what are you wearing this year,/tlg/?
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>Where we are:
#transbians on Rizon
1. What is a transbian/trans-lesbian? → MTF transsexuals who are also lesbians
2. Isn't that just a straight guy? → No, orientation is who you go to bed with, but gender identity is who you go to bed as.
3. Are bi trans girls, welcome here? → Yes but please the keep boy drama in MTF General please!
4. Are cis lesbians/bisexuals welcome? → Yes.
5. Do trans-lesbians use their penis when they are pre-op? → Some do, some don't.
I would love to be able to pull of Rize in pic related... but that's super unrealistic and I can't find anywhere that sells a Multicam skirt.
Anyone know how to make skirts or know anyone who specializes in making skirts?
I want a custom made Multicam tactical skirt, with... like... a Kevlar liner... NIJ Level 3A skirt!
>what are you wearing this year,/tlg/?
I'll probably splurge on discount Halloween stuff as usual though.
>what are you wearing this year,/tlg/?
Nothing, I'm going to sit sit at home and give out candy while getting drunk.
being trans is suffering so eat as many bananas as possible on spiro
for real though, my diet has so many potatoes, and grains, and I love salmon, and my potassium is always fine, and I sit on my ass all day, so don't worry about it
Hydration should be taken into account even if you're using other AAs than spiro. Little to no testosterone means a much lower anabolism, and thus a heavier load on the kidneys. A low protein diet can't hurt while on HRT...
>Don't really have the money to do a decent job, though.
Goodwill for clothing, target for ELF makeup kits, get the cheapest drugstore foundation that matches your skin.
Like... less than 50 bucks, go sell some shit at a pawn shop if you really want it.
Well, it's still a good time to go shopping for a qt skirt if you are the type that gets anxious about shopping. You can just Say it's for a costume. Eh, I'm NEET right now too and I have been selling all my shit to pay for mones so I know what it's like to be broke as fug.
I just read the Greer Thread and looked at the TERFs' reddit. That was some shit. I keep seeing the accusation that when trans women are rejected by feminists we become violent aggressive men. I have been around enough trans groups to know that there really are a small minority of hun fetishists that do this, but mostly they target us not cis women; my experience has been more often that getting rejected and told it's because you have a man body leads to a lot of crying, insecurity, and possible ice cream. What have you seen?
>tldr; Do you see trans women rejected by women more often being cryballs or apists?
>also, have you seen the hun fetishist trying to prey on the young trans woman?
Yes. That's it.
But also, because I guess I'm more from a prospective about being attracted to someone physically, emotionally, mentally, socially, and not genitally. I know that's not everyone, but you can't act high and mighty while saying you aren't dating a person because you don't like their genitals.
Well, my last ex was a terf and a self-proclaimed asexual, which suited me just fine since I really loathe sex. Except that in the end, she asked for some. I obliged, but made sure it stayed over my belt. "I love you, but being in bed with you feels like doing it with a woman and that's not my thing." More or less her break-up line. I think I broke a lot of her certitudes that night, mostly that transpeople were just fantasising and that she was 100% straight. Pity, she'd fare a lot better in a relationship with a woman than she ever did with guys...
Also, I'm a feminist and it seems I'm pretty hard to clock. So I've had terfs at lesbian bars trying to get me to join them in harassing some poor non-passing "trans" guys who had to claim they loved their own dick and that feminism was crap. I don't like the type that much and a lesbian dive really is the last place for them to spout that kind of nonsense about what it means to be trans. Was nearly tempted to side with the terfs once or twice, really.
Wow, the first girl I ever dated was pretty much the same and ended it for the same reason.
As an even less reason to be in a lesbian bar, have you encountered the random straight guy wondering the place? There is one at every lesbian bar.
>At lesbian dive with friend, getting drunk on a Tuesday.
>Random straight guy keeps harassing us and being a nuisance.
>Eventually the flamboyantly gay bar tender tells him, "I don't know what you're doing. I'm not going to suck your dick and these ladies sure aren't gonna, so just stop."
>Straight guy left, but only after drunkenly hitting on an older transwoman.
Well, a straight guy wouldn't know where to find the kind of places I go to. Or even stumble upon them. Community run dives catering to the mature crowd that look nothing like bars on the outside.
Now, the party-oriented bars young lesbians go to? I can picture straight guys trying their luck there. I almost never go to those unless a friend drags me there, though. Being surrounded by drunk and horny girls that are young enough to be my daughter makes me kind of uncomfortable.
If I do anything I'll wear my silver lame overalls, a blond wig, space helmet and be a space farmer. Unfortunately I'm having two cracked molars pulled Friday morning. I doubt I'll be in any shape to do any partying all weekend.
I should invest in a junketsu for next year though.
I don't know. The only trans people I know outside the internet are FtMs, street kids, and a small handful of goths.
Hons are... interesting though. But I don't know whether to chalk that up to envy or anger. Probably both.
>Would a trans lesbian date another trans lesbian?
>If no, how can you expect a cis lesbian to date you?
See above, but people have their personal preferences too.
We need to go deeper.
I was going to go as the new harley quinn, but with the move and everything i haven't had a chance to finish the costume, so i think im going to give it a miss this year as i dont have any backups really other than generic animu schoolgirl, and i dont really fancy wearing that.
I have in the past, but these days i'd only date post-op tbh, penis just isnt for me
>how can you expect a cis lesbian to date you?
I dont expect shit from other people, i let them know after a few minutes of talking with them, and if they wanna continue, then that's cool with me.
Over a decade ago I designed a coil gun that theoretically should be able to launch a 5" shell into high orbit or possibly even escape earth's clutches totally.
This is a toy one I made for public demonstrations. It was designed with just electromagnetic enough force to shoot 1" steel bearings with about enough force to go up 4 meters vertical. Yep, quite weak, but it demonstrates a sensor controlled coil gun and it could be brought into a classroom. I demonstrated it a couple times at the Science Museum in St Paul, and at a couple science fiction conventions. The coil assembly is in the upper right. The colored wires are for the optical sensors that sense the ball's location. The thin copper wires are for the coils. I put over 200 amps through them for very short periods. If I left one of the coils on for a second it would burn up from the resistance in the wire. For each shot the first coil, which is on the longest, raises around 12C in temperature in less than a 100th of a second.
should be third coil
Here is the first coil wrapped around the cardboard tube. The tube looks shiny because I used balsa glue to stabilize the tube and hold the dividers in place. The holes you can see in the dividers are for the optical sensors.
Even without the calculations I did, this coil gun could be designed and made by any reasonably intelligent person.
>tfw non-op/pre-op trans women are literally at the bottom of the dating totem pole, no one will ever love us except other non/pre-ops and chasers
we are basically just social castoffs that people pretend to like ;-;
there's always bi-girls, or i guess very open minded lesbians, i've sexed/dated a few lesbians and bi girls and im still pre-op atm, so i wouldnt say it's a lost cause, but the dating pool is definitely smaller.
The deeper I go the scarier things I uncover. And no one believes me about any of it.
i dont think so personally, or at least my experiences dont match that, considering im engaged to a cis lez atm.
I personally think I'd be doing okay with dating if not for the agoraphobia. It's the lack of being out and about that kills my dating life more then anything.
Bigirls are viable. Pangirls if you're okay with them work amazingly.
I have before, I would again if it worked out well I suppose. But I admit I doubt I could date a trans-girl early or pre-hrt.
Pretty sure I'm not finishing my costume in time, been sick the past several days. Phooey. I'll still keep working on it for fun though
I've never got quite the blatant hitting on people that aren't interested thing but it happens so ridiculously often. I just don't get guys like that.
>because you have a man body leads to a lot of crying, insecurity, and possible ice cream. What have you seen?
I don't think I've actually spoke with someone who got enraged over it, yea sorrow/tears/dysphoria seems to be the norm.
yeah i can imagine agoraphobia is a big burden, i couldnt imagine having that.
and ah yeah, i completely forgot about pan girls, my bad.
>I just don't get guys like that.
i just think it depends on the area and situation, i've had straight guys hit on me in lesbian bars before, people waiting for me to walk home alone after work in the early mornings etc. like i said, depends on the area.
and yeah, im going to keep working on my costume, i'm also working on a scarlet witch cosplay, but im not very far on it atm.
I've accepted that I'm going to be alone until the day I die at this point.
Only three and a half more years until I'm a 30 year old virgin who has literally never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. :D
Idk, if I rlly liked someone I'd totally try tho I'm dysphoric enough on my own and Idk how comfortable I'd be with it
I don't "expect" anyone to date me
actually last weekend when my partner and I went to some event things there was this one guy being kinda creepy complimenting me on my dress twice and kinda following me into a corner asking where I lived and stuff before my partner got between us
I'm not looking forward to tomorrow. Two cracked molars get pulled. I don't know if the oral surgeon or assistants are trans friendly or not so my stomach is tied in knots.
In other news, I was gendered female by a the gal in the drive through
I'm not too worried about how everyone see's me, what matters most is how I and those closest to me see me
It certainly makes dating hard, but such is life.
There's also definitely varying levels of being hit on. Guys who are polite and take no are awesome, I can respect the courage to try (outside of maybe at a les bar/chatroom). But in general the skeevy ones always weird me out (ie the ones who don't take no for an answer)
Ouch, best of wishes Syndie
>no one will ever love us except other non/pre-ops and chasers
Not with that attitude they won't.
I'm about split between bi girls, lesbians, and pansexuals though as far as serious relationship things go. But y'know. You have to like yourself a bit first. That usually seems to be the most important thing.
Well yeah, but then you get wizard powers. Then you can magic yourself into a qt girl.
That... does not sound fun. D:
Hope everything goes as well as it can though.
Did you update your character sheet?
Well the newest edition of Dungeons and Dickgirls has a new method of casting it says. Instead of using enchanted horse urine like you used to have to do, now you have to use estrogen pills to enhance your latent magical girl powers. As an MTF wizard you can cast HRT twice per day by rolling 1d8 for dosage.
Just make sure to change your charisma score accordingly with every critical, of course.
Hmm. Halloween I am working, and I do totally get to dress up in a costume for it. I am going to be doing something, but I have not decided what yet.
However, I totally know what I am doing for Goth Industrial Fetish night this Sunday! I went with a girl friend shopping today and got my outfit all set. It's gonna be a bit risque for me so far, but it will definitely be super exciting.
I got a black and white lace bustier, along with a black miniskirt and black tights. I also got a whole ensemble of earrings, necklaces and bracelets going as well on this trip.
I also reconnected with an old girlfriend and she is totally gonna be there at the club too, like I knew she would be, as it totally was her kind of scene, and it is taking place in the town she lives in. Totally gonna meet her and have a great time, along with the other friends I am going with.
Anyone remember the post about a girl called Alex and that I fell for her and cryed on the train home Cos I thought I would never see her again. Well she's sleeping right next to me now, and the connection we share is really fucking deep.
4th laser today still draining though not as bad as other 3 were on me, amount of pain besides upperlip and few other spots has really gone down though it was a lot more tolerable in a lot of areas on my face.
Yes of course I would.
I must be really lucky then to not be in that boat.
Also not planning to do anything for halloween, I've felt too old for it for a long time.
>says she'd date a transgirl
>doesn't want piv, barely knows how to give blowies
Ah, so you're one of those lesbians that make me waste my time instead of straight-up saying they don't want me. Thank god I only date bi girls
Yeah... I can't believe it either, she's the coolest girl in the room and was a stringent lesbain when I met her, Cos I only dated guys before she just thinks she turned a straight girl gay.
>want to give piv
Ewww. I never had any interest in doing that pre-HRT, let alone now.
Iktf. No car and don't know where to meet people really. I suppose that's what the internet is for though.
>I don't think even magic could make me cuter, haha.
Ftfy. You look alright.
I dunno. I like piv or pi-anything really, but it's not the end all be all of sex either. And sex isn't the end all be all of a relationship.
Cuddling is more fun.
Pre hrt australian here. Feeling frustrated and let down by the system, how do i find a psych who can actually help me? I saw a psychiatrist for 8 years until the end of 2013. She told me i was too immature at 16 to 19 to make a decision about my gender. Saw a psychologist for 10 weeks in early 2014, he was supposed to be a gender specialist, every time i brought up gender he deflected. Current psychotherapist also keeps deflecting from the topic.
Living close enough to sydney to travel frequently and conveniently there. Starting to lose any hope of ever finding help.
I just don't like vaginal penetration at all, dick or dildo, it doesn't matter.
I'll admit I've never given a blowjob and wouldn't be chomping at the bit to do it, but if it'd make my girlfriend happy, I'd try my best.
My plan is to be a basic bitch. I spent a while building the outfit, and I'm so ready!
I'd date a trans girl, but they have to follow the same standards I set any cis woman to.
Be sexually active, don't be dysphoric all the time and ruin everything and make life shitty when it doesn't have to be, don't be crazy, don't look ugly or like a man, and don't be that annoying fucking trans girl that constantly makes me feel like shit because I'm passing and look good now. That fucking shit is so annoying.
If we get along well, you're attractive, and fill all the requirements, then I don't care whats in your pants tbh.
I've dated too many early trans people though in the past due to my co-dependence and I've had to just say enoughs enough. I've already gone through all that self figuring out and drama and shit, I don't want to guide someone else through it as they kick and scream the entire fucking time.
Seriously though I don't understand why people always fall back on piv sex. There's so many other things you can do, every couple is different and will find what they enjoy.
Good for you anon.
I don't remember it but congratulations anon, I'm so glad it worked out for you
Sometimes the timing is right, othertimes not so much. Deep breath anon, and good luck
Oh glad you're doing better. Yea I always found laser wore me out, no idea why though. I generally had to nap.
>Cuddling is more fun.
I'm a big fan of curling up, whispering sweet nothings and gentle kisses
Aw thank you, I hope your night is well
I'm not a fan of suicide and I don't support it, but if thats your decision I hope its quick and painless. The... weight thing is something fixable though, as is the lack of friends. SSI depends on why you have it though
Your best bet might be to look for local support groups
I never said I identified with the term lol. Too much feminist bullshit attached to it. Technically I'm bisexual, but I just say that I'm gay and proceed to laugh at the ensuing confusion.
Yes, I couldn't get to sleep yesterday so I stayed up and ended up passing out at like.. 2 pm and I woke up at 10... ugh, this is awful. I hate when it happens but I don't want to take anything to put me to sleep.
I'm a kiwi, both our systems are copied from the poms I think. My gender/sexuality therapist mentioned she'd generally have to do 5-10 sessions before she'd have enough info to do the profile you need for a hormone consult, and she wants me to keep seeing her while I start, although less frequently. I've got my endo consult at the end of November, after maybe 10 times seeing her, but some of that is dealing with my other issues.
you have to recompile yourself from source, cd /usr/ports/people/lain && make config, then untick the male box and select the female box, then make install clean, you'll be as good as new!
(if only it worked like that ;-;)
if it makes you feel any better you're not alone, I'm totally 100% okay with owning a penis
we'll cuddle some day if we're ever in Boston at the same time I promise!
>I've already gone through all that self figuring out and drama and shit, I don't want to guide someone else through it as they kick and scream the entire fucking time.
Don't you think that's awful selfish? People probably put up with you and tried to help you when you were kicking and screaming, and you don't feel like doing the least bit of support for someone else in return? I get that it's hard, nothing worth doing in life is hard, I have a friend that I love more than anyone in the world right now and although there's been a lot of crying and we ever almost stopped talking to each other she's doing a lot better now and it's so rewarding to see that. Plus, I know she'd do the same for me.
>I'm a big fan of curling up, whispering sweet nothings and gentle kisses
Why haven't we done this IRL yet milly ;-;
sometimes, nyquil works great for that though, or benzos, or both!
What if I'm so disconnected from my body and my emotions that the only way I can express my feelings is by roiding out before collapsing into a puddle of tears?
D-does that make me a "hun fetishist"?!?!?!
>tfw wasn't born Brazilian
Will hormones ever make me as cute as Kaya?
I'm now officially a Trans Lesbian. this is me and my bff and we kinda sorta hooked up at a party.
ok, so she sucked my dick but that's about it. honestly i think she was toying with me. she offered to have sex but it never happened.
what i take away from this is that i atleast have the ability to like girls sexually? i may just be bi.
I have to work holloween. :C
I just got off work and the entire time I just spaced out. My coworkers noticed and the majority of responses where as follows:
>Yo, did you drink soup?
>Did you get to make soup yesterday?
>You should get a cup noodle during break...
>After work, go get some soup...
And all because I was talking about learning how to make cream soups last week...
This is why you should sleep before work... spacing out because you can't focus just results in a bunch of people asking you about soup. I don't even know...
>We need to go deeper.
The deeper you'll go, the higher to risk of you missing will rise. There are many cellars, basements and/or trap doors. You should be careful, to whom you knock.
The days of murderers are long gone.
There's plenty of monsters, so we are taught.
So be careful, less you wish a ravishment or not.
I'm seeing a therapist. 1st session was today. Our sessions are only 50 minutes long, so covering ground is going to be difficult.
When should I let them know that I'm unsure about my gender/sexual orientation? I mean, there's a laundry list of issues I need to work through but should that be a priority?
if I found a qt lesbian who was into me, I'd be totally down, even if she had absolutely no interest in piv or anything like that
Hormones will probably shrink it in due time anyway, and eventually there's surgery
Ignore these posters, most trans girls don't really care
Dunno if my insurance will cover doubles.
I was told that I should try anti-depressants, which I don't want to do. I don't like things that upset the way I think. It feels fragile enough.
Theres a genderfluid club a city over that I want to visit. They have a schoolgirl wednesday night that sounds fun.
I'm just expecting it to be dead and empty. Or that I'll get there and be dead and empty.
PIV sex is kinda a default for those that can do it together. It usually satisfies the needs of both partners if done moderately well.
>laser wore me out
It does damage that needs to be repaired.
>>Cuddling is more fun.
>I'm a big fan of curling up,
I'm turning into a cuddle slut. I always loved it, but now it is an imperative versus just being really nice before.
Especially when my restless legs act up. I used to have other things that interrupted it, but after enough EMDR sessions I don't wakeup as much in the middle of the night.
When I want to sleep, I'll silently chant to myself "sleep now, wake up at 8:00am." until I fall asleep. It helps a lot.
Damn! That's what it is. I was trying to use configure and it wasn't working. It really sucks when the developer didn't provide any documentation.
>I'm totally 100% okay with owning a penis
Yeah, but slavery is illegal.
Get thee into therapy for psychological trauma. Find somebody who knows EMDR.
Yeah, it goes by way to fast. I could have used 2 hours for my last session. We did have a good EMDR session. I have been feeling better after it.
(pic) Really, I want my 16yo body back so I can transition from it.
>tfw man hips will never let me be a feminine muscular
>inhouse no longer accepts debit or credit cards
>Yeah, but slavery is illegal.
Hey, it's a mutual relationship between the two of us
>Yeah, it goes by way to fast. I could have used 2 hours for my last session
Can I just have like, a live in therapist, someone who teaches me how to live again?
That word alone makes me sure you can make it. Possibly without a therapist.
The consensus about me at this point from both shrinks who have me on watch (the psychiatrist is a 84 year old lady who's worked at the clinic since it was founded and has seemingly no life outside of it, so, yeah, pretty much live in. Not joking, they had to force her to take vacations for the first time this year because issues about compliance with work Law were raised...) is that I have yet to live in the usual, social sense of the word. Neither is quite sure that I'll ever be able to since all the talk and medication they've thrown at me hasn't made a dent in my anhedonia.
So no "again" from me. Just swinging from tedium to pain and back until my body gives up... Or maybe Schopenhauer was right and that's actually all there is to life. Except I know pleasure does exist. Or do I? Could pleasure be the second greatest lie humanity has told itself, second only to the existence of gods, and everyone's just fooling themselves. Both will only ever be equally numinous notions for me, it seems, anyway.
So if I'm to believe in pleasure, I probably should put faith in divinity. Who should I worship then? Hecate, Eris, Kali? Nevermind the logorrhea, I'm just knee deep in tedium right now.
Bully for you, I like my girlcock and don't want to date someone who likes me *despite* it, but *with* it.
happy halloween, everyone !!
i was going to go as a fairy princess this year, but the wings i bought weren't agreeing with me and also it's going to be 50 degrees tonight, so i ditched them bc i need to be able to wear a jacket
so i ended up being a beacon of sin and debauchery instead
anyway take care everyone! i luv u all
Happy Halloween all!
I'm probably just not dressing up, didn't do much work on my costume but having fun with the little bits I've done. Then again my halloween is gonna consist of trick or treating so it's not a major thing
For me it's just kind of there. It's an unfortunate fact of life to deal with. That said.... I would prefer a lover that doesn't cringe seeing it. It's probably one of the main reasons I always lean towards bi/pan girls over lesbian girls. I have enough body issues on my own, I want a lover to -like- my body y'know?
I've been hit on enough to know this is true.
Slept a ton, feeling much better and ready to go ToTing tonight
If its a major deal for you, there is such a thing as hip implants
I am, and have been for awhile. Honestly once I get the last things done (Name change and such), while I may not go deep stealth, I plan to just not-talk-about trans stuff outside of select people/areas.
>It usually satisfies the needs of both partners if done moderately well.
True enough I suppose, even pre-hrt I always found it kind of dull though. Post-hrt that makes a lot more sense
Find ways to work with your body, there are styles for all body types. And you can always save for FFS is the ugly is a major thing for you.
>tfw tooth hole is feeling better
>still need pain killers.
Cool. I need to figure out the insurance and money thing and feel confident I have the money so I can feel comfortable scheduling it.
I managed to get to sleep, but only slept fitfully.
(pic) while teaching.
>live in therapist
>someone who teaches me how to live again?
I need that too.
>I always found it kind of dull though
For awhile I even lost pleasure from masturbation and sex. They're fun again. I was throughly despondent and suicidal a few years ago. I feel I can live again. There is hope. EMDR set me free. I'm wondering about combining it and ket for some of the more stuck feelings and body memories.
>bad hips in family
>my hips are marginal
>tfw many relatives on dad's side have had hips replaced.
No kids ever visit the farm. At the parent's, which is where I was after the tooth removal, we got 38 before the rain hit. That is a record for them. It's been slowly going up.
Thing is, I've always been that way. To a point I considered it perfectly normal and largely still do so. For the rest, that was a brain fart. The wet kind. You take a somewhat normal strand of thought and unravel and take apart all its filaments to their absurd conclusion until all that remains is a sad little ball of lint. Now that I think of it, brain hairball would be more accurate. Other orifice, just as unpleasant. Lint in the umbilicus of Limbo...
>tfw starve self and never take care of hair for months cause of depression
How fucked am I?
I mean my hair is a right mess right now, and pretty coarse all the way through.
Is it salvageable?
I don't want to be a bedroom hermit forever ;_;
>Don't give them an hourly cash rate
maybe I should start doing that... putting an ad in the newspaper or something... "looking for friends to do all sorts of things together, will pay hourly"
>tfw ex hates me
>tfw still pine for her
how am i supposed to live
It has a lot to go for it. I wish I lived closer to my friends so they could kidnap me more often.
Start taking care of it. I brush mine as soon as I get up every morning, and after every time it has been out in the wind. If you have tangles, brush the end first, and work your way up slowly to get the tangles out. For washing, I use one of Pantene's shampoo plus conditioner line. If I have time, I dry it under a towel, but often I don't have the time. I never take a hair dryer to it.
Being nice, interested in similar hobbies, and there is maybe more important.
it's been a month and a half
i have a friend visiting and from the back she looks exactly like her except with darker hair and it makes me want to die sometimes
i smelled a shirt she left over after a month and i screamed in horror
i think this unrequited love is giving me autism
>Start taking care of it
Yeah, start learning how to take care of it early so it's just routine when it's long.
I recommend not using a 2 in 1 since you should be conditioning Way more than shampooing.
Get a de-tangler
Use a cotton t-shirt to dry your hair instead of a towel because they can cause breakage, you don't really notice how rough you are with a towel when drying but it's bad for the hair. I suggest a t-shirt since you probably have a few cotton ones laying around but you could also buy specific cotton towels for hair.
My hair gets dust and dirt in it from the farm. In town or a city, there would be much less dust and dirt.
I never rub my hair with the towel. I just wrap it up in it, then wrap the towel on top of my head. The towel then slowly absorbs the water in the hair. A t-shirt would weigh less and might be more comfortable.
hi mtfg wasn't very receptive
who wants to be dp'd by me and my friends' gts
Well, I got to experience something new today. The depths of sadness, frustration, and anger that being stood up can bring. The night I planned for tonight, that my friends ASKED me to go to . . . is not happening.
I had to physically track them down after a 3 day disappearance with no response to texts or calls. Apparently the night we had planned was completely forgotten, and so was just not happening.
I'm pretty much a mess right now. I am not used to feeling this angry and sad at the same time. This is a very ugly feeling . . .
That sounds irritating Cali, I'm sorry that happened to you. Deep breaths and have a good cry, sometimes weird things happen but if its a first I wouldn't be too upset.
No thank you
This >>5159089 is probably a good idea. Especially if she hates you. It'll hurt but just walk away and give yourself time to heal
Yes, I'd suggest Biotin supplements or at least a strengthening conditioner. If you use shampoo regularly, consider cutting back, and fortifying oils are a good call. Also when able go to a salonist to see how much of the ends are dead and need to be trimmed.
I had/have 6 inches of dead hair, but I'm losing over time. Took off about 2 inches before summer and I'll lose another 2 inches this month. Most Salonists can give great advice and help you find a solution that works with you.
Thanks. I've been sitting around and talking to friends for a while, and it is slowly helping me level out a bit.
This is not the first time I got ditched by them, but it has never been this bad. We planned this night for 3 weeks, and I was asked to go by them!
It is fine though. I've made alternate plans. My night won't be ruined, but I am still very emotionally charged. It was so frustrating . . .
Yeah, this >>5161607
I have no clue how much is to much, and it can easily be different from person to person.
There is something in hydrocordone I don't clear properly. It keep affecting men for 36+ hours after the last one was taken.
was me without trip.
It's one of those days. I napped a bit and had more asylum memories come back. more fodder for EMDR sessions.
>tfw this isn't just an AGP fetish
>tfw I'm not just a drag queen
>tfw I'm not just a femme boy
>tfw I'm actually trans
>tfw I actually want to be a woman
Is it normal to feel like the bottom just dropped out of your life?
Thanks, that's actually the nicest post I've ever gotten on 4chan
lmao r u me
I doubt myself so frequently with everything so I guess it's no surprise that I did it with my gender.
Ah well, good luck to us all.
>tfw looking through your past and finding tons of "signs"
>tfw you realize you literally never even gave a fuck about being muscular or hairy, and are now actively terrified of these things.
Most trans women I've talked to where bisexual to be honest.
Just don't overindulge and you should be fine
Yes, I've never understood people thinking being trans. It's a hard, painful, stressful life with a goal that's ultimately finally feeling at home in your own body. But heavens that final goal is so worth it, I hope you find it Anon
While tempting, I don't do LDR's and I sincerely doubt you're local. Thank you kindly for the interest.
Actually, I met an ex off 4chan. We were fairly happy but it was an ldr thing as well as a fwb situation. After about two years she wanted something more serious but neither one of us wanted to move, and I won't get serious over a ldr. We've been friends for.... Goodness I wanna say about 7 years now? And she's posted in tlg a couple times if I remember right.
Really? I heard they where working on better domestic travel trains but haven't heard much else.
>finally decide to buy first pair of womens' jeans
>find one you like, that will fit, and is cheap
>price goes up $10 while looking at other stuff
>can't buy them now out of spite
old transbians baka
I rather like the thought of a daylong train ride gazing upon the scenery. It seems sweet and romantic.
And yes, a bit old, such is life. We all age, I'd rather do so gracefully then try to deny it.
I... do not blame you in the slightest. That sounds extremely frustrating. I'm sorry anon.
I'm not sure, Perhaps.
Goodnight everyone, I'm unfortunately quite tired.
Ah, sorry I'm not overly keen on giving out my exact location on 4chan. Perhaps one day I'll tell you if that would work out.
That's why I like the idea of them modernizing trains, I know there are plans for a massive railroad from WA down to CA all the way to FL and up to NY, but I'm not sure if it will ever come to fruition.
>tfw ill never get her back
>tfw shes living the life and I was abandoned and left in the dirt
>tfw hollow shitty shell of my former self
How do I stay determined to fight for my happiness /tlg/ ;_;
This is so hard
>And yes, a bit old, such is life. We all age, I'd rather do so gracefully then try to deny it.
it's just hard aging without getting much out of life... so much time wasted... things I can never forget.
get o w n e d
Further thinking and talking with a friend, we determined most, of the lesbians and bisexuals we know aged naturally. It was around half the het women that fought it. This is among those that could easily afford top quality face lifts.
The few les and bi gals that did all were still making their income from their beauty, i.e. acting and modeling.
unless you live near an expensive airfare city like Des Moines. From here it's often cheaper to go to Kansas City.
5 years ago that would have been easy for me. Now, no.
I can think of many things worth vastly more than $400 a month. Love is one of them.
Well, I am doing alot better today. I had a girl friend come over and have a movie night with me, and she just cuddled with me until I stopped crying and fell asleep.
Yesterday wasn't fun, but I feel like I must've needed it on some level. I didn't even know what I was still crying about at the end, but the tears wouldn't stop. I love my friends so much though, they were all there for me.
It may be free, but when reciprocated the value returned is immense.
Sounds good to me
Well to be honest, I'd absolutely be okay with plastic surgery. I just meant aging gracefully as in not pretending I'm ten years younger or acting like a teenager when I have no desire to.
Sometimes you need to cry and purge it out anon. Cry for what you've lost and realize that you might find it, or likely better, in the future if you continue to look for it.
No, absolutely. It really hurts especially when I think of all the times I could have enjoyed myself had I been true to myself much earlier. But.... nothing's going to change that. I try to focus on what I -can do-, because that's what I'm fighting so hard for.
NEET / Disabled myself. I don't have much spending money but it works out for me.
It's likely because for straight girls, the goal shoved on them is to 'marry a rich guy'. Which isn't as big a deal (especially in the les community)
Sounds like an awesome time, and a great friend!
>goal shoved on them
be a pretty arm ornament.
if you are not pretty you are not worth anything.
Once you start questioning social norms, the more likely you will question and ditch multiple ones of them. Lesbian, and bisexuals have already broken their first, and it's a dozy.
>I just meant aging gracefully as in not pretending I'm ten years younger or acting like a teenager
I have to admit that's kinda what I'm doing and I wouldn't really want to do it differently, I still want to experience that kind of life.
only problem is that I'm not really in a situation to like, actually do it though.
I am seriously lacking in life experience to actually act my age.
>tfw they widened my jaw when young.
I was looking at costs to NYC. It's about $300 for 1 stop, and $500 for non stop round trips.
K keeps reminding me it only costs a couple thousand to send the small jet to pick me up, but it is very close to it's max range. On the other hand it can land and refuel at airports only 30 or 45 minutes away. Not 1.5 hours away. I wish I could get away from the boat anchor more often...
>date another trans lesbian?
Depends on how you define 'lesbian'. I only date other trans women (about 90%). I don't find cis women unattractive, but I'm not really into vaginas. I wouldn't date a trans woman who already had a vagina or really desired one. I wouldn't necessarily leave someone over it either, but I can't lie that I would be less attracted to a partner who got the op while we were dating.
I feel like I've always been this way though. If I'd opted to stay a guy I would've probably been a flaming faggot who dated other flamers.
Typical heterosexual male agp response. I mean, would you call a cis lesbian a chaser for only seeking real vaginas? Or a hetero man who also only fucks real vaginas? It's ok to have preferences. Don't let that bother you.
I don't want to sleep with someone who has or intends to obtain an inverted cocksock. Everything about that sounds really gross.
I also don't expect anyone else to fuck me who isn't ok with me or my attractions. Which is the biggest difference between a 'chaser' like me and cotton ceiling pushing agp fetishists.
>sorting large tin of old change
>Less than 1" down in 10" tall tin.
>tfw find bicentennial quarter.
Few NH state toll tokens.
Lots of Canadian coins. I was traveling to Canada a lot for work.
Many old hair ties.
>tfw first quarter I looked at the date was 1965, the year I was born.
I was watching a recording of the Mexico F1 Grand Prix, but now that is done.
I've been hoping others show up.
Yeah, I'm bored. I checked the pennies for obvious old ones.
4 wheat pennies in the top inch
1928, 1929?, 1944, and 1958?
all in poor shape.
Back when I used cash, I just dropped the coins into my pocket. At the end of the day I emptied my pockets into a bowl, coins, keys, wallet, etc.. I'd only put a few quarters back in my pocket for parking meters. Every so often I'd dump the bowl into this tin that is about a foot square.
It's just a couple of people on this board that post shit like that, you can easily tell by the writing style. Most people irl will have enough problems on their own to worry about shit like that.
It's only a small vocal few here on 4chan and a few TERFs in irl. Most don't care.
What genitals my partner has doesn't mean much to me. I've been deeply in love with both males and females.
I'm sure I'd still be able to love a person if they had mixed genitalia and secondary sexual characteristics.
On the other hand, I'm sure at this point I'd be much happier with a vagina rather than the dick I have. As I get further and further along in transition, I'm more often having times when it feels like it's there. It's frustrating because as soon as I pay attention to the feels I feel the dick there. I also still get mildly depressed if I thrust.
are you kidding? everyone cares about transbians. they're disgusting. they're all AGP fetishists and don't deserve any respect.
that's why you always end up seeing transbians with other transbians. they rub their dicks together when they play dressup. it's fucking disgusting.
I'm just hanging around, and enjoying a few days off I've gotten. Putting some space between me and my friend for now. I'm not furious or anything, but I am very disappointed and as far as I am concerned they need to make this up to me if they want things to be the way they were before after blowing me off for 3 days and then ruining plans we made for the last 3 weeks.
Otherwise, I am just exercising and relaxing today.
>filtered by a hon
LOL you need serious help.
True enough, as I learned more and more about myself I stopped caring as much about others views.
... though the idea of being eye candy for someone is admittedly appealing.
Well it'll come in time, just be yourself and work on being happy in my mind. At least that's how I view life.
Unfortunately denying your sexual orientation doesn't work out so well. And you could always be bi.
As another trip...
>Fucking attention whore.
I realize to many I am, perhaps in some ways I am. Sorry Anon, just who I am I suppose.
Personally, I think like any group painting with a broad brush never works. I generally look for personal opinions, not 'how everyone feels'. That said I find most people who dislike me because of the T thing do it more because I'm trans then because I'm into women. Though... yea there's a fair bit of confusion it seems on why would I transition to being a woman so I could date women. Thankfully most people 'get it' pretty quickly when explained.
Sounds like a nice day
It becomes pretty important to consider, yes.
That's bullshit, being a lesbian hurts the validity of your transition in the eyes of others. "Why become a woman if you still wanna fuck women? Must be a sick fucking fetish after all." Maybe thats just lodged in my head because the women in my life expressed this opinion to me after coming out due to my heterosexuality at the time.
That is how I normally identify.
>being eye candy for someone is admittedly appealing
Downright fucking addictive I would say. Arm ornament, I could do without, but that too can be addictive.
I do have an objective in mind.
Sorry that you totally misunderstand the reason for transitioning. It has nothing to do with whom one gets into bed with let alone what their sexual activities are. It has everything to do with the gender of one's spirit. I'm sick and tired of continuing this charade of acting like a male when my spirit never was one.
>they rub their dicks together
I bet you are homophobic too. Gay me rub their dicks together. How is it different when transbians do?
I'm honestly jealous of all of you for having the guts and dedication to do what you do. I came really close when I was younger but decided that suffering through being a man was better than suffering through trying to pass, HRT and laser etc, the opinions society would have of me, and the difficulty of finding a partner. (The latter especially because I'd keep my dick and still want to use it.)
Why not make one? Those kinds of skirts are actually really easy, I used to date a cosplayer and watched her make them in less than 6 hours on multiple occasions.
I thought I could be happy being a man and pretty much repressed it for a good decade or so beyond when I first realized I wanted to be a woman. It was... not fun. So I transitioned a bit later then is ideal, but I'm much happier for it.
Its definitely a surprisingly common ignorant belief that I've never understood, especially from the gay/les crowds. But it is what it is
It's absolutely swoonworthy to know your partner thinks you're so attractive they want to show you off in my mind. Then again perhaps its a low self-esteem thing to like the thought of that.
sorry I missed this
>Anyone know how to make skirts or know anyone who specializes in making skirts?
>I want a custom made Multicam tactical skirt, with... like... a Kevlar liner... NIJ Level 3A skirt!
OK, Kevlar can be sewn with most sewing machines if you don't need super strength thread.
This is a good tutorial >>5171130 except for one thing. Waist length for calculating the pleat length is only good for some types of skirt. Sometimes you need to use the hip measurement instead. That makes it a bit more complex because the pleats need to get deeper as they go from the hips to the waist, and this changes based on where it is around the body. To do this the easy way, get a friend to help. Put on a pencil skirt. Use safety pins to attach the pleats where they are supposed to lay around the hips. Above the hips, fold them deeper to suit the body's curve, and pin together to maintain at the waist level. Do this round the whole skirt. Now do the ironing to set the pleats. Again put it up on your body, and fold and pin the waist band in place.
The other issue with the tutorial is they assume a simple tube skirt. The skirt you wish to make looks to have some circle to it. That makes it more complex. Look for a pattern to work from. Sewing stores will likely have them. If they don't, it's a poor store, go to a different one.
Get a bunch of pictures of the one you wish to copy. Figure out it's length on your body. Add in for the hem. If you want it to quickly swing out when you spin, you can add skirt weights. They used to be a cloth shoelace with lead weights in it. You sew it in place inside the hem. With current anti lead laws, I bet the metal has changed.
I have this suspicion we girls are programmed to like being shown off. Part of marking your claim on your partner.
I just wish society would stop butting their heads into our personal lives and let us transition and live in peace. At least things have improved a lot over the past three decades. If things were still like they were in the '70s and '80s, I bet I'd have suicided two winters ago. I wouldn't feel there was a chance.
I mean, at first it took a bit of dedication to keep with it, but once I got into it I found myself more and more eagerly adhering to what I wanted to do differently because I felt my life getting better at I did. I found exploring makeup, clothing and hair-styling to be very interesting, along with voice development and pitch control.
Pressure to pass was definitely a thing for a while, but I found it become less so as time has gone by. I came to learn that it is really too much stress wondering it I pass or not, because in the end I am still just gonna be myself. I'm not being treated like a guy when I am out. I am not being called sir or anything. Going to the bathroom is never an issue. Do I pass? Maybe. If I don't I can't tell, but either way it can only get better as I work on laser and build out my wardrobe, and my HRT slowly does work for me.
As for the worries of how society would view you, that really is up to you and how you present yourself. I came out very publicly because I work in a very visible location in a small town, where everyone knows me. Some people were a bit weird about it, but TONS of people were very awesome about it. I have not even yet had a single negative encounter, but I have hit the point where customers are starting to hit on me.
To this day, I usually have girls and women coming through telling me how much happier and beautiful I look and giving me hugs, and I know it is true. I've gotten to know alot of them much better, because that was sort of an ice-breaker for many.
Not much point in trying to sew kevlar into it, you have to have so many layers of the stuff to actually act as armor that it'd make the pleats impossible and the skirt rigid and heavy.
DESU for me there's more than society and stuff, too. The woman I'd be if I transitioned isn't the girl I am in my head, and I think I'd almost feel worse looking in the mirror after that than I do now. I crossplayed a few times when I was in my teens, with the help of friends who were great at makeup and hair, and passed really well, so I have a pretty good idea of what I'd look like too.
I actually came out to a therapist and some close friends back then, but got cold feet and reevaluated things, and 12 years down the line or so I don't think it's a choice I could make. My face and body have changed so much that it'd be much harder now, too, and I'm also afraid I'd end up being one of those people who goes crazy with plastic surgeries until I looked like an alien or something.
If somebody invents a ray or a pill or something that actually turns guys into girls, or if we get robot bodies like Ghost in the Shell and I can switch into a female one, I'll probably do it, but I don't think I could ever be satisfied with myself with the current way things are.
Well, I waited about 12 years to transition from when I initially started to as well. I have very successfully transitioned at 30 so far, and it is getting better constantly for me. My friend network is growing, and I've never felt so alive.
I think its more the focus on 'this person thinks I'm worth bragging about to their friends' then anything.
That could be it, It could also be why I like hickeys and scratch marks during lovemaking.
Absolutely. I started just before turning 28, I'm turning 31 this month and honestly feel so much happier. I just need to tackle my agoraphobia.
>Implying I feel the need to prove my validity to people that don't get such a simple thing as that sexuality is not bound explicitly to your gender.
I don't care about stupid people.
You can ask the same people if they would be comfortable to spend the rest of their lives as the other gender, with everything that that entails.
The only (cis) people that would answer "yes" on this questions are the ones that will never get it anyway so it's not worth trying to explain yourself to them ever. Seriously, stop giving a shit what mentally challenged people think about you.
Thanks for the chuckle m8, you never fail to entertain me with your predictability. >muh AGP
Maybe it's just not as strong of an urge for me as it was for you guys. It's there in the back of my head from time to time, but it's far from the most pressing concern I have in my life.
I think I'm like, 55/45 on which I'd rather be. To me, that 10% difference isn't big enough to undertake a radical life change. I also still haven't entirely convinced myself that it's not a fetish. (For me personally, I mean, not for trans in general.)
Oh for me it wasn't a matter of which I would rather be. What was holding me back was simply being way too shy and introverted to even try. But I never could identify as a guy at all. It was just that I didn't feel ready to do as a woman either, so I mostly just hid away my true self and never did anything.
Brazil's crime rate is indeed very high, but no matter what country you live in, most people don't ever get murdered. You can have a perfectly lovely time living in Brazil even with its social problems.
(Also, Latin America isn't a monolith, Chile has a lower murder rate than the US.)
My nightmares are getting increasingly outlandish. Where could dreaming about being a mercenary in the Reagan years and blowing up half a city in middle Europa even come from? Only common point between all that nonsense is that there's always someone I care for that dies and there's nothing I can do about it. Worst thing, I wake up from those with all the weariness and pain I've been through in the dream. Don't know how long I'll be able to take that. Waking up more tired than when you went to sleep isn't any good.
This morning I woke up in a dream where I was making a surprise visit and delivering chocolate to my sweetie. I bribed the receptionist with one box, and went back to her office bearing the other box. The fun part is I have absolutely no clue who this sweetie is. It's obvious we are close because we French kiss with mouths full of chocolate.
Every now and then I still have a dream where I'm tourniquetting an arm that is missing most of the flesh. At least it hasn't happened that much lately. I never want to see that dream again. I tends to leave me upset most of the day.
I often call nasty dreams bone crushers. An author friend uses the term in some of her novels. It's very appropriate.
On a different topic. I had an EMDR session at my therapy appointment last week where I delved into some very early memories and feelings, and have been finding it relatively easy to be happy ever since.
I think you only have that problem if you're not passible, I've had no trouble finding people to date male or female, I've asked and they say it's nee and they aren't too botherd about it
Those are Like unicorns desu
I'm such a pussy in my transition I would be ready happy if I found a girl like that so long as I can stay butch somewhat I never what to be a girly girl. Where do I find them?
Can confirm. I probably wouldn't have transitioned if I didn't meet a girl with a feminization fetish.
Well, if those crushed my bones, there'd be only dust in there by now. Last night's dreams involved praying mantises who wanted to unionize, planes disappearing in mid-flight and a lengthy discussion with a blue skinned woman over drinking bowls of warm blood about Jungian archetypes and the lack of meaning of worldly matters. Also, overflowing toilets. And a cigar-smoking orangutan driving a truck.
Sometimes it feels like Jodorowsky, Lynch and Tarkovsky conspire to write the script to those...
>tfw surfing around for cute girls after helping at PFLAG meeting.
>slight chub, but still 8/10. 10/10 because I really love tummies and she had just finished her surgeries, and she was rather timid in a cute way.
>bring her home after scoring a date.
>start taking off the clothes
>her top is off!
>suddenly instant drive loss.
>surgeon gave her pointing to the sky high nipples.
Now this was a lucky date, I haven't had many partners, but all the nipples I keep seeing, seem so unnatural. Like really, 38DD with nipples praising the sun. Aren't natural boobs supposed to be pointing more down with size increase?
Mine aren't pointing down, but they have a downward slope since they are natural.
>the haircut ended up turning out bad
>I have to keep it for a year
can I kill myself yet
How do I find one of these
where do I find one of these
I like how jealousy is such a completely ingrained response to anyone I know having a relationship at this point, even when i'm dating someone I still have crushes on other people and I still get disappointed when they find someone else and feel unlovable when they don't like me back, everyone else's relationship always makes me feel like a loser and like I'm left out
Is this something I can ever shake off?