with an admin on one and have them shill for you. A big one.

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Alright biz, I need your advice.
I live in a really poor, post-communist country.
Grew up really poor. My family doesnt own a house, nor a car nor anything like that. My mom barely makes enough to pay the bills.
I just got out of highschool and I was supposed to go to Uni to pursue some meme degree but i gave up on that shit, because I want to go study abroad.

Now the problem is, I dont have any money to pay for my livig costs when I go study.
Im working a 9-5 that pays about 250$ a month (about average salary in this shithole of a country).
I cant start...
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study abrooad and get a part time job to fund your lifestyle
>>
>>1544833
Same here, but I don't want to leave my city
Actually I really like it, only if I could earn a little money independently...

Isn't life wonderful?!
>>
>>1544833
Get a gun and stand up to the mafia

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how come im not getting a hit? looking for an entry level job in aus? last time i was here they said to shorten the criteria which i have
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>>1544814
nothing that makes me go

"this kid must be smart"
"this kid is very active in the community"
"this kid really improved the last company, i hope he can do something similar for ours"

It just looks like a kids that worked in menial jobs from high school to his mid 20's and hasn't actually accomplished anything other than mediocrity.
>>
>>1544814
chuck on your GPA, did you do any kind of external projects like clubs or something.

It just looks like crap. No finished in top 10% of class, no Distinction average, no 3.7 GPA, no first in chess championship idk, no sporting achievement/uni games,
>>
>>1544814

You need more than one simple bullet point to explain what you did on the job. Also, remove the casual thing because no one wants you to work 2 jobs if they hire you. Expound on your degree. Add projects, classes, clubs ect. Your resume looks like you did it as a school assignment and got a C on it. Doesn't look like you actually have drive to get a job. Gl

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So, /biz/
Im looking to get into binary options so I have some questions.
Is it as lucrative as people say it its? Is it just essentialy gambling?
What's the best platform.
Any opinions appreciated really.
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>>1544806
Dont
>>
>>1544806

This is as SFW board. Delete your image.

If you're considering Binary options, repare your anus. It's a scam. You might as well transfer your funds to the brokers private account.
>>
>>1544806
Binary options are structured so that when you lose, the broker wins. You need a win rate of 55-65+ just to stay afloat. This has created an incredibly scam riddled industry. Try something else, anon, this is a scam

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What types of things should I say to the quack to get pills?
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Tell them you have difficulty focusing that you've had since you were a child and it's negatively affecting your school/work.

Also make sure to ask about getting checked for mental retardation
>>
>>1544805
*prescribed

see why I need this stuff?
>>
>>1544807
Thanks bro. If u are a millionaire like most on biz I can be your in home tard jester for room, and board?

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Should I invest $1k into AMRN?

Any good stocks I should own? Like right now would be a good time to get in?
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No. This is some no-name penny stock that is probably a pump and dump. If you're buying something for longer term, you would want to buy something you are familiar with that you think will be in a better position in the future. You generally want to buy when a stock is low (the opposite of this graph).

Also go to sec.gov and look up the form 10-k of any company you think would be good. It shows all financial information of all publicly traded companies.
>>
trade paper and learn to research stocks before investing in anything riskier than a popular index fund
>>
>>1544877

>pump and dump
>literally had a 28 page buy rating

If you actually researched AMRN you would know it is a legit stock with a product that has a script that is rising weekly. I think Mathew is a sign the FDA is going to give Amarin a label change, Anchor and 4 extra years exclusivity.

but Yes be a good goy OP and buy 5 shares of Disney and 10 shares of Coca Cola for $1k OP, maybe you will see a 1/10th profit within 3-5 years

Why do governments run deficits with impunity?
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>>1544796
Why is south italy even considered 1st world?
>>
>>1544796
Because the guy who promises the most generally wins.

Who cares if future generations have to pay it off? Not the simple-minded plebs' concern!
>>
>>1544796
They either don't levy enough taxes for their expenses
Or they spend too much for the amount of taxes they're levying.

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Best products to buy from China and resell?

I'm thinking phone accessories is a no-brainer due to being cheap,lightweight which means little shipping costs and being in high demand , but what other products are cheap and easy to sell?

Anyone on here had any success Importing from China?
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>>1544767
No and you should kill yourself
>>
>>1544771
Okay, i'll just buy some $URRE$

Thanks for your advice
>>
>>1544767
Not sure how viable it would be, but you could look at products through providers like Wish, although it's difficult to order in bulk in terms of shipping.
Where are you planning to turn these around anyway?

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>start a few affiliate marketing blogs
>they all get respectable amounts of traffic every day
>about 90% of the traffic only views the front page
>still haven't got a single sale
What can I do to make them view the actual posts I make?
I tried putting videos on the front page as well but they get no views at all.
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>>1544731
>about 90% of the traffic only views the front page
>What can I do to make them view the actual posts I make?

Put your posts on the front page
>>
>>1544764
What if people only visit his front page because its blog free and it ends up like the rest of the pages?
>>
>>1544731
are they bots OP?

I've been 15-25 minutes late for work everyday for months now. Was 2.5 hours late a couple weeks ago. I've had a few written and verbal warnings from my manager, is this grounds for getting fired?
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Yes, especially since you've had warnings.
>>
>>1544723
Indeed, do it like me, get at work in time and close yourself in the bathroom for 30 minutes saying you got cronic stomacache, no one will bother you. You can also trade forex while you make farting sounds with your mouth
>>
Why are you so damn late all the time. Once every three months is acceptable because shit happens but there's no need to be this late constantly.

You must be the only one who can do your job there but let me tell you a thing. They're actively looking for a replacement and once they find one, your ass is grass.


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