How have you improved yourself this week/month/year? Lifting isn't life, a well-balanced human being is productive, has hobbies, pushes him/herself to succeed, is charismatic, and strives to live the best life they can. Share your successes, failures, methods, and everything in between.
The sticky is divided like so:
>Some tips to get your life back on track.
>Study and Career.
>To-do list habit.rpg (If you’re TOTALLY Lost. Start with this one)
>Focus and meditation
>Have a productivity Framework that is flexible. A mindset that gets you going.
>Use a calendar, like google calendar. Hours and shit for things YOU WILL DO.
>Learn to focus.
>Do routines for things you should do periodically/daily, this should cover daily things or weekly chores such as laundry, cleaning, shopping.
>Identify and Eliminate conflicts within yourself.
>Focus on identifying the time wasters in your life and eliminate them.
>Focus on the essentials. If you try to do everything at once you’ll burnout. Little by little.
>This is a good ‘sticky’ for self-development
>This one is a good blog for resources of this kind. I’ve seen annons give good feedback.
http://youtu.be/b-a1jXgAsQI [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/3Ao7rZ8-HWo [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/iG9CE55wbtY [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/ZtMm0swu5i8 [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/vH0nP4NzS9M [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/WxOFvpplvAM [Embed] [Embed]
http://youtu.be/ix4xSzkqwhk [Embed] [Embed]
>If you think there is material that should be added (Or taken off). Please say so.
>There is no central authority for the /SIG/, everyone could copy, modify and upload the info here in a latter post.
>To future curators of the /SIG/. Stray away from PUA, and avoid Fedora stuff please.
>If you try monetizing with this, I’ll cut you.
Material reading can be tricky. There will be trash here and there as we're not /lit/.
But we have to trust others.
Image related has a detailed list that an Annon provided on a thread a while back. If you got time to kill, click on the image, and read the descriptions
As time goes, the /SIG/ has had a couple of books recommended. I’ve done my best to try to get talks of the authors of such books so you can get a ‘piece’ before you commit.
Google a bit about the book, if you think you can get something out of it, watch the talk.
In my opinion, try getting the books “for free”.
If you read it and get something out of it, consider paying for the book.
>Michael Mauboussin, "The Success Equation”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JLfqBsX5Lc [Embed] [Embed]
>Susan Cain, Quiet: The power of Introverts
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c0KYU2j0TM4 [Embed] [Embed]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=85s9wJlzkrk [Embed] [Embed]
>The Brain That Changes Itself, Norman Doidge
>Antifragile, Nassim Taleb
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4MhC5tcEv0 [Embed] [Embed]
>One Small Step Can Change Your Life: The Kaizen Way, Robert Maurer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWUDV6xJRPc [Embed] [Embed]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMQb5FJrop8 [Embed] [Embed]
>Mentally Tough, James E. Loehr & Peter J. McLaughlin
>Practicing the Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle
Reading material needs to be added/edited
Some free books for you to grab
The Way of The Seal
The Code of the Warrior - Rick Fields
The Story of Civilization - Will Durant
The Story of Philosophy - WIll Durant
Starship Troopers - Robert Heinlein 1959 (actually has a lot of really powerful character building stuff in there)
Bravo Two Zero - Andy McNab
Immediate Action - ^
Seven Troop - ^
Also, Project Gutenberg has Thousands of free books.
You could do lot worse than browsing their top 100
>Freedom is having control of your life
You should at least have 3 hobbies/activities.
-One that will pay the bills, gets food on your table
-One that will keep you in shape. (lower you faggot)
-One that you're passionate about and might be able to develop into a career.
If you're into lifting, taking the tips to better yourself should be simple; as you already have built some self-discipline.
Make peace with yourself and the way things are right now.
Stop thinking the world owes you, how destiny ‘fucked you over’, how those guys have it easier.
Accept things as they are, realize that life is cruel and your circumstances are the ones you were given. You can’t do shit about the starting point, but you can move forward.
Don’t focus in what was given to you, focus in what you’ll achieve.
Eliminate the things you dislike about yourself, about your life. Is as simple as, do you enjoy your job? No? Take steps to change the feeling.
How are you gonna make that? You either make your job more enjoyable, or you change jobs. Simple.
You want a girl? how do you plan to achieve that? Are you too socially inept? Work on that.
Are you piss poor and can’t afford a decent living? Work on that too.
No matter who you are, where you are in your life, or how fucked up you think you are.
You can improve your life. Take control. Move forward.
Dreams keeps us alive, fighting for them makes us feel alive.
About 5-7 years ago, I was a fucking train-wreck.
Right now, I'm doing fairly well.
Get some discipline, set some goals and a way to achieve them.
Cultivate yourself, learn stuff, get your shit together.
And realize, understand. None is coming to save you.
You got to make your way through.
You NEED to take CONTROL.
If you're still in School. For fuck sake pay attention.
MORE than half of actually doing good in school is attending, the other half is paying attention in class. So then do it.
Or stop it altogether.
If you’re in college and you’re not feeling it, take a semester to think things through.
If you’re in high school, don’t think YOU NEED to enter college to be successful. There are other way
Google just started hiring people who never went to college.
WATCH this talk:
http://youtu.be/iG9CE55wbtY [Embed] [Embed]
Some learning resources, focusing in code since I’m an ‘IT’ guy:
First and foremost. Free language learning tool with a really robust app. THIS IS A MUST. Learning a new language will help you out no matter who you are.
Teaches you the basics, from the ground up.
Similar to codeacademy.
Personal favorite. This guy step by step, learns a shit-ton of programing languages. Give this a check and start watching something you’re interested in.
This one I really like, once you get your shit going, it puts you ‘objectives’ to solve through code, last batch are really complex.
It’s a really nice online-course platform. There are really good things here as well.
>openprocessing.org / processing.org / codepen.io
These sites display some really cool stuff, where you can also check the source code and modify it to see what happens.
For career options.
Choose anything you want, If you want to go into Philosophy or Social studies, That's fucking great. As long as you’re passionate about it, you’ll find a way.
You can always become a teacher or a writer.
BUT BE FUCKING AWARE THAT YOU WILL HAVE A HARD TIME MAKING MONEY. Don't get a loan to study shit that will be expensive to repay.
Other than that, don't enter into something soulless just because 'I'll get money'.
You only got one fucking life, don’t waste it doing something you hate.
You must have a to-do list, it's pretty essential.
As for which, there are several options
Google Keep, Evernote or whatever suits you.
But currently I suggest you use:
There’s even a /fit/ guild created to keep us in check.
It’s certainly geeky as fuck. But Gamification has been proven to work when applied to certain aspects of human psyche. Helps you stay in check and keeping your eyes on the trophy.
Stupid trivial things I used to do, I stopped once I placed them as ‘Bad habits’.
It also has a mobile app, while it’s a bit limited and on construction, it is free.
There are three main categories.
>Habits. These are things you do by impulse, not under a schedule. Can be good or bad.
+Go for a jog
+Sleep early/on time Sun-Thu
+Walk the dog
+Go for a ride
+Cook something new
+Go out and socialize
+Spend time at the shelter
-Eat Junk/Dirty bulk
-Stay up late Sun-Thu
-Play 1.5+ Hours vidya a day
>Dailies are things you ALWAYS do. Every day or certain days of the week. Planned, they are only good.
+Lift (m - w - f)
+Eat your macros(daily)
+Buy Groceries (Sa)
+Read 30 min (daily)
+Practice the Guitar 30 Min(daily)
+Study Video Editing 40 Min (daily)
+Cook (We, Sa)
+Do your daily points in duolingo
>To-Do are, well, things you must do. You can have a checklist within one To-Do.
()Fix the shelf
()Go to the post office and send the package
()Buy the ticket to the concert
()Pay the landlord
()Organize my trip to the moon
—()Get the rocket tickets
—()Get the reservation for the moon Hostel
—()Buy some moonars to have some local money
—()Buy a map of moon city
Seeing the numbers go up (or health go down) is a weird sort of motivation. I can vouch for it. Give it a try, if you have no idea where to start, This is a good one.
Fill your bad habits, put the to-do’s and take it from there.
Meditation and focus is taking a Long fucking while. While I do meditate, It's not my strongpoint, so It doesn't come as easy.
Boils down to, meditation is really advisable in today's world of instant gratification.
It's important to listen to your own voice from time to time.
Mediation will help you focus on the long run, as you gain control of yourself.
Some (non-curated)resources I've been mentioned on the way:
If you have any recommendation, idea or something along the lines, Please reply to this post. I'll check them out.
As for Finance. That's also under construction.
But managing your own money is fucking important.
I'm just scratching the surface on it. I advice you check this:
And read the following advice from finacebrah
To get started, you obviously need to get an income sorted, now, there are 2 main ways to make money, work for somebody else, or earn money yourself.
Working for somebody else is self explanatory, you go out and get a job, busting your balls, normally for peanuts if you don't have a great career, and doing that day after day, year after year. Is this always a bad thing? No, most people start here in fact, it tends to be a good, at least consistent way to make money. People do it there whole lives, and that's up to them.
BUT SHIT FINANCEBRAH, I DON'T WANT TO BE BUSTING MY BALLS TO MAKE SOMEONE ELSE A LOAD OF MONEY, I hear you say.
Earning money for yourself.
Again, there are two ways to do this. Firstly, is ACTIVELY earning it, creating a business, that you work at and it provides you with profit, and PASSIVELY earning it, meaning you put money you already have to work.
I can't possible cover off every single way to actively make money in 1 post, but if it interests you, look into it. You can start an online business while you already have a job, if you still want the security. You can start a side gig on the weekends, you can import and sell at markets or online.You can jack it all in, and start a physical business (please don't do that without serious thought) Actively earning money is one of the most rewarding things you can do, IMHO
>Low start up cost businesses/part time
There are hundreds of articles out there, have a look, see what you think, and do your research.
BUT SHIT FINANCEBRAH, NOW I'M EARNING ALL THIS MONEY, WHAT DO I DO WITH IT, SHOULD I BUY A FERRARI?
You save it, live within your means, don't go into high interest debt, keep expenses low, the more you save, the more you can put to work, and the more you can earn.
Passively earning money.
I like to call this putting your money to work for you, it's takes money you have saved, investing it, and getting a return on it.
I CAN MAKE MONEY WITHOUT WORKING FINANCEBRAH? ARE YOU FOR REAL.
Yes. This is how most people become wealthy, saving money, and getting a big return on it. How do you do that? Again, there are hundreds of ways. As a general rule, the higher the risk, the higher the reward. What you invest in depends on your investment strategy.
Read it and create one, it should tie in to your long term goals that you set and have written down.
Again, too many different kind of investments to cover in one post, here is a good overview of them.
This is the risk order:
I personally prefer Real estate, forex trading, and stocks. There is so much information out there, I can just encourage you to read and learn as much as possible. See what suits your life and where you live. And never stop learning.
FINANCEBRAHS RULES ON HOW TO BE FINANCIALLY SMART
>PAYING OFF HIGH INTEREST DEBT IS THE BEST FORM OF SAVING THERE IS, payday loans first,credit cards, ect.
>NEVER GO INTO DEBT TO BUY THINGS THAT DEPRECIATE, IF YOU CAN MANAGE IT
>LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS. THE BRAND NAME BAKED BEANS COME AFTER ALL THE HARD WORK
>AVOID ALL LATE PENALITIES ON DEBT
and finally, the most important one.
TRY AND SAVE SOMETHING EVERY PAY PERIOD. IT DOESN'T MATTER IF ITS $1, SET A GOAL OF HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO SAVE AND FUCKING HIT IT, PUT IT INTO AN ACCOUNT TO BE USED ONLY FOR INVESTING.
Put just on a personal note, the whole point of /SIG/ is to make life more enjoyable for you, and not to please other people. By all means, use the resources we have shared, but please don't feel like you need to achieve everything we have to feel like you have made it, these are all just suggestions.
And on that note, please let us know how we can improve the sticky!
Are you attempting to get this stickied?
Nice resources, but why not make it a website? Just keep it simple and post it there, then try to get it linked in the already existing sticky.
>This may sound stupid, but I worried I won't be able to. I sorta have a problem with letting go. I did learn from this if it makes any difference. And I think I won't make this mistake again. But who knows?
don't be a bitch homeboy
Just reposting this again in case anyone wants to answer here:
He was everything I wanted to be: calm, cool (both as in "cool kids at school" and "cool under pressure), confident, relaxed, and collected. He was also more talented than me and more popular (though he admitted he wasn't popular still felt like he was). Everyone thought he was talented and wonderful. I figured "hey seems like a cool guy to hang around." I just wanted to be like him because he had everything together.
This may sound stupid, but I worried I won't be able to. I sorta have a problem with letting go. I did learn from this if it makes any difference. And I think I won't make this mistake again. But who knows?
>You should post this in /r9k/
>I believe there may still be hope for them
double kek. they don't want any help.
I don't want to say they are doomed, but if you post /sig/ on /r9k/ they'll just post frogs and call us normies.
/fit/ is the perfect place for /sig/ since fitness is self improvement.
/r9k/ is self destruction.
>they'll just post frogs and call us normies.
Made me legit laugh out loud. It's so true.
I've seen /self-improvement/ type threads posted in there and they generally either 404 or get a bunch of frogs, as you said. No help wanted.
>I think the point behind the thread
something something about always being in a room with your betters
I hang out here because I'm a fuckup who needs to get his life together. I reckon I need some kind of social interaction, hence why I come to 4chan in the first place; it's more of an urge than an actual rational decision. Way to borken to have any real, meaningful, relations atm, so 4chan is alright as a substitute, I guess. Its a hell lot better here in regards to ambition as compared to say, int. You need a constructive atmosphere and way of thinking, not a toxic and destructive one. The links and "lifehacks" can be useful sometimes as well, but I honestly consider it secondary to just seeing someone post about making advances in life and using that as inspiration
Same here, in terms of life situation, why 4chan, why /fit/ rather than other boards. I used to go to r9k, I'm a robot trying to get out of a pretty bad rut. Just started lifting four weeks ago...
Here is something good on sleep:
I've been actually doing that stuff and it's been helping. Takes time though...
Why not do that?
Can still have the sticky, but, to make a website that you could update as needed and have a url to paste around would be good too.
Sort of like: http://liamrosen.com/fitness.html
Yeah. I mean I post that http://liamrosen.com/fitness.html and and other stuff on /b/ and /r9k/ and other places all the time. Could do the same with this. Gives it a wider audience. A good link is nice because people will bookmark it or whatever. Plus then you have more control over it. Hosting is so cheap now too.... if you want to hide your identity a bit get a domain with domain privacy (most offer that).
>Share your successes
Just got a job at a fitness clothing chain store, free 100$ pair of shoes first day of training and 7 days of full pay for just listening to different brand ambassadors. Life is good brehs, also thanks for putting this up man gotta learn how to save!
Practice in a mirror, just talking shit. Being bad at public speaking comes from a fear of messing up or being judged, the more you practice, the more used to speaking to nobody in particular you get.
Gj anon, keep up the good work.
>want to be frugal and save money
>also want to spend a year or two travelling
film yourself giving a presentation. Then watch it. several times. You'll see several places where you look like a moron. You'll notice all the times you say "umm" and "uhh" and other bullshit filler.
Work on it and film yourself again. watch it again. improve.
Yo financebrah what do you think about splitting my paycheques in this sort of way;
one third of money goes into current a/c (weekly spending, clothes, necessities etc.)
one third of money goes into short term saving a/c (saving up to get a car, holiday etc)
one third of money goes into long term saving a/c (rainy day + mortgage) bear in mind that I'm only 21 and still in full time education, job is part time
How do I stop being a cuck in social situations?
I have trouble putting words together sometimes in social situations although when typing on a computer I can vividly talk about things descriptively while in real life I occasionally sound like a toddler
>Share your successes, failures, methods, and everything in between.
Just got off psych meds, spent most of last year withdrawaling - that was self improvement of sorts (quit amphetamines, benzos, and two anti-depressants).
Now I'm on nothing but have no energy, super depressed, pretty suicidal too.
To try to combat the depression been trying to get /fit/ for the last month. I've read it helps with depression. I'm currently 5' 9" 215lbs, I want to get down to 172-lbs by late November (30th birthday) and get some strength.
It's really hard to go to the gym since I'm so tired (maybe the depression), but I got a personal trainer (I live in Miami, so they aren't bad here) and been doing cardio outside of that.
Outside of that been watching my diet... I weigh myself every morning.
It's good to save early. I started saving at a young age and since interest compounds it really helped me now that I am older. Even that bullshit job money I made in like high school but stored some away became at least semi-valuable since it has gotten interest for so long. So, for sure keep that 1/3 long term savings going as long as you can. well done.
Good job on the getting off of all that shiiii mang
Stick with the gym, once you get into a routine there's pretty much nothing more satisfying than seeing those numbers go down on the scale
Don't forget to use MyfitnessPal and a TDEE calculator to work out cutting calories
Take it from an anon who's beginning to see his abs after being a fat as fatass, nothing compares to this
That's a decent start, although I'd take your paycheck, take out the necessities, then split the leftover 1/2 1/2, if you have enough discipline to just buy the necessities.
There's a light at the end of the tunnel man, my depression got heaps better this past year.
Practice talking, a lot.
Thanks man. I only have a couple of likeminded colleagues, exbosses and friends who share these interests, so this thread is honestly a blast to be in.
This thing has been made into something really good. Thank you for that.
Also, I think this guy hit the nail on the head >>31489767
Cold showers. Some dude posted about it before. Every little bit helps,
but ik some of those feels. Was really down, before. Pretty strong suicidal thoughts (it's pretty bloody bizarre when you think back on it), barely got out of bed etc. for like 2 months. Gotten better since, but still the damn sense of tiredness lingers on. Sleep like 12 hours a day. Could easily sleep more if I wanted to
I really don't have the discipline to just buy necessities unfortunately, I like having some money to just do what I want.. I'm not a huge fan of being frugal it's going to be hard saving at all! Thanks for the advice though breh
Financebrah I got a question.
A bro of mine is offering to hook me up with a web developer job, I've been neet for like 2 years now so this really might be the lottery ticket to a non-shit life... But I don't really know too much so I don't want to fuck it up
What should I do? Should I go for it and try my best without knowing very much? I'm thinking worst case scenario it doesn't work out but at least I learn a bit and know how what to learn more.
Thanks, I'm going to stick with it, I'm hoping to see some results soon so I can get bits of reinforcement.
I'll try that MyFitnessPal, thanks. I already did the TDEE, but with oddball foods or home cooked stuff can be hard to judge - I think that will help.
Congrats on your success! I hope to get there too!
Yeah I think also coming off these depression meds made me rebound depressed, hoping it'll start to get better this year. Sucks waking up in a panic, terrible way to start every day. Depressed a lot.
Yeah I'm still very tired, but I just have been pushing through. I'm hoping it passes, because it's exhausting and hard to get better when there isn't any energy too. Basically, hard enough for people to get good at going to the gym, then you add on top of that waking up feeling like crap every day and it makes it that much harder.
I managed to reconnect with an old friend and it went way better than I expected
I-I-I'm getting better at drawing
I found out why I have a hard time accepting compliments
I still have a job and the people there like having me there
I feel more confident about driving
I ruined a relationship I wanted to work out real bad but got needy (yeah I'm this faggot: >>31489600)
I still have shit self esteem
I can not focus on the positives
I'm still self conscious
still compare myself to others
decided to try and hangout with people who want to improve so no wizardchan or /r9k/ but instead /fit/
talking to therapist
talked about my problems with my friend and he has done similar so he helped
may consider taking an art class just to meet people
take notes on advice I get
>everything in between
still feeling rejected
uh...I'm here I guess
MFP is godly for losing that weight, once you use it for a week straight (on every single thing you eat don't skip! even an estimation and tracking is better than not tracking) It'll become second nature, I'm on a 45 day tracking streak of tracking everything I've eaten sure enough lbs are coming off
Ay bruh I'm gonna go for it.
I'll just explain to him that I'm not too knowledgeable but I'm good at learning and that I appreciate the opportunity and would love to learn more.
Maybe they'll pity me and I'll gain experience and then start making the big bucks
Though I'm not at all religious, a muslim friend (even mentor) I have huge amounts of respect for agreed to take me to a mosque and share his religion (plus we where in the Middle East at the time learning arabic) and I was astonished. The prayer cycles (98% of the time in the mosque) where just like meditation. Transcendental meditation with some extra Allah's and a khutbah on friday's. Meditating in plenum 5 times a day with a time to internalize gratitude (towards a god, but gratitude is gratitude all the same) and a time to consider if the actions you are taking are virtuous.
It struck me as not quite unlike Seneca's obsessive quest to philosophical "betterment" with some authoritarian structures slipped. It was rather pleasant, and I can definitely see how you could benefit a lot from the rituals.
This is ofc disregarding "church politics" (for lack of a better term) and their macro level moralisms. This is the view I got looking purely at the inner personal thinking and the (very meditative) rituals they call prayer.
help me sig it's my first term back after a leave of absence and i think my gpa is going down even more i think i failed a class i've failed once before
instead of cramming for my calc exam tomorrow i'm cleaning and watching hannibal buress standup and shitposting on /fit/
nah but for real how do yall monitor your internet useage
The rule of thumb is that your internal clock can swing an hour a night in a sustainable way. That being said, jumping straight to the new time and taking Melatonin consistently for at least as many days as you have shifted hours is faster way of going about it though the first day or two can still be a bit rough.
This is all assumed no computers or screens in bed, or right before going (at least no screen emitting blue light, f.lux fixes this).
I've also read about taking ice baths prior to bed to really facilitate falling asleep, since we know changes in temperature does it though it is unclear exactly why. Haven't tried this so I don't know. I do take cold showers, but I do it in the morning after lifting. And in the morning it just wakes you the fuck up.
Talking to people confidently, especially small random encounters like shop assistants and stuff.
Good, thats what /sig/ is all about.
Goodnight /sig/, Gotta be up in 4 hours so better get to bed, keep this thread going overnight, if you want me to answer any questions, tag this post and ill get around to them. Might stay on lurking for a while from my iPad.
Hey Financebrah, my father is giving me ownership of the house, and I don't know jack shit about housing and neither does he. Anywhere I can learn on my own, or would that be here? >>31489432
If so, what books?
WasteNoTime for Safari. Made my friend make the password (I have 1 day with free access to all sites a week) and told him to charge me money if I asked for it. Then he moved away to a place with patchy internet (hardcore job) at best and I haven't asked for it since.
StayFocusd for Chrome.
Also I've heard good things about RescueTime, it apparently also tracks time spent in other applications.
Hey Financerbrah, i think you should stop posting this threads so constant because they might lost its value and their general interest.
Since SIG take time, the same things should happen to the post, so people could achive thing and could post them.
Property is difficult with so many variables, like location, your goals, the market ect.
Most property books will tell you the same, it's mainly math so just pick up a highly rated one off Amazon.
If you want a lump of cash, sell it. If you want an income, rent it out. If you want a free house and half a lump of cash, finance half of it, use the rent to cover the mortgage. Obviously you can do improvements to make it worth more.
How to exactly start this? I have tons of life changing SI material on my computer and i always think about starting , reading and getting a routine but it's so fucking hard to start it and keep up without seeing good results
I have had dark circles under my eyes for my whole life and was wondering if there is anything that can fix them besides surgery. If it helps I have allergies regularly and I don't go out that much in the sunlight.
Yeah yeah everybody is happy and positive here because everybody live in USA or other first world developed country, with mom and dad paying your education and giving to you good contacts.
I would love to live a life in easy mode too
Come here and live in Argentina without the possibility to go to university,studying everyday by yourself, reading the same books that university students read but knowing that in the future you will not have a degree or any paper to prove your knowledge..
Stay hydrated, it thins the mucus and helps with sinuses
Also make sure to eat fiber, when I get constipated the circles under my eyes get darker - they get much better when my bowls get moved regularly.
so what do you want us to do?
Why would people compare themselves to someone who has it worse in life?
Oh I was born with a normal height and working limbs, damn that person was born with mutated legs. guess i should stop lifting and become like him
are you literally poor? are you literally retarded?
>but knowing that in the future you will not have a degree or any paper to prove your knowledge..
that's onto you faggot
you are proving my point
you are retard and a samefag :^)
Just went full BETA on my oneitis. Needless to say, there's no redeeming myself.
Thing is I was feeling more confident lately. I just relapsed really fucking hard.
How do I permanently rid myself of this beta curse?
speaking of improving the sticky: why isn't there anything about intermittent fasting, which I've just gotten into? periodically letting your body exhaust all the glycogen in your liver so it can metabolize fat and make ketone bodies is a really good idea, for reasons that go well beyond aesthetics.
I am religious in a sense of culture but i do have a faith and i follow it by personal terms
i have found that it has indeed been helpful in my personal /SIG/ progress so i stuck with it. Going to a church helps you stick with it and maintain a sense of community that you find later in life is much needed because as most would know, feeling alone in any part of your life is depressing and discouraging. In very dark times i have found that the meditative value of prayer has helped me reach a better understanding of things i normally wouldn't have seen. That peace gave me a sense of control over my problems that allowed me to step out of the shoes of anxiety and look into my life in third person.
I was raised in a religious family, but I am not religious myself (Aren't I a special snowflake, eh?). I do, however respect a lot of religious people and don't hate religious people in general. I am more or less a non-practicing atheist.
Why afraid of taking a class about how not to fail in front of other people? Afraid of failing in front of other people in the class? If you want to improve public speaking skills, taking a class is the best thing.
That is not true. I am from Europe here, living with four siblings and a widowed mother. This year, every month has been a struggle with money, but we all know the importance of education and doing our best with studying. I am in the best school in the country, and I am planning to go to MIT after that, since they offer full need blind admissions. I know that I am aiming high, but hell, who else will do it? I have a decent chance in succeeding.
I do CLBSA. Each letter is a different body part for a different day.
Chest, legs, back, shoulder, arms.
Try to space the chest workout far from the shoulder and arm workout to let it heal properly.
Nice work. Fuck You Money became my biggest motivator in the beginning for saving seriously (that, and a cold hard slap in the face when the first time I moved countries and to an internship with shit pay)
Now I'm more and more working towards FI, a la:
Get involved in places where that shit is encouraged. Politics, drama (maybe even dance?) or go traveling to countries where the locals are outgoing. South America, Thailand & surrounding places, and the Middle East (here language is a bigger barrier than some of the other places) are good places. Even Spain has a more extroverted culture than most of the west.
>one third of money goes into short term saving a/c (saving up to get a car, holiday etc)
A great start at a way younger age than most!
Obviously your preference may wary, but really consider when and IF to buy (+what type and how old) a car. They cost way more than most people think.
A bike (and moving closer to work if necessary) often generates way more "returns" than any investment vehicle ever could.
Is there any way to get the "natural charm"? I've noticed I really lack this, specially when trying to pick up girls.
I have no problems with speaking to other people, I'm pretty outgoing. My face is ok, I dress well, my body is ottermode-ish and I'm pretty well off in terms of money (For an 18 y/o in the last year of the gymnasium. I will be even better off when I've graduated). I have to 95% a permanent well-paid job after school, my grades are good, but I really lack any kind of charm that attracts women, both long-term and short-term. I'm 90% sure that this is my problem
Is there any way to practice this specifically? What should I think about?
I've always sort of had a natural charm but I credit it to watching a lot of shows and comedians. I emulate, but make it my own with my own charisma. People find me hilarious because the humor I use is usually using wit, ,sarcasm, puns, or often speaking about something completely ridiculous but with an absolutely stone cold serious tone.
+ if you want free education (and not an online one) but from a good institution, learn a Scandinavian language (not Swedish though. Will make you more homo than even /fit/ can. And they charge money for foreigner who come and study there) and apply for uni here.
In Finland you even have english Bachelor Degrees (both for business and engineering), though you will need Finnish to get a job, so since Norwegian is easier to learn it's probably best to just learn that first and apply straight to a Norwegian bachelor degree. Some Norwegian Uni's even give you an extra year just to perfect your Norwegian skills before starting the rest of your studies.
Then you only need to save up for flights + a couple of months of minimal living before getting a shit local job (which will pay more than 10-15 € an hour anyway, double if you are working nights in a bar). I know a bunch of people who have done this.
Solve your problems instead of complaining about them.
seriously man. If my fucking VENEZUELAN friend can do it (now he has management experience, Finnish salary & he's considering free grad school which can be done while working).
He even got his first job without good Finnish skills (which take a bit of luck in Finland).
Argentina should be at least easier mode.
Video games are not self-improvement, unless you are playing actually educational games. It's been studdied, and doing puzzle games doesn't make you smarter, it makes you better with puzzle games, giving you the illusion of being smarter.
The hand-eye coordination benefits are miniscule and you would be much better off doing a martial art, but that doesn't mean you have to cut them off completely. You could listen to a podcast while playing something, if you can split the attention. Alternatively, it is just a nice way to reward yourself for doing well at something, but be careful not to go overboard.
I have gotten most of my friends due to my humor, but my humor is kinda messed up and I know it won't appeal to women so I don't use it.
I guess it might be a immaturity issue, but I know a lot of people I would consider more immature than me(With par/subpar looks etc) that picks up girls easily. I guess their charm doesn't come from humor.
I've been working on becoming generally more mature the last half year or so and I feel like I've improved a lot. I started doing this primarily because I work with people that's older than 45 (I'm the youngest in the company and It's pretty big). I guess my time will come too as I continue to improve my weak spots
It's never too late to sell and buy a more efficient one. HOLY SHIT 12 mpg.
It often comes down to eye contact & mood. Before approaching, get into the mood by literally imagining fucking the girl aggressively. Being halfway hard and feeling the blood flow is the mood you want to be in when flirting for giving off a sexual vibe. By changing your mood you will change hers, assuming basic attraction. I see charm as just being attractive, funny (disarming) and sexual at the same time.
Consider getting a song that you associate of this feeling (for me it's usually: The Age of the Understatement by The Last Shadow Puppets) and routinely listen to this while going to the party or club.
This is a habit I made without really being aware of (the song part, the mood is talked about most places) for many years, and when I read the Art of Learning by Joshua Waitzkin he talks about for improving job performance in meetings, negotiations and doing well for the whole day. He writes that starting to meditate yourself into that feeling and slowly making the meditation shorter and shorter and using the same song until you can just take 3 minutes in the office and listen to the song and be on top of it like you normally would after a long meditation session.
No. In Finland it's free, in Norway it costs 80$ a semester. I've been told Germany is also a good place to do this.
Sweden and Denmark are the ones that charge money. You guys so scared of other cultures instead of using it as an opportunity. Not realizing inviting arabs into your country and learning arabic from them from an early age is the best way to do well in oil. Ditto for Persian and Telecommunication Technology, and Pashto for military and diplomatic stuff. Also Chinese for shipping and IT.
Only African languages are useless though.
NEVAR. Cars and trucks are the only think I really ever waste money on, and considering I'm buying an auto repair shop, I think it's okay =D
Pic related bumper will be the next waste of money =D
>Yeah, this is good advice. I bought a 60k car that gets 12 mpg and costs me 4k a year in insurance, and sometimes i regret it xD
>It's never too late to sell and buy a more efficient one. HOLY SHIT 12 mpg.
When gas prices went up a while back, a lot of people sold their gas guzzler and bought something more efficient. But for many, once they factored in the loss taken on the trade in and the expense of the new car, it would take a really, really long time for the higher gas milage to pay off.
Depends on your commute, obviously. But, just something to think about/calculate.
>this is the manchild you are taking life advice from.
I don't browse >>>/o/ much but there is a meme of a truck just like that on there...
Ah yeah, nah I don't want the neon on it, I don't even want that exact bumper, It was just the only pic I had on the comp I was on.
Actually, pic related will probably be the next mod.
Of course ft's fine. People indulge in different things, and based on your info you're already pretty set financially, but holy fuck unless you are literally Stringer Bell, an Arab sheik or Vladimir Putins best childhood friend that is fucking insane!
I'll take a nice thin-wheeled bike, European level public transport and a couple of flat shoes to walk in any day.
First time ever paying attention to this thread and I just fucking lold at what I witnessed
>has a link to "How to Hold Conversation Like a Man" video
>uses emoticons like "=D" in this thread
Welp, thanks for the laughs.
>8am and I'm awake
>need to do cardio today
Going to get to gym before the normalfags wake up. Earning lots of good boy points today.
Huh, didn't see a general. Ignore thread I made, apologies for wasting space.
So I've FINALLY gotten my self into a pattern I can actually get myself to stick with. Been running the elliptical ~400 - 600 calories at a whack, been sticking with it pretty well. Finally started a reduced/improved diet that's been going pretty well too.
Only problem is with the elliptical, I'm not sure how light of resistance i need to run to avoid ANY bulking of my legs. I read it does do it just a bit, but my thighs are already up there from cycling for exercise/commute/recreation in a fairly hilly town, and the muscles used to be bulbous.
Trying to get in shape, but don't want to bulk up my legs, will doing 30 to 45 minutes on the elliptical at a lighter resistance setting do a lot of bulking, or am I good?
>Just come out of a spell of depression
>Feel happy and motivated to exercise and right again
>Start doing these things
>Still have anxiety
>Invited to a party tonight and I am fucking bricking it, I have no idea how to talk to new people at parties anymore and I don't know most people who are going
I want to go because it'll be better than sitting at home doing nothing and I'll regret it if I don't, but I'll also not have that great a time there because this lot are all proper hardcore and "the cool kids" and don't they fucking know it
you gotta start somewhere, the fact that you got invited means they're cool with you and enjoy being with you
just drink alcohol, don't overdo it and drink too much, just get to the point where you don't give a fuck and you'll have a blast
>just drink alcohol, don't overdo it and drink too much, just get to the point where you don't give a fuck and you'll have a blast
See this is the flaw in your master plan, I don't drink and haven't in nearly two years. It didn't used to be a problem because I had insanely high confidence and didn't need to drink to have fun sober at a party, but now I don't know how to get the confidence back
Not feeding the trolls, legit question. I want to lose weight without gaining Arnie Schwartzenegger legs, I've heard that elliptical are pure weight loss but also that they build a bit, I'm trying to see what's what. Is this a contentious issue?
That sounds to be exactly what I'm after.
earning more GBP by working out today, Anon?
Rich Dad, Poor Dad needs to be on here. It discusses the wageslavery trap that professionals (college grads, making 50-150k a year) fall into.
Intermediate microeconomics doesn't help with shit. Source: currently taking it. It's all theoretical bullshit that doesn't much apply to real life, unless you're managing a business and need to decide labor/capital ratio and optimal size. It's not gonna hurt, but is largely a waste of time.
Ben Franklin? Haven't read it, but that shit is probably long out of date by now. The game has changed.
Anything "for dummies" is shit. I've read several, and they're all cringy babby-tier wrongfag sewage.
Fucking communist hipster.
My negro. His blog is my inspiration for biking for all short-distance (under three miles one-way) errands. It's fun, relaxing, and gives me a cardio boost. Traffic causes anxiety, biking reduces it.
If I get my ass a job, I want to get a proper roadbike to extend my effective radius of travel options. Though my mountainbike handles offroad "shortcuts" and going off curbs damned well. Also rips snow apart like a beast. Biking on ice is ridiculously fun.
True. Reading your regurgitated bullshit is putting me to sleep.
Trying to get a new haircut before I go for a job interview, what should I get that is fashionable yet tasteful? Also should I lift before to get a good shoulder pump? I do sweat a little after I workout but a pump might help give confidence and a better look but I worry about the sweat.
Hi brehs, I have a problem and need your help.
I got a gf a week ago, she's my first gf ever (18yo) and everything is fine, but the problem is that her life has been really hard, but she's not depressed or anything, she seems to be doing perfectly fine.
The problem is that she always tells me that the only person that knows all her life is her best friend (a male friend), and from what I've seen, their conversations seem to be much more than friendly, and even more "romantic" than ours.
How can I overcome my insecurities and stop being jealous /fit/?
Theres a lot of different variables, have a read through this http://www.rothira.com/traditional-ira-vs-roth-ira
Let me know which one you think and WHY, and I'll be able to help you better.
I'd say I'll go for the Roth IRA over traditional. I'll type it out in my own thoughts rather than copy paste so you can get an idea of what is going through my head:
The reason I want to go for a Roth IRA is because its already TAX deducted, and I don't have to worry about taxes when I take the money out. HOWEVER, I must wait 5 years for a disbursement. Seems like the better choice for someone like myself.
Since you only got autistic replies, here's when I think.
If you want her to tell you things, get her to a calm place, perhaps go on a walk along a river, if that's possible, and then sit down and tell her some of your life, and after that, just casually ask her about her experiences. It would be only natural for her to share then.
To feel less jealous, you should probably get in a one-on-one conversation with her male friend (note that he might be friendzoned, look for signs of that), and if he's cool, just ask him about when they met, what was she like when she was younger (this helps hide the true intent) and other casual things regarding her. You might even try pushing a bit to trigger a reaction about how he feels about her, and if he's not interested in her in a romantic way, he will tell you. This is a bit harder though, and I can't help with that if I don't know any details.
Why are you "not too keen" on that?
What do you POSSIBLY know that the worlds millionaires and billionaires don't?
You know nothing. You have no foundational knowledge on which to base your "feelings." You obviously haven't even taken the slightest bit of effort in learning the basics. So why the fuck would you think you know what to be "keen" on?
I'm going to help you out because I'm a nice guy. But don't ever say something that dumb again. It's literally like a hungry skeleton saying "I'm looking to build some muscle but I'm not too keen on lifting weights or eating."
Here. One of the best, no bullshit learning resources out there. Read this or may god have mercy on your soul.
First off thank you for all your tips
My question is
My life has been pretty straight foward for 18 years. I started going to uni thanks to all your tips i finally made friends but my question is
Everytime they invite me to a party i usually say no. So they dont really ask me. I usually spend my night smoking weed and trying to improve my mental health. Is this killing my social gains?
How do I enjoy life finance brah?
Do i have to live to society's definition of a successful life?
I really like trying new things my friends say i have to many goals? is that good or bad
My final question is
How do i keep promises to myself?
I dont think i have the will power
How do i focus on one goal?
you're not a nice guy.
you're a faggot who thinks that you know my assumptions based on me using the word 'keen'. You're probably a pretentious fuck in real life. So pedantic.
Go fuck yourself; saying you're a nice guy and then being patronizing. It's faggots like you who trigger me.
You're not a nice guy faggot.
Not a fan of picking stocks for others because they don't learn anything, but heres a protip, buy Amazon, they are saving and reinvesting a buttload of cash.
That's true, but also the contributions aren't tax deductible like a traditional IRA
Yes, it is killing your social gains.
You enjoy life by finding what makes you happy, and coming up with a plan to achieve that.
No, you define your own successful life.
Good, as long as your goals are all specific, measurable and achievable.
It varies for everyone, have a look around this thread and the web for some resources, find one, and stick with it.
If he doesn't want to invest in stocks and bonds he doesn't have too, he will probably make more in a mutual fund, probably an index, than picking them anyway.
Index funds and mutual funds ARE STOCKS.
Cry more and stay poor then, faggot.
>hurr I wanna invest my monies but I don't want to invest in the most tried-and-true asset classes!! I know better than the world's billionaires!
I use intrinsic usually too, I like going through financials. Sometimes I go with gut picks though.
But you aren't picking them, so you don't need near as much knowledge. An index fund performs better than most actively managed funds, so it's not like all the studying helps you beat the market much.
I took some accounting classes, helped my gains immensely. I'm going with strong oil companies with strong competitive advantage. energy as a whole is undervalued at the moment. I usually look for a dividend too.
Many ways of doing intermittent fasting. Only main principle you need to follow is that your body is in caloric deficit for an extended period of time, alternating that with periods where you are not. One frequently recommended in mainstream health (at least here in Sweden), is 5:2, wherein you eat like one normalsized meal on two days, then eat normally on the rest. I find mostly abstaining food for an entire day is easier than trying to cram at a certain time of the day. Also read some study that found that CV markers etc. actually got worse with the later method
Financebrah, okay I ruined a potential friendship with someone and now he won't respond to me. I am realizing how this was for the better (it was me being star struck basically) and decided to move on. But a part of me still wants to try and reconnect with him. I'm giving him space atm and stopped talking to him. But what do I do about the part that wants to make it up to him? I want to be his friend but he most likely doesn't. Thank you.
I've loved doing that for ages. I used to buy things at police repo auctions and sell them online, whenever i made a profit i was so happy haha
It's simple anon, you can either try and make it up, the worst he can say is no, or you can just try and forget about it, knowing you didnt want it anymore.
I'm one of the major contributors to the post.
And I think I said it a while back.
>third world country
>learned English on my own
>work since middleschool
>never learned to drive, because fuck it if you for thinking I could get a car
>shared a tiny ass room with my brothers while growing up.
>For weeks we ate sandwiches because that was the cheapest thing we could make, since they cut up the gas.
>Sometimes no milk. We never had bread.
>Seldom had new clothes.
>Was a parasite to my friends growing up.
And yet I AM the one that wrote:
>Accept things as they are, realize that life is cruel and your circumstances are the ones you were given. You can’t do shit about the starting point, but you can move forward.
For years, I victimized myself.
>If only I had been born in "Insert country"
FUCK that mindset. Consumed to many years of my life....
I Payed my way trough college.
I got my shit together.
When I started lifting, it was with some dumbbells I made.
Then I made my own Squat rack and bought a barbell and weights.
I got my shit together.
I'm currently working on a so-called first world for one of the two biggest IT companies in the world.
Want to keep being a victim? Suit yourself.
You're not going to make it, it seems.
I plan to make my grandfather proud when I see him again.
I always tell her about my life, but she only talks about her family and not even his close family.
And I would like to know her friend better, sadly he's from another city (as my gf) and it would be weird to ask my gf for his phone or something.
A shitload of spelling errors in that comment.
But that kind of mentality hits close to home. That was me 10 years ago.
One should not be entitled, one should be grateful.
Others have it better. Sure they fucking do.
Complaining is free.
But so is dreaming.
>me and my dad go to meet up with my grandfather (we started to do this every year around Christmas)
>told my grandfather I'm enthusiastic about programming
>that look of disappointment on his face
>I was later told that he really wanted one of his children/grandchildren to become a chemist
I don't think I'll ever forget how disappointed he looked, I hope I can somehow make it up while he's still alive
Feels bad man
kek. Did he have any background as a chemist himself? My grandmother wanted my brother to become a priest, for some strange reason, and me to become a doctor. I'm studying medicine, so at least she got part of her wish fulfilled
well, at least yours is still alive, while mine still was, he always told me that he wanted me to learn many languages, and go visit the president or something like that.. meh the feelings
Hur jör du din guatemole?
Are you under 30? If so, try 9 a night for a month and if you feel like less would work then go for it.
The older you get the less sleep you generally need (at least correlation based research would suggest this).
I've decided to make it to him. But only after a certain period of time (a month being the minimum) so he can cool off. In the meantime I'm gonna work on improving myself starting with my confidence. Where do you recommend I start boosting my confidence and self esteem?
Most people need between 6.5-8 hours as adults (~21+), younger is more like 8-9. Sleep needed is based on sleep efficiency, which is highly individual.
It's also easy to influence via medications or drugs, for example if someone drinks their REM and deep sleep are suppressed causing them to require a longer duration of sleep to feel rested since the most restful cycles will come later in the night. Same with narcotics like benzos.
how do you skinnies fucking have trouble you just have to eat for fucks sake
Don't be a moron, anon. People are different, and not everyone is the same as you are, it might be the time to realize that/
>really like girl
>really getting along with this girl
>spend enitire party cuddling with her (don't kiss because her friends are Nazis and they've already slapped someone for trying)
>ask her out
>she says she'd love to
>says only reason why we can't is that my ex is her best friend
>"ex" is still upset about me and other women despite the fact that dumped me after one date (can she even count as an ex?)
>girl I'm cuddling with is genuinely upset about this standing in the way
How do I convince her to talk to her friend about it? Her best friend and I only went on one date and it was over a year ago but we spent a few months sending flirty texts beforehand. I know this girl likes me because she intentionally kept pulling me closer to her all evening and was the one who initiated the cuddling.
>>"ex" is still upset about me and other women despite the fact that dumped me after one date (can she even count as an ex?)
rofl. Why would you give even a barely hovering fuck about what the other girl thinks? Just go for it
>in /r9k/ most of them are lost souls
Strangest way of writing "virtolic entilted betas with massive madonna whore complex" i have ever seen.
Strange, I stop eating when I'm down. Lost like 5 kg in two weeks lel. Then I get an urge to exercise, realize I'm too weak while doing it, and start eating properly again. Nice safety thing to have
Oh, sorry. Well, idk then. Seems like a really cuntish thing to be upset about that, nice "friend". Doesn't the girl you like see this as well?
No worries man. I know right? She's a massive bitch considering it was her who dumped me. I'll try and point out that she has no right to be upset given the fact that us not being together was her decision.
Thanks for trying to help though man.
For me at least: martial arts. Or any other delayed gratification activity with a sense of achievement in a social setting.
Make her feel safe with you (confidence is key) and escalate. Play on her feelings (make her fucking really something when she's with you) and get some cognitive dissonance going on:
Half jokingly saying that then you'll just have to never see each other again, while pulling her closer to you.
Saying that you should respect your friends demands instead of following your feelings, while kissing her neck.
Give her room to act on those feelings while at first thinking that she'll consider her friends. Also, I guarantee you she finds it hot that her friend still finds you attractive. So definitely no need for her to talk to her friends yet, in fact, it's probably best to let her avoid that whole confrontation until you have already hit that. Then she's less likely to get cold feet since she feels secure with you, and a bit of sunk cost fallacy.
So hang out with her alone, create sexual tension (not just cuddlin...), add a feeling of security for her through self confidence & logistics, and just fucking escalate.
It's not about who has any right, it's not about logic and fair play. It's about emotions. Your friends and your grills emotions. If your grills emotions (mainly attraction and security) are let grow to become strong enough, she'll ngaf about her friends pissy feels and even find her jealousy sexy. If attraction is lacking she'll keep you cuddling but resist escalation, if security is lacking her insecurity will cause her to bow to peer pressure and distance herself from you.
Do you have any thoughts on increasing REM time under sleep?
From what I've read or tried: avoiding coffee after a certain time, avoiding certain other drugs (especially stimulants), eating small amounts of easily digestable calories, and meditation (biggest effect) have that effect.
Much of it is shit, but how the fuck is the concept of working toward goals that will enhance your life in the long run even though those habit feel tough at first, instead of playing vidya & watching telly or eating fucking pop tarts & having a wank, how on earth is that not a concept that fucking fits the theme of this fucking thread?
I swear to christ either I'm more hungover than I thought, or you literally managed to be so retarded it surprise me, even on 4chan.
GJ man! Now just continue until you're so consistent that motivation isn't even needed.
>Do you have any thoughts on increasing REM time under sleep?
The big one is avoid drugs. Stimulants sure, but actually CNS suppressants such as alcohol and benzodiazepines also delay REM and deep sleep. Actually most drugs have some influence on sleep, including anti-depressants (although less so than other drugs mentioned).
For the most efficient sleep, you want to go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time every morning. This is because the body makes chemicals that put you to sleep, and others that wake you up - the more regular of a schedule you keep, the more concentrated and time-aligned they can be.
Another thing that blocks REM and deep sleep is if someone has a sleep disorder like apnea. In these cases, usually during deep sleep when the muscles relax the most, the airways will collapse and cause the body to wake itself up. This can happen a bunch of times in the night without the person remembering. If someone is sleeping a lot but not feeling rested, overweight, and/or snores it might be worthwhile to get a sleep study done (where apnea can be seen/diagnosed).
>From what I've read or tried: avoiding coffee after a certain time, avoiding certain other drugs (especially stimulants), eating small amounts of easily digestable calories, and meditation (biggest effect) have that effect.
I have not heard of meditation increasing REM sleep, although people have certainly proposed it. It will relax you, which, helps!
Am a muslim fag. I use pray to some extent of regularity. Then I realised that just praying and sitting on my arse wasn't going to get me a job nor fit.
If anyone can help, how do I talk to people and make friends?
Putting my trip on for /sig/. Going to continue reading these threads. Just starting perusing the Arcitea sticky. I may take up a carpentry apprenticeship to progress towards my goal of being a builder.
Are you super shy?
It can help to just expose yourself to other people for a while. Like if you are normally on your laptop, go use it in a coffee house or something rather than at home. Get used to people. Then after a while you might bump into someone, etc.
Thanks a lot financebrah for your advices
If I can give one advice: don't listen what most of fit say :
do not eat oats when you cut, this shit has too much calories
Eat vegeatables raw, or steamed ... Beans are cancer
Stop drinking coffee and tea if you are anxious
Do not squat ass to grass if you have long legs
Most of routines are cancer here, seriously you don't have to including deadlift or free squat to have an efficient routine.
Make your own diet and routine, try and keep what works for you
Sorry for the late reply. I've been told I'm kind of shy, but lately I've been trying to talk to people. I'll explain the problem a bit better. There are these two guys I know from my uni and I have talked to them previously. I was trying to talk to them but they looked completely disinterested. I just kept soldiering on and trying to keep the convo running cause the way I see it is it would increase my own social skills. Especially one of them he completely gives of the disinterested look and tone, doesn't even pay attention when I talk to him (actually almost everyone does this to me). Now I knew that he started going to the gym and stuff before hand, so I moved the conversation to lifting and stuff. He mentioned he wanted to increase his cardio so told him about couch-2-5k and he got kinds interested but soon went down again. He talks to everyone else with interest and passion though. Sometimes I think why talk to him, but I do it because he follows the same faith as me and I try to keep some kind of friendship with him because of that.
The first thing to do is to quit ""autistic"" habits like wearing headphones, avoid people.
Do not hesitate to ask help even if you do not need it because most of people like to help
begin to practise a team sport
do not eat oats when you cut, this shit has too much calories
Eat vegeatables raw, or steamed ... Beans are cancer
Stop drinking coffee and tea if you are anxious
Do not squat ass to grass if you have long legs
Most of routines are cancer here, seriously you don't have to including deadlift or free squat to have an efficient routine.
Make your own diet and routine, try and keep what works for you
Those last two pieces of advice are cancer
>he follows the same faith as me and I try to keep some kind of friendship with him because of that.
Maybe he doesn't want to be the guy that hangs out with the other guy in his faith just because of that and not because of other common interests (even if you do have some).
Basically, he might not want to be known for just hanging out with the one other muslim guy there - and overcompensates.
I'd say just keep talking to other people, then try again a bit later. Sometimes when you keep trying with one person, they resist, and then once you back off they become more receptive.
I don't wear headphones or anything like that. the only thing I carry around that could get in the way is my water bottle and bag. There was this one time this lady from a charity organisation got bored of listening to me. I'll admit though she was very good at hiding it, most people aren't. This skill is one of the things I learnt from my loner experiences.
>do not eat oats when you cut, this shit has too much calories
Why? They are pretty damn satiating and not that high calorie. A 200 kcal bowl of oats is huge.
>Stop drinking coffee and tea if you are anxious
I fully agree with this, I quit and many things improved, mainly sleep.
>Do not squat ass to grass if you have long legs
I wish someone had been there to tell me about this earlier. Managed to fuck up my knee a bit doing ATG, only lowbar just below parallel from now on.
Some of its good, but some i disagree with.
If you wanna get big, eat your mother fucking oats.
If you wanna get big, Squat and diddylift
Never squat ATG, always go just past parallel and explode up.
Beans can be a good source of protein if you can't afford meat, or can't eat it
>oatmeal has too much carbs
>fruit carbs provide you with water
>fruit has fiber, minerals
are you implying oatmeal doesn't?
oatmeal is also pretty much free as in costs close to nothing, fruits and vegetables are quite expensive where i live outside of summertime
Anyways I've gotta go to sleep now. I've got to meet my research supervisor tomorrow and before that gotta cook my lunch.
Bye and thanks for the advice, I'll try and work on some things tomorrow.
some random shit i googled for you, there's plenty more
meditation actually does have some science behind it, if you take a look.
like most mental health research, it has a lot of lurking variables. For example, if someone is meditating and and they measure the change in gray matter or size of amydgala, it might be due to the meditation - or it might be due to other habits that happen to change when someone is more likely to meditate.
I mean most people who meditate have other behaviors that they do which promote peace of mind.
So, I wouldn't call it pseudo science - but I would call it soft-science.
I mean if you look at any of the studies behind meditation you can pick them apart - but that doesn't mean it hasn't been working for monks for ages.
It has a place in here. (although, for me personally, I saw no benefit after 3 months).
>MFP is godly for losing that weight
just wanted to say thanks again for this, Anon.
Been using MyFitnessPal since you mentioned it and getting a much better idea of what I'm eating / also programming my exercise and weight into it. Great tool, thanks!
How do I not hate myself?
I try so hard to improve and I've improved a lot. But everything I do is to make myself average. Everything I am is a struggle to get to where most people start.
I'm ugly, I'm balding, I'm shorter than most my friends(5'8") I have shitty bone structure so I have wide ass hips, I have below average testosterone levels(been checked, not super low but around 600 average is 700)
I have a pencil dick 4.5" girth, and I have premature ejaculation, I can't last more than 2 min tops, I have anxiety issues due to all my faults and a sleep disorder so I'm always fucking tired and have huge bags under my eyes and creases in my face that make me look older and uglier.
Seriously I lift, I dress nice, I try my hardest to be social and interesting and funny and fun to be around. But at the end of the day even with all of this, I will still never be anything special, all of this just makes up for my starting faults. I don't know how to not hate my own body for being so below average.
You hit me right in the feels, Anon. I know exactly what you mean.
From what I can tell, we have to learn to accept who we are.
>Everything I am is a struggle to get to where most people start.
iktf. We'll just have to work harder. It's hard to have to push so hard to do things that for other people comes naturally. My genetics are shit, I'm so anxious can barely get outside the house - but I try and try. That's all we can do.
> I have premature ejaculation, I can't last more than 2 min tops, I have anxiety issues
I think the anxiety issues cause the premature ejaculation. At least in my experience when I'm more anxious it gets worse.
> and a sleep disorder so I'm always fucking tired
I care because everyone I see is better than me. Meaning they will get better jobs, better women, better treatment from everyone around them.
I care because even though I lift I still look worse than half my friends because I have hourglass hips, so even if I have more mass I just look weird and they look natural good as just semi fit lean guys with narrow waists.
I care because I'm afraid sooner or later my girlfriend will leave me because she will realize she can do better and that I'm below average. I'm afraid my needle dick will always be the worst dick she's ever had, that all other partners will be better than me. I'm afraid she will leave me because I can't last in bed no matter how hard I try, I'm afraid all of this dissapoints her and she's just hiding it from me.
I'm sick of trying so fucking hard to be where I'm at while I look at friends who sit around eating KD and doing nothing being naturally better than me.
No one wants to be bottom of the barrel. I want to succeed, I wan't people to be jealous of me for once. I don't want to be that guy people look down or pity. Fuck you I try way harder than you do, I don't want god damn pity.
Mild apnea, plus some restless leg syndrome. Dr is still trying to figure out exactly what it is, all we know is something fucks with my REM sleep. I eat super clean and lift and do cardio, go to sleep at 10pm every night so its not poor habits either.
I want to be loved, I want to be respected. I don't want my GF to leave me and remember me as the worst of all her partners, so think of me as sub par. I don't want my friends to think of me as the little brother of the group. I don't want people to look at me and think "Sheesh he looks like shit for someone in their 20's" with the tired eye bag creases, thinning hair and general attractiveness.
I'll never give up trying, but its hard to not hate yourself and everyone else sometimes.
Average guy lasts 2 minutes, according to the Kinsey Report. I just googled it. I wouldn't know since I'm a virgin, so, you're already doing better than me.
For the sleep apnea, have you tried a cpap?
you sound like a modest, self-aware dude and that is exactly why you shouldn't hate yourself?
do others dislike you? i doubt it. do you have good friends? sure you do
are you a dissappointment to your parents? i don't think so mate
you've obviously had sex so at least once a girl has liked you, a few probably like you now too
treat yourself a nice meal, buy yourself a book - whatever you feel like reading, go out with your mates. sure, life can be shit sometimes - like mine at this point, but that too shall pass
there is no point being better than others - just try to be better around this time next year than now
yeah and I can not for the life of me sleep with it. Tried for 3 months, every time ended up ripping the mask off after about 3 hours of no sleep.
For the legs the Dr recommended a dopamine agonist, but I don't want to take it, I hate shit that messes with brain chemistry and hormones. That shit scares me.
Finished my first quarter of 2015, got 76% of my goals for the time-period
(Censored because fit will laugh at me)
Sometimes I think this way.
But these days more and more there's just this bitterness that sinks in. Every time I see people better than me I just hate them, unless I know they earned it.
But some of my own friends I almost can't stand to be around anymore. Sure they're nice and funny and would kill for me. But I look at them, with good bone structure, attractive facial features, thick hair. Girls throwing themselves at them. Rich parents who support them. General ease and no anxiety, able to enjoy themselves and have tons of free time(mine is eaten up by work and anxiety, even free time I feel constantly uneasy and anxious now, I can't enjoy my old hobbies) I see this and just get bitter and almost resentful of them and don't want to be around them. Half of me loves them, but half of me hates them. Which is unfair and I know it, and i know it would hurt them if they knew, but I can't help it.
I can relate a lot to this, if not for the same reasons. I don't really have a lot of friends, but it's the same with other people. Especially as I study medicine, everyone in my class is some kind of normalfag^2 (with extensive social circles, good mental healh, motivated, ambitious etc.) , while I'm some mentally and physically broken person who just happens to be intelligent. I'd fit much better into some kind of engineering program with 50% autists, lel
>General ease and no anxiety, able to enjoy themselves and have tons of free time(mine is eaten up by work and anxiety, even free time I feel constantly uneasy and anxious now, I can't enjoy my old hobbies)
dont know how to solve, though.
Not sure if you think that, but I will post it anyway, just in case. The movie has no clear moral stance! It does not take sides at all.
What it does, is raise a question of whether the things shown in the movie are worth it, and whether they give you more damage than benefit in the long run. I enjoyed the movie a lot, I'd say that it was even my second favourite movie of the year, but it is nowhere near black and white.
Also, I think that being aware of current culture film-wise is worth it for the social gains that it can bring. Movies are a topic that is almost always relevant and everyone has seen something that can be discussed, so I second the notion that people here should watch it.
>Also, I think that being aware of current culture film-wise is worth it for the social gains that it can bring. Movies are a topic that is almost always relevant and everyone has seen something that can be discussed, so I second the notion that people here should watch it.
Not worth it, imo. I'm a social failure overall, but I dont really have a problem finding topics to discuss, despite the fact that I haven't watched a movie in like. Just steer it towards one of your interests that aren't too autistic (discussing popular science works for me) or ask them questions about their own life instead.
but if you like wathcing movies to begin with, it isn't bad I suppose
Looks like he just made a spread sheet with goals he can quantify, then had a start number and a goal number. The success is just what he ended up with at the end of the quarter divide by his goal multiplied by 100 to get a percent.