I've been thinking of enlisting with the Uruk Hai after college.
Anybody here served?
I've been looking at the best options, and I see a lot of people heading to Isengard for the new Warg technician program they just started, but I hear the food's pretty bad.
Yeah I'm sure it'll be great fighting cavalry ON FOOT with a three foot long shit steel chisel grind mass produced mashitty. Give up on warg tech, they only accept small guys, and the only reason they recruit so much is because those bitches literally eat half their handlers. The others get killed by, you guessed it, cavalry.
You want to be smart? Get a National Guard posting somewhere in Mordor. Good advancement opportunity, sure there's a hell of a lot of pogs but a big guy like you will stand out more in the mordor crowd. Better chance for fun assignments and more manflesh. Just my opinion. I did a Rohan tour, shit sucked. Sure we dunked on peasants but that shitty armor they give us is way too heavy, half the guys in my unit ditched it and got fucked by bowmen. YMMV
YOU CALL URSELF AN ORK!?
WATCHYOU KNOW BOUT BEIN ORK!!??
NUFFIN!! YOU DONT KNOW NUFFIN!!
BEIN ORKS IS BOUT FIGHTIN, FIGHTIN N KILLIN
YOU LOOK SMALL
I've been using my uruk steel mashitty for years now and I've never had an issue. Maybe you got yours from some knockoff goblin shit shop
Fucking recon, I can smell you from here morgul-rat. Real fighting uruk-hai get pikes n choppas n full plate armor! Fuck those pansy cavalry guys up real good. Too far to hit with your pike? Stay in formation and let the crossbows kill them, a horse will go down right quick from a heavy quill to the flank. Lost your pike? Use the pointy hook on the choppah to de-horse a rider; try sidestepping a bit to avoid the riders momentum and your armor/shield against any glancing blows.
Dumb and a good runner? Sound like a good match for a berserker. Get a nifty zwei-hander choppah. Last batch ran slow as shit to light the damn fuses.
Will confirm, I am currently posted up on Cirith Ungol , You don't ever see any action on account of the tunnel system back there but you get to explore the mountains. That and there is better food.
Yeah how well did those fucking pikes work when you got the sun in your eyes? How many were there of you? 10,000? Routed by a handful of riders and some hippy in a bedsheet? Those crossbows do yuo good when you can shoot 1 bolt for every three the rohans loose. Fuck you, keep stroking off with the white hand while we breach tirith
Interesting fact about that shiny shirt I had a buddy who was stationed on the wall, and you want to know what one of those higher up fuckheads did with it?
He fucking threw it back to the cunts it belonged to. Shows how much the Cirith Ungol officers know
Goblin please! Those shitty Haradrim are as worthwile as a mountain troll, that doesn't know what time of day it is. Their riders can easily be shot, causing the entire Arliphant to shit the bead. Not to mention their legs can easily be taken out by a Rohanian whore with two blades, while her horse is being directed by a ground midget.
Funny thing is, the Russains use this code for orders.
I.e name a book, then quote it for a set of numbers Ie page numbers then count that many over on the alpha bet on your code sheet to shift the letters /numbers coloration to give you the cipher .
A string of numbers like say a string of post numbers time/ edited by the mods to fit whatever smalll msg they were sending to each other....
but that's just my .02
Do your time and get the experience. If you get the chance, go to Japan and see if you can get into Mr. Black's private forces. Supposedly they offer great benefits, lots of women, and have a fucking arena for entertainment too
>but that's just my .02
Fuck, I'm not finding this anywhere in these gay hobbit books. Please tell me it's not a reference to the Silmarillion, I'm only approved for so much overtime...
>Have great position commanding a company of Uruk Hai
>Raiding Rohirrim, eating meat it's all good
>Saruman hires men of the north to take over raiding
>Lazy, cowardly, always stop to rape and can't even understand black speech
>Saruman pays them better and seems to like them even more
Southrons are undercutting orcs too. All we're left to do is cut spooky trees because we're strong. Saruman is scared of FUCKING TREES
Careful you don't get stationed at the Black Gate, the dental plan for enlisted or officers there isn't too great
>Ork with black templar helmet
>Implying he ever encountered a fucking black templar
Whoever drew that needs his slap shit.
>This fucking thread.
When Saruman tells the leader the origin story of an orc to piss him off, he says orcs are a man/elf hybrid, right? Does this mean Strider and whatshername are gonna have an orc baby?