I just went out and got one of those new smart toilets everyone has been talking about. Anyone have any recommendations for some must-have apps I should install to this thing? Or just general tips would be appreciated, looking forward to running it through its paces later this evening.
>>no smart calculators
guys smart toilets are the answer to overpopulation
>shill botnet toilets
>drive around in bluetooth equipped vans
>remotely close toilet lids on unsuspecting shitters
>they starve to death
Fun fact of the day: For 25 dollars more than that calculator you posted you could buy pic related. All thanks to the absolute shit market for calculators that require more than four functions!
>clogs itself intentionally
>sprays your balls with searing hot water
>please watch this 30 second ad to flush
>automatically share your bowel movements to facebook and twitter: [Yes] [OK]
>firmware tampering detected, toilet has been remotely disabled
sorry I don't enjoy bidets i'd rather wipe with baby wipes, also fuck toilet paper at least wipes actually gets all the shit out of your ass without it feeling like sand paper
auto flush and clean and heated seat, yeah sure thank you that'd be fine but anything else fuck it
>I just went out and got one of those new smart toilets everyone has been talking about.
I'll shit in a bucket before I subject my ass to the botnet.
>Anyone have any recommendations for some must-have apps I should install to this thing?
What does a smart toilet even do?
>Or just general tips would be appreciated, looking forward to running it through its paces later this evening.
How much did it cost? Can it at least fellate you?
Yeah, I guess that's true enough. Was thinking in terms of practical applications not stuff like preventing cheating. (Though there are plenty of ways you can cheat with one of those as well, just requires slightly more effort.)
Originally because there weren't many other portable devices that could do what they did so it was legitimately a useful convenience.
Now because the market is so small they'd be fucked if they didn't charge a ridiculous markup.
They already have it. It's being tested in clinical trials as a good way to work disposable nanomachines into a person's regular diet, since most people eat a fairly predictable amount of salt each day.
If everyone got super powers, then they wouldn't be super-powers, would they?
Modern medicine and shit has gotten life expectancies to 80+. That'd be a superpower to someone born a couple hundred years ago who was expecting to die at 40 something if they were lucky
>walk in to office john
>all smart toilets
>get ready to flush
>look at remote
>see fingerprints all over screen
>release that every person in that office has smeared shit all over this thing
>nope, not even once.
This is acceptable. I'm off to buy as much as I can and I will be the greatest super an hero to ever live, Sodium Load.
> may god help you all
You can make one with a few strong magnets and some other cheap electronics you can get for around ten bucks. Works off the Earth's magnetic field. I made one as a weekend project a few months back and haven't had to spend a penny for gas since. Also makes a great conversation piece.
>actually thinking flying cars are in any way shape or form a good idea
once self-driving cars have taken over the streets, traffic is going to become really efficient. we probably won't need flying cars for a while. not to mention it can't happen until batteries take a few leaps to make them have any sort of distance (they will definitely be electric)