Cis people: if you have kids, how would you respond to them coming out as trans?
Trans people: what are you going to do (if anything) to let your children explore their gender on their own terms?
I figure at the very least I'm gonna give all my kids gender neutral names to make things easier and try to use they instead of he/she when talking about them with other people while they're young. You know, just to help keep them guarded from gender policing a little bit.
trans girl here
I'm not really going to do much, I just won't emphasize gender roles.
If they want to transition later, that's fine.
>tfw some asshole shitposter reminds you that you will never have a functioning womb to shit out babbies for your man
Considering I'm not a single mom, fey socialist, or negligent, my kids won't become trannies.
I am just going to love my children and let them explore as they wish. I will give them options and they can choose from those. The only expectations I have from my children is that they remain happy, and healthy as they learn to love life.
This. They can play with whatever toys they want, and they can wear whatever they want, etc. Until they get old enough to tell me, I'll probably do a mix of traditionally feminine and masculine things.
not gonna have kids, coz i dont have a baby maker to pop them out of. and diddnt save any sperm, coz fuck that.
lol my parents are WASP's , are conservative republicans, are still together, and were very attentive while raising me...and guess what... it diddnt stop me from being trans.
luckily my parents arent assholes and they love and accept me.
I'm going to make them seriously question their assumptions about social gender roles and guarantee that they are suffering from a real mental illness as opposed to tumblritis and then I will support them in their medical journey to the hilt, 110%
Trans is fine. Trender is grounds for severe punishment
>try to use they instead of he/she when talking about them with other people while they're young.
>Until they get old enough to tell me, I'll probably do a mix of traditionally feminine and masculine things.
you're overthinking things. just treat them like human beings and don't force them to do things
What I'd do as a cis girl once forced into dresses against my will and currently (and often) mistaken for a man:
Go with the conventional genital-pronoun alignment but expose them early and often to the concept of transness. If possible, expose them to any trans friends I might have. Keep a sharp ear out if they mention anything regarding that, and make sure to be supportive.
I'd be an awful parent though so I don't want kids.
okay i'm mtf, but like,
what are you gonna do? if they wanted to transition i'd be seriously worried that it's because they looked up to me. not a chance i'd let them make any decisions like that before 16 unless it's that obvious.
hell i probably wouldn't even tell them i'm fucking trans if i could avoid it. let them know it exists, show them trans friends, whatever, but you don't want them aspiring to switch genders. that's extremely destructive and you want to avoid it at all costs.
>WASP's , are conservative republicans, are still together, and were very attentive while raising me...
>luckily my parents arent assholes and they love and accept me.
White people are best people, as it turns out.
Try that in a traditional Indian or Mexi family and you're gonna die
i'm never having kids but my friend who has a 7-year-old (she was a teen mom) has been doing pretty well on the gender front. when i was living with her she was careful to correct him when he mixed up my pronouns, and she does a good job of letting him wear dresses & nail polish, enjoy pink things, and collect mlp toys without making a big deal of it or insisting he must be a trans girl (he's pretty adamant about being a boy, too). she's explained to him what being trans is & said she'd be totally cool with it if he was trans, but doesn't pressure him into thinking he must be because of his hobbies (unlike certain people i used to know). she's also good at warning him about how some people might react if he does those things in public while letting him decide whether he wants to take those risks (we're in an area where at worst he'll get verbally harassed unless they're planning on going to certain places). like in general, she tries to let him make his own decisions as long as they won't hurt him or others (or will get other adults mad at him, like he's learned that swears are exclusively "grown-up words" etc.) and when she sets a strong rule, puts effort into explaining why it's a rule without acting like the explanation makes it negotiable.
I'd try to be as supportive and open minded as I can and do my best not to force anything on them.
Probably easier said than done cause I don't have kids.
I want to encourage my kid to be well rounded, but leave them leeway in how they do it.
My kids will need to be active, be well read, be critical thinkers, be problem solvers, and be able to express themselves.
I wouldn't force my boy to play football or my girl to do ballet, but they do have to do some sort of physical activity. They can't just be little fat blobs that poke around on their tablet all day.
They have to read books, on a subject or their choosing.
They have to practice an art, be it painting, drawing, sculpting, playing an instrument, singing, etc.
I know it might seem overbearing, but I think all people can be nourished in an environment where they can develop their creativity, athleticism and literacy.
Toys, clothes, and hairstyles within reason should be up to them.
I do think it is important for them not to push to extremes when they are going to school or doing similar activities. If my boy wanted to wear a poofy pink dress then that would be okay during his free time, but there is no way he is wearing that to school. He could wear a lot of gender neutral clothes to school, or even girl clothes, just nothing as overt as a dress or skirt in school. Mostly for his own protection.
I know the chances of having a trans child are very very small, but it is small things like this that would make me feel at ease with myself, knowing I could give a trans child a better upbringing than I had in a way that wouldn't hurt a cis child.
I would probably try to keep names close to gender neutral too, or at least a name with a gender neutral nickname. Name changes aren't that big of a hassle.
I would buy them a new wardrobe and promote indepth sexual exploration, underage sex and social activism.
I may need to quit my job and start homeschooling, to shield them from the horrors of the cisworld.
White people have medium brown hair at best.
If they have dark brown or black hair then they are not white. They probably have some arab, black, indian, or asian in them.
One drop rule.
I don't understand what you mean. I'll get a mix of boys and girls toys and clothes until my kid is old enough to tell me what they want. Then at the point they will get what they want within reason.
How is that forcing them to do anything or overthinking it?
my grandparents on both sides of my family literally got genealogy tests because they're both obsessed with family trees. we're completely european but have almost-black brown hair on my dad's (norwegian) side.
>Cis people: if you have kids, how would you respond to them coming out as trans?
I'm a guy.
I would put them on hormone blockers once they hit puberty and about 14 or 16 they can have hormones
I will not treat my kids any different than i would treat anyone else when it comes to gender stuff when they are born they are that sex so until they decide otherwise that is what they are.
This is impossible to answer correctly because I don't know what it's like to have a child. But I've always thought that the best you can do with your child is to listen and talk with him no matter what the issue happens to be. When I was 12 I was caught drinking alcohol and cutting my wrists and my parents flipped out and blamed everything on me. I wish they would have just listened to me that I was feeling miserable, but they never even asked why I was doing it and just grounded me.
Since the vast majority of people are comfortable with the gender and gender roles of their sex I'd start off raising their gender in accordance with their sex, however I wouldn't stop them from doing anything gender atypical.
this didn't show the part where Peter gets beaten to a pulp at school and ostracized and tortured for 12 years because his hippy mom "forgot" to tell him how to get along with normies.
>Trans people: what are you going to do (if anything) to let your children explore their gender on their own terms?
if i had kids i would just let them decide what kind of clothes, hairstyle etc. they want (nothing too crazy of course, no shorts in winter or stuff like that)
and i would try to have a good relationship to them so they know they can tell me everything and i will always love them and it doesn't matter to me if they're lgbt or anything
If they were trans i would try to get them the therapy and blockers they need of course
also i think i would be more comfortable to adopt (give birth to if science allows (it won't in my lifetime)) a daughter, because it would be really hard for me to tell a boy he can't do that because other kids could bully him or beat him up, it's just really sad imo
Black hair, dark brown eyes. I was told I was 100% white growing up. (And my parents were named Charles and Tracy, how fucking white can you get?) Suddenly, my grandmother remembers that my mother spoke fluent Spanish and looked at least half Hispanic. Did some DNA research, and I'm mixed.
Just from my own experience, I think you're probably right.
I would tell them that they are not going to become the gender they want to be. They are going to become a trans person. As long as they understand that they can do whatever they want.
Hispanics and latinos are white if they're white. Go tell a Spaniard or a Cuban or a Sicilian he's not white, I'll wait here.
It's only very recently that Hispanics that weren't mestizo have started separating themselves for white in general, thanks to identity politics bullshit where you get a cookie for declaring yourself a minority of some kind