I'm at work, bored, and a lazy sack of shit. So here's a screencap thread.
Eh fuck it. I'm just gonna keep dumping until I run out of pics.
Do people actually get pissy about that one?
You missed last two screencap & /tg/ stories threads if you ask.
I haven't read it past the first few lines cause I'm a lazy fuck as well but I've seen some people in threads go apeshit about it.
I think it might be because it got hyped too much too fast, but for some reason, yes, some people really do seem to hate this.
It provokes some irrational reaction of "oh it's not real" or "no john you are the that guys".
I kinda like it myself.
Honestly I've been ignoring the "discussion" (shit-flinging) in the thread threads for the last few of them, and just grabbed images I liked.
Why are people so butthurt about it, though? It's no dumber than most of the other things posted.
Same, honestly. I figure it's probably not true, but I really hope it is.
Oh well, I might at least post the stories that I saved last time.
Eh, I don't think it's that bad. The books have their uses, even in non-magical-realm games.
Like when we needed a basis for whether or not our paladin had just accidentally become father of what was functionally the antichrist.
That one samefag who finds every thread with this in and does nothing but complain about it for the whole thread and contribute nothing.
Possibly, I have no reason to doubt he would be here.
Can't speak his name, to do so is to invoke him here to derail the thread
What a wonderful circlejerk of old and/or mediocre threads.
While I have no problem with thread threads, this one is just poorly curated, to the point where if this were a museum, your children would be thrown inside along with yourself and the mob would torch the whole building to the ground.
Fuck all of you. Just post some damn pics
Nope. Sorry :(
I'm afraid I don't quite understand the question. Glad you liked it though
Sadly I posted >>34126185 just before seeing this thread
Here's one I have, but I've never seen it in one of these threads before...
No, pretty sure it was the Book of Unlawful Carnal Knowledge. Arcane Nymphology was a little more juvenile and stupid--had Big Gay Allosaurus as one of its new monsters.
the BoUCK was sorta-kinda more professional...except for the bit about porn mags.
Reading this story when it was brand new was my first real exposure to LARP. I'd heard of it sure, but I thought they were the lowest tier of nerds and had nothing to do with them. After reading it I showed it to a friend, and he showed it to his friends. Me and yet another friend even LARPed for the first time, in a cowboy-themed one (only one available) at a convention we were at. The first friend I showed it to has said that when I get married, for my bachelor party he's taking us LARPing
That one was terrible. It was so over-the-top and fake as to be ridiculous. The second LARP thread is to the first one as Curse of the Black Pearl is to At World's End
Pic related is a doozy. So worth the read. Might actually get DEUS VULT tattooed on my chest, still thinking about it.
yeah, I meant other way around, sorry. It's 3 am here.
Elves take years to practice their magics, writing, thinking, pondering, drawing their finger across the top of the lake...
Humans set off a depth charge in the lake and let the water collect in buckets.
Elves initiate minute transactions between magic and themselves, immersing their being with the magical reserve...
Humans crash a jeep into the bank, hold up the boundary at gunpoint, tell it to put the knowledge in the bag, then blow a hole in the side of the safe and load up money from there while the boundary is busy.
We need less HFY, because HFY is an excessively artificial and poorly constructed concept that not even the people who propagate it can reach a consensus about what it means, and people just use it as a three letter banner to post and repost some of the worst writing ever to stain /tg/.
It's shitty wank where anything and everything is justified by "HUMANS ARE SO AWESOME," when that's only a point of pride for people who've got nothing else.
So, in short, fuck you, Shithead, and fuck your shitty threads that only fuckheads like your shitty self think need to be made every three days, and fuck your shitty reposts of reposts of reposts of the same fucked and shitty fuckshit stories that were never even good to begin with.
I do agree that when the point of the story is "The humans are walking demigods..." they tend to suck, mary-sue-ism isn't gonna get you friends here on /tg/. However, some hfy simply plays off the versatility in humanity, ala D&D, and those dodge a great deal of the mary sue pitfalls. All in all, you've gotta use Sturgeons law here, that means that if there are 100 hfy stories, 10 of them have the potential to not be utter shit (although it could be closer to 1 in 10,000).
>So, in short, fuck you, Shithead, and fuck your shitty threads that only fuckheads like your shitty self think need to be made every three days, and fuck your shitty reposts of reposts of reposts of the same fucked and shitty fuckshit stories that were never even good to begin with.
Take it easy.
Also, What's HFY?
"Humanity Fuck Yeah"
I believe the original intent was to avert the standard fantasy version where every alternate race is superior to humanity in some way, but typically instead turned into masturbatory fanfic about how humans were so ossum and better than every other race.
Yeah, first couple threads were: Humanity is different/better/fills this scifi niche normally given to aliens in this way because reasons. Aliens still have the leg up in other areas, usually the ones where humans are normally the best.
A favorite was that no one else in the galaxy breathes oxygen, forcing humans to live in pressure suits when around other species. As a side effect we got really good at engineering and making space suits.
Not 100% /tg/, but I know someone here will appreciate this.
not that anyone living today hasn't already seen it.
At the end of my previous semester at university, my exam ended up being an analysis of a story called "Vandmollen" ("The Watermill") from around 1900 by a famous Danish author, which follows an old grumpy miller and his slightly plump red-headed daughter.
The archetype seems quite old.
some HFY is good, some not so good.
I'm not really sure how to explain this to a child, but after you reach a certain point in your development you stop having this insecure need for everything you read to be as sophisticated as (you think) you are and just learn to enjoy things on whatever level they're presented to you on.
Fuck, forgot to add image.
This always restores my faith in humanity.
Here's the over-the-top unofficial sequel.
And here's the direct sequel.
Personally, the direct is better, but the unofficial one's got its own charm in an off-the-wall kind of way.
The Emperor loves it when a plan comes together.
Nope. He goes onto a parody of Madoka, then writes a bunch of travelogues about china and australia before going home to make brief cameos in Unseen Academicals
Personally, The last continent was the high point in Rincewind's career, but then again, i loved monstrous regiment, so i'm a faggot.
While meant to be humorous, I find this is actually a very valuable tip
This reminds of the thread from a few weeks ago where OP asked /tg/ if a pregnant enraged barbarian considered her fetus as a secondary target.
Within 3 posts /tg/ had not only called OP a fag; but had stated that male barbarians would see their sperm as targets and every male enraged barbarian would start punching themselves in the junk uncontrollably.
In 5 posts they had created a d&d bestiary entry for sperm. complete with hp damage types and CR
In 8 posts they were discussing how to animate cum golems.
I love this board.
Engine Heart looks like an incredibly fun system. The above linked story and this one are both adorable.
I thought that was more of a parody of Faust more than anything else. After all, the cover is Faust crossed out and rewritten as Eric. Then again, Madoka was heavily inspired by Faust, and I suppose that Eric was parodying Madoka's source material as opposed to the anime itself.
Whenever anyone posts this screencap, I get all existential. I mean, I remember that thread. Hell, I was in that thread.
And I always think to myself, "Maybe I shouldn't be spending so much time on /tg/."
But then I just end up coming back here because I'm a piece of shit.
I say the GM's wrong, because the players were interested in other things than the GM's plotline. It comes across to me as the GM being petty and saying "skeletons fall, everyone dies" for the crew not following the railroad.
This. This is why getting player buy-in is so important, and if the players aren't engaged with the story you wanted you have to find some other interesting thing (for both you and them) to throw at them.
I think so.
The Lich and his Skeletons shouldn't just disappear because the players are more interested in creating a democratic pro-gay-rights nation.
I'm not in the habit of retconning stuff i've said because people are uninterested in it. Of course, I would have given them some more hints about the impending doom of the Lich.
So there are literally no other adventurers capable of stopping him?
Have a giant festival and parade thrown to celebrate the guys what actually got shit done and who now can live on found treasure for the rest of their natural lives, and who coincidentally now have enough social sway to change gay marriage laws with a snap of their fingers.
THAT's the proper way to do it.
Isn't this basically what Grey Guards are for?
Exactly. It's not petty revenge for refusing the follow the plot the DM made. They were warned the lich would end life as they knew it and they ignored the warning so they could do their own thing. This wasn't "rocks fall, everyone dies" because that implies something completely out of the blue. This was entirely predictable.
Granted, I'm not saying the DM doesn't share some of the blame. The campaign sounds boring and cliche, and I don't blame the players for rebelling. If you, as a GM, want to avoid this kind of situation, give the players a campaign they'll actually want to play.
I'm here to laugh at screencaps, not read your blog
I think level is more about telling you about the power of a level 20 fighter compared to a level 15 fighter, not cross-class.
If fighters are weaker but you still want to run it balanced, give the fighter faster leveling
Here it is if you didn't have it already.
No fuck you. Level 20 Wizard is like Batman with a Green Lantern ring. Level 20 Fighter is (supposed to) be Superman.
Level 20 wizard gets shit done through his adaptability, creativity, utility, knowledge, training, and willpower.
Level 20 fighter SHOULD be tunnelling through rock with his bare hands, no tools necessary, leaping over mountains, blowing away armies by breathing on them, and throwing gods into the sun.
Because he should be equally as powerful as the fucking wizard, just in completely different ways.
That was my attempt at humor.
I shouldn't quit my day job, should i?
Many thanks to the anons who have come before me and filled this thread with wonder.
What I've learned in my short time on /tg/ is that the people who hate this story, REALLY hate this story.
They're like vegans in that regard: just can't fucking wait to tell you!
Oh, I've also been looking for good angry rant caps. In particular, that one where someone said something stupid about swords and the reply came from a "Roman Emperor" who, after fucking several young Greek boys in their asses, says that the anti-sword guy just said the gayest thing he'd ever heard.
Wizards strike again!
I still like HFY because it makes a fun thought exercise and a good jumping off point for short stories, I just wish that they weren't all about war
That's why I wrote one that isn't about war.
QUESTION FOR ALL IN THIS THREAD:
Which screencap format do you like best? If you could pick one screencap from this thread and say that it is arranged the best, clearest, funniest way possible (if it's meant to be funny), which would you pick?
I ask because I'm working on screencapping the old /tg/ rap battle thread, and I want to know how to arrange it.
Just straight blocks of text down the page if at all possible. Having things that are not neatly arranged is terrible unless it's reactions to a single main post.
If you need to do columns to fit it all in, try and fit is so that at a readable zoom there is one column per screen-width.
Thoughts on screencaps like pic related or >>34136488?
That one is pretty good because there's only a main story that everyone else references. 8/10 for style.
>>34136488 is a mess. There's the main post about wheel skeletons, than some anon posting his own side-story connected by little lines, intermixed with reactions to the original post and some to various other posts in the thread. 4/10.
Wizards are listening, anon. Wizards hear your cry and come to your aid with Haste
I have a decent HFY from Tumblr, gets into wankery at the end, though.
This is lazy storytelling at is worst.
The elemental plane of 'whatever I need in infinite amount'. I saw references in other /tg/ to the elemental plane of Salt, the elemental plane of Jelly, the elemental plane of beer and the elemental plane of Jizz.
>Talking shit about the elemental plane of salt
Do you even storytime, anon?
Portal to the Quasielemental plane of ammo. It was used in one of my games to explain why the engineer's turret can shoot forever without reloading or needing to be restocked.
>He tried to explain homosexuality being tolerable
>They still decided gays were the most important thing
>Liches don't normally stop attacking just because MUH GAYS got legalized
Unless the lich is only attacking in an attempt to finally get gay marriage legalized in the kingdom where he used to live with his (secret) boyfriend, and decided to attack and install his own government accepting of gays.
Here, have another story about unreliable narrators creating something good
>That feel when you can, and it invariably becomes awkward
Anyone have the one about a chubby naive elf dispelling a cosmic horror BBEG through the power of love and friendship in a grimdark setting? I've been looking for it everywhere!
Because for a while it got posted everyday as "Hah look at these freeform fags isn't this story so clever and Edgardo is awesome!!!1!"
It's an alright story, most likely made up, that got heralded as the best bit of RP to ever occur.
Beh we need an engineheart play by post. The pathfinder play by post i settled on because no engineheart is paced well enough to allow life to do it's thing around your game. We started on aug 1st and still havent done more than walk up a hill.
I remember the best thread about Dungeons and Dragons.
The one who posted that.
Yeah, I still laugh when xeno players complain, because I've eaten so much shit from xenos players for my smurf army.
The pain of having no true foes left to build your glory upon.
Oh man, it's so weird remembering how short threads were back then.
Back when the post limit was 150, a 75 post thread was a novel, while a 200 post thread was some sort of mythical beast.
Of course, there were also some threads that people don't even believe anymore, like an 800+ post story thread.
Oh, my bad. Then yeah, what >>34167497 said.
Duck and Cover was a strategy they taught to kids in North America (and maybe elsewhere, I don't know) during the Cold War about how to protect yourself from nuclear attacks by hiding under your schooldesks. It wouldn't actually do anything, but it supposedly made people feel safer to know drills were being conducted to protect their children.
Dude, I know about Duck and Cover. I'm a fucking history major from America with a focus on the military. What I *don't* get is this stupid post >>34166223. It makes no sense! WTF is this about black and red? What? "We will never ever attack chaos in its territory" WHAT?
I mean, it's gibberish. Did everyone see the damn comedy standup it's apparently based on except for me? Jesus Christ
I don't understand any of the WH40K universe, stranger.
Trust me, learning the 40k universe won't help you understand that post
I don't have it, but I can remember the general gist.
Each unit of Night Goblins can have up to three Fanatics in it. When they get within a certain distance of an enemy unit, the night goblins push the fanatics out in front of them, then (presumably) book it in the opposite direction.
A 1500 (?) point army can field a general, a shaman and 21 ten-model units of night goblin spearmen. This means that it is potentially possible to have 63 fanatics on the field at the same time.
Fanatics don't move like normal units. They scatter each turn.
This means it's possible to be forced by the rules of the game to roll 63 sets of scatter dice at the start of each round, then move 63 different models, resolve all the hits that come about as a result, then finally resolve the rest of the turns.
I wanted to post the reaction image of the cat looking alarmed with its ears back, implying I was surprised and somewhat confused by your post, but the image limit won't allow me
I'd have ?ed out your response and though I'm not sure that I'd have liked it, I would have definitely posted something in response for you to ? out as well.