so I draw a black and white manga panel.
somehow its feel off...
need critique and advice I guess
It feels off because the perspecitve is too distorted and your figures don't adhere to the chosen perspective. Study perspective. Then composition because this is boring, especially for a comic panel.
The perspective is off
The characters have white aura around them
The characters don't cast shadows so they look like they're floating in the air
Shadowing doesn't make sense, it's all over the place
It looks extremely dull and flat
Again, it's boring. If you're going with traditional japanese manga style don't use shitty shadowing. Use solid blacks and whites with gradient gray. Ditch that horrible screentone. Fix the faces, they look like they're drawn by a teenager that just discovered anime/manga.
Also you need to work on the proportions of a human body.
the people look flat as fuck. Try shading a sphere and a cylinder. That's head and arms. Yours look like a piece of paper that is put towards the camera. Doesn't look like people, but a carton poster.
Your values are also horrible. Where does all that lighting come from, on top of it being in weird places? There should be VERY dark areas not illuminated by the four torches. The overall mood of the room should be dark, not white. Under the table/benches needs to be super dark, but there is no difference in shading. Are they levitating in the air?
You draw limbs like a 7 years old. Full on symbol drawing here. Build the arms and hands with cylinders, as if it were a 3d puppet, then go from there.
Clothing has completely unrealistic draping, it's not just that it's missing, it's that it's literally in positions that make zero sense. It's just wrong. Practice clothing by throwing some blankets on top of objects and see what shape and turns they make.
There's like 10cm of space between the benches and the table. Your characters' legs also disappear when passing through. Make a full figure on a different layer so you know where everything should be, you can delete parts of it later.
The floor lacks any sort of detail. It's ugly.
Your hatching "style" is ugly as hell. Why do you hatch and also fill with greys? Why do you do some and skip the other in other occasions? These choices need to follow textures, yours are random choices.
It also looks like you drew on top of your sketch, as I can see wonky construction lines on the lamps, fighting against your final shape. Do sketching in one layer and then create a new one for CLEAN and PRECISE outlines. This is especially important for furniture which has got to be smooth and symmetrical. Your vase there in the background is ugly as sin, you made the bottom flat when the top looks reasonably 3d.