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Archived threads in /biz/ - Business & Finance - 38. page
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>majoring in Stats
>applied to 30+ internships
>0 offers

Welp, I have a 4.00 gpa and all. Maybe I'll go to Grad School if I fall in the unemployment gap I guess.
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>>1635395
Get into data science. You won't regret it; $100k straight outta school.
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>>1635409
Also, if you're a good data scientist, landing $250k-$300k should be possible within some years in the business.
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>>1635409
how do i do that?

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i need to call to book an appointment for an electrical apprenticeship. Help me please. I always fuck interviews up especially phone ones. What will the ask? can you give me a script?

I know they'll ask me right off the bat why I'm interested in becoming an electrician and why work for them. Especially why they would want me over anyone else. IM 18 so I don't know what the literal fuck to say.
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Seriously no replies?
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Just apply for another one if you fuck it up. If you don't know why you want to be an electrician then maybe you should pursue a career in something you're interested in.
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>>1635540
fuck you i just want the money holyshit

Who here works in private banking / wealth management / Fund managing?

What is the best path into this branch of finance? i am currently finishing my bachelors in finance and accounting, and secured an internship at a very large bank in the wealth management department. When they asked me in the interview what my future plans are, i told them I was going to take the first CFA exam. truth is i have no clue and i havent even registered for the cfa program.

What would you advise a beginner like me to do? what masters to do? should i even do masters? work part time...
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>>1635301
working in wealth management for SYZ and some experience with CS, what job are they hiring you to do? Client Relationship management or analytics or what?
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>>1635301
My grandpa worked there. I still have all the access visitor key cards I would steal
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>>1635307
they told me i am going to do both, work with clients and do analytical stuff. but im just an intern, im assuming i will be the office bitch. The internship has not started yet, ive got no clue what im in for to be honest.

how did you start working for SYZ? do you live in switzerland? its my life goal to work in zurich, i love that city and the country in general.

Are the days of calling an IT guy to come fix something of yours that is broken, gone?

What are some ways to keep up with the change in this realm?

-pic somewhat related
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pls
>>
I could make a warranty call to IBM right now and they'd send a contractor out the next day to fix my laptop in front of me.
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>>1635275
No, technology is always on the razors edge and constantly changing. There will always be stupid people who can't figure out PCs or just can't be bothered to keep up with the changing trends. IT isn't going away anytime soon, why do narrow minded cucks keep stepping up and saying this?

In fact I think most children growing up now have experienced such locked down mobile and computer devices that they will be MORE helpless than baby-boomers for even basic computer needs.

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When did you realize life is a scam?

Government - doesn't care, just wants power and the members of it want control and money

Mr. Shekelburg - your boss. Doesn't care if you die tomorrow from cancer, all that's important is the profit you bring him

Doctors - just care about fulfilling their own sense of worth and making a lot of money

Friends - don't care about you. Just want emotional support or other benefits from your friendship.

Parents - only care about who's going to take care of them when they're old and...
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stop blaming others for things that are wrong in your life. also if you are really interested in moral, read Beyond Good and Evil from Nietzsche
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>>>/r9k/

Stop whining and fuck off.
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>>1635200
>Parents - only care about who's going to take care of them when they're old and passing on their genes

Oh shit lad you got problems pretty sure your parents would jump in front of a car to save you, if thats programmed in to us sure whatever but they would give their life to save yours.

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What are unsolved problems?
What do the people really want?
Where is the industry going?
Discuss.
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>>1635191
tort reform and mandatory insurance.
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>>1635194
I guess you're talking about the US market. I aim at a general discussion or the global market and would like to include the desires of the people. Also: why has InsurTech no place in your response?
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>>1635197
>would like to include the desires of the people
the people want to not have insurance while treating other people's insurance like a lottery pay out. That doesn't work well so what they really want is tort reform and mandatory insurance.
>why has InsurTech no place in your response?
because I believe it's possible to have too much competition in a sector to the point where everybody doing business is worse off. I suspect the future...
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I have a friend who lives in Japan, what would be a good product that I could get from Japan and sell in the US for profit? I also will be getting a job there from my friend's company when I graduate from university.
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Onaholes and body pillows
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Sell weeb shit, especially limited edition stuff. Pic-related was released in Japan during the summer for 4500 yen (about $40). Now people are selling them on Ebay for $90-$100.
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>>1635702
>>1635199

This, cater to weebs. Sell japanese soft drinks. Weebs love the ones with the fucking stone in it. No idea what it's called.

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My uncle is going to give me $100 USD on Dec. 1. The bet is that I can't make that multiply to $1000 by April 1. If I can, he gives me another $100, and if I can't, I owe him $300.
The only rule is that the money I earn has to be a direct result of the original 100. I can't add money I get from working a job because it's supposed to be a lesson on spending money to make money. Does anyone have any ideas on how to x10 my money in 3 months?
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>>1635170
step 1- buy axe and a wagon
step 2- chop trees- pine, spruce
step 3- sell it to rich yuppies with wood burning fireplaces
>step 4- make that thousand

git to er op. And No in advance, "im too lazy to do that" is not a fucking excuse" your uncle wants to see your gumption.
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>>1635170
flip shit.
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>>1635173
this

or buy snow shovel, shovel 20 walks. buy snowblower, keep right on clearing walks and driveways. buy plow truck, become the plow king.

or buy a vacuum and clean people's houses.
or window washing rig, or pressure washer, or tools to change oil, or whatever.

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>too intelligent to be a wagecuck
>too dumb to start a buziness
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>Middle management
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>>1635158
>too autistic to be management
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>>1635154
To me it sounds like you're too retarded to be a wagecuck.

/biz/ please come educate these dumb ass people here

>>>/v/358676336
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>>1635114
There's no hope in educating /v/
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I really don't wanna go back there and talk about basic income.
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>>1635145
Whats your opinion on basic income, just to be curious

Hey /biz/, this is kind of a weird question but I don't know where else I could ask it. I want to know how much a piece of wooded land is worth. The land is in upstate NY and borders my house. Its in a nice town, however its undeveloped due to the fact that its entirely bedrock. The entirety of the land at most has 2-3 inches of topsoil until you hit bedrock making building houses on it impossible. The land is approximately 300 acres and its only notable feature is a small abandoned rock quarry used in the creation of the Erie Canal. The current owner (which I dont even know who it is, its definitely private property though) has never done anything with it and I walk it regularly and have never seen a soul.

What would be the value of this land?
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>building houses impossible


sounds pretty worthless.

lumber?

then use it for grazing? i dunno bub.
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>>1635105
Its literally in the middle of a village, no way its gonna be useful for farmland or lumber, local government would never have it
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>>1635108
grazing and farming are diff.

if u can get some pimp sheep . they eat grass and u can shear them and sell the wool as a commodity.
ewe can even use the meat if u want.
and goats milk.
and they breed themselves and mow the lawn 4 u.

also horses. stables

just throwing out some ideas.

also . you'd be suprised what the governemnts into.


it would be more of a housing authority that you would have to worry about if you were by certain neighborhoods.

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How do I show off money
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>buy some playmoney
>spread it on the table
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by paying people large sums of money to suck their dicks
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Paying me 500/hr to fuck you in the ass like the dirty faggot you are.

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What 2 do if your parents are poorfags with poor financial decision-making?

>Keep telling me about the newest MLM and cryptocurrency and all this shit
>They keep telling me I should drop my Accounting major and just join Amway because they heard some people are making 6-figures doing it
>Keep nagging me about getting a job and moving out and doing chores which further lowers my testosterone via cortisol
>think "drumpf should've lost he didn't...
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>>1634896
Start saving as much as possible, work 2 jobs so you don't have to be home as much. Move out, or attend a college and live on campus/with roommates so you can get cheaper rent
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You don't need a gf. You don't need your parents. What you need is to move the fuck out, find an apartment with 6 roommates. Split hummus. Make a shit ton of dough doing something that'll pay.
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>>1634904
I'm studying accounting though

I want to maintain my gpa though. You might be right about filling up my time by working though.

>>1634906
I'm studying right now man. Kind of do need my parents...

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What are /biz/'s thoughts?

Is it worth getting done for us fellas who have bad eye sight?

On one hand it might be worthwhile to wait a little longer for technology to improve/price to fall but on the otherhand id be missing out on valuable quality of life.

Feels to me like even $5000 over a 20 year period is very worth it, given how much we spend on glasses/contacts, not to mention the invaluable quality of life of having PERIPHERAL vision and not having glasses mess with your look and feel of life.

Thoughts?
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>>1634892
I'd wait. Apparently it ruins your night vision. Makes you have blurry halos. Never see stars in the night sky the same way.
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>>1634946
this, unless you DESPERATELY need eye surgery id just get used to shitty vision plus glasses and contacts
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>>1634946
[Citation kindly requested]

My vision is absolute shit man. And I'm fucking tired of glasses.

I just fucked up another pair yesterday because I fell asleep with them on and rolled over midsleep and bent the fuck out of them.

Honestly considering it because nearly everyone I've heard from said it's fantastic

My vision is so bad I can't see shit a couple feet away without it being blurry as fuck

Ok so i want to invest i stocks. Im fairly new but ive done tons of research and i think im ready to start on a small scale with something dependable like walmart.
But heres the problem i dont meet the age requirement for all the online trading sites.
So my question is how badly will the IRS ream my asshole if they find out im trading and not paying the 15 percent on all profits and other taxes and im not of age?
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Irs dont give a shit. But no walmart. Try $JNUG (highest was 800 they're at 8 right now) or Tyson, they are quite expensive but took a dip due to bad earnings/fraud (case has no merit, stock will go back up at perhaps record high when case is dropped)

Look up JNUG on /r/wallstreetbets and you'll see why it's good shit. Wal mart is a retarded idea, you should feel bad. Gamestop is alright for beginners because it'll go up due to holidays. They go up even not during the holidays somehow. Tesla if you have the money. Try options.
>durr...
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>>1634851
Thnx for the tips m8
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Are you under the age of majority? If so the SEC and broker would care.

My last one of these threads was a big hit so I'm back for more. I give advice about patents for a living, ask me questions and I will give you advice.

US only.
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>>1634803
How do I patent my meme?
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>>1634812
You can't but you could copyright it though.
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>>1634803
have patents every worked for the small business / little guy?

how much patent fraud/deception/subterfuge do the big dogs get away with, crushing the little guys?

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I have very few employable skills
how do I capitalise on this?
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capitalize
ˈkapJt(ə)lʌJz
verb
verb: capitalise
1.
take the chance to gain advantage from.

>How do I take advantage of having no skills
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>>1634785
By learning some skills.
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>>1634785
neet bucks

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>just recently got interested in investing and stocks
>today I finally downloaded robinhood and put down $5 just to fuck around with penny stocks
>turns out everything is frozen due to the holiday and won't be open until tomorrow

perfect day to get involved in something I suppose
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>>1634743
Treat it like a casino and throw $100 on there, and get ready to panic at 1/4 penny shifts
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>>1634749
if only I wasn't on minimum wage and have all of my money put towards bills and Christmas presents.
>maybe after tax returns though
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>>1634752
>>maybe after tax returns though
just throw a couple bucks in there every week.
eventually you will grow it pretty big and not even really notice how much you have put in there

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I've decided not to celebrate Christmas this year, and to instead donate $750 between some charities. I found some well known charities I am considering:
http://www.amfar.org/
http://www.guidedog.org/
http://www.redcross.org/

However, are there others you recommend for the purpose of funding research? I'd especially like reliable ones funding AIDS, cancer, and stem cell research. I'd also appreciate comments on the above three charities, and any tips on using the donations as write offs (I'm a sole proprietor).
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Personally wouldn't donate to those types, they already get enough money and the CEO's earn way to much.

If you like internet freedom have a look at the EFF https://www.eff.org
>>
wikileaks
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>>1634728
aspca
spca

dont donate to charities who pay like .10 cents of the dollar to their cause.

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how do I be an art collector. every auction I see is a bunch of literally who artists, I want a picasso
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>>1634696
Picasso are worth millions you fucking idiot.

That's why you buy the who's... if you spend 1k on a literally-who artist but 12 months later his work triples in value, congratulations, 300% investment increase for small outlay.

Good luck getting that return after plonking down 10 million on a Picasso

Besides Picasso's aren't even the most expensive works: Pollack, Sherman, Hirst... learn these names you fucking lazy shit. Many of them are still alive.
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>>1634696
I have a few cheap Picassos from the renaissance period. Cheap because owner is desperate for money.
If you want some top quality paintings contact me at
Realoriginalpaintings@totallylegitbusiness.za
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>>1634703
My cousin can draw better than Pollack. And with my cousin, I know for a fact there's no jizz in those paintings.

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>Mom is a surgeon
>Dad is a rocket scientist
>Their best advice is to get a job if I want money.
>Seriously faggots? even /biz/ can give better advice than that.
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>>1634542
Excellent advice from your parents. They make enough money to raise and support a family. Most people here without work probably couldn't afford that with their schemes.
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>>1634542
Typical wageslave indoctrinated parents, just build a buisness bro. Invest in cryptos, day trade on robinhood
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>>1634542
Take something you really enjoy and are good at, and then monetize it. Sell a product or service. Be your own boss. Starting an LLC doesn't cost too much. Separate your personal assets from your business, and then slowly grow and build it. You can do it.

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Now that Reddit is about to go down the shitter, what should I invest in?
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What's going on? Elaborate over this drama. All I know is a bunch of faggots from the_donald are pissed that the sub is about to get the axe.
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>>1634553
The admin edited people's comments and admitted to it. Now people are skeptical of what other comments were edited without user knowledge.

This is a serious concern because people's posts can be modified to contain illegal things and get them in trouble(obviously).
>>
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>>1634553
Logs got leaked about admins planning to ban the subreddit, they quote the Ceo by name and tell him to fuck off, but then he manipulates their posts to change his name to that of the Donald's mods

Why is Hiro not liable for CP or illegal material posted here? It is property of the poster. When the reddit CEO changed the content of other people's posts, their company are now liable for any material posted there.

Tl;dr Reddit is going down, what should I invest in?

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How do we profit off of the automation boom, how do we establish ourselves in the neo upperclass, and seperate ourselves from the depth grovellers toiling for neoplasmin
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>>1634505
invent the machines that will do the work. Invest in companies that manufacture machines to do factory work.
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>>1634576

This. If you aren't in tech maybe working to help automate and maintain automations then I'd recommend entertainment. People will have a lot of free time and will look for something to occupy it with. Personally I'm doing youtube product reviews and getting 50k views per weekly vid I up. It's not a lot yet but definitely hope to build it up and cash in on the new economy.
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Buy Alphabet and you'll find yourself living in the vast pleasure-domes in no time. You won't even have to participate in the trash economy.

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who keeps the profits a company makes? i was looking at the net worths of some of the billionaires and most of it is just from their stake in their company.
I know it's common to reinvest profits back into the company but what about what's left or is every penny reinvested?
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>>1634472
Every everybody within the company, as an employee is paid by means of salary, and after the shareholders get their quarterly dividend payments, then whatever left over is either used to pay debts, or is reinvested in to the company, or can be held as cash reserves.
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>>1634472
if you own controlling share of company and you keep money in the company and you believe in the company((s)valuation) , than you are making better return on your money than keeping it in your bank account.
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>>1634545
I think OP is asking who owns the money left after all of that (cash reserves)

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How do you guys flex on plebs? That's the best part of being rich
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>>1634414
That fake money.

ISHYGDDT
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>>1634500
Nah, it's probably real, niggers don't use banks, even the wealthy ones so debt collectors or police can't sieze it.
I'm guessing this dude is some kind of rapper/basketballer/drug dealer, so ~$1kk net worth seems reasonable.
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>>1634414
You don't; it only makes you stand out, and be a target.

Fit in with everyone else, just make your life a bit more comfortable. If you want to splurge, do it somewhere away from where people you know live, or do it in a way that lets them think that you've been saving up for a long time to do it.

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Had some interesting discussions the last time I did this and I have nothing better to do on a day off, so here we go.

I am a relatively young quantitative researcher at a hedge fund, AMA.
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>>1634375

Why are you lying on the internet?
>>
Why'd you post an image of a black box?
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>>1634377
Not lying. Just trying to kill some time while waiting for Thanksgiving dinner.

>>1634379
Because many people erroneously view systematic investing as a black box.

Stole the picture from a recent Bloomberg article about Renaissance, arguably the most successful and secretive quant hedge fund out there. If you're interested: https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-11-21/how-renaissance-s-medallion-fund-became-finance-s-blackest-box

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What would happen if the proletariat rise up against the Capitalists? And how do I profit from this?
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You take whats yours comrade
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>>1634357

The proletariat would be slaughtered by the capitalist controlled army.
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>>1634357
You don't the ruling party will. Then you will give up everything just to work and not go to jail for being a lazy fuck

If EMH is true. How does anyone make money?
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Great question.

1) There will always be some inefficiences.

2) Human capital. (This is labor, etc.)
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>>1634337
>EMH
Is that the Emergency Medical Hologram?
Or is it Early Morning Hardness?
>>
>>1634337
It's not, and they would not, except by random chance.

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What are the profit margins for selling homemade fireworks? Mostly stuff like smoke bombs, firecrackers and fountains.
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>>1634241
Probably not much because a lot of fireworks are illegal, and the ones that are legal are easily accessible through the kiosks they have around 4th of July. How are you going to advertise?
>>
Why would anyone, ever buy homemade explosive devices?

Seems like a great way to blow your fingers off.
>>
>>1634245
I'd go through word of mouth. since it's kinda niche I'd find a base of frequent buyers.

Who else is not falling for the consumerism meme?
It honestly disgusts me the things people will do for $50 off a tv.
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>>1634137
I dont even think its the discounts are all that great. Its the MANIA behind it. You're part of a crowd of hundreds of people, if you shove someone down and take their TV in a store so YOU can have it, management doesnt have time to deal with it, because theres too many people doing too many things. Same with rioting/protesting. "They cant deal with ALL of us, lol!"
>>
Agree. I don't participate
>>
I usually go with my m8 and steal shit tons of games since they're not behind glass that day can't wait


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