Post the worst videos you have
Starting with the Knorr® stockpot salesman:
>expecting Americans not to butcher foreign cuisine as a matter of course
This is what Americans think enchiladas are
What triggers me the most is that she doesn't even have the fucking brain to spread the ingredients as she's pouring them. She just pours them all into the same fucking spot
i'd probably enjoy this.
i like really soggy corn tortillas. simmered in sauce for a long-period.
but i suspect the fried chips would get waaay too soggy. they'd dissolve into nothingness.
>We track down Karmanaut and force him to cook us bacon at narwhal point.
Eh, it's not that bad.
The guy actually makes sense, particularly when he says something to the effect of:
>It's not about whether its authentic, I only care that it tastes good
Doesn't that make sense, though?
The stock cube would add about the right amount of salt to season the pasta, plus the meat flavors.
Seems like a smart idea, actually. IIRC, most asian noodle bowls are cooked and served in stock.
I know, I don't like that talking to someone off camera thing
But tbh he's such a creepy intense fucker that it would be seriously disconcerting if he was staring right into the camera
Carbonara really doesn't need any chicken stock flavour, it's completely inappropriate.
And rubbing rich beef stock onto steak will just ruin its flavour. All you need is salt and pepper and maybe a bit of butter and thyme in the pan. Even a cheap cut will taste really good this way.
It's also weird how he doesn't salt the meat before he puts it in the pan. This is literally cooking 101 stuff: you're not going to get a good sear unless you salt your meat well before cooking it. He leaves this stage out because the salt comes from the stock that he puts on afterwards. It's a really obvious case of being paid to shill something.
Things like this are what make me embarrassed to be an american sometimes
> implying Bayless isnt Based status
> implying he didnt go traveling mexico to study ALL forms of mezican cuisine
> implying I dont want to suck his dick to absorb his cooking skills
> implying implications implies imply
Did she put olives on top of the sour cream? What the fuck? Since when are olives even remotely Mexican?
If anyone hasn't seen Ja/ck/ before, they are not ready for this recipe.
Fun fact, while he's putting that in, he actually says "I don't recommend using imitation because it has a different reaction. You should use real cool whip. If you don't have cool whip just use real whipped cream."
This is a classic . . ..
>she literally ruins a perfectly good sandwich with meme sauce
I swear to fucking god.
When I was a kid there was nothing better than a plain old peanutbutter and jelly sandwich with cheap peanutbutter and jelly and white bread.
I don't need to be told by some squinty, blown out, smoked out whore that my childhood pb&j sandwiches were "wrong". Especially when she advocates putting pure mimetic extract in a bottle on it, yuk!
Seriously. The only possible advice to making a better PB&J is to divide the amount of peanut you intend to use into two portions for either slice of bread and then nest the jelly on top so the buttered slices stick to each other and create a good seal to prevent jelly drips.
>posting MPW selloutery
>only showing the entirely innocuous examples
this, this is where marco really definitively sold out. there is no fucking way even a home cook with a passion for food, let alone a starred chef, would sincerely recommend this as a recipe and put 'jamaican' in the title. it is an act of total self-denial in the pursuit of easy money. it solely exists in this form because knorr stock pots are meant to be convenient and a recipe with a more than single figure list of ingredients undermines that selling point. whoever decided to present this recipe is wilfully painting the target demographic as lazy idiots. he hates you and doesn't even credit you with the ability to recognise it. what a fucking legend.
I grew up out in the country. Specifically, dairy country. Knew a lot of good, hardworking people that lived on those dairy farms. Feels bad to me that their dues or whatever it is is being used to fund these commercials.
Marco is a barrel of laughs in general. He's so pretentious it makes his videos paradoxically really fun to watch. I bust a gut at this one earlier today:
koreans are the worst at this, they put fucking corn on their pizzas
Can you also point out the flaws in this carbonara video anon?
Someone here DID make it. It ended up being about as good as everyone thought it would be.
I don't know any of the archive sites off the top of my head, but that thread is probably on one of them.
Oh, in the actual video it's "Aunt Myrna's" recipe, and he does at least acknowledge how horrifying that combination of ingredients is. Even for the sake of humouring your elderly relative though, is it worth it?
Please someone post that video where a hambeast couple is making spaghetti (or something with tomato sauce) and the wife lets rip the wettest fucking fart ever.
I've only ever seen it once.
dude, I work for a bistro that is not rated at all in a flyover state in the us
we breakdown our animals, and use the bones and bits to make our soup bases, stocks, sauces etc.
I'm not convinced a 3 star chef wouldn't be doing similar things to that. If I was chef I wouldn't fuck with store bought shit, as it'd probably make it much harder to get the flavor I imagine for whatever dish
Kit Kat lasagna. The original video I think was taken down because of the backlash but this woman did a voiceover of it and it's kinda funny.
Holy shit this is the first time I've actually physically cringed. I was scared she was gonna cut her fingers off. You could clearly see that her fingers were under the blade of the knife as she was banging it. What the fuck is wrong with people. Not to mention it probably absolutely destroyed her knife.
my best advice to improve a good pbj is to butter the bread before you put peanut butter on it and add a bit of salt too since brands never have enough salt, and even then I'd let a retard make me a pbj because its a fool proof sandwich. What kind of sick cunt adds curry powder and sirracha to a pbj and has the audacity to tell me im making it wrong?
Gotta be healthy with a BMI of 50
>the second she put on the siracha
My god is this person human?
>Consume is clear rich soup traditionally made with beef or chicken but you can make it with just about anything
NO. No you can't.
She didn't even make an egg raft.
>all that cheese
Jesus Christ you take one bite and are constipated for a week.
>I don't see any seasoning
.. oh god
and I've seen that "meat" mentioned and used before, it's not goddamn steak that's for sure
holy fucking shit and it's feeding that garbage to a child.. and it adds fucking steak sauce as well for triple dose of salt
>Whole package of cheese blended in
>Add another package on top of it.
Not enough cheese.
It needs another can to top it off.
The quality of that household is exemplified by them all grinding their teeth on the cutlery and chewing with their mouths open like they're fucking oysters.
Jesus wept, close your lips you slack faced sponge people.
>smallest "corn" tortillas ever
>using an iron to cook while in your own fucking kitchen
>easy recipe, have your kids do it
>still manages to fuck it up
>don't redo the video, it's fine, post it
Sweetcorn on pizza is pretty dope though. You shouldn't have as much on the pizza as they put in that picture, but its a perfectly valid topping for a pizza when mixed with other shit.
>mfw you can hear the crunch when he bites into it
>lemon jello package
>cream cheese (eww wtf is happening?)
>chopped fucking CELERY?
>PIMENTO????? fucking what the fuck is happening?
>fucking pecans because why not?
>FUCKING COOL WHIP jammed into this unholy concoction of fucking random shit that is on the stove for no reason, what is he doing just heating it?
>ugh that sickening splattering sound as he pours it into the pan
>sprinkle with cheese because sure, fuck it man
>chill as long as you can resist this magnificent... dessert?
>flop a cube of it onto a plate and just eat with a fork?
I've never in my life seen this video in all my jack watching that has ruined my fucking youtube recommends but jesus christ, JESUS. CHRIST.
This is easily the most horrendous and nonsensical jack shit I've seen from him to date, what the holy fuck?
I don't know what this actually is, but it isn't cheesecake.
I suppose it is edible, but probably really sweet, I mean did you see how much powdered sugar he put in that wet mixture?
I couldn't help myself. I have a problem.
I need help. I want to make a webm of the Belashi video where there's a fly in his mixture and I need an appropriate panic reaction, preferably in the form of a youtube video so I don't need to fuck around with resolutions. Any suggestions?
Anon, seeing as I'm a lesbian, and I've never even touched a dick, I'm pretty sure I never miscarried.
Clots are pretty normal, actually. Most women have them. I'm just saying that the thinness of the steak, along with the stringy bits, and the blobby movement when she put them on the "grill" reminded me of them, and it was disgusting.
Why is her carbonara so fucked up when her Pinoy food looks ok and uses proper ingredients?
And what's up with serving in tupper ware? Is that common in third world shitholes? Is stoneware that much more expensive?
Goddamn, the recipe was fine for the first two ingredients. It'd be more edible if he substituted the vegetables with fruits (maybe apples, grapes, berries, depending on your preference), swap the cream cheese with ricotta (or no cheese at all!), and replaced the shredded cheese with chocolate shavings. It could easily be a good, fruity dessert if you tried harder in the recipe.
But that's just my opinion.
>slurp down some 'betus there fatty.
I lold at that. But yeah she just comes across as a massive bitch. Not nearly as disgusting as those fatties though. It would be interesting to use some sort of happiness radar and see which one is happier. The raging angry cunt face or the gluttonous eating away the pain fatties.
only people who have no working immune system or AIDS, like you, should be worried about something like this
the immune system exists for a reason and this kind of shit keeps it active and even strengthens it
HAHAHAHAHA nigger what is wrong with you?