>you will never have a group of bros to make politically incorrect banter with >you will never know the true emotional bonds of chilling with a few bros that are also alienated from normal society >you will never have somebody you can talk about anything with without worrying about them talking shit about you for it 4chan is nice, but it's not a substitute for the real thing.
>>24069627 Im depressed because i have been living with moderate tinnitus for 5 years now. I don't even care about GFS Chads or Betas. I would stay virgin for the rest of my life if it meant that my tinnitus would disappear. Life sucks and then you die I guess.
Seriously sometimes going out in public reminds me of how empty everything is. It's the same shit for miles and miles, and it just repeats. Nothing's special. It's just house after house after house after house. And everyone's just numbing their god damned brain so they can fit in with the idea that there's 7 fucking billion people and we're all fucking worthless.
>>24069627 life just feels empty and meaningless, all the days are the same, yesterday was no different from today and tomorrow will be the same. I think I am going to check out this winter, probably end of january, can't really go any futher with these fears and lies.
I'm depressed because I have a contrasting desire to not study for/put effort into classes and perform to ridiculous levels thanks to being a smart kid who coasted through high school. I feel like I'm shit at everything I'm trying now and I know a lot of people would kill to be in the position I'm in now but honestly I just feel awful so often. Almost had a public breakdown for no reason yesterday in front of a friend but managed to repress it all inside. Fuck, reading this now I realized I seem so petty and stupid
>>24069949 >Place the palms of your hands over your ears with fingers resting gently on the back of your head. >Your middle fingers should point toward one another just above the base of your skull. >Place your index fingers on top of you middle fingers and snap them (the index fingers) onto the skull making a loud, drumming noise. >Repeat 40-50 times. Some people experience immediate relief with this method. >Repeat several times a day for as long as necessary to reduce tinnitus. Dr. Jan Strydom, of A2Z of Health, Beauty and Fintess.org. >This always works for me.
>>24069627 Bedridden inside my home with my parents while in severe prescription drug withdrawal. By the time I'm off of my wrongly-prescribed meds, I'll have been stuck at home in excruciating pain for 10 fucking months. My life was just starting, now I can feel my nerves burning every waking moment as I tear the benzos from my system. There was so much for me to give to the world before this. I loved a wonderful woman, had an internship in Alaska lined up for this fall, I was going to be someone out in the world truly pursuing their dreams and living free. Now I have to pick up the pieces and start it all again. My body is weak, my mind is dull, and I have nothing left with which to bring purpose to my life. I can't stop shaking and sweating. This is hell.
Nothing matters, there is no fairness in this world. The doctor who did this to me is out there hurting more people, and I am powerless to stop him.
When you get better, everything has a meaning again and looks and feels much less shitty. I'll not tell you how because I'm going to get paid for it, you pieces of shit do not deserve free advices, you are lazy anyways and you cuddle yourself with pity and regret. Yeah, fuck off.
>born with face deformity >dull aching pain in face sometimes >atmospheric pressure changes cause extreme pain >walk outside >pain continually increases and experience dizziness >occasionally pass out or fall down during winter or windy days
I have had surgery, talked to multiple doctors, etc. Nothing has solved the issue. I can't stay outside for more than 15 minutes before it becomes annoying or distracting. Does anyone else experience this?
>>24070860 I had a brain tumor that paralized half of my face, I got a bit better since(more than 10 years ago), when it was cold outside it just didn't want to respond and I think I looked like a monster, tried not to think about it and tried to have fun with my friends. When I was alone though, I felt like you, anxiety is a bitch. It's all about anxiety and there's only one way to fight it, you have to expose yourself to the "danger" and get the time you do it, up and up. Little by little until the point were you just don't give a fuck and can go around without thinking about it.
>>24070860 >>24070954 It's posts like these that make me hate most of the stupid shit /r9k/ complains about. These are actual problems. Hope things get better for you guys.
>>24070949 that's what I'm doing. Unfortunately the incompetent fucktard I saw at Mass General Hospital (supposedly one of the best hospitals in the world) combined clonazopan with lyrica, a GABA-analog that acts like an opioid. To put it simply the two drugs amplify one another's effects, in both good ways and bad. It makes tapering off benzos a special kind of hell. I could die right now if I tried getting rid of the clonopin (benzo), so I have to taper off the Lyrica first before tackling it.
Honestly something like that is all I ever wanted. Making male friends seems impossible though because I grew up without a dad or brothers and I don't understand social dynamics in all-male situations. Tried a team sport in college and my lack of experience made me one of the laughing stocks of the team. Couldn't join the military cuz of diabeetus and that's honestly all I wanted to do with my life.
It's hard to find the point in trying to do anything anymore. Talking to people is easy but making the bridge from acquaintance to friendship seems completey impossible cuz everyone's already got friends and experiences.
Like you said 4chan isn't a replacement for the real thing but this is the only place I've ever felt like I belonged.
>>24071261 Good for you, seriously. I hate it when people I barely know that have met me once or twice think they can just fucking walk up to me and ask for an explanation to my life. Neighbors, so called "friends," shitty gossipy aunts, and distant relatives throughout these 9 months of my withdrawal have awkwardly asked me "so anon, uhhmm... are you still in school? Working?"
I just spit out shortly "medical problem" and they shut the fuck up and can no longer look at me. It makes people uncomfortable and rightfully so. Fuck them. We don't owe any of these assumption-making retards a thing.
>>24071380 Hey I get it, it's a shit feeling to have something holding you back like that, and to watch others go on with their lives as you stagnate, unable to control the thing detaining you. The funny thing is that the people who have real problems often seem to be the most silent and accepting of it. I don't understand why I do this. Sometimes it just feels like an attempt at a sort of survival you know?
>>24069627 Not really about the meaninglessness of life per se.
Rather it's the fact that I'm 35 years old, make around 32K after taxes even though I have two masters degrees (one from an ivy league university). I have left ventricular heart failure from a failed suicide attempt. I'm fat. Also my best and only friend just overdosed on heroin and died last weekend. I also have a pretty bad drinking problem, which doesn't really help out my heart condition any.
Also, I haven't had sex with a woman where money wasn't involved in over a decade.
>>24071354 Exactly what I used to do. And exactly how people were treating me. Seriously, they can go on and I love to make them feel better about themselves, it will make their lives less shitty for 5 minutes.
>Nothing is exiting for me anymore >fapping to more and more taboo things >drinking wine and smoking cigars don't cut it anymore. Might mix some peyote in with my home-brew >buying more and more luxurious things, now shopping for a small house at the age of 19 >work bores the shit out of me >I'm so asocial I can't make any friends outside of work and have not had one since high school >so cynical I think of having a wife simply as a piece of unstable property that might take off with all your shit
>>24071628 And then they'll go back at smoking pot, blaming the world for tfw no gf, back to think that new watch might gran them some pussy, back to thinking that Anon's life is better than their life even though they're perfectly healthy...wonder why Anon is always so full of life, righteous, always know how to handle thoughts, wonder why he looks like he don't need what we need to feel happy and satisfied...yep, and then when they hit their 30s they have a kid with a Stacy that will become a Stacy-on Wagon in terms of size, divorce and so on.
>Moved back to the house I used to live 5 years ago >5 years have passed and I'm not even a bit close to my goals >Everything around me reminds me of the time I discovered that my dad was cheating on my mother, and reminds me of the last few months we shared as a family >4 people moved out, only 3 returned, and 1 is about to leave >All the good experiences I had feel like a dream because I'm back to this status quo of sorts
>5 years ago I spent hours in front of the computer reading about memes on ED and discovering anime >Today I spend hours in front of the computer posting memes on 4chan and watching anime
>very socially inept >manlet >failing school >shitty family >no social life except talking to people online while playing video games
Life is just so fucking painful except for the time i spend abusing drugs, i have not had a truly good time without drugs in years. Social ineptness is probably my biggest problem, I inherited aspergers and it has made me very asocial. Even when I'm with close friends I act so distant. I feel permanently unfulfilled with little to no desires and the desires I feel i'm always working to reach. While working towards my goals i feel constant pain and when i reach them i feel very little happiness, if any.
I'm depressed that my old man is most likely going to die soon, possibly before I graduate from college
his reason for living is to see his sons be able to make it on their own, and we're both colossal fuck-ups I don't want my father to die believing his life is for nothing, even if I'll probably just an hero or something after he passes
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