/lgbt/, I'm going to be honest here. I'm a straight dude. I don't really get how the whole trans things works. However, I have a friend who was just diagnosed as trans (or whatever they call it). Instead of getting help and taking his meds though, he's throwing fits, getting into fights, and started working out.
His mom asked me to try and talk to him because he's my best friend. But to be honest I don't know what to do. When I tried talking to him he said things like:
> " It doesn't matter how I feel about my body"
> " I'm not that weak. "
> " I won't be weak. "
> " I am not a woman. "
> " I'm not some little bitch. "
Thing is, if he's been going to counseling (he has), his shrink isn't just going to diagnose him for shits and giggles. He had to have said things that lead to this, and even given affirmation.
So then why would he fight and struggle when he finally gets what most trans people dream about? He's still young enough to have this change his life for the better. Why is he fighting it?
Any advice on what to do or how to help him?
>So then why would he fight and struggle when he finally gets what most trans people dream about? He's still young enough to have this change his life for the better. Why is he fighting it?
A lot of trans women go through this before finally transitioning. They think that if they just embrace masculinity to its fullest that their feelings will go away. It is curious that he has been to a therapist and formally diagnosed, though. Like you said, he must have told the guy stuff like "I wish I was a woman"
I don't really know what you could do for him, since self-acceptance is ultimately his burden. I guess try your best to communicate that you'll be supportive no matter what decisions he'll make and that he has the right to pursue happiness like anyone else. Btw if he does come out, immediately switch to female pronouns for him, it'll be a massive self-esteem boost
How the fuck do you get "diagnosed" trans? From what Ive seen most trans people have no business transitioning. Now we are trying to diagnose people who don't even want to transition. Wtf... we already have enough broken freaks in the ranks
Trans don;t transition because they want to. We do it because we have to in order to have any happiness and stability in our lives. It gets to the point where death becomes preferable to living with dysphoria, and that is the real danger.
And his mom is asking you for help because... ?
He is doing whats right, fighting the dysphoria, not like all the faggots here, he doesnt want to ruin his life.
Help him and support him and go to the gym with him.
He's taking the right decision.
what lead his therapist to diagnose him with gender dysphoria?
how old is your friend?
this does sound like textbook repression. Its not uncommon for some transflok.
I went through something similar. I knew I was trans at around 9-10, and i completely repressed it. All through highschool i tried asserting myself as a "manly man." And of course i always came back to the thoughts of being in the wrong body, and the crossdressing, and i kept trying to repress it to the point of self harm and suicide.
Its a dark path to be going down, but sometimes they can be in so much denial that its impossible to reach them. all i can say is stay friends. Help them out and just be supportive and try to deter any self destructive behavior from them.
its something your friend is going to have to come to terms with on their own time.